Chapter Text
Eddie.
Bobby is in a mood .
Over the year or so Eddie has been working at the 118, he’s learned very quickly how to read the members of his crew. It was something he was genuinely proud of, and he supposes part of the reason they’ve become so close. He can tell when Chimney’s hiding something, when Hen’s had a rough night with the kids or when Buck’s feeling insecure, just by the looks on their faces.
Bobby, however, was a little more tough.
He’s seen him scared, he’s seen him in love, seen him worried, seen him confused. Like Buck, Bobby’s an open book with his emotions.
But the way Bobby looked walking into the station this morning… Eddie’s never seen him like that before.
“There’s something wrong there, right?” He asks Hen, who lets out a short chuckle.
“Oh, definitely.” She says. They don’t do anything about it until everyone’s in - unfortunately, that everyone doesn’t include Buck anymore. When they’ve changed into their uniforms and most of B shift has headed home, Eddie, Hen and Chimney corner Bobby as he’s pouring his coffee. “What is up with you?”
He sighs, somehow looking like he both doesn’t want to talk about it and has been dying to get it off his chest. “Buck and I had a fight last night.”
“A fight?” Chimney frowns. “Like a ‘you get on my nerves but I love you’ fight or…”
“More like a ‘he stormed out of my house super pissed at me’ fight.” Bobby replies, shaking his head as he takes a sip from his mug. “I don’t know what to do.”
Eddie hums, thinking back to the night before. He’d known Buck was having dinner at the Grant-Nash house, and so he didn’t think much of it when Buck dodged his texts all night and this morning. “Well, what was it about?”
Bobby almost looks… guilty . “You’re not going to like it.” He doesn’t get the chance to continue further though, as his focus shifts to a man climbing the stairs, Lena right beside him, dressed in her uniform. “Can I help you?”
The man shifts awkwardly, a duffel in one hand as the other scratches the back of his neck. “Yeah, sorry. I’m looking for Evan Buckley. I figured he’d be working, but…”
“No, he’s not today.” Bobby says calmly, if a little confused. “I’m Captain Nash. You are?”
The man seems to realize he hasn’t introduced himself and shakes his head, a smile ghosting on his lips. “Oh, I’m Tk. I’m Evan’s brother.”
Brother? Eddie’s a little stunned, and he doesn’t miss Chimney choking on his coffee out of the corner of his eye. Bobby, to his credit, recovers quicker than the rest of them and walks over, extending a hand for him to shake. “Wow. Uh, sorry. He’s never mentioned you.” He turns back and looks to Eddie. “Eddie, why don’t you give him a call? Tell him to come down here.”
Eddie nods curtly as Bobby leads Tk over, everyone introducing themselves. Eddie steps to the side, pulling out his phone and praying Buck will actually answer, considering he’s pissed at Bobby and clearly not in any mood to talk. “Eddie? Hey. Is everything okay?”
Eddie reassures him immediately. “Yeah, everything’s fine. No one’s hurt, um… someone came for you, at the station. He’s here now… he says he’s your brother?”
The surprise is evident in Buck’s voice. “Tk?”
“Yeah.” Eddie says, and before he gets the chance to say anything else, Buck replies, “Tell him to stay there, I’m on my way.” and hangs up.
He pockets his phone and walks back over, looking to Tk. “He said to hang tight, he’s on his way. I’m Eddie.”
Tk shakes his hand, pointing to each one of them and rattling off the names he’s been told. “Eddie, Bobby, Lena, Hen and Chimney. Do I wanna know the story behind that?”
“No.” Hen and Chimney answer in unison. Tk nods once in acceptance and rubs his hands together nervously, as Chimney says, “Uh, I’m actually Maddie’s boyfriend, by the way.”
“Oh!” Tk says, happily surprised. “That’s great. Last I checked she was married. I’m guessing Doug is…”
“Gone.” Chim says grimly. “I gotta say, Maddie’s never mentioned having another brother.”
Tk lets out an awkward laugh, “Yeah, she wouldn’t have. I’m not really her brother.”
Hen frowns, looking between the rest of them and seeing matching confused expressions. “Wait, I don’t get it. Are Maddie and Buck half-siblings or something?”
Tk presses his lips together, thinking for a second, just as confused as they are. “Uh, has Evan really never mentioned me before?” With the shake of their heads, Tk nods in understanding. “Shit. Well, he’s probably got a good reason. So, how is Maddie?”
Eddie… doesn’t trust him. It’s nothing to do with anything he says or does over the next twenty minutes they spend waiting for Buck to arrive, but Buck’s the most open-book person Eddie’s ever met. He knows there’s gotta be a story there and Eddie’s not sure it’s a good one - Buck’s not secretive in the slightest so if he’s hiding a whole brother, Eddie’s thinking maybe they don’t get along so well.
Yeah, that’s gotta be it, he decides.
Buck.
His brother looks like shit .
He’s wearing an old hoodie from their high school with his hands tucked into his pockets, a duffel hanging around from his elbow. His skin is pale and his scruff has grown in, and Buck can tell by the way he’s carrying himself that something bad has happened.
He’s sitting at the island surrounded by Buck’s team (plus Lena fucking Bosko ) and he looks to be comfortable enough, laughing at something Hen’s said. Even the brother he hasn’t seen in a year is getting along better with his team than he has been lately.
“You look like shit.” He voices his previous thought.
That gets a laugh out of Tk at least, as well as perplexed looks from the team. Tk smiles, getting up from his seat and starting to walk closer, his arms raised a little like ‘ what gives? ’. “That is exactly the type of greeting I wanted to get from my big brother.”
“Well, you show up here unannounced, looking like you’ve just crawled your way out of a grave. Forgive me for stating the obvious.” Buck’s face breaks out into an adoring grin as he walks towards him, pulling him in for a tight hug. He sinks into it, burying his face in Tk’s shoulder as he revels in the familiarity, and the magic of a Strand hug.
(He had only been with them for a year when he’d told Owen, “ I think your hugs are magic, Dad. They chase all the bad stuff away. ”)
When they pull away, Buck swears his brother’s eyes are a little glossy, but he can only tell because they’re so close. Tk avoids his gaze, and those of the team, as he says, “We need to talk.”
Buck nods softly and glances at Bobby, even though he really doesn’t want to. The older man just juts his head as a goodbye. He leads Tk downstairs and out to the side of the firehouse, sitting on the one of the benches as his brother opts to stand - which is another warning sign that this is bad. “Okay, your nervous energy is freaking me out.”
Tk lets out a shaky sigh at Buck’s statement as he bites his nails, finally revealing, “I relapsed.”
Buck’s eyes slip shut before he even realizes it. “Tk…” He whispers, his brother interrupting immediately.
“I know.” He’s practically pacing, his hands twitching as he clearly struggles to figure out what to do with them. “Look, I proposed to Alex and he said he was fucking his spin instructor. Not just fucking - he’s in love with him, I guess. And then, I just… snapped .”
Buck shakes his head, looking up at him. “When?”
“Saturday.”
Buck scoffs, angry with himself. “I fucking knew it. I had this feeling something was wrong… Does Mom know?”
Tk finally settles on crossing his arms over himself, biting his lip a little with a frown on his face. “I’m sure Dad’s calling her now. I asked him to wait until I got here. I didn’t want you to hear it over the phone.”
Buck’s a little confused at that, but Tk continues. “It was really bad, Ev. Dad found me, I wasn’t breathing…”
“You OD’d?” A relapse is one thing. He can handle a relapse. There’s been relapses before and they’ve got through it. But an overdose… fuck. “Mom is definitely coming.”
Tk shakes his head, sighing heavily as he sits down beside him, their knees touching. “I don’t think so. I think Dad’s gonna tell her not to crowd me or whatever.”
Buck shakes his head again, knocking their shoulders together. “What’s gonna happen now? Are you allowed to work?”
Tk nods. “Dad filed the paperwork as an accidental overdose.”
Buck narrows his eyes, a look on Tk’s face that he knows all too well - the one he’d seen at sixteen, when Tk had first OD’d. “But that’s not what happened.”
“That’s what I told him it was.” He says, clasping his hands together in front of him as he says the next part quietly. “Not sure if he believed me.”
They’re silent for a minute, before Tk speaks again. “So, I didn’t just come here to tell you what happened. I kinda need a favor, too.” Buck raises his eyebrow as his brother continues. “Did you hear about that firehouse in Texas that lost everyone?”
“Yeah. All but one, right?”
“Right.” Tk nods, bouncing his leg. “Well, Dad’s been asked to rebuild the station from scratch. I don’t think he was gonna do it until I OD’d, but he is now. And he wants me to go with him.”
Buck doesn’t even resist the urge to snort. “Dad wants to take you to Texas?”
“I know right.” Tk smiles widely, before his face falls and he gets serious. “There’s a lot of stuff he wants me to do. I’m not allowed to live on my own anymore, for one. But, the last time I got clean, I did it for him. And you, and Mom. I didn’t do it for me and look how that ended up. The second something bad happened, I relapsed.”
Buck nods in understanding, shaking his head like he should’ve known where this was going. “You don’t think you can get better if Dad’s looking over your shoulder the whole time.”
“Exactly. And so I thought, you know, maybe I could stay here with you. Get a job with LAFD, stay clean for me.” Tk suggests, and Buck knows it’d also be enough for their dad to feel comfortable letting Tk out of his sight, since he trusts Buck to look out for him. Buck lets out a heavy sigh, rubbing his hands over his face as he thinks about it. “Well, don’t look too excited.”
Buck barks out a laugh, shaking his head. “You can stay here. Of course you can. But I’m not having too great of a time either.”
Tk shifts so he’s facing him completely, frown spreading across his lips. “Why? What happened?”
“I’m not exactly working right now. I’m stuck on light duty.”
Tk sucks in a sharp breath. “Because of the accident? I thought you were cleared? You passed certification.”
Buck nods, avoiding his gaze. “My captain thinks that the blood thinners I’m on makes me a liability.” As he says it, he can hear the anger from the night before rising in his stomach. In a way, he’s lucky Tk showed up. He’d been seconds away from calling up that lawyer and filing a lawsuit himself when Eddie had called with the news of his brother’s arrival. “I’m not really on good terms with my team right now.”
They all had to have known, right? There’s no way they didn’t question Bobby about it when they were first told Buck couldn’t come back and he doubts Bobby would lie to their faces. Though, he’d had no problem lying to Buck.
“I’m sorry.” Tk says sincerely. “Now, I feel like a dick. You’ve clearly got your own shit going on.”
Buck shakes his head, smiling a little. “No, I’m glad you’re here. When I have no one else, I always have you.” Tk grins back, letting himself be tucked under Buck’s arm. They’re quiet for a minute, before Buck jokes, “You know, the two of us under one roof again might just be kinda fun. I need a bigger apartment, though.”
“I’ll split rent.” Tk says, laughing until he feels Buck tense at the sight of a familiar car. Maddie Buckley climbs out, looking a bit frazzled, Tk notices. She runs over, purse in hand and stops only a few feet from them.
“Is everything okay? Chimney texted me that you were here. Is everything good with your parents?” She says, a little out of breath, as if she’d raced to be here.
Tk nods, standing up and rubbing his hands against his pants nervously. “Yeah, no. They’re good. Sorry to scare you.”
The interaction is only the tiniest bit awkward between the two, but Maddie lets out a sigh of relief nonetheless, nodding gratefully. “Thank god for that.” She pauses for a second, catching Buck’s gaze as she puts on a kind smile. “Well, I’m here now. We should get lunch.”
Buck’s heart melts at the smile that spreads across Tk’s face at the invitation. It’s not like Tk and Maddie don’t get along, it’s just that they’ve never really had the chance to become anything other than the two people who have Buck in common. “Yeah, we should do that.” Buck answers for him.
Maddie smiles again, tugging on the bag around her shoulders. “Okay, well… Why don’t you guys meet me at the café we always go to? I’m just going to say hello to Chimney.”
The boys nod, Buck swinging an arm around his little brother’s shoulders again as he leads him away, sending a grateful look over his shoulder to Maddie. I love you. Thank you for being here, it says.
Maddie.
Maddie was never going inside to just say ‘hello’ to her boyfriend.
Well, she did of course, but she can greet him anytime. Today, at the sight of Tk Strand, she realizes things are about to change, as they always do.
She strides in with her head held high, climbing the steps to the loft and resisting the urge to snort at the team all huddled around the island, no doubt discussing Buck and Tk. They don’t notice her; too lost in their theories and so she clears her throat, “Hello?”
Chimney’s head snaps up and he smiles, making his way over quickly and kissing her cheek, before dragging her to the island before she can get another word in. “So, is everything okay? What’s going on? Why didn’t we know Buck has a brother but somehow you don’t?”
Maddie tries not to roll her eyes. She really does.
She sets her back down in one of the chairs and takes a breath, making sure everyone is paying attention to her before she starts. “Look, the thing with Tk is complicated and Buck really hates talking about it. For good reason, too. It’s not my place to say, but Tk is his brother, and kind of by extension, mine. But that’s not what’s important right now.”
Eddie frowns immediately and asks, “What’s happened? Is it bad?”
Maddie shrugs her shoulders and says, “I don’t know. Tk seemed mostly fine, or at least as fine as Buck is. We won’t know anything unless Buck tells us. But guys… every time they see each other, it always brings up some really hard shit so just… don’t push.”
Hen frowns, leaning in closer. “What kind of hard shit? I mean, he’s supposed to be coming back to work soon, right? Is this gonna delay it?” Bobby shifts onto the other foot nervously, accidentally capturing the attention of most people there. Hen raises an eyebrow, narrowing her eyes as she says warily, “Cap?”
Bobby sighs, wringing his hands together. “Buck coming back to work was what we fought about last night.”
Maddie frowns at the sentence, her being the only one unaware that the captain and her brother are on the outs. “What do you mean?”
Bobby huffs, avoiding their gazes. “I’m not certain that Buck should be coming back to work while he’s on the blood thinners.”
Maddie lets out a breath, the situation becoming crystal clear. “Yep, that would do it.”
Hen waves her hand in question. “I don’t get it, Cap. He’s cleared, isn’t he? Passed all the tests, the doctor said he could come back even on the blood thinners.”
Bobby nods. “I know. He’s not going to be on light duty forever, but the blood thinners pose a risk to him and to all of you. Guys, he could get cut and not even realize it because of adrenaline. We might be too busy to see it and then he could have some real problems. And what if one of us is in trouble and we need him, but he’s incapacitated because of a gash. I don’t like it, but as your captain, I have to look out for all of you as well as Buck.”
Maddie drops her face into her hands and moans, “God, this is the last thing he needs right now.” as Chimney reaches a hand out to rub her back comfortingly.
Eddie bites his lip, shaking his head as he asks, “Okay, as shitty as this is, can we get back to the Tk of it all? What do you think happened?”
Maddie lifts up her face to look at them as she shrugs her shoulders. “I don’t know, guys. Tk and I aren’t exactly close, we’ve only been in the same room a handful of times. Look, Buck loves Tk, but how they met isn’t exactly a nice story and definitely not one he wants me to tell you. There’s all this shit from our childhood that he still struggles with, so he’s gonna be a little on edge while he’s here. Not to mention, Tk’s a firefighter. So, knowing his brother gets to do their dream job while Buck’s stuck on light duty for an accident he had no control over? That’s gonna sting.”
Bobby looks down, eyes somber. “I’m not doing it to hurt him.”
Maddie smiles. She knows that, as does everyone except Buck. “I know. Honestly, if I know my brother, he’s not as pissed about the light duty as he is about his spot being taken.”
Eddie’s eyebrows knit together, clearly not having seen that one coming. “Lena’s only here temporarily.”
Maddie hums. Fucking clueless idiots. “But she’s still a replacement.”
--
The lunch is… awkward.
Maddie’s never really had the chance to get to know Tk - actually she thinks she knows Owen the best out of all the Strands (and she can count on one hand how much she knows about him) - and he’s understandably spending a lot of time catching up with Evan, so she mostly just listens to him update them on how the Strand family is doing and answers his polite questions about Chimney and work. He doesn’t mention a single thing about Doug and it kind of warms her heart a little that he’s doing that just to be respectful, because she knows damn well Buck would never tell a soul about what happened that Maddie hadn’t already told.
Before their food has arrived, Tk gets a call from his mom and heads outside to answer, though not before sending a slightly scared look Buck’s way. They have a silent little conversation with their eyes and Maddie catches on to Buck’s reassurance and Tk’s tiny nod as she takes in her brother’s body language. He actually seems… relaxed. Content, even.
Maddie hums, resting her chin on the palm of her hand. “You look happy.”
Buck grins just for a moment, looking down a little bashfully. “I am. I missed him.” He admits quietly.
The sentence sends a jolt of anger up Maddie’s spine. She’s obviously seen the Strands less than Buck has, but she knows he hasn’t seen them anywhere near enough since being in LA. She bites her lip, hesitating before saying, “Yeah. I’m surprised it took him this long to visit. I mean, I thought for sure they’d all come down after the accident…”
As if sensing the resentment she was working very hard to keep out of her tone, Buck snaps his head up and shakes it. “I asked them not to, Maddie. Don’t be pissed at them. They wanted to be here.”
That confuses her. “Uh… why would you do that?” He gets this look on his face that she knows she’s seen before, but can’t place. “Evan?”
He sighs as if he really doesn’t want to say it, but knows she’ll push. “Look…” He trails off, shaking his head as he tries to find the words. “Things get weird when we’re all in the same place. And I know it brings up stuff for you so I just figured it’d be easier if I kept it all separate. I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
There have been many times when Maddie’s brother has broken her heart, though it’s mostly been with physical injuries and that pleading look in his eyes when he thinks she’s gonna leave him for good. Rarely with words. This takes the cake.
She blinks a few times, shaking her head, slightly astonished at her brother’s capacity to love unselfishly. “Evan, of course it brings up stuff for me. I’m always gonna be angry and I’m always gonna have regrets… but you were crushed by a ladder truck, Buck! You needed your family there and I can’t believe that you denied yourself and them, all because you were worried I was gonna feel uncomfortable.”
He shakes his head and tries to brush it off, like she expected he would. “Maddie, it’s not a big deal…”
“Yes, it is.” She cuts in, reaching across the table to grab his hand. “You have to promise me that you’ll never push them away again just because you’re trying to look out for me. You not being with them when you needed them hurts me more than being reminded of what our parents did.”
Buck clutches her hand tightly and nods gratefully, mumbling, “Promise.” before he takes her pinky and locks it with his. She grins, staring at him for a second before they let go and Buck speaks quietly, and somewhat nervously. “Just so you know, Owen and Gwyn are probably gonna be coming down here pretty soon.”
Maddie frowns, kind of putting the pieces together herself. “Is something wrong with Tk?”
Buck nods and then responds quietly, “He OD’d a couple nights ago.”
“Shit.” Maddie lets out accidentally.
Buck nods again, tone still low. “Our dad- uh… Owen is thinking of moving him to Texas. Obviously, it’s gonna be hard. He’s not planning on letting Tk out of his sight, and Tk’s worried that if he goes, he’s gonna get clean for the wrong reasons and just relapse again.”
“Wow…” Maddie leans back in her chair, letting out a breath. “So, Tk’s gonna be sticking around then?”
Buck nods, pressing his lips together. “Seems that way.”
Maddie tilts her head to the side, chewing on her cheek. “How’s that gonna be for you?”
A ghost of a smile appears on Buck’s lips as he admits, “Weirdly, I kinda feel like he showed up exactly when I needed him. You know, sometimes I forget that I have them, as fucked up as that sounds. I guess, I’ve just been away for so long that I slip into old habits. I don’t rely on them the way I should, or contact them as much. Now that I realize it, it must be killing them.”
Maddie hums, crossing her arms over her chest a little proudly. “Well, I know Gwyn and Owen will mostly be here for Tk, but if you guys have the chance, I’d love to have dinner. It’d be nice to get to know them normally, without all the bullshit.”
Buck nods happily and it brings a mirrored smile to Maddie’s face - something so simple, like making an effort with his parents, she can tell has just lifted his spirits. “I’ll mention it to them.” He says, as Tk comes back in, handing the phone to Evan and saying, “Mom wants to talk to you. Sorry.”
Buck rolls his eyes lightheartedly and takes the phone, bringing it up to his ear as he spends three full minutes reassuring Gwyn that Tk’s fine, with him, and he promises to take good care of him, as well as himself. He manages to hold her off on getting an immediate flight but tells her to take a couple weeks to finish up the case she’s working on and then fly in with Owen.
Just as he’s hanging up, their food arrives at the table and Buck’s siblings don’t even bother to wait for him, digging into their plates. When he hangs up, Tk says, “Well, that sounds like it went well.”
Buck snorts, picking up a fork and stabbing his waffle. “Yeah. You’re damn welcome.”
--
Maddie stews over her brother’s revelation throughout the rest of the day, barely able to focus on anything other than folding laundry and letting her mind wander. When Chimney shows up after his shift, Maddie lets out a sigh of relief and he just stares nervously.
“How did it go today?” He asks, setting his duffel down and walking over to kiss her cheek.
“Well… that’s a complicated question.”
Chimney nods in understanding and waves his hands. “That you can’t answer, I know.”
Maddie squints, playing with his fingers as she admits, “Well, I could tell you. Buck doesn’t mind but I don’t know if you’ll be able to keep it quiet from the rest of the team.”
Chimney hums, deciding, “If you need to talk about it then you should tell me so I can be there for you. Not telling the team will suck, but if it means neither you nor Buck have to go through this alone, I’m all ears.”
Her heart swells up with love as she brings him in for a kiss and mumbles, “Thank you.” against his lips. He grins and moves around her, grabbing a cup out of the cupboard and filling it with water as she sits down at the island. “So, you’ve probably noticed I don’t really talk about my parents.”
Chim nods, taking a sip. “Yeah, but I don’t talk about mine either.”
Maddie nods. “Well, I left Hershey when I was twenty-two to go to med school in Boston with Doug. Buck was only thirteen at the time… it wasn’t long after that things got pretty bad with Doug. Not their worst, but still bad enough that I kind of lost touch with everyone else. My parents were pissed at me so it wasn’t until two years later that I went home to talk things out with them and I realized that Buck no longer lived with them.”
Chimney’s eyebrows furrow together and he tilts his head as she continues on. “Once I left, my parents decided that since I was gone, Buck was too much for them and they didn’t want to have him around anymore, so they kicked him out. As far as I know, he crashed on friends’ couches for a while until they got sick of him and he eventually made his way to a homeless shelter. One of the volunteers there turned out to be Tk’s uncle, Keith. Most people at the shelter were older and Keith didn’t think it was very safe for Evan to be there, so he let him live at his place for a month before he took him to New York. Keith really didn’t have the financial stability to be a foster parent and so his brother, Owen and his wife, Gwyn took Evan in as their own. Adopted him a year later.”
“Oh my god.” Chimney whispers, eyes soft with pain and concern. “So your parents just… abandoned him? No wonder Buck’s so… Buck .”
Maddie nods sadly, picking at her nails and blinking tears back furiously. “I only found out when I went home and obviously my parents had no idea where Evan went, so it took me a while to find him. I did eventually and the Strands had no problem with me seeing him but… with everything with Doug, I visited sort of rarely before I left him again, after he turned eighteen. I always liked them but I was so pissed that I never really made an effort. Everytime I saw Buck with them, I was just reminded that my parents had abandoned him behind my back and I guess I forgot that there were people that chose him.”
Chim shakes his head, still frowning as he says softly, “That’s not your fault.”
“It is now.” Maddie sighs, wiping at her eyes. “Buck begged them not to fly out after his accident even though he wanted them there. He didn’t want to make me uncomfortable.” Chimney resists the urge to fondly roll his eyes at the revelation. “I just wish he wasn’t so selfless that he sacrifices what he needs all the time.”
“Yeah, me too. But you know him, Maddie. That’s who he is.” Chimney breathes out, pausing a minute before adding. “I can’t fucking believe your parents just gave him up ! Who does that?”
Maddie lets out a dry, bitter laugh. “They said he was difficult . That he never made it easy. God, the amount of times I’ve chewed them out over it and they still can’t see reason… we’re just lucky Keith found him or else he would’ve died out there. Alone.”
Chimney’s frown grows even deeper. “So, where does the brother come into all of this?”
“Well, it looks like he’s gonna be staying here semi-permanently.” Maddie admits, checking her phone for any texts from Buck or Tk. “Tk’s had a bit of a rough go recently, so Buck convinced their parents to let him take care of him, at least for now. They’ll probably come visit soon enough though. I kind of already told Buck that when they get here, we should all have dinner. Sorry.”
He lets out a small laugh, shaking his head fondly. “Don’t worry about it. I kinda feel like I need to hug all of them now.”
Buck.
The more time goes on, the more Buck starts to hate his loft.
He’d loved it in the beginning, but two months of sleeping on his own couch and now however many more of sharing a bed with Tk until they can find a two-bedroom to rent for a reasonable price… Buck officially hates the place.
He’s not worried about rooming with Tk, though. Hell, they did it for five years straight and rarely ever fought, much to their parents’ surprise. At least in the loft, they don’t have to share a bathroom.
His brother didn’t bring too much stuff either, having pretty much hopped a plane before anyone in New York could notice, so unpacking is fast and it’s not long before they’re sprawled across the sofa, drinking gatorade and barely paying attention to some random comedy they put on. Buck’s phone keeps buzzing and he just knows it’s notifications from the team, but he can’t be bothered to deal with it right now. That is, until Tk chucks a pillow at him and threatens to do worse if he doesn’t answer.
He’s got numerous missed texts and one call from Eddie, two calls from Bobby and a few sporadic, non-insistent texts from his sister, mostly asking how Tk’s doing and if they need anything. Buck calls Bobby back because despite how pissed he is… the other option is calling Eddie and he really doesn’t feel like being interrogated about his brother’s sudden appearance.
When the line connects, Bobby seems surprised. “Buck, hey.”
“Hey, Cap. You called?” He says, voice tight.
Bobby sighs on the end of the line and Buck can almost imagine him glancing around the house nervously. “Yeah. Listen, I know you’re probably busy and you’re dealing with whatever’s going on with your brother, but I’d really love the chance to explain myself. I don’t want you thinking that I’d do anything to hurt you or replace you or… or take you away from your job. There’s more to it.”
Buck huffs, nodding. He expected this. And yeah, he knows Bobby and there probably is more to it, but he was so pissed. Pissed enough that he was thinking about going over Bobby’s head - the legal way. So, he figures he might as well talk this out before it blows up because really, he’s gonna have his hands full with Tk for the next few weeks before his parents come to town. “Yeah, okay. Um, Tk will probably just sleep all day tomorrow, so do you wanna do breakfast?”
“Yeah.” Bobby says with the tiniest hints of excitement and relief. “You can come here. I’ll make something.”
“Alright.” Buck says, eager to end the conversation so he can stop thinking about it. “Well, I’ll see you then. Night, Cap.”
“Night.”
He hangs up the phone and is a little stunned to see Tk looking up at him expectantly. “How bad is this?” He asks.
Buck sighs, plopping back down on the sofa and propping his feet up as he mumbles, “I guess, we’ll find out.”
--
Breakfast is… great.
Buck’s actually a little pissed at himself that he got so pissed. Bobby’s in a tight spot - he’s trying to protect both Buck and the team, and it’s only the blood thinners he’s got a problem with. He doesn’t at all think Buck isn’t capable or that he’ll be purposefully reckless or put off getting injuries checked out like he may have done in his probie days.
Buck feels a hell of a lot better.
Especially since the team had no idea about any of this.
Bobby said he pulled some strings and he’s gonna have Buck doing some paperwork for him so he can still be at the 118, but he won’t be on calls. He’ll be able to eat with them and chat and cook with Bobby like he did pre-bombing… It's a good plan. And if Buck’s being honest, he feels a little jolt of tenderness in his chest when he realizes Bobby’s figured it all out just so he wouldn’t feel like he was separated from them (Buck assumes that has something to do with Maddie, but he can’t even be mad).
Buck apologizes to both Bobby and Athena for walking out of dinner pissed and Athena just pats his cheek kindly, shaking her head as if she’d already forgotten it ever happened and offers him a glass of lemonade of all things.
He’s set to return to the 118 the next day and there’s a little kick in his step as he strides into the station, not at all surprised when Chimney is the first to him, pulling him in for a tight hug. He’d figured Maddie would tell Chimney and he’s sort of glad she has - she should have someone to talk to about the feelings Tk being here will bring up. Chim squeezes him tight for a second and then pulls away, says, “I’m glad you’re back.” but the look in his eyes tells Buck that there’s so much more he wants to say, though knows he can’t in front of the rest of the team, who are quickly making their way over.
He accepts hugs from all his friends and a handshake from Lena before Bobby’s leading him upstairs to help him make breakfast, clearly still trying to make up for their brief but loud fight. Thankfully, no one on the team really questions his brother’s sudden appearance, at least not out loud, so Buck doesn’t even have to avoid Eddie - just stare after him wistfully when they all leave to go on call and Buck’s left behind to fill out paperwork. He hates it, but he’ll do it.
It’s been three weeks since the tsunami - five since his embolism - which means there’s only four left until he’s off the blood thinners and he can get his job back full time. He’s honestly counting down the days - as is Tk, evidently. He doesn’t love listening to his brother’s moping when he comes home from work and is just trying to watch some fucking TV. One look from Buck shuts him up though, as he’s supposed to be grateful Buck’s taking care of him and purposely not telling their parents’ about the real nature of Tk’s overdose.
The weirdest part though, is Maddie’s coming around constantly , when Buck’s not even there! He appreciates the effort she’s putting in to be there for Tk since Buck cares about him so much, but he’s kept both families separate for so long that it’s honestly a little hard to adjust to. Chim comes around too, mostly to keep Tk company when Buck’s at Eddie’s place for movie nights with Chris. Tk’s always liked Maddie, even when there was that brief period when he was afraid Maddie coming back into Buck’s life meant she was going to take him away, and he seems to get along really well with Chim - it seems he’s finally found a member of the family that isn’t absolutely hopeless in the movie department.
But as he knew it would, the truth about the Strand family eventually comes out.
The team is eating lunch at the 118, Buck joining in after finishing up his paperwork delivery to the chief, and Chimney’s talking animatedly about an argument he had with Tk over the best Star Wars movie. “And this damn kid has the audacity to say it’s Revenge of the Sith!”
Buck snorts a little too loudly, and Eddie nudges his side. “Isn’t that one your favourite too?”
“What?” Chim yells out, astonished.
Buck grins, “I hate to break it to you, Chim, but you’re not gonna convince him of anything else. It was the first movie we ever watched together. Actually, it was the first movie we ever watched as a whole family, too.”
Hen laughs out loud, smacking Chim’s shoulder. “Ha! I guess it’s Maddie’s favourite too, then.”
Buck shakes his head. “She wasn’t there.”
It’s only after he’s said it that he realizes that based on what they do know, they’re clearly all confused by the sentence. They’ll find out the truth eventually, he figures - especially when his parents come into town - so he might as well let it out now. With one reassuring look from Chim, he quickly blurts out. “Uh, when Maddie went to med school, my parents kicked me out. The Strands found me and adopted me. That’s why Maddie doesn’t refer to Tk as her brother; he’s technically not. And she didn’t really know him or my parents until a few years later and she wasn’t really around much.”
He can just feel the concerned stares and he stabs a piece of pasta and eats it quickly, hoping to avoid any pity or sympathy. It’s just too weird. “It’s fine.” He shakes his head. “It was a long time ago.”
“Doesn’t mean it was right.” Chimney mumbles, and Buck supposes this is part of what he’s never said.
Buck puts his fork down and looks around at all of them. “Guys, it’s fine. They just couldn’t handle it.”
“Couldn’t handle it?” Hen repeats incredulously, but also a little too soft. “Buck, you were their son…”
“And I was a little shit.” He nods, as if it’s obvious. “I never made it easy on them. They just… weren’t cut out for it.”
Eddie’s soft look turns hard as he nudges Buck. “That doesn’t mean they had any right to abandon you. You were just a kid.”
Buck doesn’t really look like he believes him, and instead sighs heavily. “It’s over now. I’m fine. I got the Strands out of it, so I’m good. I haven’t spoken to them in years.”
Luckily, the conversation is mostly dropped.
He pretends like he doesn’t see the unreadable glances Eddie sends his way.
Tk.
There’s not much Tk remembers from his first overdose. It was a year before Buck left New York; Tk was only sixteen and Buck had been helping his Uncle Keith fix up his motorcycle when he got the call. Owen had barely said much on the phone, just that he’d found Tk in bad shape and Buck had to get to the hospital.
After the three day stay, nothing really changed. Tk was quiet and withdrawn, Buck had to fight for him to have any freedom from their parents’ hovering - especially when Gwyn flew in. He’d play video games with Tk in his room to drown out the blame game the two older Strands played every single night.
Owen should’ve noticed. Gwyn should’ve been here.
Neither of which Tk or Buck really believed, but they always defaulted back to fighting when things were changing.
Buck and Tk had one single conversation about it.
(Buck: Were you trying to kill yourself?
Tk: No.
Buck: Okay.)
After that, things between the two of them mostly went back to normal. He knew Buck felt guilty that he hadn’t known Tk was getting into drugs, but he’s very skilled at acting like everything is fine - a trait both brothers share.
Now, almost nine years later, things are exactly like they were back then.
(With the exception of no Gwyn and no Owen breathing down their necks.)
Tk spends most of his time at Buck’s place, not doing much to help in the apartment search and instead, spending his time watching movie marathons. Fortunately, he doesn’t complain about the check-ins from Maddie and Chim while Buck’s at work. If his brother is letting him stay here when he’s clearly struggling himself, he figures the least he can do is exist on his terms. They’re easier than his father’s, anyway.
It’s not like he’s taking Buck for granted - he has enough money saved up that he doesn’t need to go back to work right away so it’s not like they have to worry about rent or grocery fees. At first, he was terrified to not go back to work right away, but this is new territory for him. He’s not sure he can just… move on like he did before. Pushing through while acting like nothing happened might not be the best course of action.
But… he is going a little stir crazy. Especially on nights when Buck’s not home. He’s at one of his teammates' houses tonight - Tk has to admit that he hasn’t really put in the effort to learn anyone’s name besides Chim - and Tk’s alone, not for the first time. But tonight’s different for some reason. He just feels like he’s floating around the apartment on autopilot, not really aware of much. And it’s sort of terrifying.
So, he becomes desperate. Desperate to feel something at last, after these past three weeks of nothing.
He orders an Uber to the nearest bar and starts swinging his fists at the earliest opportunity.
( “It’s not that she didn’t see you, it’s that… she didn’t like what she saw.”)
He’s more than surprised that just as he’s about to be beat, he’s pulled back forcefully and there’s the sound of a fist connecting with a jaw, plus his brother’s familiar presence pushing him into the arms of someone else. He barely gets the name, “Evan.” out before Buck’s teammate has taken him out the front and his voice is muffled, somehow calming down the other participants. Buck joins them seconds later with a hard look in his eye and Tk avoids his gaze, instead asking, “What are you doing here?”
“Stopping you from getting your ass kicked.” He says coldly, glancing at his friend and mumbling, “Eddie?”
Eddie puts his hands on his hips and speaks comfortingly, “Seems fine. Just a busted lip.”
Tk can’t help the scoff that escapes him. “You do know I’m dual-certified, right?”
Buck hums sarcastically. “Really? You sure you’re smart enough for that?”
Tk deflates. He knows it was stupid but really, he wasn’t expecting Buck to know about it until he’d already iced his certain injuries. He definitely wasn’t expecting one of Buck’s friends to now know a smidge of just how fucked up he is. They’re having a silent conversation with their eyes, too and it’s creepy as hell.
A squad car pulls into the parking lot before much else can be done and Buck growns at the sight of the officer that steps out. He turns to Eddie and says, “Can you take Tk to the car?”
Eddie looks like he wants to protest, but then catches a glimpse of their captain getting out of the passenger side and nods, clapping Buck on the shoulder and tilting his head for Tk to follow. He does, climbing into the passenger seat wordlessly, barely looking at Eddie. Instead, his eyes are trained on the way his brother’s shoulders are tight, jaw clenched as he walks over to his captain, who Tk can tell is pissed off. He can’t hear anything that’s being said, only muffles of spewed words, Buck not speaking once and just taking it. Tk’s breath hitches and he keeps staring as he asks, “Is he gonna get in trouble?” Eddie doesn’t say anything so Tk looks over, raising a brow.
He sighs, lips pressed into a tight line as he says, “Yeah. I think so.”
Tk winces, biting the inside of his cheek in regret. Eddie juts his head up and Tk turns his head around again to see his brother walking over, leaning his arms over the window once Tk’s rolled it down. “Eddie,” He says, nothing in his face indicating that he’s pissed at his brother. “Mind taking Tk back to my place?”
“Sure.” Eddie says, the two of them doing that weird eye conversation again before Buck looks at his brother.
“Are you in trouble?” Tk asks before he can stop himself.
Buck hesitates and then says, “Don’t worry about it.” Tk hates that answer but before he can say anything else, Buck continues. “Go home, eat something. Get some sleep. I’m serious, everything’s okay.”
Tk frowns, but knows he can’t argue. Buck smooths a hand over Tk’s hair and says, “Love you.” before looking at his friend. “Thanks, Eddie.”
He’s walking away before Tk can say it back.
--
The drive is completely silent, Tk too busy brooding and Eddie, he assumes, a little pissed at Tk’s recklessness. He has a feeling the guy doesn’t like him and that’s fine, he just hopes it doesn’t affect whatever he’s got going on with his brother. Surprisingly, Eddie exits the car with him and follows him up, using his own key to unlock the door and flicking all the lights on comfortably, like it’s him that lives there. Tk bites his lip and watches as Eddie moves into the kitchen, grabbing a beer for himself. “I’d offer you one, but you know.”
Tk snorts out a laugh, cracking his knuckles. “So, he told you.”
Eddie takes a sip and then says dryly, “Well, he got pretty freaked out when he got the Life360 notification that you were at a bar. Thought you’d relapsed and was racing out of my house within seconds.”
So that’s how he knew. Tk hums, rounding the island and pulling a box of mac ‘n cheese out of the cupboard. “Want some?”
Eddie nods, sitting on the stool in silence for a few minutes, before Tk speaks up again. “I didn’t go there to drink, you know.” He says, because for some reason, he feels the need to explain himself, if only because this guy clearly matters to Evan.
“Clearly.” Eddie says, as if it’s obvious. “You went there to pick a fight. Believe it or not, I’ve been there.”
Tk’s eyes narrow and Eddie continues. “I mean, not the drinking… but the picking fights just to feel something? Yeah. Shitty thing to do, but it works in a pinch.”
Tk hums again. He’s a little surprised at Eddie’s willingness to just divulge something like that, but then again, Tk probably looks like shit and maybe he just feels bad for him. “Yeah. Never in the long run, though. I’ve just fucked things up for my brother, haven’t I?”
Eddie huffs, nodding. “I think so. He’s not really on great terms with our captain right now.”
“I thought they had breakfast. Patched it up.” Tk frowns, stirring his mac.
“They did, but it’s complicated. There’s conditions on Buck coming back to work.” He says, putting his empty beer bottle down. “Buck’s supposed to be staying out of trouble because of the risk the blood thinners pose. Getting into a fight, even just to break it up, could’ve really put his health at risk.”
Tk nods slowly, hesitating before he speaks again, “Can I ask you something?” Eddie gives him an open look. “How bad was it? The accident? I mean, we saw it on the news… but he practically begged us not to come down. I was gonna ignore him but my dad was scared we’d just make it worse if we didn’t listen to him.”
“Pretty bad.” Is all Eddie says, before deciding that’s probably not enough of an answer. “At this point, I think he’s more pissed off than anything. He just wants to get back to work and now he has all these health issues and… his girlfriend broke up with him, too. Right after it.”
Tk almost drops the bowl he’s getting out of the dishwasher. “Wow. I didn’t even know he had a girlfriend.”
“Oh.” Eddie says, avoiding his gaze.
“Yeah.” Tk whispers. “ Oh. ”
--
Buck gets home as Tk’s just finishing his mac ‘n cheese, Eddie having finished his a few minutes prior. He walks through the front door looking exhausted and not at all surprised that Eddie stuck around. He runs a hand through his hair and Tk immediately feels the guilt overwhelm him - he looks like hell. “There’s mac in the pot.” Tk says, putting his dish in the sink and heading slowly for the stairs. “I’m going to bed. Thanks, Eddie.”
“Night.” His brother says, not saying anything to Eddie - obviously not wanting his brother to hear him. But… Tk’s a bastard and doesn’t close the bathroom door all the way, listening in on their conversation.
They’re still speaking pretty quietly but Tk can make out enough. Murmurs of the words ‘ suspension’ and ‘ really pissed off ’ travel through the air. Tk leans in a little more. “ Athena told me to let him sleep on it, that he was just worried but… I don’t know, Eds. I think he might actually suspend me this time.”
“Well, did you tell him what happened?”
“Hell no. I’m not gonna air out my brother’s dirty laundry. That’s fucked up. He wants to get a job with the LAFD. Telling a captain all his shit would jeopardize it, even if it’s just Bobby.”
“Buck, he jeopardized your job tonight!”
“I’m not doing it, Eddie.”
Tk closes the door. He can’t hear anymore of this.
--
The next morning, he sneaks out of bed super early, gets dressed quietly and slips out the front door, ordering an Uber and setting the destination for Station 118. When he arrives, it looks like their day is just getting started and most of the team that he actually knows is there, Chim and Eddie sitting on the sofa, watching Hen play a video game. Chimney smiles at the sight of him, eyebrows furrowing together in confusion. “Tk, hey! Uh, Buck’s not in today…”
“I know.” Tk sighs a little nervously. “I’m not here for him.”
Eddie gives him a wary look. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“I have to try.” Is all Tk says on the matter. “Is he here?”
Eddie points wordlessly towards the captain’s office, the door pried open with a wooden door stopper. Tk knocks, Bobby staring down at some paperwork with a frown on his face. He looks up and almost jumps at the sight of the Strand sibling, before his face sets into a frown. “If you’re here to tell me how to do my job in favour of your brother, I’d rather you didn’t.”
“I’m not here because you’re his captain.” Tk says, stepping inside and making himself comfortable in a chair - a physical way to say you have to hear me out. i’m not leaving. “I’m here because you’re his friend. And he lied to you last night because of me. I hate that. My brother’s been taking real good care of me lately. You shouldn’t fault him for that.”
Bobby nods slowly and gestures for him to continue. Tk takes a deep breath. “Right before I showed up here, I overdosed on drugs. That’s why I’m here. And ever since I’ve got here… it’s just gray. And I just feel numb all the time . I guess I just wanted to feel something. So I went to a bar, and instead of drinking… I picked a fight. Buck got this notification from this app we have set up that told him I was somewhere that sells alcohol and he panicked. That’s why he was there. He was just being a good brother.”
By the end of it, Bobby’s face has softened at the revelation, and Tk’s certain he can see a little twinge of regret in his eyes. “Look,” Tk starts again. “My brother’s… different than I remember. He’s not happy right now, he’s closed off and he’s acting like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. And at first, I thought it was me. But now, I’m thinking it might be you.”
The captain takes in a sharp breath, hesitating before he says, “I’m just trying to protect him.”
Tk nods. “I can’t imagine how hard it must have been, seeing him under that truck. I mean, I saw it on the news but we weren’t here. He said he had enough people taking care of him. He thinks the world of you. I’m sure I can speak for myself and both my parents when I say that we’re so glad he has people looking out for him over here. I just think that right now, we should be more worried about his mental health than his physical.”
Bobby looks a little defeated, and Tk almost feels bad, but also a little enlightened that his captain does seem to care as much about Buck as everyone says he does. Bobby hums and says, “I think you’re probably right.” Tk nods curtly, and having said his piece, gets up to leave. Bobby stops him when he gets to the door. “Hey, Tk?” He turns. “I’m a year sober. Three, before that. So, if you need someone who gets it… I’m around. Family of Buck’s is family of mine.”
Tk nods, smiling softly. “Thanks, Captain.”
--
Tk returns home before Evan’s even awake.