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It starts simple, with cute, colorful bouquet he get, after staying in infirmary far too long, his friends considered. He smiles sheepishly at them; it’s not like he wants it, but he needs to recover properly, the skin around his injuries itching a little, raw still, before taking up missions again.
He recognizes few of them, peonies and sliver of bright pansies tucked inbetween, beautiful hydrangeas here and there, because sometimes he helps Inumaki in garden, while the other shows him names for these, who bloomed out already.
Maki puts them in vase, on the shelf, next to his head; says it’s from all of them, but there's a gleam of mischief in her eyes, as she points out it was Toge, who picked the flowers himself, as he know a great deal about it.
He gives the boy questioning look, his white-haired friend just shruging gently.
Then Inumaki signs, his movments slow and precise, because Yuuta’s still learing, and he suddenly feels warmth spreading at his chest. ‘Get well soon.’
He has great friends, doesn’t he?
Then, it continues; he's finally off the bed rest, and maybe he should stop and wonder, what it was for, but he doesn't give it a lot of thoughts, not really.
It's pretty and he knows that taking care of flowers and picking them, when it's at it best, makes Toge happy and content, and who is he, if not the person to encourage it further, appreciate it. He knows the limited speech makes Toge feel lonely at time, what with him not being able to express himself properly, creating misunderstandigs and such, and the sign language is something, not everyone are willing to learn, he himself wish to try, though; so really, giving people flowers may be something to make up for this, to remind the people they're important, special to him.
He always think of Inumaki, he's anything but lacking; the other only giving him incredulous look, when he says that, like he doesn't really believe him, but still try to humour him, rolling his shoulders gently. Maybe yes, maybe no.
One day Yuuta is going to make him understand that, one day, for sure.
Anyway, the flowers are still coming his way; sometimes Toge delivers it for him personaly, only nodding his head, soft "shake" leaving his lips, when Yuuta asks, "is that for me?" Sometimes, he finds them in his room, at his desk, tucked in crystal vase, he didn't really own prior to that, numerous or single ones, varying in colors and sizes and genres.
He smiles sheepishliy, he doesn't know all of them, despite some: pink roses, bouquets of daffodils, pure white camellias, but he still thanks for it all, straight to Toge's face or when they see each other, after discovering another one.
Today, he finds single pink hyacinth left out on his desk, a little note tucked next to it, saying 'meet us at five, we have mission'. He looks at his watch, swears, because he only has few minutes left, as he just came back from his solo training, in desprete need of shower. He makes it work, his clothes a little askew, black hair still dripping with water, when he arrives in front of the building, at the estabilished time. Maki and Panda are giving him puzzled look, due to his entrance resembling tornado.
"Are you in rush?" the girl asks, arching her brow. She snickers at his uniform's buttons done incorrectly.
"Huh?", he squeaks, "we're not going on mission? Like, now?"
She gives him an unimpressed look, "no, we were supposed to hang out today, Toge didn't tell you?"
His face drain out of colour, that little-, only for blush to return to his cheeks, doubled in intesity. He feels so embarrassed, waiting for earth to swallow him whole. When he sees that little punk, he-
His thoughts are cut short, courtesy of loud, enchanting laugh, he is not able to hear that often. His eyes widens, mouth open a little, and he really forgets he is supposed to be mad at the other boy, as he was made fun of, because- it's a beautiful sound and he only blushes harder, looking at the latter, like he was betrayed by him greatly, slight pout already forming on his face. Toge only laughs louder.
'Maybe you should change into something more casual', the other boy dares to sign.
He sends him glare, which is only meet with arched, narrow eyebrow, since he's not threatening at all; what with his awkward, doe-eyed self. Sometimes, he hates it.
But he can't stay mad long, not at Toge, so he just breaths in and out, goes to his room and changes. Then, they head out together, talking and telling jokes, and Toge shares his onigiri wit him; how could he stay angry after that, really?
They're eating, squashed together on a bench, faces turned towards the sun, basking in it. A quiet, peaceful moment. So rare, lately.
"Hm?", he asks, turning his eyes to Toge, who grabed at his elbow gently.
He squints a little at the other's hands, forming gestures, deliberately. He furrows his brows, "flower?"
"Ah, yes", he finally gets it, "it was very nice, thank you!"
The smile Inumaki sends his way, and he's sure it is the case, as it reaches amethyst eyes, giving that special kind of wrinkles to skin around, so cute, is enough to make him swoon, a little.
He's meet with bunch of sunflowers, shoved right into his hands, another day, soft "konbu" offered in greeting.
"Ah, yes", he smiles, "hello to you too", finally takes it.
It's bright and beautifully developed, resembling him of the sun. It makes him wonder, "why these ones?"
Toge seems slightly taken aback, for a moment; there's a soft tint of red coloring his cheeks, peaking from behind his high-collared uniform, but it's short-lived. The other boy just levels him with cool, suave look, his brows rised high in silent challenge, don't you like it?
"No, no!", he brings one of his hands up, the bouquet tucked safely in crock of his elbow, waves it a little back and forth, "I like it very much, it's just-", he fails and cuts on his sentence, because Maki snickers loudly, while listening to them, so he looks at her baffled.
He takes notice of Inumaki giving her death glare, his ametysth eyes burning, screaming, don't you dare; he blinks, doesn't really know what to make out of the exchange, passing between his friends, so he just shruggs and let its go.
She finds him, days later, when he is trying to make some space for another flowers he recived today.
Lately, Toge is presenting him with lots of them (strange determination in his eyes), most likely due to blooming season starting already, and he isn't the only one staying on the receiving end, really, so he just smiles, not giving it a lot of thoughts, thanks sincerly and takes it. His whole desk occupied with vases, full of lavender roses and amaryllis standing proud, put in pairs and others, he's not so sure about the names for.
Knowing smirk spreads on her lips, mischief shining in her eyes, "oh my", she nods her head in the direction of the ones he's holding right now, not sure how to arrange them best, next to others, yet, "are those red camellias?"
He furrows his brows, obviously not on the same page as she, "i mean, maybe, why?"
She is smirking even harder now, but her eyes are quickly softening; joyful, sincere look shining in them.
"So, are congratulations in order?", she teases.
"Huh?", he squeaks unintelligent, gawks at her.
Her smirk is gone, pensive look making its way to her face, "are those not from Toge?"
"They are, y-yes", he stammers a little, cherry red to his cheeks, "but, it's not like that", he pauses, catching glace of her unimpressed face, as she crosses her arms.
"He is giving flowers to lots of people, you included", is what he settles on, finally.
Her eyes widens suddenly, it's hilarious really, her mouth opening in suprise. "Tell me you're kidding."
"What?", he asks a little forceful now, getting aggitated quickly; blush still present on his face, burning, also embarrassment is taking him hostage, and he doesn't like to be put in situations like that, undisclosed, and making his head spins, because- what is she going on about?
A minute passes, then two. There's frown settling on her features; he snaps, not patient enough. Not now.
"Isn't he?", he challanges her, "giving you flowers also? Because I can swear I've seen him giving you bouquet of colorful stocks, the other day-"
She cuts in, throwing her hands in the air, annoyed with him greatly, "yes, because it's friendship flowers and he likes to communicate his feelings that way sometimes and-"
Now, he is the one who stops her, "friendship flowers? Huh? His feelings? What do you mean?"
She stares at him, like he just grown another head. Then, she laughs loudly, in her custom hyena laugh way, and Yuuta is tempted to leave. He could, sure, but it's his room, for God's sake, also, he really need to put those red camellias, still siting awkwardly at his hands, somewhere; he gives them a long, accusing look.
"You're really hopeless, aren't you?", she sighs.
It takes a lot out of him to not get considerably offended, as she mutters under her breath, words of "a lost cause" and "i swear to Gods", from what he can hear.
But then, she searches for her phone, finds it, write something down and thrust the device in front of his face; browser opened at 'red camellia meaning' page and suddenly he's dying, chokes down on his own spit, so she rushes to slap at his back. He's dying, his ears, cheeks, whole face really, hot and tomato red; ready to pass out.
He's dying, because red camellias stands for 'love, passion and deep desire for someone' and so, 'he' may be that 'someone' for Toge and, oh my god, was his friend confessing to him, the whole time, and he didn't even notice?
Maki's right, he's a lost cause.
He spends next hour searching and reading about 'language of flowers', 'flowers meanings' and such, trying to remember all flowers he got; he's dying still, especially as he catches the sight of 'amaryllis meaning', and what it stands for: someone find you incredibly beautiful, but also value you beyond your beauty. Yuuta's soul is leaving his body.
Red camellias lies forgotten for now, but soon he will give them a look, take one of these and put it on his palm, while smiling gently; his eyes shining a little with unshed tears of joy.
He hesitates before the door, his heart beating so loudly, he can actually hear it; his heart is set on what he is going to do, there's no other option, really, but it doesn't make it easier. The irrational fear nagging at him, unwelcome thoughts in his head, what if it isn't the case, what if Toge-?
Then, the door opens by itself, amethyst eyes blinking at him in slight suprise, from the other side of it.
He doesn't know what to do, where to look, his blush returning; wait and see, it may stay on him permanently. He can't bring himself to glance in the other boy's eyes, not really, so he settles lower, on his chest and then on his hands, because, oh, Toge's left hand is wrapped around single, dark red carnation.
Yuuta is trying really hard to appear cool and collected on the outside, but he's so bad at this, and his heart makes a flip in his chest, somersault, because inside he's a mess, just thinking about its meaning, and that maybe Toge was on his way to seek him out, and-
Yuuta's not so sure, if he makes it alive out of here.
Still, he takes a deep breath and look in the other's eyes, finally, his hands trembling a little, at his sides. Every coherent thought leaves him, Toge's eyes are so pretty, so he just blurts out stupidly, "for me?"
Toge seems unsure of himself, split second only, then determination comes to his eyes, the one Yuuta has seen before and really, he should see this coming, oh my god, he's an absolute moron, and Inumaki holds it out for him to take, "shake". Yes, it's for you.
"Tuna?", he adds, his eyes shining, challange and playful glint inside, will you accept it?
He's so good at this, so brave and bold about what he wants and feels, fearless, and Yuuta simply adore the younger one for it.
And Yuuta knows, it's not about flowers anymore, it's about everything, about the boy's love and affection, and if he is willing to accept that, cherise that, reciprocate that.
(And how could he not?)
So, he just takes it; their hands brush slightly, shiver ripping through his body, from his head down to his toes, it's electrifying. He holds it close to his chest, leveled with his heart, grabs one of Toge's hand tightly, but pulls at it gently. With care, leaving the final decision to Toge.
The other follows willingly, his body relaxing next to Yuuta's, as he brings his lips to white-haired boy temple and whispers into its skin, his mouth close enough to seal it with a kiss, "thank you."
Thank you for feeling this way about me.