Chapter Text
Beomgyu hated it. He hated it so much.
Everyday felt the same, and it looked like his only intention was to get through the day. Wake up, go to school, sit in a chair all day, go home, do his stupid homework, and stay up late. Every single day.
He hated the world for being unfair. Nothing was fair, to be honest. His parents died when he was 10, and his stepmother hated him so he decided to move to an apartment alone. Probably another reason why his stepmother hated him was because of his mental disorder.
Dissociative Identity Disorder wasn’t fun at all. He started having it right after his parents died, some say it might have been his way of coping. This disorder caused him to have another personality, a personality way, way different than him- happier, more social, energetic- Beomgyu could tell people liked that personality of his more than Beomgyu himself.
He decided to name his other personality “Gyu”. Gyu appears whenever Beomgyu wakes up from sleep or from being unconscious and vice versa. Beomgyu usually got annoyed because of Gyu- of course there are days when it’s Gyu’s “turn” and he makes friends with people at school. Now Beomgyu had to explain to each and every one of them that it wasn’t him that wanted to make friends, but the other him. Gyu.
Beomgyu was boiling water for his instant ramen when he heard a knock on his apartment door. Confused, he opened the door and saw his stepbrother Hueningkai standing outside.
“Hey Gyu!” Hueningkai cheerfully waved, but his smile slowly faded when he saw Beomgyu’s grumpy face.
“I’m so sorry, I thought it was Gyu’s turn today,” he apologized profusely.
“I don't care about that, what do you want?” Beomgyu asked, shaking his head looking annoyed.
“W-well… Gyu and I were having a chat at lunch yesterday-”
”Oh god… what did he say now?”
“Nothing much, he just said he was going to give me his old hoodie today and I thought I’d pick it up…?” Hueningkai mumbled.
Beomgyu sighed as he turned around to find whatever old hoodie Gyu was gonna give Hueningkai. It was still weird to think that he had no memory of doing something his own body did. “Come on, Gyu- where the hell did you put it?” Beomgyu muttered annoyingly.
Of course there was no point in asking Gyu- they were the same person, he couldn’t just ask a question like that and also expect himself to answer. Beomgyu and Gyu can’t exist at the same time.
Soon enough, Beomgyu found a paper bag on the sofa and immediately gave it to Hueningkai so the boy could leave already.
“Thanks Beomgyu!” Hueningkai smiled at him, yet he only rolled his eyes.
“By the way- Mom wanted to ask how are you,” he added, and Beomgyu couldn’t help but scoff.
“Really? Mom giving a fuck about me? What did she eat today, is she okay?” Beomgyu asked sarcastically as Hueningkai bit his lip.
Growing up, Hueningkai had to get used to both of Beomgyu’s personalities. Personally, Gyu was his favorite to be with. He was playful, he joked around, he was great at cooking, and he was very cuddly. However, it wasn’t like Hueningkai hated Beomgyu, but he just felt so awkward and on edge around him.
When Beomgyu said he was going to move to his own apartment, Hueningkai was heartbroken. Of course he was gonna miss Gyu and Beomgyu, no matter how grumpy he was. Hueningkai wanted to move in with him but his mother got way too angry, saying he shouldn’t be even hanging around with crazy people like him.
“Well, I guess I’ll just see you or Gyu on Monday then?” Hueningkai asked quietly, fiddling with the loose thread on his shirt as he looked at the floor.
“Yeah, yeah whatever,” Beomgyu said, closing the door on Hueningkai. Abandoning his instant ramen, he went straight to his bedroom. It was too early to go to bed, but he’s had enough for today.
Beomgyu knew sleeping would mean waking up as Gyu, and giving Gyu more stupid opportunities he, Beomgyu, would have to pay for sooner or later. But he needed sleep so badly, he’s been severely sleep deprived for a week. Sighing, he closed his eyes and immediately fell asleep.
His 7:00 a.m. alarm rang loudly across the room, and Gyu couldn’t help but fall of his bed in surprise. He rubbed his eyes, observing his surroundings. “Huh, so Beomgyu went home?” Gyu muttered to himself, realizing he was in his room- more like Beomgyu’s room but oh well.
The last thing he remembered was sleeping over at Hueningkai’s house- maybe he switched back to Beomgyu while he was there. Oh no, he must've been really angry, Gyu thought- knew how much Beomgyu hated being in that house.
Gyu reached for his phone and immediately texted Hueningkai.
ME: Hey, I'm somehow at home right now- you can get the hoodie :D
KAI: Hi Gyu!!! Actually... Beomgyu already gave it to me yesterday :0
ME: ..he did?
KAI: well of course you wouldn't know lmao
KAI: you kinda fell asleep during our sleepover and woke up as beomgyu. right after he woke up he yelled at me for 15 minutes straight and stormed out of our house :((
ME: jeez... i'm so sorry about that :(
KAI: it's fine! :D
Gyu sighed sadly. He had no idea how Hueningkai was able to handle Beomgyu, but he was very thankful for being understanding and mature about it. He walked to the kitchen to cook breakfast for himself and found a packet of instant ramen on the table. Is Beomgyu really taking care of himself? He didn't even bother to eat it- instant ramen wasn't even healthy in the first place!
That was when Gyu had an idea- he ran to his room, grabbed a marker and a post-it paper, and wrote on it.
Eat your meals properly :((
-Gyu
He stick the post-it note on the packet of ramen and left it on the table. He smiled to himself- he was such a genius. There was no way he was going to be able to talk to Beomgyu because he was Beomgyu (and at the same time wasn't), but leaving post-it notes might be able to help him communicate with Beomgyu.
He was about to wash his hands when he saw the sink full of used bowls and spoons. Gyu rolled his eyes and sighed exasperatedly- how many more post-it notes did he have to write? He decided to do the favor of washing the dishes himself.
When he was finally done washing them, he started cooking breakfast. He cooked eggs, hotdogs, pancakes, rice, and yes- he was eating everything by himself. Gyu noticed how thin he became, so he assumed Beomgyu wasn't eating well for the past few days. After eating, he looked around his apartment and decided to leave more post-it notes.
Wash your dishes, for goodness's sake.
-Gyu
He stick it on the cupboard right above the sink.
Try going grocery shopping, ok? Especially fruits and veggies- there's literally nothing but processed foods in your refrigerator and you don't even cook them!
-Gyu
He stick this one on the refrigerator- he remembered wanting to have an apple this morning only to find out there wasn't a single nutritious food in the house.
Please wash your laundry. There's a laundry shop just down the street. Just- please.
-Gyu
The laundry was the worst part. Gyu saw the laundry overflowing with unwashed clothes and not gonna lie, they were starting to smell.
Lastly, he stick one last post-it note on Beomgyu's bedside table. It was weird writing these notes which were technically for himself if you think about it. Gyu was Beomgyu, Beomgyu was Gyu. They were the same, yet they were also very different. Gyu knew what Beomgyu was like, Hueningkai used to tell him stories about him. And Gyu loved Beomgyu. He knew what he went through, and Gyu wanted to make Beomgyu feel loved and important. For now, the most he could do was try and help him take care of himself and try to help him love himself.
Don't keep living like this, you should take care of yourself. You're important, and you should know that. I'm always here, literally. If you need anything, you can write back to me. I love you :D
-Gyu