Chapter Text
7:53 PM
Benny: doing a B n E anyone else wanna come
Sarah: where tf are you breaking into???? WHY???
Ethan: no that’s what we call our movie nights
Benny: yea isn’t it funny
Erica: no
Sarah: no
Roryswagman201: 👍‼️🪤
Benny: WHAT THE FUCKKKKK DOES THAT MEAANDN
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Ethan: rory please
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Benny: sus
Benny: sus
Benny: sus
Roryswagman201: sus.
Roryswagman201: sus.
Ethan: sometimes I wish getting bitten by a werewolf would’ve killed me.
[Rory was the only one who went to Ethan’s house. He said sus approximately 57 times.]
6:45 AM
Benny: good morning everyone especially my bestie Sarah I have a question
Sarah: yeah what’s the question?
Benny: so can you like smell when people are on their periods??
Sarah: BENNY. FIRST OFF. JAR. SECOND OFF. MOVE OUT OF WHITECHAPEL. I AM GOING TO DROPKICK YOU TO THE MOON IF I SEE YOU.
Benny: no fair enough since I’m dead either way now do vamps even have periods?? Bc in those dusk movies she like gave birth and don’t u need to have a period to give birth
Sarah: $20.
Erica: I’m gonna ignore everything besides the last sentence. She was still a human everyone fuckin knows that idiot
Benny: rude.
Benny: WAIT $20??? I WAS GONNA WALK TO GET SOMETHING OTHER THAN SCHOOL FOOD WITH THAT $20 NOOOO
Sarah: maybe if you didn’t say dumb shit we wouldn’t have the jar
Ethan: what the fuck did I come back to
Erica: what’s the jar
Ethan: it’s for whenever Benny asks something stupid he has to put money in a jar
Ethan: it becomes a higher amount if it’s related to the supernatural or something he has to ask a vampire specifically
Erica: that thing must be full!! Where is it.
Ethan: no fuck off
Roryswagman201: 👻🐶🌪🛢🗝
Erica: god rory thank you I’ll give you at least $25
Benny: did rory just doxx the jar and did Erica just understand him.
Ethan: dude blondes are terrifying
Roryswagmaster201: poland
Benny: WHAAATT DOES SS THAT MENWAB RORYU
Sarah: see you at school Benny.
[after school]
Ethan: SARAH. THE BRUISE YOU LEFT IS HUGE
Sarah: he deserved it
Sarah: that was like 20% of my strength lmao wimp
Benny: &/:$:!?)/? ?:?/?/? ARM DOTN WORK ANYMORE!?
Ethan: B, you can still move it you’re perfectly fine
Benny: FOCKIJN HURTTTTTS
Ethan: best part was when his grandma saw it and I told her what happened she just laughed, jabbed it, laughed more
Erica: kinda girlboss ngl
Ethan: he won’t stop bitching he made me get him ice
Benny: I literally see the light.
Ethan: the sun is in your eyes.
Ethan: that message was a mistake he’s being dramatic again
Sarah: yeah? :)
Ethan: yeah. He went to slide under my bed and fell right on the bruise and is now just yelling
Sarah: :DD!!!
Ethan: it’s impressive how long he can go in not gonna lie
Roryswagman201: :( 👎
Benny: thank you for the compassion ror
Roryswagman201: L 🤣
Benny: WHAT THE FUCK!! Why is everyone here bennyphobic
Erica: you’re saying that like there’s someone who’s bennysexual
Benny: THERE ARE!!!!
Erica: you have absolutely zero bitches
Ethan: [audio message of a muffled Benny wailing]
Sarah: tough day for the little man huh smh can’t catch a break
Ethan: he doesn’t deserve one
Benny: my blood is so scrumptious why doesn’t anyone want me........
Ethan: YOU WANT TO BE SUCKED DRY???
Benny: I wouldn’t complain :lipbite:
Erica: this is exactly why nobody, not even vampires, want you.
Benny: everyone says ohhhh don’t change for anyone but when it comes to me everyone’s like Benny maybe if you weren’t the way you are someone would like you :(
Ethan: people obviously like you why would we talk to you otherwise
Benny: ew Fuck off
Erica: Ethan :/ I’m literally in it for Sarah
Benny: then why do you hang out with me and Rory and genuinely have a good time >:)
Erica: ..
Erica: for charity? Obviously.
Benny: uh huh :)
Roryswagman201: ‼️‼️🪤💥
JEDIKNIGHTS o7
8:46 PM
Benny: boys we all know Sarah and Erica like have a fling yes
Ethan: we aren’t stupid
Roryswagman201: 🦧
Benny: based?
Benny: ANYWAY! They will never make a move unless. We do something about it
Ethan: how.
Benny: Erica wants dusk irl and Sarah wants um. Uhhhhhhh
Ethan: get to the point
Benny: SO BASICALLY I FOUND THIS POTION! TRUTH SERUM TYPE STUFF YEAH
Ethan: B we don’t have to use magic for everything
Ethan: we could just convince them into asking each other out
Benny: they are so stubborn and will see it as just normal hanging out
Benny: just like Sarah did every single time you asked her out
Ethan: FUCK YOU?
Benny: I’m not wrong
Benny: anywayy I suppose we could come up with something else :/
Roryswagman201: Shakespeare
Benny: no fuck that bald bastard.
Ethan: how are we supposed to come up with something romantic. We’re us.
Benny: wdym I’m a total romantic
Ethan: you brought a dog back from the dead for a girl
Benny: yeah, shows how dedicated and committed I am
Roryswagman201: cowboys
Benny: thank you Rory! I am exactly like a cowboy
Ethan: IN WHAT WAY??
Benny: hot, brave, and strong
Ethan: no I don’t think so
Ethan: ANYWAY. I think we shouldn’t push it not really our place
Roryswagman201: die
Ethan: RORY???
Benny: guess this is a job for the Rorster and the Wizard
Erica & Ethan
11:43 AM
Erica: why does your tall counterpart keep looking at me I thought he was over that
Ethan: he is he’s doing something stupid
Erica: WELL MAKE HIM STOP HE’S MAKING HIS EVIL FACE AT ME
Ethan: yeah he does that
Ethan: just between you and me who are you crushing on atm ? :)
Erica: nononono. You’re both being weird I fucking hate geeks what’s going on
[LUNCH]
Ethan sat down at the table, looking towards the obvious empty seats. “Where are Sarah and Erica?” Benny laughed, “They’re avoiding me and Rory, our plan is working!”
Ethan just stared at the two, completely dumbfounded. “Why would we want that.” “Because they’re going to spend way more time together, totally going to confess their love,” Rory wiggled his eyebrows and Ethan groaned. “I don’t think that’s how it works.”
It didn’t work, Ethan was right, they do not understand romance.
[Back to the main gc]
Sarah: what is wrong with you guys today?? Possession??
Ethan: Benny and Rory maybe but I’m perfectly fine
Erica: ARE YOU?? SAY SOMETHING ONLY ETHAN WOULD SAY??
Ethan: I don’t know what I would say??
Erica: no yeah Ethan is good
Sarah: okay but what about the other two
Ethan: they aren’t possessed, just uh doing something
Sarah: WHAT ARE THEY DOING?? THEY NEED TO QUIT
Roryswagman201: ✂️
Benny: RORRYEWQQYQQAAWJHHWHWHN
Ethan: Rory. Thin ice.
Erica: .... what the fuck does that mean
Sarah: Erica you always understand him but NOW???
Roryswagman201: 💌📦🎀🎊🔑🪦
Erica: okay that was kind of beautiful but what is the context.
Roryswagman201: 👱♀️👩🏽
Erica: why is the blonde emoji hot
Erica: like seriously I want her so bad
Benny: does the emoji movie turn you on Erica
Erica: NO WHAT THE FUCK
Benny: bet she reads jailbreak x readers
Erica: WHO THE FUCK IS JAILBREAK???
Roryswagman201: 🫁
Sarah: I’ve still gotten 0 answers??:? Fucks wrong with all of you.
Benny: do you think anyone has ever fucked with the emoji movie in the background
Sarah: JAR
Ethan: JAR
Erica: JAR