Chapter Text
"Lisa, I have a question."
"Ask away, Cutie!"
"Is it a requirement for the captains of the Knights of Favonius to be hot?" Lisa almost spat out the tea she was drinking as she saw Lumine lean back to stare out the window of the library.
"Is it tactical? A way to distract the enemy with their good looks? Is it to get more recruits? Because if your captain is hot...I mean at least training won't be boring."
"Archons...You're actually serious."
"Of course I am!"
"I mean it makes sense. You don't have to ever advertise that you're looking for more knights cause who wouldn't want to work with Kaeya or Albedo or Eula." Lumine sighed. "And of course the grandmaster and former captain is Jean."
Lumine watched Kaeya and Eula training outside, guiding the new recruits with some sparing matches and she squinted. "Or do you become hot once you are a captain? Like is there a secret inauguration where they like put a spell on you to make you more attractive?"
"Cutie..is there a reason--Do you want to become captain?"
"Too much responsibility and it'd be impossible if I'm a traveler."
"I mean you are already an honorary--"
"So, is it like a process to become captain? Like I can see that they have the skills to back it up..But is it also a pretty people contest? If so, why aren't you a captain?"
With that Lisa blushed. "Do you think I'm pretty?"
Lumine raised a brow before raising the teacup to her lips and watching Kaeya help with someone's form. "It's weird...All of the captains are hot. Almost offensively. Oh! It must be so that people would underestimate them, right? So that they would put their guard down and not think of them as a threat."
"You're really thinking hard on this."
"It's just--They are all...so....hot."
"Whose hot?"
Albedo walked into the library with a book in hand before placing it on top of a pile. "Has someone caught your eye, Lumine?"
"Yes." She sighed before pinching the bridge of her nose. "You're one of them."
Albedo's eyes widened slightly. Slightly taken back by her honesty. A small smirk appeared before he leaned one hand on the table and towards the blonde traveller. "Am I? You think I'm hot?"
Lumine looked at him before groaning and dragging a hand down her face. "You know you're hot. That's another thing...The captains all know they are hot."
"You're talking about the captains of the knights?"
"All of you. Like it has to be a ploy. There has to be a reason why all of you are so attractive? You all have your own version of attractiveness and you know it."
"Oh, do we?"
"Don't do that."
"Do what?"
"You are looking at me and it's making me get nervous."
"Do I make you nervous, Lumine?" Albedo couldn't help but be amused by the red tint of her ears as she looked away and finished off her tea.
"I think it's to disarm one's opponent. It has to be..."
Albedo's smile only grew as he watched her nervously pick at her dress. "It bugs me."
"That we are all hot?"
"That you aren't even pyro users. Hell Eula and Kaeya have cyro visions and you...I swear you are immune to the cold with all that time you spend in the mountains."
"I don't think visions and attractiveness are associated."
"I know but it seems almost too ironic that two cyro captains are some of the most attractive people I've met and I've met quite a lot of people."
"You have."
"And you..."
"And me?"
"Albedo. I'm pretty sure you know you're good-looking."
"I will not deny it."
"God...and If I said that to Kaeya or Eula they'd say the same thing. The captains know...thus it must be a requirement. It's the only way you can become a captain of the knights."
"One," She lifted a finger. "You have to be skilled. Obviously. Two, you have to be willing to help others." She glared at the Alchemist. "And three, you have to be incredibly good-looking and know it. Almost annoyingly attractive."
"Do we annoy you?"
"Sometimes."
"Really?"
"Not really. It's quite nice to watch you all train...to just watch you.I don't know, pretty people are just nice to look at I guess, and...I guess if helps the knights..."
"Well, Lumine, you're also skilled, you're willing to help others, and you're attractive. So, by that standard, you can also be a captain."
"I don't want that responsibility."
"What sort of responsibility?" Lumine turned her head and saw Kaeya and Eula enter the library, sweat dripping from their foreheads as they wiped it with a towel.
"Lumine thinks all the captains are hot and that it must be a plan crafted by the Knights."
"Tell me I'm wrong."
"You're not wrong." Kaeya said with an amused grin before putting an arm around Albedo. "We are quite an attractive bunch."
"That doesn't mean it's a requirement. It's a coincidence if anything." Eula said softly before smiling at Lumine. Lumine blinked a few times before shaking her head.
"Not possible. It's too--No. There has to be a reason. Maybe it's the title. Authority is hot. You have the hierarchy, the power..maybe that just...increases your attractiveness level. Aghh!" She ran her hands through her hair before getting up. "I'm going to go take a shower. My head hurts."
"I can always join you, cutie."
"Or any of us hot captains can too."
Lumine glared over her shoulder and shook her head. "If I look at you lot anymore I might go insane. I swear..maybe this is why they have to be hot."
Albedo waited until the door closed and looked at the teapot before back at the librarian. "An aphrodisiac?"
Lisa smiled. "Just some brandy. She was tense and stressed after the festival. And I thought it would take the edge of..I didn't know she'd be so...honest?" She hid a small grin behind her hand.
"Well, it boosted my confidence."
"Do you think she's thinking about us while she's showering?"
"If she was thinking about you three while having tea, she's thinking about you three in the shower." Lisa said before finishing her cup and placing it on the tray.
"You should tell her."
"Tell her what? That her conspiracy that the captains have to be hot is true?"
"Yes."
"I mean it's not an actual requirement...It's just..."
"It's an unspoken truth."
"It's not like we applied to be captains..it just..was placed on our shoulders."
The three captains and Lisa all stared at the door with a slightly amused smile before looking at each other. "Yeah I guess we are an attractive bunch."
"It is helpful when we want to get recruits."
"And it makes the enemy think that we are just a pretty face."