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“This is going to be a problem,” Aether mumbled to himself as he read over the new commission he had been assigned. It had been issued as an emergency request; the poor messenger having searched hours on end for the traveling god before Aether realized he had been needed.
“What would the problem be?” Endora inquired with her soft voice, the little oceanid curiously floating down and trying to read the message upside down.
“I have to go to Dragonspine. There’s a team of adventurers that has gotten stuck up in the mountains. They appear to be fine, but the guild’s worried the rescuers may be attacked by angry churls so they want me on guard duty.”
“Ah,” Paimon gasped, as she looked at the little oceanid and back to the letter. “Yeah, I don’t think it’s a good idea to take her there.”
Endora made a little noise of confusion, like fizzling bubbles, “I do not understand, I have grown a lot, I am more than capable of accompanying you.”
“It’s not whether you’re capable…” Paimon begun, scratching her cheek. “More like, this place goes against everything you are? You would freeze, Endora.”
“Freeze?” She parroted, shrinking in on herself, her finlike arms retreating into her body. “Is this place… cold?”
“It’s a hellscape of never-ending winter!” Paimon said, waving her fingers ominously. Even though the small star spren was anything but threatening, especially bathed under the soft light of a Liyue morning, Endora still meeped and hurried to hide behind Aether as Paimon laughed.
“She sounds so tough, but Paimon also hates that place,” Aether whispered conspiratorially to the little oceanid by his neck. “She almost became a Paimon popsicle last time we were there.”
“That’s because you took too long to clear that hilichurl camp!”
“I distinctly recall telling you to wait for me by the heat lamp.”
“And let you get lost and freeze to death?!”
Aether rolled his eyes. “ What little faith you have in me.”
Paimon only stuck out her tongue at him.
“But anyway, I’m not risking taking you there, Endora.” Aether said next, forcing the conversation back on track, as he addressed their little friend again. “I know I promised I would let you accompany me on my journeys, but you understand our concerns, right?”
“Yes, Endora also doesn’t want to freeze to death.”
“She could wait with us at the Knights of Favonius.” Paimon suggested, looking at the little water spirit. “They owe us enough favors they could not refuse.”
“I would worry about people getting too curious.” Aether shook his head. “Besides, if anything goes wrong, it would only be more work for Jean.”
“The Knights of Favonius,” Endora hummed, “That is the militia of the Mondstadt, correct?”
“Yes, although they’re also the political body in charge. Anyway, Venti?”
Paimon pulled a face. “How could you even suggest that!? He’d turn her into a drunkard before we even left the city!”
“Paimon stop being so dramatic, he’s not that bad.” Aether huffed, pinching her cheeks. “Although I have no idea where he might be, and I am concerned about those adventurers... Maybe he’s not such a good option.”
“Oh, oh, I know!” The little spren said suddenly, legs kicking in the air, eyes glimmering with excitement and perhaps a hint of mischief. “Let’s ask Xiao!”
Aether blinked repeatedly. “Xiao. The Vanquisher of demons.”
Paimon giggled as she saw the very familiar glint in his eyes.
“Xiao.” Aether repeated, a smile slowly growing on his lips. “Our favorite babysitter.”
“One day, your dumb mouth will get you killed.” Paimon deadpanned, before the giggles broke past her attempt at seriousness. “He would not say no, though! Not to you!”
“Brace yourselves, then. We have a Yaksha to annoy.” Aether reached out for both sprens, Paimon sitting on the crook of his elbow, and Endora snuggling comfortably inside the bottle at his waist. Like that, Aether spun in place and teleported away.
By the time Aether and his little entourage found Xiao on the balcony of Wanghu Inn, the adeptus already looked aggravated.
“I haven’t even said anything,” Aether said in lieu of a greeting, the traveling god almost sparkling with giddiness.
“Hello, Xiao!” Paimon floated over to him, just as excited as her companion. “Aether cooked almond tofu for you!”
“I mean… if you want it,” He mumbled suddenly shy under the cold, silent stare of the adeptus. “It’s waiting for you at the kitchen, I wasn’t sure if you were here.”
Xiao let his gaze linger until Aether started fidgeting before letting out a sigh and relaxing his stance, as always unable to refuse the star traveler. “You have been well.”
“Yeah, how about you? The hillichurls giving you a hard time?”
“Hardly.” He replied without missing a beat, crossing his arms over his chest. The yaksha mask at his waist glowed ominously. “What is the reason for your sudden arrival? I was under the impression you had long since departed from Liyue.”
“We were wondering if we could ask a small favor of you.”
Xiao’s scowl turned fierce, his movements explosive as he prepared for battle. His jade spear materialized in the blink of an eye, dark shadows clinging to it, like dew drop would flowers.
“Who should I kill?”
The traveling god sighed as if unaffected by the sudden appearance of a weapon, or the tangible adeptal energy that swept the entire area; though his hyperactive energy faded into something more tranquil as he tapped a finger against his forehead, right over his scowl.
“I don’t want you to kill anyone, Xiao. That is not why we came. There’s a new friend I would like you to meet.”
Taking this as her cue, the little oceanid slowly bubbled up her bottle, coalescing into her mermaid-like form to hover nervously in front of the confused adeptus.
“My name is Endora,” She said solemnly. “And I do not want to freeze to death.”
Xiao relaxed his fighting stance, lowering his spear and pinching the bridge of his nose with his free hand, sensing he was getting wrapped up in yet another nonsensical ploy of Aether’s. “Explain.”
She’s an oceanid, from Fontaine!” Paimon hurried to say. “She came to visit, and has been traveling with us, but we need to go to Dragonspine, and we don’t want to expose her to such harsh weather. So we were hoping…”
“If you could keep her company? Just until we get back?” Aether continued when she hesitated, smiling that damn smile of his, and expecting nothing from Xiao.
(How could he ever say no?)
“Surely you must be aware that my fight against the lingering evil of this land is not safe either.”
“She could stay at the inn while you fight.” Aether said, oh-so-sagely, as if it made any sense at all. This only confused the adeptus even more.
“Then why do you need me at all? Just have her stay here, Verr Goldet would be happy to house your friend.”
Aether was not looking into his eyes now, the smile on his face growing small. That was irritating. “I just thought you would both enjoy the company. And as an oceanid, there would be no safer place than beside you.”
Xiao sighed as a token protest then looked back at the nervous blob floating in the air, his expression softening as the little one fidgeted. How young was she in the first place? What was she even doing away from other lochfolk? “So long as you do not disturb me, I suppose I could look after you.”
“I am most thankful!” Endora exclaimed, shooting tiny sprays of water to the air. “I promise to be as serene as an undisturbed pool, mister Xiao!”
“Just Xiao is alright.” Xiao said with a nod. That settled, the thunder returned to his expression as he faced the troublesome pair once again, stalking over to them.
He bonked the traveling god over the head with the butt of his spear, making sure to not actually hurt him. To Paimon, he just glowered even as she hid behind Aether while giggling. “And you two… you should not treat an adeptus with such familiarity, someone less lenient than oneself may find cause for offense.”
Even though he hid behind cold and rigid words, Aether never let the smile drop from his face, even if it lost its amused tilt.
“I would never dream to order an adeptus around,” The traveling god said, a hand over his heart. “But can you really fault me for finding any excuse to visit a friend?”
(It was often that Xiao found himself at a loss for words with the traveler from the stars.)
Aether’s smile widened at his silence, fondness in the crinkle of his eyes. He rocked back on his heels, and continued, “I should not take too long anyway, I’ll be back before you know it.”
Xiao then stepped closer without thinking, dangerously following his impulses. He caressed Aether’s cheek with the back of a gloved hand. “Dragonspine is a dangerous region, traveler. Should you find yourself in trouble, speak my name and I will come.”
Aether’s eyes glowed golden, his breath caught, then he just took Xiao’s hand and brought it to his lips. “You worry too much, I will be fine.”
The adeptus allowed the gesture, not even bothering to keep a pretense of distance between them.
(Aether always managed to sneak past his every defense after all.)
His hand was lowered, and their fingers found each other with ease.
“I trust in your strength way more than I trust you to call my name should you need me.”
The god had the gall to laugh at the admonishment. “I promise I won’t do anything reckless, Xiao. I promise to call for you if I need your help.”
“Good.” Amber eyes were then inevitably drawn to their intertwined hands, as always unable to fight the awe every time. Despite knowing it was a mundane, perhaps meaningless gesture, to the adeptus it always felt like a little miracle, an unbelievable sight.
(Even in the height of delirium, he would never have imagined he would find someone who’d wish to hold him. Someone who he wished he could…)
“Besides…” His sweet little temptation continued, unaware of the turmoil, the restlessness he evoked in him. “I actually would prefer to call your name when I want your company. It feels like a waste otherwise.”
Too much.
Xiao stepped away, closing his eyes, and feeling his heart hammering in his chest. Echoes of a foreign-familiar anger unfurled from the depths of his chest, crawling up his throat, digging its claws into his flesh, tearing him from the in-
Breathe in.
Out.
The sensation faded, disappearing back into the depths of his soul.
(It did not consume him. It did not threaten to break him. In the presence of Aether, the voices faded like shadows fleeing from the light of the sun.)
Aether was looking his way, he realized as soon as he opened his eyes, Paimon clutched tight in his arms, as if to stop himself from crowding closer. He was clearly worried, but there was no pity in the crease of his frown. It was a relief.
“Are you okay?” He asked, and at Xiao’s nod, he just carried on with only the smallest hint of hesitance. “Then, it’s settled right? You’ll watch over Endora while I’m gone?”
“Yes.”
“I won’t take long, I promise.” Aether said in the end. And then this absolute bastard disappeared on the spot, teleporting away before his eyes, and reminding Xiao that he could have done the same to get to him, instead of making his way through the inn by foot.
(“I just wouldn’t want to appear out of nowhere and scare you.” He’d said the first time.)
Xiao scowled at nothing.
(Bastard.)
“You are an adeptus, correct?” The little blob of water asked, trailing in the air by his side, and admiring the scenery of the nearby shores by Wangshu Inn.
“Yes.”
“What are adeptus?” She asked next, tilting her head to a side. It hadn’t been long since they had left the inn, and she warmed up to him so quickly, he found it mildly alarming. Xiao still wasn’t sure why the young ones all were like this.
Xiao mulled the words for a moment, enough for her to twirl twice around his head. “The adepti are illuminated immortals. People who have reached enlightenment, and who … were once bound to a contract to Rex Lapis.”
“Rex Lapis?”
“The former Geo Archon,” Xiao said softly, gently skirting the edge of the water. “The former leader of the adepti, the Prime of our kind.”
“Are adeptus humans?”
“Adepti are illuminated beasts and illuminated people.” He corrected her. “But not human.”
Endora hummed. “Complicated.”
“You’re young,” Xiao said, with amusement. “And the world holds many things for you to discover at your own pace, do not fret.”
“Endora will try her best!”
Xiao quirked a smile that nobody would see.
They continued their idle chat until Xiao had circled the entire perimeter around the inn, and decided to move inwards, away from the sea. Endora assured him that so long as she had her water bottle to return to once she tired, she would be fine.
She was curious of the world around her, but remained thoughtful and polite, easily reading his flickering mood and catering to it. Xiao even felt comfortable enough to indulge his own curiosity and asked her things in return.
“What drove you to leave Fontaine?” He asked the oceanid currently riding on the back of a curious hydro slime they had found by a stream. She kept slipping out of her mermaid shape, as she mingled with the slime, which seemed to bother neither of them.
Endora sank into the slime with an eep of surprise. Resurfaced again. “I needed to see Rhodeia. I do not know what drove me, but I just knew… I knew I had to discover the reason she left Fontaine.”
“Rhodeia?” Xiao hummed. “I haven’t formally met her, but she has lived in Liyue for a long time. Quite irritable, if memory serves right.”
Endora blew bubbles, in a thoughtful manner, they floated in the air like a visual ellipsis. “She’s one of the strongest of our kind, she left after the death of our Archon. Now that I have grown, I think I understand why. But… there are not many lochfolks here. She must feel lonely.”
“Are you going to keep her company then?”
“I’ll visit.” Endora said, softly. “But there’s so much of the world I want to see. I want to experience so much more. I… I want to travel with Aether and Paimon. The stream of life flows on. I cannot lay stagnant.”
They fell into a comfortable silence, both of them mulling over the words spoken. With the gentle trickle of the shallow stream, a gentle breeze bending the tall grass around them, they sat there.
In the end, all the adeptus had to say was, “You fit with them.”
Endora giggled. “Really? That’s nice.”
“Yeah.”
“How did you meet?” She asked with the innocence of a child.
Xiao crossed his arms and sighed, already exhausted from just thinking about it. “It is a long story, and I would rather not go into detail. They were… helping Liyue, with a situation they had nothing to do with. I… tried not getting involved, but Aether never seemed to care.”
Endora was a little confused, since he sounded aggravated, but there was a smile on his lips again. “Aether… is strong-willed.” She settled for saying.
“Yes.” Xiao tilted his head back, staring at the darkening sky above. “That he is.”
(A blade bathed in golden light, reflected off those inhuman eyes, an earth-shattering strike, the explosive energy of their collective adeptal energy, and something else just humming under his shimmering skin-)
“Xiao?”
(Golden eyes warming at the sight of the adeptus, returning again and again no matter how coldly Xiao brushed him off. A smile, a meal, an invitation to the mundane life he’d never dreamed of having.)
“No, it is nothing. Liyue is most thankful for his assistance.” He sighed. “I… I am most grateful as well.”
The Yaksha and the oceanid continued their patrol, the former keeping an eye out for danger, the latter twirling in the air, inquiring about everything and anything that caught her eye. She asked about his mask, his powers. About Liyue, and Rex Lapis, and the legacy he had left behind.
Xiao thought he would have to deflect, or even ignore some of her questions, but somehow Endora avoided all the painful questions, nothing but scholarly interest in her words, rather than any desire to fish for gossip. Unsurprising really, she was not human after all.
Xiao would never admit to it, but he widened the perimeter of his normal patrols. This in turn took them close to the outskirts of the city of contracts itself, as he made sure to point out.
Endora oohed and aaahed, and rained water on the Yaksha’s hair, as they gazed at the sea of lights and life from the heights of the mountain that loomed over it.
“This is the city you protect,” She said, landing softly on his shoulder as he dried his hair with a gust of anemo. “It is bigger than I thought. Bigger than Mondstadt most definitively.”
Xiao just grunted.
“I do not suppose we could get any closer?” Endora inquired, “I would love to examine the architecture up close.”
“I do not like crowded areas.”
“I suppose I’ll just ask Aether then,” Endora said immediately, not even trying to push the subject. “He has mentioned he comes to Liyue fairly often anyway.”
Xiao opened his mouth, but whatever he was going to say vanished in the air as he caught sight of a human couple making their way up the mountain.
He was quick to jump up a tree, the little oceanid held in his cupped hands before the humans stumbled their way out.
The adeptus was about to disappear, not keen on eavesdropping on them, or staying any more than necessary, but Endora fizzled curiously, leaning over his hands to peer down at them. He was unsure what would be so interesting, but he decided he could indulge her a little bit more.
So they hid up the tree, cloaked in shadows as the couple marveled at the sights, the girl explaining how she had found this place, and the boy gazing only at her.
But as soon as the humans started getting cozy with each other, the adeptus scrunched up his nose and disappeared on the spot, returning them to a lone hill close to the inn.
Endora expressed her disappointment by flopping down on a bubble double her size, and languidly floating next to him, but soon her sighs turned thoughtful.
“Do you ever wonder what is the concept of love?” The little creature asked, peering at the darkness beyond. “What does it mean to love someone?”
Xiao was silent as he mulled the words over. “I don’t know,” He said in the end.
“I see,” Endora sighed, as she floated idly. “For Oceanids, love is being one. Love is merging into the same body, sharing the same thoughts, flowing through the same river. But… other living beings die when they become one with water. Other living creatures express their love in different manners… But, even if humans can’t become one with each other, they still crave the proximity of others, it seems. Is it not possible for them to love an oceanid? Is it not possible for me to love them as well?”
“Do you want to drown them?”
“No,” She shook her head vehemently, her bubble burst and she dropped several feet before she caught herself with a twirl. “I know it would kill them, so I refrain. But…”
“You care enough to put their safety above your feelings.” Xiao pointed out. “You are trying to understand that which is unlike you.”
“It is… hard. But I like challenges. And Aether. I like Aether. And Paimon. They… teach me a lot of things.”
“…They’re good people.”
“I think…. That if you asked Aether he may be able to tell you..”
Xiao frowned, puzzled by this apparent non-sequitur.
“Tell me what?”
“I feel like he would know what love is.”
Xiao thought about it, despite his best efforts.
The soft touches, the warm smiles.
The oddly shaped almond tofu.
(He thought about his own heart struggling to beat out of his iron-clad control.)
“You may be right.” Xiao found himself replying. “But that is not a question I can ask.”
Endora’s shape shimmered in her confusion. “Why not?”
“Because I am afraid I would not be able to deal with the answer.”
“Afraid? Of not understanding?”
“Maybe so.”
“Complicated.” Endora concluded. “Feelings… are complicated.”
Xiao sighed. “You tell me.”
“But… they’re worth the trouble.” Endora concluded sleepily, finally winding down to rest against the wet grass, looking like an oversized dewdrop.
Carefully, the adeptus scooped her up and deposited her inside her bottle. Her body shimmered and lost any sense of shape, already fast asleep before Xiao closed the lid.
He held the bottle close, making sure not to jostle her too much as he started his walk back to the inn.
Xiao was not familiar with love.
As a concept, as an emotion.
Love was for the gods, for the songs and the wind.
Love was for the birds in flight, for the humans and the cities.
Xiao had never entertained such a thought. Or had never been allowed to, until his heart retained the shape of the chains that bound him no more.
But maybe.
Maybe love wasn’t as complicated as they were trying to make it.
Maybe love was just a careless greeting, an overjoyed grin.
Maybe love was the mutual affection of traveling companions.
Maybe love was the way a traveling god kept returning to a mere adeptus, bringing light, and joy and a sense of peace he had never felt before.
“Ah! Xiao! We’re back! How did things go with you two!?”
“Traveler,” Xiao said solemnly as Endora flew over to Paimon, excitedly showering the other spren in drops of shiny water. “How did your mission go?”
Aether grinned, and something in Xiao relaxed at seeing him uninjured. Perhaps a little tired, but that was to be expected. “It went alright. How about you?”
“Your… friend has some very interesting thoughts to share.”
“I knew you two would get along. Isn’t she just so cute?”
“Aether,” Xiao said then, so soft it almost went unheard. He stretched out a hand. “May I ask you a question?”
The traveling god took his hand without any prompting, smiling, always smiling at him. “Sure. What is it?”
What does it mean to love someone?
“Would you like to look at the stars from Jueyun Karst tonight?”
Aether stuttered to a stop, eyes wide, cheeks slowly painting pink, like a special type of sunset. Then he grinned. “Yes! I mean, yes, let’s go, right now even! Before you come to your senses! Paimon’ll keep watch of Endora, they’ll be fine-!”
Xiao gently drew him closer, so he could wrap his other arm around his waist. He was slow, taking measured breaths, keeping his heart beating steady.
There was tension in the air as he looked back into golden eyes, but there was no bloodlust, no violence. It was just them. Him, and Aether, and that beautiful rose on his cheeks.
(His soul was at peace.)
“I’ll teleport us this time.”
And even just those words made Aether smile wider still. “Okay.” He said, leaning into him.
Maybe love was trust.
(Maybe one day he would allow himself to ask.)
(And maybe, one day, he would be able to find an answer himself.)