Work Text:
“ this is page one of the process of my evolution ”
because i want to hold you, i walk with my two legs
because it’s lonely on my own, i breathe with you
he steadies his breathing, before letting his tears flood the room.
he doesn't know why this is happen. why isn't he leaving? he wish he understood sunny.
his best friend, his partner in crime, the love of his life.
he doesn't know how many times he's fallen in love with sunny, it just happens over and over again.
sunny is holding him close, as if dark were embracing the light.
at least, that's what basil liked to think of it as.
he's in love, it feels wrong. he shouldn't feel this way, everything was his fault after all, right?
...or was it something, the manifestation of that guilt and trauma that haunted him and sunny for years.
at the very least, they're in this together.
huh? that’s weird…
the front foot i'd half-put out to come over and embrace you
has somehow started to hurt you
sunny feels the same, but he too is scared to admit it.
they were criminals, correct? to fake a murder as a suicide together, being haunted by that guilt together for years.
they were best friends... what if it ruined their friendship?
he didn't want to keep thinking about it.
the words i just learned become a knife that pierces through you
tearing your life to pieces
rule number one, never let children near sharp objects ever.
or well, they weren't children per se, but 16 year olds are still young and dumb.
sunny watches as this something of guilt, teeth and eyes, embraces his friend.
it hurts, he can't breathe. basil is begging him to not leave, he obliges out of fear.
“then, before the knife is released, i'll seal off your mouth
with my mouth”
they fight, they don't want to, but it happens anyways.
he wants to protect sunny, to keep him safe, he wants him to be okay.
they both struggle to breathe, things are getting tough.
but it's okay, everything is going to be okay.
hey, suck in my breath again now
i try to say “i love you,” but
instead i’m living my whole life as a sort of oxygen tank
something is gone, that guilt is gone, everyone knows.
the two boys are injured, in the hospital, but alive nonetheless. everyone is relieved and happy, everything is better now.
once everyone leaves, sunny and basil are all alone again.
for once, sunny opens his mouth, letting out the words-
"i love you."
suck in the words i've spit out and breathe no more