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He’s surrounded by red. Red sticks with white in the middle and three letters on the white.
He’s not sure where he is but he can feel metal rub his wrists raw. He shivers once he realizes his jacket is missing.
His ears ring and he can see mouths moving but he can’t hear it. Why can’t he hear it ? What are they saying ?
He sees the red around him light and the fuse on each draws closer and closer.
He can see someone jerk forward.
It’s grey for a while. His lungs seem to have shriveled up in his chest and refuse to work. Why can’t he breathe ?
The smoke clears and he can see blond hair, where was he again ?
He tilted to look at his stomach only to find debris lodged into his gut.
Is he dying?
No, He can’t be dying, Can he?
>><<
Scott wakes up with a start, a painful ringing in his ears and bile in his throat. He can barely make it over his bed before he’s heaving and emptying his stomach.
Sweat on his forehead caused hair to cling on, hot and fat tears adding and blurring his vision.
It was dark in his room, too dark. His skin itched and he raked his nails over the pale flesh until it was pink and raw, red beads visible.
Where was he? Why can’t he breathe ? Where was the blond man ? Jimmy ?
He let out what felt like a pitiful wail and curled in on himself, nails digging into the raw skin.
Scott can feel the door slam open and he flinches at the vibration.
He registers the light from a lantern before someone gently pries his hands from his arms, holding his hands as if they were afraid he’d break.
Did he deserve such gentle touch ?
He’s not sure.
His vision was blurred but he could make out blond hair. The blond haired man was back, Jimmy. It was Jimmy.
Scott sobbed in relief and clung to him, a mix of tears and snot dampening his shirt but the younger didn’t seem to mind and just rubbed comforting circles into his back.
The ringing in his ears dulled as his mind cleared. He felt less foggy.
His breathing was still shaky, but it’d evened out to a less worrying pattern, the circles on his back never going away.
His nose pressed against the three hearts on Jimmy’s neck. It was his most comforting position when he was with the blond. He felt secure there. Head tucked away and body held in a secure yet gentle hold.
He wishes he could hear Jimmy’s voice. He desperately wanted to;
He wanted to hear him say it’d be okay and that he was there.
He wanted to hear him laugh again.
He wanted to hear Jimmy tell him how much he loved him and how cool all of his scars are.
He wants to hear Jimmy again.
Life is cruel isn’t it ?
He knows this as he can only feel the soft hands, and not hear the words.
It’s frustrating. He can’t find any way to express it besides taking it out on the tree outside his house.
Chunks chipped away from the brutal swings of his axe and he’s surprised it’s not fallen down yet.
It’s almost like it’s waiting for something. He’s not sure what though.
He pushes the thought away and focuses on the man he’s laying on. His nightshirt was just a t- shirt with Captain America’s shield in the middle.
It almost made Scott chuckle at just how Jimmy it was.
The blond shifts and pushes him back gently, scribbling on a notebook before handing it to him.
‘ bad night ? ‘
It made Scott chuckle bitterly and he nodded, wiping at the tears on his cheeks.
Blue eyes softened as he wrote something else before standing.
‘ Have to clean the floor, I’ll come lay with you after <3 ‘
The cyanette smiles fondly and watches him clean swiftly, tripping once or twice eliciting a giggle from the seated one.
The blond also bandaged his arms, although barely damaged. What happened to them is hazy in his mind but the skin under his nails tells him what he needs to know.
A gentle kiss is pressed to his temple as he’s pulled to lay down. The light from the lantern diminished between two fingers.
Three taps on the younger’s back is what helps him doze off. A thing they've picked up to say ‘ I love you ‘ discreetly. Whether it’s three taps or squeezes, it’s a silent reassurance.
A smile paints his lips and he lets himself fall asleep fully.
This is nice.