Chapter Text
#general-1
September 4, 2028
7:03 AM
boyfriend material: first day of school :/ what if i just dont
Dick: Yeah :(
monch :))): DICK
boyfriend material: DICK
Rob Petrie (Polly): DICK
nick: DICK
laura petrie: DICK
Dick: What
monch :))): just glad ur here, ly bestie <3
Dick: <3
laura petrie: @ seniors september 1st 1989
nick: not even waiting for the first show to start with the heathers references i see
laura petrie: >:)
#schappenings-school-happenings
September 4, 2028
7:37 AM
nick: HELLO @ boyfriend material
nick: MILES EDGEWORTH IN TRIG??????
nick: @ boyfriend material MILES EDGEWORTH??????
boyfriend material: i thought he died
nick: YEAH
boyfriend material: necromancy. happens to the best of us bro
nick: if i ask where hes been for eight years is that weird
Rob Petrie (Polly): Who??
nick: Me and Larrys fifth(?) grade friend who we havent seen since then
Mom Friend (Mia): The lawyer kid?
nick: Yeah
Mom Friend (Mia): I am sending him psychic waves telling him to join the debate club
nick: NO
boyfriend material: DEBATE CLUB JAIL
nick: DEBATE CLUB JAIL
Rob Petrie: DEBATE CLUB JAIL
#debate-club-jail
September 4, 2028
7:51 AM
Mom Friend (Mia): Debate club is good you guys
boyfriend material: shakes the bars of your cage. dance for me you silly little monkey
Mom Friend (Mia): Kills you
#general-1
9:04
SCIENCE!!: what lucnch do u giys hae
laura petrie: hang on guys i speak ema. she is asking what lunch ee have
dick van: ee have
Rob Petrie (Polly): Ee have
boyfriend material: ee have
monch :))): ee have
laura petrie: @ Rob Petrie (Polly) bullied by my own husband :((((
laura petrie: anyway first
Rob Petrie (Polly): This is so sad. I have second
laura petrie: good >:(((
SCIENCE!!: tgank fuck i have seco,d
laura petrie: >:O
SCIENCE!!: see u never gayboy
laura petrie: i wish youd mess up gayboy just once
2:19 PM
boyfriend material: one minute to freedom
boyfriend material: when are auditions btw
boyfriend material: @ Mom Friend (Mia)
monch :))): shes still in debate jail
monch :))): but theyre the 18th
boyfriend material: i guess she has served her sentence
#debate-club-jail
2:26 PM
boyfriend material: i am unlocking your cell door
Mom Friend (Mia): I am going to make a plea. Watch your back, Butz.
boyfriend material: WHAT
Mom Friend (Mia): And then I disappear into the shadows
boyfriend material: FEAR
#general-1
September 8, 2028
4:19 PM
Dick Van: Does anyone want to meet up at the arby’s by the walmart and get dinner tomorrow. like a little back to school party before the show starts and we have to meet all the new freshmen
laura petrie: yeah sure
laura petrie: kristoph says he can pick up two ppl if you guys need rides
Dick Van: Yeah and my uncle can take one more
Rob Petrie (Polly): What Athena doesn’t tell you about her uncle is that hes actually the scariest man alive
Dick Van: HE’S JUST GOTH
Rob Petrie (Polly): Im right
Mom Friend (Mia): Maya and I can come
boyfriend material: i need someone to pick me up
nick: you drove us to the park last week?? i thought you had your own car and everything
boyfriend material: i got in an accident and got my license suspended for reckless driving
nick: AGAIN???
nick: also are you ok
boyfriend material: yeah im fine but i do want to go to arbys
nick: you live literally next door ill get you
September 9, 2028
11:54 AM
nick: @ boyfriend material so i thought i could take you but i was in fact wrong
boyfriend material: hhhhhhhhhhhhh dude i want sliders
boyfriend material: @ Dick Van is your uncle still open
boyfriend material: @ Dick Van please my time-sensitive sliders
Dick Van: Yeah we can get you at like four?? i think i know your address. If i don’t i guess it will just have to be a little adventure
boyfriend material: coolio
7:48 PM
boyfriend material: so something i didnt realize was that when apollo said athenas uncle was the scariest man alive is that he did actually mean it
Rob Petrie (Polly): YEAH
SCIENCE!!: @ Dick Van when he walsked u ove r to thea table i felt the temperaature drop at leavst 10 degrees
boyfriend material: also credit to gumshoe for literally never being active on the discord but coming to all the events
laura petrie: king of lurking
Dick Van: My uncle is a NORMAL HEALTHY GOTH
#dick-van-dyke
11:32 PM
laura petrie: @ Dick Van WHERE IS IT
Dick Van: NO HANG ON OH N O
Dick Van: Dick Van Dyke Show Weekly Fact #14
Dick Van: Ritchie Petrie appears in only 7 out of 32 episodes of the final season.
laura petrie: my darling richie
Rob Petrie (Polly): My darling richie
Dick Van: Richie my beloved <3
#schappenings-school-happenings
September 11, 2028
7:13 AM
nick: every time i walk into trig in the morning and see miles edgeworth a part of my brain explodes
nick: @ boyfriend material
Dick Van: He’s in my psych class and he’s actually terrifying
Dick Van: He never offers to answer questions but when he gets called on he always knows the answers
Dick Van: Which isn’t why he’s scary, but. BAD VIBES
boyfriend material: nick dude have you TALKED to him
nick: no
nick: maybe i will whos going to stop me
boyfriend material: yourself apparently
8:46 AM
nick: hes also going to stop me
nick: trig ended and i thought i would talk to him while he packed up his stuff because it was all still out
nick: but he was up in like two seconds and he basically ran down the hallway
nick: maybe i can try before class
#actual-show-stuff
September 12, 2021
6:48 AM
Mom Friend (Mia): They’re up :)
Rob Petrie (Polly): The sides?
laura petrie: why is this a lie why are the sides a lie >:O
Mom Friend (Mia): Not the sides, the posters
Mom Friend (Mia): The sides are still printing I will have them out soon
Mom Friend (Mia): Seeing Klavier sprint down the hallway in his boots with the three inch soles is the funniest thing though
laura petrie: ITS HOT YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND
Rob Petrie (Polly): You dont even need big soles youre already too tall
laura petrie: everyone is so mean to me
Mom Friend (Mia): Apollo you can come in the printer room with me :) Klavier can’t because he said I wasn’t hot when I’m actually the hottest person alive.
coffee boy i love you: That’s the truth.
Mom Friend (Mia): <3
coffee boy i love you: <3
laura petrie: wait thats not what i meant dont sick diego on me
coffee boy i love you: You spelled sic wrong. That or your tiny brain just doesn’t understand how to use words to make sentences, which I suppose is more likely.
laura petrie: YOU KILLED ME IM DEAD
laura petrie: the sides arent going to be out before class starts are they
Mom Friend (Mia): The sides aren’t going to be out before you have class. I don’t have a first hour.
laura petrie: im gonna commit a crime
#announce-mints
7:32 AM
Mom Friend (Mia): Klavier isn’t allowed to audition for an acting role
#not-fun-drama
7:34
Rob Petrie (Polly): Not sure if this is the right place but what happened
laura petrie: i didnt know grossburg was gonna be in there with her
Mom Friend (Mia): He was the one printing the sides!
Mom Friend (Mia): Klavier ran in and stole some of the sides and Grossburg wasn’t happy about it
Mom Friend (Mia): He can still do tech though!
laura petrie: that is so much responsibilityyyyyyyyy
laura petrie: my only skill is being hottttttttt
Mom Friend (Mia): I guess you’ll have to learn some new skills
#general-1
September 15, 2028
1:41 PM
boyfriend material: mckenna <3
Mom Friend (Mia): HA
boyfriend material: dont laugh at my girlfriend shes wonderful :(
Mom Friend (Mia): Do it faster Phoenix this is a threat
boyfriend material: do what. what
#het-prison
1:42 PM
boyfriend material: what
boyfriend material: you cant do this to me i tried :(
Mom Friend (Mia): Hang on
Mom Friend (Mia): Tried what?
boyfriend material: also who gave you mod powers but took away mine this is a crime
Mom Friend (Mia): Tried what, Larry
boyfriend material: to like men
boyfriend material: it didnt work
nick: mia you were there when we were doing make larry bi speedrounds right????
Mom Friend (Mia): Hang on this is a story I need to hear in person. I will meet you after school.
boyfriend material: nickyyyy
boyfriend material: did you do this to me. did you strip me of my power
nick: yeah but only because its funny
nick: also because mia should have been a mod this whole time
nick: she has the brain cell
nick: you can come out once you pay me back for lunch
boyfriend material: fine
#dick-van-dyke
4:25 PM
Dick Van: Dick Van Dyke Show Weekly Fact #15
Dick Van: While The Last Chapter was the last episode aired, The Gunslinger was the last episode filmed.
laura petrie: another great one
#actual-show-stuff
September 16, 2028
SCIENCE!!: wao are u guys aiditioning for
nick: harry because im unoriginal
boyfriend material: harry because im so incredibly original
Mom Friend (Mia): I’m auditioning for Annabel! What about you, Ema?
SCIENCE!!: also annabel
SCIENCE!!: youd make agood annabel though
monch :))): im doing rita
monch :))): Mia im pointing at you and going HAHAHA TYPECAST
Mom Friend (Mia): You’re just mad because I’m better than you.
boyfriend material: miaya back at it again with those SIBLING INSULTS
monch :))): Larry i will eat your spine
boyfriend material: my spine :((
Mom Friend (Mia): Diego’s doing Toy
boyfriend material: @ everyone MIA TYPO
Mom Friend (Mia): fuck you
monch :))): Toy
laura petrie: Toy
SCIENCE!!: Toy
nick: Toy
Rob Petrie (Polly): Toy
Dick Van: Toy
Rob Petrie (Polly): Diego is typing shit fuck oh god
nick: rip us!!!!!!
Mom Friend (Mia): Get them babe <3
boyfriend material: diego scarier than athena’s uncle confirmed
coffee boy i love you: I want you all to picture something for me.
laura petrie: yes sir mr armando
coffee boy i love you: We’re at states.
coffee boy i love you: The set is all up.
coffee boy i love you: We all hear the announcer from backstage tell us our time begins.
coffee boy i love you: Then you wait.
coffee boy i love you: The lights don’t come up. And do you know why not?
laura petrie: why not mr armando sir
coffee boy i love you: because fuck you that’s why
Mom Friend (Mia): I love you so much
coffee boy i love you: Love you too.
coffee boy i love you: Also, Mrs Petrie?
laura petrie: hes gonna get me again im gonna die
coffee boy i love you: You’d do well to remember you’re married. That’s all.
laura petrie: h