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Katuski Bakugo opened his eyes slowly, as if emerging from a dream, wincing as the sun pierced his eyes. Everything was so bright around him, and he could hear the birds.
Was he in heaven?
He was met with Mineta throwing himself violently on him, pain shooting up his spine. He groaned loudly, throwing the short thing onto the floor.
“BAKUGOOOOOO, WE’RE SO GLAD YOU’RE ALIVE,” Mineta sobbed, his voice ringing in Bakugo’s ear. As if he wasn’t nearly hard of hearing already. “OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO SCARYYYY!!”
Definitely not in heaven.
He looked around the room, being met with the tired eyes of Sato and Sero. The rest of his classmates hung around the door of his room looking defeated and sad. Bakugo looked down at his hands, bloodied and bruised, hooked up to an IV. He was very clearly in the hospital.
Was he wearing a hospital gown?
Every part of his body was in pain. If he didn’t know any better he’d have thought he was in hell. Having the damn Grape kid toss himself onto him like a cannonball was as close to hell as he ever wanted to get. His head felt feverish and the room spun as his memory slowly came back to him.
He jumped in front of what seemed to be a million spikes. For Deku . His life flashed before his eyes- everything went by so quickly. He’d remembered how worried he felt knowing that Deku would continue to break himself until Shigaraki and All For One was destroyed. He saw Deku’s eyes glow the brightest green he’d ever seen in his life and it utterly terrified him. Who was that maniacal boy he was fighting alongside? What happened to the weak and timid boy he’d grown up with? Bakugo saw the shell of the boy Deku used to be and it scared him so bad he didn’t even think twice. He had no thoughts. He remembered the times he’d bullied him throughout their life, and still, the thought of Deku dying sent a chill through his blood. What the hell would he do without him?
He saw the spike heading straight for Deku’s heart and he beat him to it. The spikes went right through his middle. Blood shot out of his mouth and for a second he thought he was dead. All he could see was Deku’s eyes go black with fury, and everything was green in that moment.The scene was so bloody and graphic, Bakugo could barely remember if it was a dream or not.
The pain in his side was too much, and he knew everything had been real.
“Where’s Deku and Todoroki, Sensei, Senpai, and Endeavor…?” Bakugo said with unease. The looks on his friend’s faces didn’t give him any sense of security. His stomach churned nervously and his face was drained of all blood.
“WHAT HAPPENED TO EVERYONE?!” Bakugo shouted. His voice cracked from the pressure he felt was pushing onto his chest.
When there was another silence, he saw by his friends forlorn faces that it was his cue to get the hell out. To go somewhere, anywhere but his damn hospital room. He had to find Deku. He had to see that he was alive . His heart beat unevenly. Pain shot through him with every footstep but he had to know. And pain never stopped Katsuki Bakugo.
But two pairs of hands did. Bakugo was only 4 feet out the door, ready to find his rival when Sato and Mineta came up behind him and held him back.
“Stop Bakugo, if you keep moving around you’re gonna die!! They told you not to move around too much!!” Mineta shouted, yanking Bakugo’s gown.
“SHUT UP!!! DAMN DOCTORS WON’T KEEP ME IN MY DAMN BED!!” he fumed, practically foaming at the mouth, dragging Sato and Mineta along with him.
“Seriously?!! This guy just won’t stop!!” Sato shouted.
Damn straight.
“If that idiot dies, I’ll kill him.” Bakugo grunted through gritted teeth.
“Guys help!! He’s going feral!!” Sato shouted. Jiro, Ochacko, Iida, and Tsuyu ran out of the next room, and blocked their way. Tsuyu bound Bakugo tightly with her frog-like tongue, but he still fought with all his might. No way was he going to be kept away from him by these damn extras that didn’t even see what happened between Deku and Shigaraki. They didn’t know the weight of the issue. It was a pressing matter, and they didn’t even see, dammit.
“DEKU, YOU DUMBASSSSSS!!! WHY AM I AWAKE BUT YOU’RE STILL ASLEEP?!” Bakugo felt his lungs from the lack of air he was receiving but he knew that if he screamed loudly enough, Deku was bound to hear him. His heart beat erratically in his chest, anxiety racing through his bloodstream. There was so much he wanted to tell him. So much he had to let him know about. He had a feeling that Deku wasn’t in the best shape, so he needed him to know.
Damn nerd better be alive…
Bakugo’s boundless energy knocked him out completely, and his friends placed him back in his bed, shutting the door behind them. Everything went dark after that, and he was in and out of consciousness for nearly 5 days due to his blood loss.
The very classmates that held him back felt awful for keeping him out of Deku’s room. They felt bad, knowing that they had such a complex history together. They had felt like they’d done both of them a favor but they didn’t anticipate the effect that that barrier between them had created. Because now Deku was awake, processing everything, asking for Bakugo and questioning his whereabouts and they finally had nothing to say for themselves.
Who were we to deprive two friends of comfort? They thought.
Upon hearing about Bakugo’s unconscious state, Deku asked to be alone in his room. He cried for hours. Nothing could make it better. Shigaraki was being overtaken by All For One and was out there all alone and scared, his teachers were barely hanging on, and his childhood friend was comatose. There was nothing he could do. He just sobbed for hours. His friends were on the other side of the door, utterly guilt ridden and unable to console him.
Bakugo was in a dreamlike state for so long, he could barely perceive time anymore. The days felt like years. He could hear brief conversations in his room, but he couldn’t make out any voices. He tried opening his eyes many times, but he was just so damn tired. He just wanted to sleep . But every time he drifted back to sleep, all he saw was green lights and blood. He only felt pain. Pain from being impaled, pain from being unable to know whether Deku was alive or dead. He was too tired to think any longer, so he succumbed to the dark shroud of sleep that draped over him.
-
“D’you think he’s gonna wake up soon?” Bakugo heard Kirishima say. His voice was muffled, but he could make out the voice. His eyes fluttered beneath his eyelids. He was in his room. Who was Kirishima with?
“I dunno...I hope so...it’s been 5 days now that he’s been unconscious.”
Oh. Sero was here too.
“I hope he’s okay...the nurses have been poking and prodding him for a while. I hear Midoriya’s been asking for him, too.” Kirishima said worriedly.
Bakugo’s eyes shot open immediately, 100% alert. He sat up with a jolt, sending Kirishima and Sero to their feet with alarm.
“Deku?! Where is he?!”
“Hey, man! Good to see you’re finally up!” Kirishima said cheerfully, going in for a high five. Bakugo swatted his hand away.
“Where is he, Kirishima?! Damn bastards wouldn’t let me see ‘im! TELL ME WHERE HE IS!!!” he said through his teeth, grabbing Kirishima by the shirt.
“He’s down at the end of the hall, Bakugo! Take a breather, you literally just woke up!!” Sero said.
The blond fireball shoved Sero to the side as he protested. “DAMMIT, TAPE HEAD, I WON’T HESITATE TO FUCKING BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF IF YOU DON’T LET ME THROUGH!!”
That shut the two of them right up, and Bakugo took that as his cue to get the hell out of his room.
He walked with purpose through the hospital hall, determination and fury filling his head. If he was pissed off during battle, he was mad now. Thousands of thoughts went through his head at the speed of light, but the only thought he had at that moment was finding Deku alive. He passed by a waiting room, and out of the corner of his eye he spotted jumbled colors of blue, green, brown and purple hair. He stopped in his tracks, turning around immediately. The group that held him back were all sitting together, guilt written all over their faces.
“Hey, assholes!” He said harshly. “LOOK AT ME!!”
They slowly met his fiery gaze, one by one. They had never known his anger first hand. Their insides trembled.
“WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU GET OFF, HAH?!” Bakugo’s face burned red, and he felt a headache coming on. He had to get a grip or else he’d wind up back in his hospital bed.
“You have no idea what happened out there in that battlefield. You weren’t there. But Deku and I were right in the middle of it all. It was fucking messed up. I thought he fucking died .” his voice was a hoarse whisper, and as calm as he sounded, he’d never sounded so scary.
“We’re sorry, Bakugo...we had no idea…” Ochacko said quietly, as the others stared at the floor.
“Yeah, you’re damn right. You’re all lucky I didn’t kill you.” He smiled through the tears welling in his eyes. “I heard Deku is alive. If I woke up from that damn coma and he was dead, oh boy, you would all be in your graves right now. Consider you bastards lucky. Don’t fucking mess with me ever again.”
Turning on his heels, he exited the waiting room with steam coming off of his skin. He felt so worked up, he had to rest against the wall. He felt his heart beating rapidly, a weight on his chest, a lack of air in his lungs. He slid to the ground and let the tears flow freely down his face. All the feelings that he’d kept bottled up since the battle was starting to come out. He felt like he couldn’t breathe.
“I hear Midoriya’s been asking for him, too.” the words Kirishima spoke echoed in his memory. He wondered how long Deku was asking for him. How he was doing. If he was okay at all. Hurt at all. He just had to know.
He dusted himself off and wiped his face while heading for the room at the end of the hall. He placed his hand on the doorknob, bracing himself and expecting the worst. He held his breath as he took a rushed step inside.
Nobody was in the hospital bed.
Sheer panic came over Bakugo, and a million questions entered his mind at once while he scanned the room for any sign of Deku. The bed wasn’t made, his school uniform was in a pile on the chair next to his bed, and his hospital gown was in a heap on the floor. His stupid yellow backpack was even gone. When the sound of wind caught his attention, he looked toward the window. It was...open?
“What the fuck ?”
A mop of messy green curls and a pair of big green eyes popped over the side of the window. There Deku was, frozen in his tracks, and hanging over the ledge by his hands. His eyes widened, blinking repeatedly as if to see if he was hallucinating or not.
“Kacchan?”
“DEKU WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!?! GET BACK UP HERE, DAMN NERD!!” Bakugo shouted, rushing over to the window to help Deku back over the ledge. After a bit of struggle, Deku stood safely in the room again.
“Damn, Deku, what are you eating to get that heavy?!” Bakugo teased, sitting on the foot of the bed.
“It’s all muscle, you know…” Deku muttered. His eyes drifted to Bakugo’s face. He looked tired. Deku wondered how long he’d been conscious for. His heart beat softly- he’d never been so glad to see him.
Silence grew more by the minute, and the two sat next to each other, trying to figure out what to say to the other. There was so much to say, but they didn’t know how to say it.
“So, how long have you been awake, Kacchan?” Deku asked quietly.
“Like, five minutes.” Bakugo’s heart rate was still sky high as he remembered storming into the waiting room. “I tried coming to see you 5 days ago, but those damn extras held me back. Probably thought I’d kill you or something.”
Deku laughed gently, lines forming around his eyes. “I know you wouldn’t, Kacchan.”
He blushed, heart still beating erratically. “How long have you been awake, nerd?”
“Um...I’ve been awake for 2 days…” Deku looked away from him, feeling a weight in his chest.
“Damn…” Bakugo was quiet, in deep thought for just a moment. Fuck it , he thought.
He gently pulled Deku close and wrapped his bandaged arms around him in a tight hug, squeezing with all his strength and taking him by surprise. Bakugo rested his head in the crook of Deku’s neck. He smelled like cheap hospital soap and apples. It was nice . He didn’t even pull away to process what he was doing- he’d spent way too long withholding his emotions from Deku to care anymore. He just wanted to do what was right in the moment, and damn it, this was right.
“Kacchan, what are you doing?” Deku whispered, hugging back tightly.
“Huggin’ ya. Shut up and take it.” Bakugo said.
They laid like that on the hospital bed, holding each other tight for so long the morning sun had begun to set. Deku was the first to let go, once he heard sniffling.
“I was so scared, Deku. I thought you were going to die out there...then I got impaled and woke up in this damn place. And those bastards wouldn’t let me see you,” Bakugo cried, clutching his shirt in his palms and his tears soaking through the fabric on his neck. “I thought you were dead. I was so scared to lose you, damn it.”
One minute, Bakugo felt the soothing motion of gentle circles being drawn on his back. The next, he felt large tears on the shoulder of his gown. He slowly pulled away to see Deku crying.
“Why are you crying, damn nerd? It’s not like you almost lost someone you cared about…” he said in a voice just above a whisper, wiping both of their eyes with his sleeve.
“Kacchan,” he said, almost taken aback by Bakugo’s ridiculous statement. He gazed deeply into his fiery red eyes, just like he did when they were kids. “ I was so worried about you. I almost lost you . Of course I almost lost someone I cared about.”
Bakugo’s breath hitched in his throat, hooked on whatever he was feeling in his chest. He loved to look in those deep sea green eyes when they fought, and he stared deeply into them, wanting to preserve this moment in time, totally uninterrupted. He wanted to keep him close. He didn’t want anyone to get him again. He wanted him safe. Bakugo knew Deku was strong, that much was obvious. But he couldn’t bear the weight of seeing him get hurt again. It was too much.
Tears lazily spilled out from his eyes as he traced Deku’s cheek with his finger. Bakugo’s lip quivered from crying. Deku’s bright green eyes shimmered with tears and they quietly overflowed onto his cheeks. He brought his hand up to Bakugo’s red face and held his cheek and rested his hand on his middle.
“Does it hurt, Kacchan?” he whispered, voice shaking.
“No, not right now.” Bakugo replied, his voice trembled. “I’ve missed you so much, Deku.”
“Yeah. I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too…” Bakugo’s voice trailed off and caught a glimpse of Deku’s lips.
He did really care about him, and he knew from experience that life is short. He dragged his finger down to Deku’s bottom lip. It felt soft. Bakugo slowly leaned over, and kissed it gently. He felt a jolt as his green haired rival deepened the kiss, inhaling the intoxicating scent of caramel and their childhood. Before battle, there’d be no way that he’d admit his feelings for Deku. But now, everything was different. He never wanted to lose him.
The taste of mint toothpaste and tears mingled together as they kissed, softly inviting the other in to taste what they had to offer one another. It felt like they were children, eager to have each other in their spaces, not wanting to be apart. They closed every gap, and pressed themselves firmly against one another, wanting to make up for lost time for fear they wouldn’t get the moment ever again. To them, the world was lost. Deku’s tongue brushed against his teeth, and Bakugo utterly devoured his mouth. He was overcome with emotion as their tongues swirled together to make such a beautiful mess. They kissed and cried together- it was the most vulnerable thing either of them had ever experienced.
They pulled away from each other to breathe in the sight of each other, and they stared at each other with amazement. Red eyes had never been more fiery, and green eyes had never sparkled like the ocean so much.
“Deku, I have to ask,” Bakugo said between breaths, propping himself up on Deku’s chest. “What the hell were you doing hanging out of the hospital window?”
“Oh, well, you see…” Deku’s eyes were red from crying, and his voice began trembling again. “I’m leaving, Kacchan.”
“Y’know, you could have just called your mom. Here, let me do it.” Bakugo said, reaching for Deku’s cell.
“No, I mean, I’m leaving U.A….” he said quietly, avoiding his eyes.
What the fuck?!
“What? Tell me you’re kidding.” Bakugo got up slowly and backed away from him.
“Kacchan, I’m not kidding.”
“Why the fuck are you doing this?!” Bakugo’s mind ran a mile a minute, trying to understand what the hell was going on. He couldn’t comprehend anything.
“While I was in a coma, I was in the Vestige world, and I spoke with all the predecessors of One For All. I have to preserve my power and go into hiding because it’s the only way that it can get stronger. All For One is after me now. I need to hide, and make One For All stronger. Then, I can save Shigaraki and defeat All For One.” Deku explained, tears running down his cheeks.
He tried to get Bakugo to understand, but it was futile.
“Damn it, Deku!! I just got you back!! And now you want to leave?!” Bakugo’s voice shook with fear, the pain in his abdomen slowly returning. He fell to his knees, and Deku promptly followed suit. He sobbed into his hands, hiding his face. “Deku, you can’t leave me!!”
Deku’s eyes were heavy with tears, and his chest hurt. “I don’t want to leave you, Kacchan, I-”
“You don’t understand...I jumped in front of those spikes to save you !! And now you want to run back into danger??!!! I told you not to go playing hero by yourself, dammit!!” Bakugo banged his fists onto the hard floor, splashing in the small pool of tears. His voice cracked violently, and Deku’s heart curled in agony.
“Kacchan. Look at me. ” Deku’s voice was alarmingly soft for the situation, making Bakugo look up at him, despite him wanting to avoid his eyes. He saw tears streaming down his face, never stopping, always flowing.
“I care about you so much it kills me to do this. I want to protect you at all costs . I want to protect our class, my mom, your family.'' His voice was so serious, it made Bakugo quake. He’d only heard him speak like this a handful of times, and that’s when he knew he meant business. But even though his voice was serious, his eyes were soft.
Bakugo took a deep breath and steadied his breathing. Silence filled the gap between them. The room felt cold and empty. Deku watched him carefully, and stared while Bakugp stepped a little closer, grabbing his scarred hand. He watched as his childhood friend traced circles on the back of his palm. He stared thoughtfully back at him, with all the care and love he could muster.
“ Fuck ...this fucking hurts, Deku. You’re killing me here.” Bakugo said, pulling him close into another tight hug. “Fucking promise me you’ll come back to me. I don’t want to be as scared as I was this week, ever again. Got that?”
Deku held him close to his chest so that he could feel Bakugo’s desperate heart beating a rapid beat of morse code that said, ‘Please don’t leave me.’
“Got it, Kacchan...I’ll get stronger, and I’ll beat All For One. I’ll be back before you know it. Okay?”
“Fuck no, damn Deku. This is the new plan. You’re gonna go do your thing, and you’re gonna call me if you get into any trouble. I’m fucking with you . And while you preserve your power, I’ll train my goddamn ass off at U.A. and when I get strong as all hell, I’m gonna find you and we’re gonna kick that damn baldie’s ass into oblivion. Then I’m taking you on a proper fucking date. Okay?”
“Okay, Kacchan, I like the sound of that.” Deku cried into Bakugo’s neck, listening to his gentle sniffles, holding him close to his heart until the bright morning where he slipped away without a trace, leaving him a note that said:
‘I’ll come back to you soon. Call you if I’m in trouble. Love you.’