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Comfortable. That’s how Jeongin feels every time he rests his head on Hyunjin’s lap. That’s how he feels right now; even more so as Hyunjin gently pets his hair. Hyunjin stops every now and then when he gets immersed in a scene of whatever’s on tv, but quickly resumes after Jeongin taps his knee.
That's how most of their Saturday afternoons have been lately—simple and relaxing. Jeongin comes over and spends the night. Even though it’s his home, Hyunjin always ends up giving in to whatever the younger wants to do.
At this time Hyunjin would be making a snack or starting on dinner, but right now, food is the last thing on his mind. All he can think about is the revelation he made a few hours ago while looking through his SD cards.
He likes Jeongin.
Not “like,” as in like as a friend or as a little brother or as a potential roommate. He likes Jeongin, in a way that means I can’t stop thinking about you and I really really want to kiss you but I don't know if you’d find that weird. He doesn’t know exactly how long he’s felt this way. However, he does know that if he doesn’t tell his best friend that he likes him any time soon, he might just implode.
“Hey Jeongin,” Hyunjin calls, keeping his eyes on the screen. Jeongin hums in response, sending some wave of electricity coursing through Hyunjin’s veins.
Curious as to why Hyunjin doesn’t continue, Jeongin turns on his back to look up at him.
“What is it?” he asks innocently.
This has happened a million times before. They are almost always this close, yet Hyunjin can’t stop the immense pounding in his chest right now. Maybe it’s because of the way the sunlight hits Jeongin’s eyes. Maybe it’s the fact that his lips are so close, yet so far away.
If only he could take a picture of Jeongin and show him just how pretty he looks right now.
That’s it!
“We haven’t used my camera in a while,” Hyunjin suggests.
“You mean your film camera? I thought you said it was broken.”
“I never said it was broken, just… old.” This conversation is going nowhere, Hyunjin thinks.
“You want me to get it?” Jeongin offers. Hyunjin nods like his lips are glued shut. Who knows whatever nonsense might slip out if he talks? The moment Jeongin disappears into the room, Hyunjin’s head falls into his hands. Why is confessing so hard?
Jeongin returns shortly with the camera in his hand. He fumbles with the on button before handing it to Hyunjin.
“I think you need to charge the battery,” he says, to Hyunjin’s dismay. So much for that option. “I’ll go plug them—”
“It’s fine. I was just stalling anyways,” Hyunjin sighs, placing the camera on his coffee table. Here goes nothing.
“I like you.”
All Jeongin can do is stand there, in awe. He doesn’t speak or react or anything. He just stands there, blinking in utterly excruciating silence. If Hyunjin’s heart was pounding before, it’s definitely about to break out of his chest now. His mind races along with his pulse, throwing all sorts of feelings of embarrassment and regret at his face. It’s too late to take anything back now. He wishes he could, but he can’t.
“I’m sorry,” he apologises. “I probably shouldn’t have said any–” Jeongin cuts Hyunjin’s apology short by placing his lips on Hyunjin’s for two seconds. Now it’s Hyunjin’s turn to blink in shock. Did that really just happen?
“I like you too. Have for a while now, actually.”
This time, Hyunjin closes the distance between them. The kiss goes on for much longer than the first, but it’s still soft and gentle. It’s kind of experimental, a bit timid, since Hyunjin’s never actually kissed Jeongin. Sure, he’s imagined it, but his imagination can do no justice for the real feeling.
His imagination can’t supply the tenderness of Jeongin’s lips right now, nor can it mimic how unreasonably jelly-like his knees are at this moment. His hands find their way to Jeongin’s cheeks and Jeongin’s arms find their way around Hyunjin’s waist. It’s like both of their bodies are made of polar magnets, indubitably attracted to one another.
For a second, Jeongin takes the lead. He pulls Hyunjin closer, probably a bit too strongly, for they both lose balance and fall not-so-gently onto the couch. Hyunjin adapts quickly, adjusting his knees on either side of Jeongin’s thighs.
“Sorry, I didn't mean to fall like that,” Jeongin manages to breathe out when they finally unlink for air.
Hyunjin smiles fondly and lands a quick peck on Jeongin’s forehead. “So… you said you’ve liked me for a while now.” Another peck, this time on Jeongin’s cheek. “Exactly how long is a while?” Another peck on Jeongin’s other cheek.
“I don’t know exactly… maybe around the second time you invited me over?”
Surprised, Hyunjin leans back, almost toppling over. Thanks to Jeongin’s arms around him, he doesn’t fall.
“A year? Now I kind of feel like an idiot for never realising,” Hyunjin pouts.
“You could make up for it right now.”
“How–” Jeongin shuts him up yet again with another peck on the lips. “You really like doing that, don’t you?”
With that, Hyunjin leans in again. He kisses with more haste than last time, slipping in a dash of tongue every few seconds. Jeongin also lets go of any apprehension from before and catches up to Hyunjin’s speed, sometimes even going slightly faster. It’s as if Hyunjin’s lips are alcohol, and Jeongin’s a wasted alcoholic.
Hyunjin suddenly pulls back and asks, “Wait, does this mean you’re my boyfriend now?”
“Only if you’ll be mine.”
Hyunjin finally resumes the kiss, making a mental resolution to not cut off any more kisses from now on. Jeongin’s stomach grumbles, but they both try their best to ignore it. Then it grumbles again, and Hyunjin forces himself to pull away.
“I guess I should start cooking dinner, shouldn’t I?” Hyunjin sulks.
Jeongin smiles sheepishly and it takes every last drop of sanity within Hyunjin not to kiss him again.
(He does it anyway.)