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Adam likes going to Blake’s place when he needs to get away from it all. He doesn’t even need to go to the ranch in Tishomingo, Blake’s house in LA is enough of a retreat after a long day of filming sometimes, escaping the Hollywood bullshit and spending time with Blake’s own patented brand of bullshit, usually involving making fun of Adam. Which is why, when Blake suggests they have a movie night, Adam isn’t the least bit surprised to see a familiar DVD cover in his hand.
“Seriously, why do I let you do this to me?” Adam groans, covering his face while Blake just grins and pops the “Begin Again” disk out of its case and into the DVD player. “You aren’t really going to make me watch myself be a dick, right?”
“Relax,” Blake says. “I have to watch you be a dick all the time, it’s not that bad.” He gets a handful of popcorn in the face for the one, but Blake deflects, and plops down next to Adam on the huge l-shaped leather couch, its size a match for the theatre-size screen in front of them. With the bowl of popcorn between them, and the lights dimmed low, it’s as if they’re in their own private theatre.
“Ready?” Blake asks, remote poised to press play.
“I hate you.” Adam replies, bracing himself for a world of pain. He knows what happens in the movie, obviously, but he’s never really watched himself onscreen. It’s too weird, and, honestly, he knows he isn’t the best actor in the world. But Blake was getting way too much pleasure out of his pain, so Adam was determined to get through it.
The movie is good, there’s no denying that; Blake is visibly surprised when he hears Keira Knightley’s voice. “Damn, I like her.”
“Yeah she’s pretty awesome.” Adam says, now watching his onscreen self and Keira laugh and cuddle in the back of a car, carefree at that stage of the movie when their possibilities seemed endless. Adam looks over at Blake while he and Keira are jumping on their new bed, and Blake is, once again, grinning like an idiot. “I can’t believe you got paid for that.”
Adam laughs, “Anytime I was kissing her I felt like I should give back the paycheck! She was great.” He notices something cross Blake’s face and feels compelled to add, “Not really my type though.”
Blake looks considerably cheered up after that.
Adam only covers his eyes once, when his character comes back to the apartment after a long trip, fighting and breaking up with Keira, whilst sporting a truly ridiculous mustache. Blake chokes on his popcorn he’s laughing so hard and Adam might slap his back a little harder than necessary. As the movie progresses, there’s less of Adam and more of Mark Ruffalo’s character, which Adam doesn’t mind because Mark is awesome. The music, though, is undoubtedly his favorite part of the movie. Keira sings most of them herself, and they’re so damn catchy, he and Blake are just lost in them, tapping their feet to the beat.
Adam shows up again towards the end of the movie, again sporting tragic facial hair (“Alright it’s a fake beard, shut up!). Adam’s character put one of Keira’s songs on his new album and Blake almost loses it (“You stole her song, oh my god you asshole!”), eventually calming down enough for them to hear onscreen-Adam make a passionate plea for the heart of Keira. Adam just stares at his lap; out of the corner of his eye he can see Blake glance from the screen to himself sitting on the couch. He doesn’t stare for long, but it’s enough to make the heat rise in Adam’s cheeks.
Adam’s big song, “Lost Stars” is the hardest moment for him to get though. It’s the part of the movie where he looks most like himself, singing to the love of his life, however futile it turns out to be. Adam remembers shooting that scene; he may not be the best actor, but channeling his history of heartbreak and unrequited love? Easy. It’s ironic watching it now, given that the person Adam had been thinking about the most is also sitting next to him, now openly staring more at him than the screen.
They let the rest of the movie play out, Adam stretching while the denouement happens, grabbing new drinks for himself and Blake, who is standing when he comes back. He looks at Adam and says, “Listen, all jokes aside, that was a cool movie.”
“Oh come on,” Adam laughs. “You’re really going to let all jokes about my mustache slide?”
“Oh not a chance in hell!” Blake grins. “But it was still good. That last song is killer.”
Adam doesn’t say anything, just hands Blake his drink and sits back down on the couch. “So what else do you want to do tonight?”
The phrasing is innocent, but the look on Blake’s face is not and Adam doesn’t know what else to say; what’s been passing between them for the past few months is coming to head and they both know it. Blake looks resolved, and pops in another movie.
“What one is that?” Adam asks
“10 Things I Hate About You.” Blake says, sitting down again, the bowl of popcorn and the tension still stuck between them.
Adam’s seen it before and loves it. It’s easy, funny, a classic 90s high school rom-com. The thing he’s surprised about is how much it reminds him of himself and Blake – two ridiculous, stubborn jerks who can’t seem to get their act together. He shakes his head, putting it out of his mind now so he can still enjoy the movie. Heath Ledger singing Frankie Valli and getting chased by security never ceases to be hysterical, and he reaches for a handful of popcorn...only to get a handful of Blake instead.
“What are we, in high school?” Adam says, still holding Blake’s hand in the popcorn, awkwardly
Blake laughs. “I thought high schoolers put the popcorn over their junk.”
“Don’t get any ideas!” Adam laughs too, still holding Blake’s hand. He waits for Blake to pull away but he simply re-adjusts, interlocking his and Adam’s fingers and suddenly Adam doesn’t give a shit about the movie. He sits there for 5 minutes, 10 minutes, who knows, holding Blake’s hand and trying to not freak out. When Heath and Julia Stiles go paintballing, he catches Blake looking at him again. He returns the look and meets him halfway, inexplicably and suddenly capturing his lips in a barely there kiss.
It’s tentative, could only be that when neither of them is sure this is real, or the hallucinations of too much booze and complicated feelings. When Adam feels the pressure increase, feels Blake ask for more, he gives it to him, climbing over and sitting astride Blake’s lap, the kiss now hungry, aching, needing. It’s a kiss that has taken way too long to happen.
The popcorn is scattered everywhere, and the movie plays on in the background, and Adam makes one last mental note to send his director from “Begin Again” a huge gift basket for making this finally happen.