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Colors explode to the night sky, bright and beautiful and warm at the beginning of a new journey in a new year.
They're just a little bit like the one beside him, Hidenori thinks.
Bright. Beautiful. Warm.
He's burning his way up slowly into Hidenori's heart--the one that he thinks already been burned up by the one he loved (oh, the past tense still hurts him)--and he stays there. A constant present, making him feel complete, making him feel like he can do things well, that he is whole.
Unlike the love he felt before--that one makes him feel chasing for something, something he couldn't even define anymore after years of chasing, until the one thing left is only a last, short message.
(and that too, had been erased.)
He peeks to his side--he can't look at him directly when he's too aware of his feelings, like right now--and he sees sparks, he sees hope. Those golden eyes lit brightly, not only by the colorful sparks of lights, but also by the justice he always held close inside his heart. It's definitely more blinding than the fireworks they are watching from the balcony right now that Hidenori can't even spend one more second just peeking at him.
Both of them are aware that this means something, that both of them will be spending maybe the rest of their lives together under the same roof with unanswered proposal lingering behind them, and just now Hidenori thinks that it's not fair to him. It's not fair to Masayoshi, who might've felt jealous of several messages he sends (not to cope, not anymore, it's more of a way of learning to let go) but never pestered him enough to stop.
Masayoshi understands him, and Hidenori thinks it's not fair for the one who's loved by the entire world and even extraterrestrial creatures to choose this--being besides him on the first day of the new year, and maybe next year, and the year after that, too--when Hidenori himself can't even give a decent answer to his proposal that time.
Maybe them finally living together now is enough, but it still feels not fair for him.
He feels Masayoshi moves, so he glances at him, and then he sees Masayoshi smiles and maybe he feels a little bit light-headed.
"Happy new year, Goto-san."
He almost chokes on his anwer when he replied, still feeling so full, so complete inside, but he manages to say, "Happy new year to you too," without a stutter, so that's a win.
That smile's still there.
... he really wants to make it fair for him.
"Hey, Masayoshi," he tests out, carefully, slowly. "Are you sure that this is what you want?"
Feeling doubt at the first day of the year, what a way to start the journey.
"What do you mean, Goto-san?"
"This. ...us."
"Oh," he blushes a little, and Hidenori really wants to hug him if not for his lingering doubt and queasiness. "I'm actually feeling way more than just happy right now, Goto-san."
"You do realize what us living together implies, right?" he's saying this not only to start what he's about to say, but also because he knows that, often times, Masayoshi is just too dense for his own good.
When the said dense man gasp slightly and told him that no, he doesn't, what can it meant besides both of them living under the same roof, he just sighs.
"It means that the first thing I see when I wake up is you," he starts with mumbles. Oh well, better just go for it. "It means that when we ran out of toilet paper, we remind the other to buy some the next time we go shopping together. It means that we'll be having dinner together from now on, and we'll be discussing it every night even though it will be mostly end up with curry rice."
Masayoshi starts to open his mouth to reply, by Hidenori holds his hand in front of him.
"...it means that I said yes," he begins to smile, crooked a little at first. "Yes, I'd marry you."
Then Masayoshi jumps into his arms with delight, and fireworks appear not only literally but also figuratively when Hidenori takes the hero's lips on his, he knows that this year will be more than fine.
.
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.
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