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“Tony? Oh my God, where are you? What happened? Tony?”
Tony heard the voice of his lover through the thick fog in his lab. He coughed and tried to make out the form of Steve who had been chilling on the couch on the other side of the room, when the weird artifact that he had been analyzing had suddenly gone off. Yes, it went boom, and no, he hadn’t done anything to it. They had found the small horse shaped statue in one of Hydra’s abandoned labs on a routine mission.
JARVIS had been running some scans and that had been all. Tony had learned his lesson to keep his hands to himself when he’d been turned into a frog a while ago. The last time something like this had happened, Thor had lectured them all for an hour not to touch any magical stuff that found its way into their realm, asgardian or not. And Clint would never let him live the humiliation down that he had video proof of Frog Tony eating a fly. Frog Tony with a goatee to boot.
“Steve? I’m over here! Are you okay?” Tony stood up from his workbench and stumbled through the blue and gold fog, following Steve’s voice. “J, can you please open some windows to get rid of that fog?”
“I would advise against that, sir. My scanners show that whatever floats in the air is of unknown origin and perhaps magical.” J suggested. His AI sounded as unamused as Tony about the magical fog in the tower. “But I can assure you that it seems to be non-toxic.”
“Well, at least something… Steve, I’m coming over, please don’t move. I got a lot of unfinished projects in here, can’t have you crash into one of them.”
Tony slowly made his way over to where he assumed Steve was and after another moment he saw his face through the fog. He looked a bit deranged, his hair was sticking up in funny angles and his eyes were wide open. Tony was instantly worried. Their hands found each other through the blue and gold mass and… Had Steve always been that tall?
“Are you okay, sweetheart? You were pretty close to that statue, and I thought… Steve, did you- did you have a growth spurt in the last ten seconds?” Tony tried to touch his lover’s face, and sure, he’d always been the little spoon in their relationship but now Steve was more than a head taller than him.
“What are you talking about? Tony, are you okay? You are so small? And… and your lab looks weird! Did something happen to my eyes?” Steve turned his head around a few times, looking around the room like a panicked chicken.
Tony tried to catch his lover’s chin, Steve’s eyes were wide open and he looked slightly distressed. “Hey, Steve, I didn't do anything! Can you look at me, Steve?”
“I- I cannot not look at you, Tony! I can see your face and my butt at the same time!” Steve looked really flustered now and Tony was getting nervous by the second when Steve squirmed and something behind him crashed. He heard something that sounded weirdly like… clopping?
“Steve, Steve, hey, calm down, big guy!” Tony let go of Steve’s arms and laid his hands on his waist instead, trying to pull him into his arms, but Steve wouldn’t budge. And then his hands found something that was definitely not Steve’s beautiful butt. Tony stilled, looked down and through the slowly clearing fog he saw-
He wasn’t really sure what exactly he saw.
“Steve… I think we need to call Thor.”
Tony needed coffee, black coffee, or wodka. Maybe even both. This was going to be a long night, and it was only dinner time.
.oOo.
“Steve, come one, this is the most spacious elevator in the tower! Shove your big butt in there!”
“I can’t! Tony, I’m too big for the elevator! Aren’t there stairs? I’ll just take the stairs!”
“Horses can’t climb stairs, you stubborn mule! And now stuff your booty in there and play tetris with your legs!”
Tony braced himself against the equine butt of his boyfriend, always careful so he didn’t get a tail or a hoof to his face. They were standing in front of the elevator and had tried to get Steve the centaur into the damn elevator cab for eighteen minutes straight. Thor was talking via magic - Tony shuddered - with his mother about their little problem , Clint was still laughing behind them and Natasha was taking videos with her phone, while Bruce was busy reading JARVIS’ scans of Steve’s new body.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Tony!” Steve turned around to face him, even though it was not necessary. Google had revealed that horses were capable of seeing nearly 360 degrees at one time, but Steve still ‘looked’ at them, just for the sake of it. He appeared to have picked up more equine characteristics than just the obvious, including horses’ reservations regarding small spaces.
“Captain, forgive me, but thou leave me no choice.” Thor, having finished the talk with his mother, appeared next to Tony’s side and put both hands on Steve’s butt. Tony frowned at him, but kept his mouth shut. One push later and Steve was standing in the elevator.
“Thanks, buddy.” Tony patted Thor’s shoulder beneath the lumberjack shirt he was wearing. They had brought Steve one of those too, since he seemed to have lost his clothes when he’d changed from Tony’s hot boyfriend to Tony’s hot centaur… boyhorse? Horseboy? Centaurfriend?
Wow, he really needed a drink.
Tony hopped into the elevator to hold Steve’s hands when the doors closed behind them. Steve was skittish and turned his head around nervously. His hooves were clanking on the metal floor of the cab.
“Shhh, calm down, big guy. It’s okay, I’m here, you’re not alone. Shhh…” Tony reached out and stroked over his claybank horse body. The fur was silky and smooth, and Tony could feel the strong muscles shift beneath it.
Centaur-Steve was beautiful. His human body morphed into the horse’s at his waist. Just beneath his belly button, where his happy trail would’ve been, began the fur. It had almost the same color as his hair and his hooves were a bright brown shade. His caramel colored tail swished around nervously, and Tony petted his equine shoulder carefully so the sound wouldn’t startle him further.
“I want out Tony, I feel constricted.” Steve leaned down so his face was close to Tony’s. He rubbed his nose over Tony’s ear and pulled him into his arms to hug him.
The brunet felt horrible to see his beloved so stressed out. He knew he shouldn’t have examined the magical artifact alone, but his curiosity had gotten the upper hand. And now Steve was paying for it.
“Hey, hey, we’re almost there, sweetheart, just another minute and then we can eat something and hear what Thor’s mother had to say.” Tony felt Steve’s hot breath ghost over his ear and he continued to stroke over his human back. Seeing the usually cool and composed Captain so distressed and unfocused made him nervous too.
“We’ll fix you, don’t worry.” Tony promised him quietly and hoped that he could keep his promise.
“Okay…” Steve sighed and snuggled closer to him. Tony could feel him hold his breath.
Steve still smelled like Steve, but there was another smell to him now which was new. He reminded Tony a bit of the scent that he knew from the horse-drawn carriages in Central Park. Tony buried his face a bit more in Steve’s shoulder and soon enough the doors of the elevator cab opened again to welcome them to Stark Tower’s penthouse suite, Tony’s and Steve’s suite.
“Finally!” In a whirlwind of fur and legs, Steve jumped out of the elevator cab, Tony in his arms, and the inventor yelped.
“Steve! Give a guy a warning, next time, will you?” Tony cursed from where he was hanging.
Surprised at the sudden action, he wrapped his legs around Steve’s human waist to hold onto him. Steve trotted through the open living room. Tony was glad that he had so much space up here. He fidgeted in his lover’s arms until he was sitting on his back and could hold onto his human torso. Patiently he waited until Steve was done examining every surface, who didn’t pay him any mind at the moment. He only watched the blonde with a raised eyebrow.
“Are you done, Steve?” Tony asked him after a while when Steve sifted through their blankets on their couch for the third time. He was getting honestly worried at the lack of lecturing he was getting from the team’s captain. Usually Steve would have already started with his usual speech to keep away from otherworldly things.
“Huh? Yeah. I mean… yeah. I’m sorry. I’m acting stupid, right?” Steve straightened up and looked a bit sadly over his shoulder at Tony and it nearly broke his heart to see him so confused. “It- It feels as if my thoughts are all muddled up.”
“Hey, no, it’s okay. Don’t be sad, sweetheart.” He patted his lover’s arm a bit awkwardly. Steve was acting weird, more than weird, but honestly? Stranger things had happened to them before, it was part of their job. (Remember: The Tony Frog Incident)
He smiled reassuringly at him, hoping to convince Steve as much as he tried to convince himself. “How about I get us a nice and warm cup of coffee while we wait for any news from Thor, huh?”
“Sir? Mr Odinson would like me to inform you that he has received word from his mother, Lady Frigga.” JARVIS’ suddenly piped up before Steve could answer him. “The statue that the Avengers had found in the abandoned Hydra lab was an ancient joke article, apparently from Asgard. Captain Rogers will remain in this body for the next twenty three hours and thirty seven minutes. According to Mrs Frigga’s professional opinion there should be no consequential damages and he will return to his human self tomorrow around the same time.”
Tony heaved a sigh. That was a huge relief. He wouldn’t have known how to reverse whatever had happened to Steve, seeing as he hadn’t done anything to the damn statue in the first place. “Thanks, J, you’re a lifesaver. Say hi to Thor’s mom and the others. I will take care of Steve for now.”
“Certainly, Sir.”
“You hear that, Steve? No Hydra, no AIM and no weird alien attack. Just a really lame joke article. Tomorrow you’ll be back to normal.” Tony slid from Steve’s back (with a few difficulties, because his horse body was just so freaking huge!) and went over to the kitchen where the coffee machine was already waiting for him.
Steve hummed an answer and went back to strolling through the suite as if he was seeing it for the first time. His curiosity was adorable, and he acted more like a foal than the stallion he probably was. Tony smiled at him. He was just precious.
With his arms full of drinks and food he came over to the couch, where Steve was standing, looking a little lost. But he smiled brightly at Tony when he turned towards him. That smile did funny things to Tony’s insides, even after three years of dating.
“Want to watch a movie, to kill some time?” Tony asked when he reached him. As much as he hated having to wait for a problem to solve itself, he also loved the opportunity to skip a whole afternoon of business meetings and nasty CEO duties. He’d rather spend the time with his boyfriend who had been away on many SHIELD missions lately and therefore hadn’t been home a lot.
“Yes, please!” Steve answered cheerily and proceeded to lay down on the fluff carpet in front of the couch.
Tony winced inwardly when he saw how the massive body was trying to lower itself to the ground. The position Steve was taking in on the ground did certainly not look comfortable. Tony’s back hurt just from looking at him.
“Mind if I sit with you?” Tony asked after placing all of his stuff on the small coffee table. He went over to Steve and took his face between his hands. He leaned in and kissed Steve’s lips gently.
“Not at all.” Steve opened his arms to welcome him in his embrace and Tony willingly went. “Can we watch Spirit ?”
“You’re so predictable, Steve. Of course we can.” Tony chuckled at his choice. JARVIS started the animated movie without missing a beat. Meanwhile Tony sat down cross legged and leant back against Steve’s huge body. Cuddling was a bit difficult, but they made things work.
Tony could feel the warmth through Steve’s shirt that he had been wearing all day. He let his hands wander over the strong muscles of his shoulder underneath his fur and as much as he hated magic, he was amazed by Steve’s centaur body. He wasn’t really paying attention to the movie, but that was okay.
“Steve?” Tony asked after almost half an hour of silence. Steve perked up and looked at him with big expectant eyes. His hand that had been carding through Tony’s hair the whole time stilled. Tony waved with one hand in the vague direction of Steve’s appearance. “I… I’m sorry. For, you know… this mess. I actually expected you to be mad, you know?”
Steve’s tail swished through the air and his hind legs twitched. “Honestly, I feel really weird. But I’m not mad. I was there and I know that you didn’t do anything weird with the statue. And Frigga promised I’ll be back to normal in less than twenty four hours. We had a weirder adventure than this. Remember the Frog?” Steve reassured and teased him. “It’s like I can't feel my feet at all, but then I walk and remember that I have to coordinate two pairs of legs instead of just one. I can see everything at once. And I’m…”
His voice became quiet and broke off before he finished the sentence. Tony raised his head from his spot on Steve's belly to get a better view of his face.. “What? You’re what? Sorry, I didn’t catch that.”
Tony could see Steve blushing in the darkness. It was one of his favorite looks on his boyfriend.
“I said… I said I’m naked the whole time! The team was there! And that’s embarrassing!” Steve hid his face in the pillows of the couch next to him.
Tony looked at him and really had to hold back his laughter. “Steve, you're not naked! You’re half horse! Horses don’t wear pants!”
“Doesn’t mean I can’t be embarrassed!” Steve looked at him scandalized and threw a pillow at his head. It was a half-hearted attempt at a fight, but Tony loved to bicker with his love.
He ducked laughing and leant over Steve’s butt to fetch the pillow from behind him. His eyes landed on a certain place between the blonde’s centaur legs and he turned around with a shit-eating grin on his face.
“Well, this whole thing has one big perk…” Tony pushed up and caught a surprised Steve in a cheeky kiss. “I always knew that my boyfriend was hung like a horse, and now I at least have video proof of it.”