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Don't you go and say what’s in your head
Or did you forget?
You ain’t ready for that yet
You don’t want to ruin what you’ve built so far
-Just Before the Moonvasion Defense Attack-
Gyro didn't ever want to have feelings for his intern.
In fact at first, the very idea of it was unthinkable to him. Why would he? How could he?
The duck was too loud. Too overenthusiastic. Too bright, too optimistic, too caring…
Too…
Happy.
Yes, Gyro was happy sometimes, usually when an experiment went right or Lil’ Bulb came and talked to him if the inventor was getting frustrated.
But it shouldn’t be physically possible to be that happy all of the dang time.
Gyro had looked into it, seen if there was some sort of strange magic or something that made it possible for Fenton to be this happy in life, to know that there was hardship out there, and to still be as bubbly as he was.
But there wasn’t.
He’d even sent Lil’ Bulb home with Fenton once to see if the duck was up to something that could make him this happy. But Lil’ Bulb came back twelve hours later having stayed up late watching movies with Fenton and talking about different types of electrical current conductors.
Gyro didn't ever want to have feelings for his intern.
But somehow, he did.
The pang of worry that came with whenever Fenton was injured in action, or called away on a potentially dangerous case. Yes, his usual worry for his inventions, but the underlying fear of Fenton getting hurt.
The small rush of happiness that came whenever the duck laughed, because his laugh was so annoyingly contagious that it made even Gyro Gearloose, the stone-hearted inventor who cared only for his robots, force back a smile.
The tiniest twinge of jealousy that Gyro had yet to admit to himself when he’d seen Fenton and Gandra’s ‘I survived my first date’ picture. Because oh gosh did Fenton deserve someone so much better than her.
Not that Gyro thought he was enough for Fenton.
Why would he ever think that? He didn’t want Fenton, he wasn’t even supposed to like the duck! Heck, Fenton still thought Gyro hated him.
And Gyro did.
Right?
Yes.
So then why was there the worry, the happiness, and the jealousy of seeing him with someone else?
He wasn’t sure, so it got shoved down with everything else he didn’t want to think about. It was all too confusing. And for now, Fenton would go on thinking Gyro hated him.
Because Gyro totally did.
So then why was he here? Why had he stopped Fenton before going out to fight the aliens? It wasn’t really to make sure the suit was ready, was it?
He didn’t know. But here he was.
“Dr. Gearloose, I really think that the suit is fine,” Fenton said as Gyro ran through the coding one last time. They’d already done some extra reflex tests. “They need me out there now.”
“Well they can wait, Intern.” Gyro replied, not looking up at him from the computer. “I need to make sure my invention can handle these aliens.”
“I’m sure it can!” Fenton jumped up from where he’d been sitting at the desk chair. “And we’ve already checked the suit seven times!”
“Six.” Gyro corrected.
It was all exactly as it had been before, everything was perfect. But still, he scanned the familiar words over and over again.
“Dr. Gearloose…” Fenton’s voice floated back to his ears. “They’re going to leave without me. They can’t fight without Gizmoduck!”
Gyro let out a breath. “Fine, I think I’m done.”
“Really?” Fenton quickly straightened up. “Blathering blatherskite!”
The suit magnetized around Fenton, and Gyro forced back a smile at how perfectly it did so. Even though he’d seen it countless times, it was satisfying to see that this one still worked. It hadn’t gone evil like so many others.
“Okay, a few last things.” Gyro’s phone buzzed, he glanced over at it. A text from Clone 11, they were going to leave any moment now. He ignored it, setting his phone face down. “Don’t overuse the ShoulderBlades, they’re still a little rusted from that last Atmotz Fear encounter.”
“I know,” Gizmoduck replied. Gyro noticed the gloved hand’s fingers twitching a little, Fenton was anxious to get going.
Still, Gyro continued. “I haven’t been able to exactly analyze the kinds of guns the Moonlanders are using, so I’m not sure how many the armor can take, so be careful on how much you get hit.”
“I will.”
“The pie production is fine, I managed to fix that bug from last time when it kept spitting pies everywhere.” The lab had been an absolute mess after that.
Gizmoduck smiled, cracking his knuckles. “I’ve got a few ideas on how to use them.”
“And I think that’s everything.” Gyro picked up his phone again, he now had messages from not only Clone 11, but 8, 4, 9 and 15. They really were leaving for the mansion now.
“Great! Let’s go!” Gizmoduck turned and rolled towards the lab door.
But Gyro wasn’t ready, this attack was happening too fast, what if he didn’t get to say a proper goodbye to Fenton? What if Lunaris killed them all?
“Intern, wait.”
Gizmoduck looked back, his tone a little impatient. “Yes?”
Shoot. Why had Gyro called out? What was he supposed to say? “Don’t-”
Don’t… Don’t what?
Don’t get hurt.
Don’t risk yourself for anyone else.
Don’t die.
Don’t leave me.
But Gyro couldn't just say that, he wasn’t even supposed to be thinking it! He wasn’t supposed to care about Fenton!
“Yes?” Fenton asked again.
Gyro cleared his throat. “Don’t forget that these aliens have no idea what they’re doing. Use that to your advantage.”
Gizmoduck nodded. “I’ll make sure to.” He turned back to the elevator.
Feeling slightly deflated, Gyro followed.
---
Don’t you show them what’s up in your mind
Now is not the time
You should never climb that high
That way if you fall you’ll only fall so far
-During Astro B.O.Y.D.!-
Gyro hadn’t been expecting to find that picture of him and 2-BO together. He’d even almost forgotten they’d even taken it.
But there he was, smiling from the cracked glass, his hand on his first invention’s back, 2-BO’s happy grin mirroring his own.
The glass had broken when 2-BO had been corrupted, the bot had knocked over the desk, splitting it down the middle. Gyro noticed that the crack ironically went right between him and 2-BO. Because of course it would.
He hadn’t meant for any of this to happen. This wasn’t supposed to have happened. But he’d been foolish for thinking that Tezuka’s blow had been enough to take the robot down. He should’ve powered it off for good.
And then that fake Mark Beaks had somehow found 2-BO and brought it back, and Gyro hadn’t found out until months later.
The realization that one of his inventions, one that had gone evil, one that had destroyed nearly an entire city, had been out in the world without his supervision, without his knowing, in fact, scared him.
But it was no one’s but his fault. He’d purposefully made it hard for anyone to trace 2-BO back to him, the bot making friends with Huey was a coincidence.
He was glad though, that Huey had thought to bring 2-BO back to him.
That way he could shut the robot down before another disaster struck. One that would be his fault again, for not finding 2-BO sooner.
He looked back down at the picture, back at his younger self. He’d been happy, back then. And hopeful, seeing the best in everything.
And stupid.
He wouldn’t make those mistakes again.
Because it had ruined him last time. He wasn’t sure he could take that again.
It was safer, this way, shutting 2-BO down. Because if he didn’t, who knew what the robot would do again. He couldn’t risk it destroying the life Gyro had rebuilt for himself since then, one as Scrooge McDuck’s number one scientist. If 2-BO were to ruin that…
Gyro didn’t know where he’d be left.
And that was just his physical life that 2-BO could potentially ruin.
The last time he’d trusted the robot terrible things had happened. What hadn’t crushed him entirely was the fact that he had to start over.
No, what had crushed him was the fact that 2-BO had been his invention. He’d believed that nothing could go wrong with it. In a way, he’d almost felt betrayed.
There was no way he could ever trust this robot again.
He touched the split glass, looking back at the past, maybe with longing. It had been easier back then. “So idealistic…” he murmured.
But what was done was done, he couldn’t keep reminiscing on it.
So down that got shoved with everything else.
“Blagh,” he tossed the picture aside, Lil’ Bulb hopping up on his shoulder as he turned back to where the others were.
“Alright. Let’s finish this and go- HEY!” He broke off, realizing first, that no one was there, and second, that there were two twin blasts in the wall.
They hadn’t even bothered to use the first hole?
And more importantly, 2-BO was loose in the city again.
“INTEERRRRNN!” Gyro screeched furiously.
Oh, that duck was so fired.
---
Why do I keep shooting at myself again?
Why do I self-sabotage in self defense?
Every time I hide the fire inside my chest
I’m only shooting at myself
Shooting at myself
-Just After Astro B.O.Y.D.!-
After flying from Tokyolk, they met up with Launchpad in Korea and took the Sunchaser (Cloudslayer?) back to Duckburg.
The flight was long, nearly twelve hours. Gyro slept for most of it, Boyd curled up in his lap, somehow asleep as well.
Okay, maybe he could trust the robot again. After all, it wasn’t Gyro’s fault Boyd had gone evil before.
It wasn’t even Boyd’s fault.
It was Akita’s.
Yes, Akita was the one to blame. He was the distrustful one.
Gyro looked down at the child in his arms, the smallest of smiles on his beak. Boyd snuggled closer with a sigh.
Gyro wondered if it was possible for Boyd to dream. He’d have to look into it once they got back to Duckburg.
Leaning his head back, the inventor suddenly felt something against his shoulder, and looked down to see a sleeping Fenton leaning against him. He was still bruised and battered from his fight against Boyd, but looked perfectly content in his surroundings.
Gyro debated shoving him off for a moment, before leaning back again and letting Fenton sleep. It’d been a long day for everyone.
Launchpad crashed outside of Gyro’s house, Fenton went in with him to help get Boyd settled. Huey was still exhausted, he stayed mostly asleep when Launchpad crashed.
“I’ll be right back,” Gyro said softly, leaving Fenton in the front room. Fenton nodded.
Gyro walked back to the guest room, Boyd still in his arms. He set the sleeping robot down on the bed, and went to straighten up when the little boy’s hands tightened in his shirt. “Don’t leave me!” Boyd squeaked.
The three small words almost broke Gyro’s heart. “I won’t, you gotta let go.”
“B-but how do I know you won’t?” Boyd looked up at him, his eyes wide, similar to the expression he’d made when Gyro had said he was going to shut him down.
“I’m not going to.” Gyro told him, trying a trusting smile. “You need rest, and to recover from whatever Akita did. We can go through your programming and get rid of all of his and Beaks’ bugs in the morning, okay? But you gotta let go.”
“Where will you be?” The fists didn’t slacken their grip.
“I’ll be in the living room or in my room, I promise.”
Boyd slowly let go, Gyro helped him climb under the covers. “You’re sure? I-I don’t want to lose you again.”
Gyro ran a hand through Boyd’s hair. “You won’t. I’m not going anywhere this time.”
The robot smiled, and leaned back. “I missed you, Dr. Gearloose.” He was half-asleep, the words coming out as he drifted off.
The inventor froze. There was really only one response to that, one that Gyro had yet to even admit to himself. Finally, he let out a breath. “I missed you too.”
And he had. Gyro realized that he had missed Boyd, buried under all of the awful memories was a longing for what used to be.
Boyd was asleep seconds later, Gyro smiled and straightened up, walking out and quietly closing the door behind him.
Fenton was still standing in the living room, looking around. “You don’t really have any pictures in here. I-I mean like, not that you have to, it’s just most people do, so it’s strange that you don’t. A-also not that you have to be like anybody else, or anything, I just thought-” he broke off. “Sorry, I’m babbling.”
“Why would I?” Gyro asked, genuinely confused.
“Well, to make you happy?” Fenton explained, a little taken aback. “Y’know, like pictures of people or stuff you love.”
“You want me to put up my framed blueprints?” Gyro asked.
“Well…” Fenton trailed off. “There’s nothing else that makes you happy? What about like… Donald or Della? They’re your friends, right? Or… Lil’ Bulb? Or your family? I saw a cat walk past…”
Gyro snorted. “That may be one of the funniest things I’ve heard you say.”
“I’m serious!” Fenton exclaimed.
Gyro looked at him, and realized the duck really was serious. “Really? There is no way I’m putting up Donald or Della, I’d be haunted by them looking at me, and they’d make fun of me for the rest of my life. And I haven’t talked to my family in ages. The cats are strays, I don’t have time to actually take care of any of them, so I just spayed, neutered, and vaccinated all the neighborhood cats, and they have food set up in here if they want it. I guess I could do pictures of Lil’ Bulb…”
But then what if it ended up like that old picture back at the lab in Tokyolk? Old and cracked, a painful reminder of what could’ve been?
“Oh…” Fenton trailed off, a look of pity on his face.
Gyro glared. “Stop making that face.”
“S-sorry! I just… What about Boyd? You could put up some cute pictures of Boyd and Lil’ Bulb on the mantelpiece over there!”
The inventor ran a hand through his hair. “No. I think- I… I’m sending him back with the Drakes.”
“What?!” Fenton exclaimed, a little too loudly. “Why? You just got him back, and-” he broke off. “Why?”
Gyro let out a breath. “It won’t be good for him here, all I do is work. He’s happier there, and has a real family setup.”
“But… he clearly prefers it with you!” Fenton told him. “I saw the way he was clinging on to you, you can’t let him go now! That’s- that’s-” he searched for the right words. “I don’t know, but-”
“Better for him?” Gyro suggested. “I can’t keep burdening him with my crap-”
“It’s not a burden!” Fenton cut him off, Gyro looked at him, startled. “I’m sure he’s wanted to get back to you for so long, don’t push him away now that he’s finally done it!”
“Don’t tell me how to live my life!” Gyro snapped. “I’m not pushing him away, he can still come see me at the lab, he knows where I work. He just doesn’t have to live with me.”
“Yes, you are.” The duck argued. “A-and that doesn’t count, he needs you as a parent-”
“He already has parents.” Gyro pointed out.
“Yes, but he wants you.” Fenton’s voice softened. “Surely you owe that to him?”
“I owe him a good, stable life. He won’t get that with me, I am not capable of giving him that. However, he will get it with proper parents.”
“But-” Fenton held a hand out, willing Gyro to understand. “But isn’t it worth a try?”
“No!” Gyro exclaimed. “I’m going to mess it up, and I really, really don’t want to. He can see me in the lab.”
“I don’t think you’re going to m-”
“Yes I am!” Gyro nearly shouted. “I’m clearly not cut out for being a parent!”
“You have Lil’ Bulb,” Fenton offered. “He turned out pretty good.”
“Intern- oh wait, I can’t call you that anymore. Fine, Doctor… Intern. Dr. Intern.”
“You could just call me my name…” Fenton suggested.
Gyro ignored him. “Lil’ Bulb tried to steal Scrooge’s car yesterday. Not sure that counts as ‘pretty good’. And… It’s different with Boyd.”
Fenton understood. “I know. But please, just try-”
“Nope.” Gyro shook his head. “I can’t. It’s not worth it. I’m done with this conversation.”
“But-”
“I said I’m done!” Gyro snapped, Fenton stepped back, startled. The inventor held a hand to his face, pinching the bridge of his beak. “Just… go away.”
“But-”
“Go away. Get out.”
Fenton looked at him, before letting out a breath. “O-okay. I-If that’s what you want.”
“It is. Go away.”
The duck walked to the door, pausing to look back at him. “Please, Dr. Gearloose, at least consider-”
“Get out.” Gyro didn’t look at him.
Fenton cast one last sad glance at him before walking back to the plane. Gyro heard it somehow miraculously sputter to life, before taking off, using his street as a runway.
Gyro sighed, flopping back down on the couch, Fenton’s words running through his head.
‘He clearly prefers it with you! I saw the way he was clinging on to you, you can’t let him go now!’
‘I’m sure he’s wanted to get back to you for so long, don’t push him away now that he’s finally done it!’
Did Boyd really want to stay with him? Was it worth risking ruining the bot's life?
...Again?
Lil’ Bulb walked over from his charger, jumping up to stand on Gyro’s knee. “What do you think I should do?”
“I LIKE BOYD,” The robot blinked.
Gyro smiled. “I do too. But we both know I can’t properly raise… anything.”
Lil’ Bulb scowled. “WHAT DOES THAT MAKE ME?!”
“You did try to steal Mr. McDuck’s car yesterday.”
“HOW ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO BURN DOWN WADDLE?”
“Just set a kitchen fire. And see? This is what I mean! Boyd can’t grow up and be a real boy if he’s trying to burn down Waddle half the time.” Gyro looked away. “He’s better off at the Drakes.”
“HE ALSO NEEDS TO BE HERE.” Lil’ Bulb blinked, reaching out to put a small hand on Gyro’s chest.
Gyro wasn’t sure if the robot was doing it comfortingly, or if he had purposely placed his hand over Gyro’s heart.
He looked at the robot. “When did you get so deep?”
“WHEN I KNEW BOYD BELONGED WITH US. LISTEN TO FENTON.”
“Why is it any of Fenton’s business though?”
Lil’ Bulb didn’t answer, just jumped off of Gyro’s leg to sit next to him, the robot’s bulb leaning against Gyro’s side. Gyro smiled. “Thanks, I-I’ll think about it.”
The robot just patted his side encouragingly.
Gyro sighed, leaning his head on the back of the couch. This was all so complicated. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to do.
Actually, scratch that, he knew one thing he wanted to do. That last, pitying glance Fenton had given him had hit somewhere weird in his heart. He wanted to change that expression, make Fenton smile.
He also wanted to be a good parent for Boyd.
So two things he wanted to do.
Though at this point, were they even possible? Was it all too far gone?
Probably.
But maybe, just maybe,
He could make this work.
---
Look around at everybody else
Then back at yourself
You ain’t got a shot in hell
Some of us are meant to play a smaller role
-Sometime After ‘Beaks in the Shell!’-
“Ohhhh Gyro darling!”
Gyro froze, whirling around,
To see Della standing in the lab behind him, smiling.
He scowled, turning back to his work. “Don’t call me that.”
“Aww, why not?” She asked, walking over to him.
He glared at her. “You know why.”
Della laughed. “Fine. It was hilarious to see you jump like that though, I should do that more often.”
“Please, don’t.”
“Whatcha workin’ on?” She leaned over the desk.
“A new kind of-” he was cut off by a crash from the bathroom. “Dr. Intern!” He shouted, turning a little to face the door. “What was that?”
“Uh… just a headset stand fell over!” Fenton called back.
“Why?”
“Um… I tripped on it?” It sounded more like a question, and Gyro could hear the ensuing muffled giggles.
The inventor grumbled something under his breath, turning back to his work. Della looked confused. “Is Gandra over?”
Gyro nodded. “She’s always over. I used to kick her out, but then that led to her sneaking back in… Now I don’t care anymore.”
“Can’t they just talk to each other over the GizmoCloud?”
“Apparently it’s ‘better in person’.” He made air quotations. “What do you want?”
Though the question sounded harsh, Della had known him long enough to know he didn’t mean anything rude by it, that was just how he spoke. “Oh, y’know, just to check on crazy ol’ Gearloose, make sure he’s not doing anything insane.”
Gyro looked up at her, adjusting his glasses. “According to most people, half the things I do could be classified as ‘insane’.”
“I’m saying what counts as insane to the Duck family.”
“Then nothing much right now.” He discreetly slipped the more detailed blueprints and plans for Operation Gyrobot Apocalypse into one of the desk’s drawers.
“Huh.”
“What do you really want?”
“To catch up! See how you’re doing-”
But Gyro could see right through that. If Della really wanted to ‘catch up’, she would do it by banging on his front door at 2a.m. to watch horror movies and do his hair. “You’re here to talk about that Moonlander soldier, aren’t you?”
“Her name’s Penny, and she’s not a soldier, she’s a captain.” Della corrected.
“Was.” Gyro said.
“Whatever. But yes! She’s officially my girlfriend now!”
Gyro looked back down at his invention. “Congrats.”
“Awww, c’mon Gy, I would’ve thought you’d give me a better reaction than that!”
“Actually, yes, I’m happy for you Dels. I thought it would be impossible for you to get a date, but I guess I was wrong about one thing in my life. Great going.”
Della playfully punched him in the shoulder. “Hah hah hilarious,” she said sarcastically. “...But do you really mean you’re happy for me?”
Gyro let out a breath. “Yes.” He eventually admitted. He knew that the topic of lovers was touchy for Della, it was nice to see her finally get a girlfriend. He’d heard a lot about Penumbra from her already, and she seemed like a person he could actually get along with.
“Woo-oo! The last person I had to convince!” She gave him a tight squeezing hug, and Gyro felt his back pop.
“Ouch! Della-”
“Oh, sorry.” She said, stepping back. “I know you’re getting up there.”
Gyro raised an eyebrow, twisting his back to pop it again. That felt better. “I’m younger than you are.”
“Pfft, by like, eleven months.” She waved a hand.
“I’m still younger than you.”
“Ah yes, young, naive, innocent…” Della said in a mockingly contemplating voice.
He glared. “Hmm, yes, well-”
“Ah ba bap.” She held up a hand. “Before you go and list all of the times and places you’ve been, remember, I’ve been to the moon. That trumps all.”
“I went to the Old West though. And medieval times- Della, I was a knight. Then there was New York in 1789-”
“Wooow. Guess what? I went to the moon! I befriended space aliens! One of them is my girlfriend! I-”
“Are there any other kinds of aliens?” Gyro asked.
She rolled her eyes. “Fair point. But I was also a knight once when Louie accidentally started the Timephoon.”
He shook his head. “Let’s call it tied, except I’m probably winning. Aren’t you going to tell me about your girlfriend or something?”
“Oh! Yes! Penny! I got distracted. Well…” She then went into a long extensive delta of her and Penumbra’s relationship so far, leading up to when they’d become official. Gyro half listened, still concentrated on what he was building.
But he found himself paying more attention at the part when Della had brought up to Penumbra the topic of dating, he wasn’t sure why. It wasn’t like he had anyone in his life he would need to take notes for right now.
Or… did he? Why was he still so annoyed at Gandra? It’d been months since her and Fenton’s first date, when she’d electrocuted him. And she’d apologized.
But he had always been one to hold a grudge. Yeah, that was why he didn’t like her. That was why he was sure she wasn’t enough for Fenton.
That was the only reason.
Della’s voice cut into his thoughts as she leaned over the desk, a playful smirk on her beak. “Sooo… what about you and Fenton?”
He squawked. “W-what? What do you mean by that?” The remark had taken him entirely off guard.
“C’mon, you two have known each other for a while now, you spend long nights here at the lab together…” she raised her eyebrows. “And I know you are the gayest person I’ve ever met. I asked Fenton once, he’s bi like me.”
“He is?” Gyro asked, sounding much more intrigued than he’d meant to. “Uh, I mean, what are you talking about? I was his boss Dels.”
She wiggled her raised eyebrows. “BuT yOu’Re NoT aNyMoRe…”
He ignored the fact. “Besides, he’s clearly dating now.” It took all of his willpower not to look back at the bathroom door.
“Yeah, but how long is that going to last? With a little prodding in the right direction…” Della trailed off suspensefully, a mischievous look on her face.
Gyro had to admit to himself, he was a little tempted, and a little interested to see what Della could do. But he didn’t want that for Fenton. He didn’t deserve the hardship of a breakup, even though the girl he was dating was a jerk and an idiot. He shook his head. “Don’t, Dels.”
“Fiiiine. But if you ever need me to, I’m here.” She grinned.
He rolled his eyes. “I know where to find you. Besides, you haven’t considered the fact that maybe I’m not interested?”
“If so, why did that sound like a question? Maybe you are interested.”
“Nope.”
“I’m not hearing a lot of evidence that you are…”
He looked up at her. “Why would I be? He’s loud, obnoxious, has way too much energy or someone who claims to not drink caffeine, he talks too fast,” -he started counting the attributes on his fingers- “he’s too excited about basically everything, he’s a terrible liar, he cares too much, his smile’s too wide, he wears his tie too loose, that little flop of hair that hangs in his face is annoying, he-” he broke off, noticing Della’s smugly quirked eyebrow. “What?”
“Hmm, sounds like someone’s got it bad.” She said, resting her chin on her knuckles.
Gyro turned bright red. “W-what? N-no I don’t!” He spluttered indignantly, incredibly grateful that Fenton was in the other room. “Did you not just hear any of that?”
She waved a hand. “Oh please, I speak fluent Gyro. And-”
“That’s not a thing.”
Della ignored him “-what that translates to is ‘he’s adorable, funny, attractive, lovingly energetic about every aspect of his life, and I’m mad he’s in love with someone else.”
“What? That is the exact opposite of everything I just said!”
“Exactly! Let’s see, how else could I prove this… If some random person were to ask you what I was like, how would you respond?”
He glared, having no idea what she was pulling him into. “I’d say you’re annoying, loud, and nosy.”
She held a mockingly bashful hand to her face. “Oh stop it, I’m blushing. See! Yet I’m your best friend!”
“Not.”
“Who is?”
“Lil’ Bulb.”
“He’s your son.”
“He can still be my best friend.”
“He can’t, because he’s your son, and I’m already your best friend and you love me.” She leaned in close. “Right?”
He met her gaze with a deadpan glared. “Nope. Hate you.”
“See! Proof right there.” She squeezed him into another hug.
Gyro let her hug him, still glaring. “I still don’t get your point. I do not like Fenton.”
“Yeah, keep telling yourself that.” Della patted him on the back. She glanced at the clock. “Well, I gotta go, I’m meeting Penny in a few minutes. Talk to you tomorrow?”
“Please no, I’m busy.”
“Right! I’ll be there.”
He knew that would be her response, and was actually kind of looking forward to it already, knowing she would come no matter what he said. However annoying she could be, he liked their conversations. “Dels, I said-”
Della tapped him on the end of his beak with her finger. “Fluent. Gyro. See you tomorrow!” She walked back towards the elevator. “Love you darling!”
He didn’t look back. “I told you not to call me that.”
“Love you, crazy ol’ Gearloose!”
No one else was around. “You too, nosy lil’ Duck.”
She laughed. He heard the elevator ding, Della step on, and the doors close. Gyro let out a suspended breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding, and rested his elbow on the desk.
Maybe Della was right, maybe Fenton wasn’t so bad. Yes, though the duck spoke too fast, and too much, his voice was nice to listen to. It was just so… automatically cheerful, it rubbed off on everyone around him. And maybe that annoying flop of hair made him a little attractive…? Gyro wasn’t sure.
But he could hear the muffled talking and laughter from the bathroom, and he sighed.
There was no way in eternity they could ever end up together.
...Not that he wanted them to.
Right?
---
Don’t you go and love with all your heart
Showin’ all your cards.
Quick before you fall apart
Leave it so you’re not the one who’s left alone
-A Month Later-
As the days progressed, Gandra kept coming around the lab less and less, until there an entire week went by and Gyro saw absolutely no trace of the F.O.W.L. traitor. He’d mentioned this to Della once, and she constantly annoyed him with little tips and hints on how to get Fenton to like him.
1:24 p.m.
DELLA: u said its been a week! why havent u asked him about it? 😤
GYRO G.: Because it’s none of my business. And that’s a weird invasion of privacy.
DELLA: no its not if u say it the right way. and it is kinda ur business, its ur lab.
GYRO G.: What do you mean by that?
DELLA: just speak in ur native Gyro tongue.
GYRO G.: I still have no idea what you mean by that.
DELLA: act completely uninterested, probably insult both of them a few times… itll work!
Read: 1:25 p.m.
3:05 p.m.
DELLA: sooo… did u try it? 😁
GYRO G.: No, I have better things to do!
DELLA: than possibly scoring the love of ur life??!!!
Read: 3:05 p.m.
5:15 p.m.
DELLA: did u do it yet?
DELLA: gyro
DELLA: gYrO
DELLA: GyRo
DELLA: GYRO
DELLA: GYRO DAHLING
DELLA: CRAZY OL’ GEARLOOSE
GYRO G.: What do you want? I’m in the middle of something!
DELLA: in the middle of telling Fenton u love him?
GYRO G.: No. Stop bothering me about that. I can’t tell him now, he’s already in a relationship!
DELLA: so at least just ask about gandra!
GYRO G.: I don’t care about Dee, why would I ask about her?
DELLA: because u do care. u care that shes stealing ur man!
GYRO G.: Cabrera is not ‘my man’, actually, he still thinks I hate him.
DELLA: he spends a lot of time around u, he may speak a little gyro. enough to know that u dont hate him. and if he does, at least just tell him you dont!
Read: 5:17 p.m.
5:31 p.m.
GYRO G.: Fine, I’ll do it. But ONLY to get you to stop bothering me.
DELLA: YAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY
DELLA: GOOD LUCK!
DELLA: come to think of it, gyro gearloose-cabrera doesnt sound that bad… 🤔😏 neither does fenton gearloose-cabrera. or cabrera-gearloose? no, gearloose needs to go first.
GYRO G.: DELLA
GYRO G.: I’M JUST ASKING HIM ABOUT HIS GIRLFRIEND
GYRO G.: NOT *PROPOSING*
DELLA: i know. but hey, small steps, right? 😁😘
“Who are you talking to?”
Gyro jumped with a squawk, he hadn’t realized Boyd was reading over his shoulder. He quickly turned his phone off and put it in his pocket. “The red nephew’s mom,” he said quickly.
“Della?” Boyd asked. “I like her, she’s always super fun. What were you talking about?”
“Oh… just some… experiments.” Gyro told him, not exactly lying. He quickly changed the subject. “Are you ready?”
“Yep!” Boyd said enthusiastically. “I dropped all of my bedtime stuff off at your house, and came back here!”
“Good job,” Gyro smiled. “And you’re sure you’re fine with hanging out with Lil’ Bulb and Manny while I finish up here?”
“Yep! Manny wanted to show me how he does his hair without any hands.”
“...He does his hair?” Gyro asked, surprised.
“Yeah, sometimes.”
“Okay, I’m done at six.”
“Got it!” Boyd exclaimed, giving Gyro a hug and dashing away after Manny, who was standing not far off.
As if on some sort of cue, Fenton walked past, looking incredibly tired. “What’s up with you?” Gyro asked, an eyebrow raised.
The duck yawned. “Late night last night.”
“Doing what?”
Fenton paused, rubbing one eye and looking back at him. “Cleaning. It’s my M’ma’s birthday today, I wanted the house nice for her. And I baked a cake.”
“...At midnight?”
“Yeah, I would’ve done it today but I had work.”
“Dr. Intern, if it’s your mother’s birthday or your birthday, just take the day off!” Gyro told him, surprised he’d come in that day. “Just call me and tell me!”
“Really?” Fenton asked, perking up a bit. “But… I thought you’d be mad!”
“It’s her birthday, for heaven’s sake.” Gyro said. “God knows with her insane hours she deserves it. Take the day off. And take your own off too.” He paused, then added as an afterthought, “Also your mother scares me a little, so I feel obliged to give you the day off so I don’t get strangled or arrested.”
Fenton chuckled. “Okay, thanks, Dr. Gearloose. Does that mean I can go home now?”
Gyro waved a hand. “Yeah, sure.”
“Yay! Thank you!” He grinned. “We were going to watch some of her favorite telenovelas and eat the cake and ice cream.”
The inventor rolled his eyes. “You should've just told me this morning.” He glanced back at the bathroom door. “Is your girlfriend here?”
That seemed to put him down a little, he frowned. “O-oh, no. She’s at some convention in Cape Suzette.”
Gyro looked at him, sure there was more to the story than that. “...And?”
“A-and we’ve been kinda strained lately.” He hung his head, running a hand back through his hair. “We haven’t actually talked in a while, we’ve both been busy, and honestly… we’re blaming each other for it.”
“Oh.” Gyro said, not sure how to respond to that. His heart leapt, and he scolded himself. Fenton was sad, he couldn’t be happy about this.
...Maybe not happy, but he was hopeful.
He quickly gathered his thoughts and pressed the necessary ones back down. “Well, then yes, take the rest of the night off.”
Fenton’s smile returned. “Thanks! You’ve got it here with Boyd?”
“Yes, I do, he’s my son.” He waved a hand, turning back to his work. “Now get out of here, Dr. Intern.”
The duck ran over and gave him a quick hug. “Thank you, Dr. Gearloose!”
“Yeah, yeah, get going.” Gyro stiffened at the hug, surprised by it. Fenton didn’t notice though, gave him one last ‘thank you’, and darted to the elevator.
Once the doors closed, Gyro looked back at them, a smile slowly spreading on his beak. He picked up his phone.
5:36 p.m.
GYRO G.: He says they’ve been strained for a few weeks.
GYRO G.: And he was sad when I brought her up.
DELLA: HA HAAAH YES WE ARE *SO* DOING THIS, BABY! im coming over tonight so we can scheme. *laughs in glomgold*
GYRO G.: You can’t, I have Boyd this week.
DELLA: oh that’s right, youre doing that shared custody thing. i dont get why you dont just actually become his guardian. fine, im coming at eleven tonight 😈
GYRO G.: Don’t be late.
-Two Days Later-
Gyro tapped his foot nervously, running a hand through his hair to brush it out, getting rid of any tiny imperfections. He glanced at the clock, it was 9:18.
Finally, after waiting an agonizing two minutes, he pulled out his phone.
9:20 a.m.
GYRO G.: Where are you?
DR. INTERN: Sorry Dr. Gearloose! I got stuck in traffic, and I forgot the suit at the lab yesterday so I can’t use it to fly there.
DR. INTERN: I’ll make up for it.
DR. INTERN: Sorry.
Gyro bit his lip before answering, not sure if he should say this.
GYRO G.: It’s okay. I understand.
DR. INTERN: Really? I’m sorry, again. Want me to get you a coffee to make up for it?
GYRO G.: No! Then you’ll be even more late.
DR. INTERN: Sorry.
Gyro put his phone back in his pocket, glancing back in the desk drawer that the flowers were still there.
He and Della had been planning this for the last two days.
This was it.
Maybe.
He would bring up the topic of Fenton and Gandra again, and if it wasn’t great news, then he’d slowly let Fenton know that Gyro…
Well at this point, Gyro didn’t really know what he felt. But… he wanted to be there for Fenton. He wanted to be the one to make him smile, he wanted to get more hugs. To even deserve more hugs.
...And maybe kisses?
He’d realized this after Fenton and Gandra had revealed their relationship to everyone, along with the GizmoCloud. Seeing Officer Cabrera talking so kindly to the F.O.W.L. traitor, even after she’d electrocuted both him and Fenton, gotten the lab destroyed, and betrayed him to Beaks and F.O.W.L. had made him livid and jealous, so strongly that he had to admit to himself that he was jealous of Gandra.
And with that admission he’d also realized that he did have a… deep regard for Fenton. Della insisted on saying that he ‘loved’ Fenton, but Gyro wasn’t so sure he was ready for that word yet.
L o v e.
Something about the word felt huge and daunting, so much more than he thought. So he was sticking with ‘a deep regard’. Those were easier words.
After a ten minute stretch that felt like an eternity later, the elevator dinged and Fenton came running in. “So sorry! There was a small accident on the highway, no one got hurt but the traffic was backed up a ton-”
“It’s fine,” Gyro cut him off early, before he could go on about it for forever.
“Really?” Fenton asked, a little surprised. “Usually you’re mad.”
Gyro cleared his throat. “Well, um, yes. Usually I am.”
An awkward silence.
At long last, Gyro spoke. “Oh, I was wondering how it was going with… Ms. Dee, you appeared sad last time we talked about her.”
Fenton’s look of surprise grew. Gyro usually never cared about his coworker’s feelings, or at least, he appeared not to. “We still haven’t talked since four days ago.” Fenton told him. “Thanks for asking.”
Gyro tried not to show how excited he was, he clenched his fist to suppress his feelings. “Oh… My condolences.”
Now Fenton was extremely surprised and confused. This was the most sincere he’d ever heard Gyro talk to him. “O-oh, it’s okay. It’s not your fault. It’s ours.”
“But still, I know you made each other happy.”
Fenton’s jaw dropped that time. “Dr. Gearloose… with all due respect… Why do you care? This isn’t usually how you react. T-to, any of this. Are you feeling okay?”
Gyro waved the question off. “I feel fine,” incredible, in fact. “And, I wanted to tell you something.”
The duck tilted his head a little, curiously. “What is it?”
Oh shoot. This was it. He knew he had to word this correctly, but his mind was going blank. He grasped at the few thoughts remaining. “Well, I’ve wanted to for a while, and-”
He was interrupted by Fenton’s phone dinging, the duck quickly pulled it out, glancing at it. “S-sorry. What was it?”
“Who’s that?” Gyro asked, a little suspicious.
“O-oh! Gandra.”
One word.
Two syllables.
Gyro’s hope plummeted, he froze, stiff as a board, unable to think.
“A-anyway, Dr. Gearloose, you were saying?” Fenton asked.
Oh yeah. He was saying. Maybe it wasn’t as bad as he thought? Gyro continued. “Right. I’ve been wanting to tell you the reason-”
Fenton’s phone dinged again, and again, a split second later. “Sorry! Gandra again.”
Gyro was now very annoyed. “What does she want?”
“Um… to apologize for not talking in a while. She says she’s headed back to Duckburg.”
All of Gyro’s hope not only plummeted, then fell through three stories before somehow falling out the window, leaving him entirely. So this wouldn’t work.
Fenton looked up at him. “But contin-” he was cut off by three more texts on his phone.
Gyro sighed. How did Gandra text that fast? “Whatever. I-it doesn’t matter.”
“Oh.” Fenton looked more confused than ever. “But-”
The inventor cut him off. “It’s fine. Just answer her and go away.”
“Oh… sorry.” Fenton looked at him, and Gyro could tell he really meant it. “Are you sure-”
“Yes, I’m sure. Now I have work to do, just answer he-” he was cut off by another ding.
“I mean I can silence it-”
“No,” No. The damage was already done. What he would say was already rendered invalid. “It doesn’t really matter.” He turned back to his desk.
Fenton nodded. “O-okay. Well, good morning then. I’ll… go answer this.”
“Good morning, go away,” Gyro didn’t look up at him. He heard Fenton walk away, and sighed.
Well that was a total flop.
It was his fault, he’d gotten his hopes too high. He slowly closed the drawer with flowers in it (it was faulty and somehow always drifted back open), and pulled out his phone.
9:36 a.m.
GYRO G.: It didn’t work.
GYRO G.: They’re still pretty close.
DELLA: awww, im sorry, gy.
Read: 9:37 a.m.
Gyro swallowed the lump in his throat and put his phone down. He glanced over at Fenton, who had a slight smile on his beak as he answered the texts. Gandra was clearly texting back, and one point Fenton giggled.
The inventor glanced down at the blueprints on his desk, holding back a sigh. He should've seen this coming. He’d bee idiotic and naive for thinking that he and Fenton could end up together.
And way too hopeful. He’d never been one to get his hopes up too high, but the one time he’d dared, they’d been smashed back down.
Looking back at Fenton, he vowed to not care that much about the duck. They were merely coworkers, nothing more.
That was it.
They always had been, and they always would be.
So why did it feel like a huge loss?
9:41 a.m.
DELLA: u ok?
Read: 9:41 a.m.
10:18 a.m.
GYRO G.: No.
---
Why do I keep shooting at myself again?
Why do I self-sabotage in self defense?
Every time I hide the fire inside my chest
I’m only shooting at myself
Shooting at myself
-Two Weeks Later-
In the two weeks that followed the ruined love deep regards confession, Gyro was much more cold towards Fenton than usual. It wasn’t as bad as it had been back before Tokyolk, back when Fenton was just ‘intern’, but it was close.
Still, interestingly enough, Gandra didn’t come around.
Gyro, on his part, spent all of his time working on a new project (a coffee cup that could warm to the exact temperature you wanted it to be), and hardly paid any attention to what Fenton was doing. If Fenton noticed, he didn’t say it, or not in a way that Gyro heard him.
Until the day the project was finished (after several failed attempts with one that turned evil), and suddenly Gyro had nothing to keep his mind off of Fenton, or use to ignore the duck.
That day Fenton came in late, this time over an hour. He looked exhausted, his eyes red with dark circles beneath them. Gyro demanded why he was so late, and the duck answered quickly with a ‘I woke up late and there was traffic’ excuse, before hurrying off to his bathroom lab, out of Gyro’s sight.
Well, that had been odd. Gyro looked after him, tempted to call out and ask what was up. But he shrugged.
He wasn’t supposed to care about Fenton anymore.
And Gyro didn’t hear a peep out of him until lunch, when the duck grabbed his pre-packed lunch from the break room and left to go eat it outside. Which wasn’t that weird, Fenton did that all the time, but he seemed rushed, and not wanting to be in Gyro’s company.
What was going on? Gyro hadn’t done anything too terrible lately, he hadn’t actually yelled at or insulted Fenton in a week (which was, in itself, a record).
So why was Fenton so eager to avoid him?
It wasn’t anyone’s birthday, was it? There were no surprise parties, were there? He checked the calendar in the break room while he ate his sandwich. Nope, nothing for a while.
When Gyro walked back into the lab he noticed the bathroom door was shut again, meaning Fenton was back already. He shook his head and walked back to his desk. This was too confusing, and he wasn’t supposed to care.
At three o’ clock, Gyro still didn’t see or hear Fenton at all. Finally, he stood, walking to the bathroom door and tapping on it, checking to make sure the duck wasn’t dead or something. There would be a huge lawsuit on Gyro’s hands that he wouldn’t want to deal with if he was. “Dr. Intern? What’s going on?”
There came a startled squeak, and a rustling of something. “N-nothing, Dr. Gearloose! Just… working on the GizmoCloud!”
Gyro didn’t believe that for a second. “Are you sleeping on the job?”
“What? No! Of course not!”
A silence, where Gyro debated turning and going back to his desk. Fenton said he was fine, so why did Gyro care? After all, he’d already promised himself he wouldn’t get sucked back into this.
But something pressed him forwards. “Can I come in?”
“U-uh… It’s a little messy…”
Well, that wasn’t a no, so Gyro pushed the door open.
When Fenton had become Gyro’s coworker, Gyro had allowed the duck’s inventions and plans outside the stall, and since then, his lab was now the entire bathroom. There was a nicer one with a shower in the back, so this one was never used as an actual bathroom, and was just Fenton’s workspace.
Fenton was right, the floor was covered in different plans and blueprints, the Gizmoduck armor was heaped in one corner next to several computers.
Opposite that corner was Fenton, curled up with his back against the wall and his knees to his chest. Gyro looked around. “What happened in here?”
Fenton stood. “I-I haven’t cleaned it in a while, and I tripped on a stack of paper earlier this morning and knocked a bunch loose, sorry, I wasn’t planning on having anyone in here.”
Another pause, while Gyro surveyed the mess and Fenton looked incredibly uncomfortable. Gyro looked over at him. “What’s up with you?”
“W-what do you mean?” Gyro didn’t miss the way Fenton started at the words.
“You’ve been acting weird all day.” Gyro told him. “And you look terrible.”
Fenton frowned. “Thanks. I-I’m fine, I just didn't get much sleep last night.”
“Still doesn’t explain why you’ve been avoiding me all day.” Gyro stepped farther into the bathroom, the door shutting behind him. “Why were you up?”
“I haven’t been avoiding you all day!” Fenton defended. “I-” he broke off, realizing he had.
Gyro raised an eyebrow.
Fenton ran a hand through his hair. “I-I don’t know. I’m sorry. I’ve been tired lately, and I didn’t sleep last night-”
“You’ve said that three times now. What’s going on?” His voice turned a little harsh, annoyed that Fenton kept ignoring the question.
“N-nothing of consequence-”
“Dr. Intern, you and I both know you’re a terrible liar.”
Fenton stepped back, hugging himself. “I know. I’m just really tired.”
“...Why?” Gyro asked for the second time.
Fenton walked back further, his eyes no longer on Gyro, more at a random spot on the floor. “I- we-” he stammered.
Gyro took a step towards him, now a little concerned. “What?”
“Gandra and I broke up last night!” Fenton exclaimed, bursting into tears as his back hit the wall. “I-I didn’t want to tell you because I know you don’t care, and I didn’t want to annoy you. And I knew I would cry when I told you and I didn’t want to cry like this in front of you and now I feel silly because I know you don’t care so to you it looks like I’m making a big deal out of nothing, when-”
Gyro was surprised at the reaction, to say the least. He cut the duck’s rant off. “Wow, um, first, I don’t think this is nothing.” He walked towards him.
Fenton looked up at him, his eyes still full of tears. “Y-you don’t?”
“Well, I guess if it means this much to you then it can’t be…?” Gyro said, a little hesitant to voice his exact thoughts. He was afraid to empathize with Fenton, he didn’t want to start caring again. But it was hard not to.
The duck slipped down the wall, back to his earlier position. “Well now I feel even more stupid-” he broke off with a sob.
Still surprised, and a person who had very little experience with trying to comfort people, Gyro sat down against the wall next to him. “Well, uh… Don’t. I-I know romantic relationship stuff can be hard…”
Oh boy did he know it.
But that surprised Fenton a little, he looked over at Gyro. “You do?”
Gyro frowned, some of his empathy disappearing. So Fenton hadn’t even noticed. But whatever, it wasn’t like Gyro was trying to make it super obvious, in fact, he’d been trying to hide it for a while.
It wasn’t Fenton’s fault.
“Yes, I haven’t been lonely all my life.” Gyro snarked, slightly offended.
“S-sorry, I-I just never really thought you were the type.” Fenton said. “B-but thanks. We’ve been rocky for a while…”
Gyro just silently sat back, attentively waiting for Fenton to continue.
Fenton did. “It started about a month ago now… We kinda stopped seeing each other, we were both super busy with our jobs, Gandra just got one under Zan Owlson, Gandra’s trying to distance herself from F.O.W.L.. A-anyway, during that I heard a rumor that she had a girlfriend, so I asked her about that. S-she said she didn’t, and got mad at me for doubting her faithfulness. S-so, we didn’t really talk much after that.
“That one day when I was late and she kept interrupting our conversation was when she got back from St. Canard, we went out that night and she apologized for getting mad, and I apologized for doubting her. It was nice to actually talk for the first time in a while, it was… refreshing, almost. I thought it would get better after that…” He trailed off, lost in thought.
Gyro just waited for him to continue.
Finally, the duck shook his head, clearing the memories. “But it didn’t. W-we still couldn’t see each other much, and then the GizmoCloud started glitching again. We were fixing it one day and she got frustrated and snapped at me, she blamed me for one of the bugs, which I’m still pretty sure was left behind by Beaks. That was last week, and we didn’t talk after that until she just called me last night to say she was sorry and that she’s done.”
“Oh…” Gyro said. “That seems a little sudden.”
“It was. Kinda. I just feel like I should’ve seen it coming, the way we were going.” He let out a breath. “A-and the worst thing is, I checked her social media account this morning and… she does have a girlfriend.”
Gyro scowled. “What? So she was lying?”
“Y-yeah,” Fenton buried his head in his knees, his shoulders shaking with sobs.
Gyro sat there quietly, waiting for him to let it out. He wasn’t really sure how to comfort the duck, so just settled on staying close to him.
“I’m sorry,” Fenton whispered after the sobs had stopped. “It’s just hard to lose someone like that…”
Gyro knew that all too well. “I know. I’m sorry.”
Fenton wiped his eyes with his fist. “Don’t be, it’s not your fault.”
Yes, but I can still be sad that you’re sad.
The words rose to Gyro’s tongue, but he bit them back. He wasn’t supposed to be caring right now, he could not get sucked back into this.
It would only end with more disaster and heartbreak.
Fenton looked like he wanted to say something too, but then eventually turned away, looking out at the messy bathroom. They sat in silence for a moment, and surprisingly, it wasn’t awkward. Gyro didn’t really see it as companionable either, they were just… sitting, and content with each other.
Eventually, Fenton broke the silence. “Thank you, Dr. Gearloose, for sitting with me. It means a lot. And thanks for not being mad.”
Gyro was caught a little off guard. “O-oh, of course.” That’s when he remembered he wasn’t even supposed to be here. “Uh, hope you feel better.” He stood. “Well, I have… stuff to do.”
“Oh, yeah.” Fenton sat up more. “Thank you, again.”
The inventor nodded. “No problem. Feel free to go home, if you want to.”
Fenton offered a small smile. “Thanks. I should probably clean this place up though.”
Gyro looked around at it. “Yeah, you probably should. See you later, Dr. Intern.”
The duck stood. “Bye, Dr. Gearloose! I’ll get it cleaned up in here. Thank you.”
Gyro turned and walked out without a backwards glance.
Once outside, he let out a breath, trying to compose himself.
That shouldn’t have happened. It wasn’t supposed to happen. Gyro couldn’t care anymore. Even if Gandra was gone, Gyro was sure Fenton would find someone better, someone nicer.
He’d missed his chance a long time ago.
And he just had to accept that.
He walked over to his desk, sitting down, trying to take his thoughts off of Fenton, and on to a new project.
---
I don’t wanna wait for the right time
No I can’t wait, gotta go
I don’t wanna watch from the sidelines
No I can’t watch anymore
I don’t wanna wake up and realize
I spent my life inside my head
-Five Nights Later-
In the days after Fenton had told Gyro that he and Gandra had split up, things only got worse.
Fenton was still evidently very sad, though he made an effort to talk to Gyro sometimes. Gyro would talk to him only when he had the time.
Only when he was sure he could keep his emotions in check.
Gyro had had Fenton as his intern for a year, then his coworker for six months. In all of that time, no matter what Gyro said to him, no matter how much he’d put the duck down for being too happy, he’d never seen Fenton this sad.
It was a little unsettling, actually, to go an entire day at the lab without seeing a single smile from Fenton.
And Gyro wouldn’t allow himself to fix it.
He couldn’t get close again. He wouldn’t let himself.
He managed to convince himself that he didn’t want to. Why would he care? It wasn’t up to him what his coworker did, and he had nothing to do with Fenton’s life outside of work.
But why did he still always try to think of ways to make Fenton smile again?
That night he couldn’t sleep, tossing and turning. He usually found sleeping on his stomach helped, but that did nothing. Finally, he rolled over and glared at the ceiling, like it was the reason he couldn’t sleep.
“Why are emotions so stupid?” He asked aloud, to the empty space in front of him.
He’d tried to suppress them. They only got in the way, made it so he couldn’t concentrate, made it so he couldn't sleep.
Kind of like Fenton.
He grumbled at that thought, rolling onto his side, arms crossed, almost pouting. This was incredibly annoying.
But he knew from experience that he just had to wait it all out. The emotions would eventually fade.
That, for some reason, sent a jolt of fear through him. He found, deep down, that a part of him didn’t want to stop caring. He wanted to smile when Fenton smiled, he wanted to feel bad when Fenton felt bad.
It was the part of him that had called out to Fenton before the Moonvasion, not wanting him to leave. The part of him that had missed Boyd. The part that still wanted Della to come talk with him, even if she could be annoying.
It was a part most people would call their ‘heart.’
It was a part that he’d been suppressing for a long time now.
And it was sick of it.
Sick of waiting, sick of watching.
It wanted to do something .
Gyro sat up, leaning against the headboard, looking out the window next to his bed as he thought. He couldn’t care about Fenton again, he wouldn’t let himself.
But he wanted to. He wanted to so badly it almost hurt.
It could’ve been so easy, back there in the bathroom, to reach out and put a hand on Fenton’s shoulder, tell him he felt bad. Tell him he cared.
So incredibly easy.
But he’d missed it. He’d held himself back.
What if another opportunity like that presented itself, and he suppressed his heart again?
...What if Fenton found someone worse than Gandra?
(Though, granted, was that even possible?)
Or, what if, Fenton never found someone, and ended up alone, when Gyro had been right there, longing, for years?
Oh crap, could Gyro really stand just not caring for years?
No. He couldn’t spend the rest of his life like that.
So eventually, he boiled it down to this:
Confess the feelings that he was still trying to squash down and deal with those consequences,
Or try to get Fenton fired so Gyro wouldn’t ever have to deal with him again.
The second one was incredibly tempting, Gyro already had at least three ways to do it.
But then… that would make Fenton sad. And did Gyro really want that?
He found that he didn’t.
So, with a sigh, he turned to the first option.
Which actually didn’t sound that bad.
He just had to get those feelings out there in the world. They’d been quiet for a long time, and they were going to eventually burst out of him out of control if he didn’t do something about it.
And honestly, it sounded a little exciting. Because…
...And Gyro knew he shouldn’t get his hopes up…
...But what if…
...Fenton felt the same way?
The thought made him smile. But he couldn’t get his hopes up, he wouldn’t allow himself to.
But Fenton had to know how he felt now.
Gyro started out of his bed, reaching for his glasses and putting them on. He quickly brushed his hair, grabbed his phone, and started out the door.
1:03 a.m.
GYRO G.: I know it’s late, but there’s something I really want to tell you.
GYRO G.: Can I come over?
DR. INTERN: It’s kind of late, but I’m still awake. Sure, my M’ma’s not here though, she has a late shift.
GYRO G.: Excellent. I’ll be there in a few minutes.
Why do I keep shooting at myself again?
Why do I self-sabotage in self defense?
Every time I hide the fire inside my chest
I’m only shooting at myself
Shooting at myself
Gyro pulled up outside of Fenton’s house, the street dark and void of people. There was one street lamp, but it had apparently burned out.
He paused for a moment, suddenly realizing this was crazy. Showing up at his coworker’s house past midnight to tell him he was especially affectionate towards him? He was sure he hadn’t been thinking straight.
What was he talking about? Of course he wasn’t.
On the drive over he’d realized the only one he’d been hurting by holding back this information was himself. Everyone else wasn’t affected by this at all. And if he told Fenton, it would be letting it out there.
It would make it so much easier for Gyro if Fenton knew.
Yes, it would be awkward at first, but it would eventually just drift away.
It wouldn't though, if he kept it to himself.
Like an untreated wound, it would only get worse and more painful.
He stepped outside his car, walking up to Fenton’s front door. He let out a breath, giving himself one last chance to walk away.
But he didn't want to.
He gathered his thoughts and knocked.
Fenton answered a few seconds later, in his pajamas as well. His face lit up when he saw Gyro. “You made it! Come on in!”
“You seem… happier than I would've expected.” Gyro said aloud as he followed Fenton inside.
Happier than he’d seen Fenton in days.
“Oh, yeah, sorry.” Fenton closed the door behind him. “I… couldn't sleep and wanted someone to talk to to get my mind off of it. So you showing up was perfect!”
“How do you have so much energy?” Gyro asked him, confused.
“I don’t know. I haven’t really done much today, I guess… What was it you wanted to tell me?”
Yeah, that.
Gyro swallowed.
“Well uh…” how would he start? “Can we sit down? It… um… feels awkward just to stand here.”
“Uh, yeah!” Fenton walked over to the couch, Gyro following and sitting down facing him.
“Well, I tried to tell you this before, but… we were interrupted.” Gyro said. “And… I’ve wanted to for a while. But… I don’t really know how to phrase this.”
“Oh…” Fenton tilted his head. “What is it?”
“Um.. well…” Shoot, this was it. The big moment. The thing he’d been thinking about for weeks. “I… really care about you, Cabrera.” He said Fenton’s last name, not sure if he was allowed to say his first. “Like, a lot. To the point where some people might say I like you.”
“Oh. Well, I like you too!”
He said it in such an offhand way that Gyro was sure Fenton wasn’t thinking the same way Gyro was. “N-no, like, I have a deep regard for you. I… Like you, like you?” Ugh, that sounded terrible.
Fenton looked confused. “You… love me?”
“No. Yes.” Great, this was going horribly. Gyro found himself rambling, something he only did when he was nervous. “I mean, yes, I do, I guess? I don’t know, that word just sounds like a lot… It’s, the right word, I guess… But a big word. And I know this is right after what happened with Dee, and I’m not assuming you’ll like me the same way back, but… I just needed to tell you. And this doesn’t have to go anywhere, I just need you to know that… I really like you, and-”
“Hey,” Gyro was thankfully cut off by Fenton moving closer and putting a hand on his knee. “I understand.”
Gyro looked up at him, his face burning. There. It was out. He’d done it.
But he still needed to see Fenton’s reaction.
The duck continued. “I get it. And… I guess I’ve felt the same way for a long time too.”
“Really?!” Gyro exclaimed, extremely taken aback. “But what about Dee-”
“I did love her too. But… that clearly didn’t last long. I… Liked you first, though. I just assumed you hated me.”
“I never hated you.” Gyro said quietly. “At least, not really. You just remind me of myself, and that kind of scared me. Because… well, you know how I turned out.”
“Brilliant, funny, and caring?” Fenton asked, sounding confused.
“What?” Gyro was even more surprised. “I mean rude, impatient and arrogant. And… I’ve treated you horribly.”
“Not really. You could’ve been worse. You could’ve actually fired me.”
“I tried. Several times. Scrooge just re-hired you.”
Fenton smiled. “You still gave me a chance. Lots of them. And, after learning what you've been through, I’m proud of you for that.”
“Really?”
The duck nodded. “Yes, Dr. Gearloose.”
“If we’re doing this, just call me Gyro.”
Fenton’s smile widened. “Only if you call me Fenton.”
That earned a grin. “Deal.”
A pause, while they tried to think of something to say.
Finally, Fenton spoke. “So… what should we do now?”
“I don’t know, I didn’t plan any farther than telling you.” Gyro admitted. “But… I would really like to figure this out.”
Fenton scooched a little closer, taking Gyro’s hand. “Me too.”
---
I’m only shooting at myself…
Shooting at myself…
-Four Months Later-
Fenton walked into the bedroom, his arms ladened with snacks. “Are you ready for this?”
Gyro looked up. “Did you get black licorice?”
“You bet.”
“Then yes.”
The duck jumped onto the bed next to him, nestling the snacks around him. “Alright, Harry Parrot movie marathon here we come!” He picked up the remote, turning the TV across from them on. “I still can’t believe you’ve never watched these.”
“I still can’t believe you thought I ever did.” Gyro shot back, pulling out a licorice rope. “When would I?”
“Fair point,” Fenton said. “It’s just surprising, they’re so famous everyone assumes everyone knows what it is.”
“I know what it is,” Gyro said. “But I haven’t watched it.”
“They’re books too, you could read the books.”
“No way.”
Fenton laughed, kissing Gyro on the cheek. “Fine, I guess I’ll just have to tell you all the ways the movies got it wrong.” At least he’d been able to convince Gyro to watch it with him, though with much licorice bribing.
Four months into their relationship, Fenton still wasn’t entirely sure what their relationship was. They were dating, but not really officially. They were incredibly close, but Gyro had yet to say the words ‘I love you’. Sure, Gyro would say ‘you too’ when Fenton told him he loved him, but the chicken still hadn’t actually said them.
Which Fenton was fine with. Gyro had said when they’d confessed to each other that it would take him a while, he wasn’t used to this.
Fenton knew Gyro loved him. Though the inventor didn’t say it in his words, he said it in the way he made Fenton tea in the mornings (Fenton didn’t drink coffee), in the soft little ways he would touch Fenton, in the ways he would be excited to do projects together, always asking Fenton’s opinion on whatever they were working on.
As the opening song started, paired with the Harry Parrot logo, Fenton grinned. He was excited to share this with Gyro.
Gyro had quite a lot to say about the Dursleys, constantly commenting on how terrible and stupid they were (though Gyro found Harry stupid too). He didn’t like Draco, and unsurprisingly, Hermionie was his favorite character, or ‘the only one with common sense.’
Halfway through the movie, Gyro started up a little. “Wait, this is like, some sort of mystery? We’re trying to find out how Voldemort got into the school?”
“You’re not supposed to say his name!” Fenton teased. “And yes.”
“I’ll call him what I want, he’s not real. But why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve been trying to figure it out! It’s not Snape, though.”
Fenton grinned as Gyro leaned back against him. “What makes you say that?”
“The story wants us to think it’s him. He’s a red herring. It’s someone else. Also, it can’t be him because I like him. Is it that old guy?”
“Dumbledore?” Fenton asked, surprised.
“Yeah, the super old guy with the long beard.”
The duck shook his head. “No, Dumbledore stays good the entire time.”
“Hm…” Gyro took another piece of licorice.
Gyro figured out it was Quirrell moments before it was revealed, and felt smug for the rest of the ending. When it was over, Fenton looked at him. “So… what did you think?”
Gyro nodded. “Pretty good, better than I expected. Is the next one a mystery?”
“Oh, definitely. There’s a secret chamber in this one, you have to find out where it is and who opened it.”
“Voldemort opened it.” Gyro stated.
Fenton laughed. “Well, obviously, but he used someone, like how he used Quirrell in this one. You have to find who he used this time.”
“All right, let’s bring it on.”
Gyro figured out that Tom was Voldemort pretty quickly, but he was suspicious of Dobby being the one to open the chamber. When it was revealed to be Ginny, he was completely taken aback.
So it went on, until Gyro eventually fell asleep at midnight, around movie four, the Goblet of Fire.
He was nestled next to Fenton, head near Fenton’s heart, Fenton had an arm around him. Gyro’s hand was on Fenton’s stomach, his leg over Fenton’s.
Fenton grinned. Gyro didn’t ever deny Fenton physical contact unless it interfered with whatever he was doing. He didn’t usually offer it, either, and when he did, it was small, like a hand on his shoulder or leaning against him. If it was anything more than that, he only did it for a moment, as if afraid of overstaying his welcome.
So to have Gyro tucked against him, peacefully asleep, made Fenton’s heart swell. Fenton kissed him on the forehead, bringing his hand up to run through Gyro’s hair.
The inventor sighed, shifting a little so his beak was against Fenton’s neck. “I love you, Fen…” he murmured, incredibly softly. Clearly more asleep than awake.
Fenton’s heart jumped.
The first time Gyro had said it.
He committed the sound to memory, never wanting to forget the first time Gyro had said those words. “Love you too, Gyro.”
Fenton couldn’t see Gyro that well tucked underneath his beak, but he was pretty sure the chicken smiled.
Thirty minutes later, Fenton fell asleep as well, both of them perfectly content and happy.