Chapter Text
Part 1
~~
Hi Lixie Pixie, it’s your favourite roommate Jisung~ I don’t know when you’ll find this note, but either way I’ll be long gone. I didn’t leave the country, just the state, but I’m not telling you where, sorry angel, but I don’t really want anyone chasing after me. And I don’t mean this in a bad way.
Don’t worry, I’m not alone, I’ve left with Hyunjinnie. I needed space, this whole Minho situation has me… messier than usual. I just need some time to clear my head. I got the idea from you actually. Remember when you and Binnie told me that the best way to move on from this crush and stop hurting was to get some space?
This probably wasn’t what you had in mind. I’m sorry, but you know I’m impulsive and dramatic. Jinnie is kind of in the same boat as me. He didn’t tell me what happened last night, with the whole Innie situation, but he needed space too. That’s why we’ve left. We’ve also blocked everyone. It’s nothing personal I promise. It’s just… we don’t want to be reached by Minho or Innie… and to be honest, even one call from any of you would probably have us running straight back.
We’ll only be gone a month, and we’ll spend the rest of the break making it up to you <3 I already miss you loads Lixie. Take care of yourself, tell the others we said hi and to take care too. Have lots of fun you guys, this is your one chance to have the time of your life without me annoying you all lol. We miss all of you and we’ll be back before you know it.
With Much Love,
Jisungie <333
****
llama jinnie >> kangachris
llama jinnie: hi channie hyung, idk what time it is in australia so idk when you’ll get this. the later the better ig. when you left i promised that i’d take care of innie until you came back. i’m sorry but i can’t do it. i thought i could but i can’t. i know you won’t be back for another month, and you kinda trusted me, but he’ll be fine hyung. he’s smart and he’s got all of the others looking out for him as well. i never told you but i kinda had a crush on innie for a long time. i was scared to do anything because you’re kinda protective (understandably, since he’s your brother and all). you, innie, and seungminnie, have been in my lives for so long. and i never wanted to lose any of you so i never said anything. but i can’t do it anymore. i’m not confessing or anything, don’t worry. but i can’t keep being around him and pretending that these feelings don’t exist, it feels like i’m letting you down somehow. so i’m sorry.
llama jinnie: it’s kinda funny… i guess i ended up losing you both either way.
****
block kangachris? yes
****
(Saturday Night, 3 Hours Ago)
Hyunjin found Jisung sitting cross-legged on the floor of their dorm’s communal kitchen with the lights off. He blinked. He briefly considered turning on the lights, but instead sat down in front of him. The tear tracks on Jisung’s cheeks were barely visible in the non-existent lighting, but Hyunjin caught them.
“What’s up with you?”
Jisung snorted, a little congested. “What’s up with you?” he shot back.
That was fair, considering Hyunjin’s own matching tear tracks.
“I have a major crush on Innie, and I can’t take care of him the way Channie hyung wants me to.” Hyunjin blurted, “I feel like I’m letting him down.”
Jisung’s eyebrows furrowed. “You know Chan hyung would never hate you for something like that.” his eyes narrowed perceptively, “this isn’t just about your crush is it?”
Hyunjin hesitated.
“Are you worried that you can’t live up to Channie hyung’s expectations?”
Hyunjin should’ve known that Jisung would figure it out quickly. It was true though, there was a certain kind of burden that came with the trust that Chan had given him, and Hyunjin found himself crumbling underneath it.
“You’re not pathetic Hyunjin,” Jisung said. “You just have a lot going on right now. Your head is all over the place.”
Jisung was right. “I’m scared. We’re almost about to graduate and go out into the real world and I’m scared that I won’t meet anybody’s expectations. Not just his. I feel like shit. I feel like I’m letting everyone down.”
“I get that.” Jisung sighed. He lets his head fall back. He looked back at Hyunjin. “Do you want to run away with me?”
Hyunjin blinked again. “What?”
“Run away with me,” Jisung repeated, stronger this time. “I spent the past three hours crying. Because I’m scared of the future. Because I’m scared of heartbreak. You know I have that crush on Minho hyung right?” he didn’t wait for Hyunjin’s nod, “Changbin and Felix have been telling me to take some space, so I can move on without hurting myself. Last night was ridiculous. I fell asleep crying to Love, Actually.”
Ah right, Hyunjin thought, last night. They were playing truth or dare at some party and Hyunjin remembered how Jisung’s face had fallen briefly when Minho had vaguely friendzoned him again.
“You think space will help you?” Hyunjin asked now.
“It’s the only thing I haven’t tried yet,” Jisung chuckled bitterly. He sits up, “it isn’t like a run away forever. I just mean, let’s get away from here for like a month. Focus on ourselves, do some selfcare. Get out of heads and refresh. You and I are both so scared of the reactions and expectations of everyone that’s around us right now, so what if we just… left for a bit. So we didn’t have those weighing on us for a little while?”
It wasn’t exactly a perfect logic, it possibly wasn’t the healthiest coping mechanism, but Hyunjin saw the appeal.
“Let’s run away.” He agreed.
“Now?”
“Now. I’ll go pack my bag.”
Jisung’s face brightened. “I’ll get mine too, meet you outside?”
“Okay.”
****
welcome to chan’s kitchen [catdad, spearmint, mongmong and 3 others]
saturday
dramallama left the group
hantaro left the group
sunday
2:34pm
chanathan: does anyone know where jinnie is????
chanathan: [screenshot.jpg]
chanathan: i just got these messages from him but i think he blocked me
chanathan: …. i know it’s a sunday afternoon there but how are you a l l asleep still
2:46pm
mongmong: idk where he is, i just checked our room and he isn’t here?
spearmint: hello what’s going on acc nvm i’ll scroll up brb
spearmint: how did we lose the tallest person here
spearmint : also why did sung leave the gc too?
chanathan: i didn’t even notice that they both left the gc
catdad: what the fuck. wait does anybody know where sungie is then????
spearmint: i havent seen him since yesterday
mongmong: same
mongmong: @angelixie? is he still at your guys’ room?
2:58pm
angelixie: hello hello what’s going on?
angelixie: uh no, sung isn’t here… i don’t know where he would be?
catdad: i can’t reach him
catdad: i think he?? blocked me????
babybread: i just woke up what’s all the noise
3:04pm
babybread: hyunjin hyung has feelings for me? that’s why he left?
babybread: wait no. chan hyung, you told him to??? what??? babysit me???
spearmint: oh boy
chanathan: wait no- it wasn’t like that i swear, i didn’t know
chanathan: he’s practically family innie, i just told him to take care of you since i couldn’t
chanathan: i didn’t know that he’d think i wouldn’t approve of this or smth
chanathan: innie if you guys had feelings for each other then you know i wouldn’t intrude
babybread: idk what i feel and now i can’t even talk to him cos nobody knows where he is
babybread: why did he just leave like that
mongmong: maybe he was scared. maybe he kept getting the wrong message. maybe he felt burdened. maybe he needed space.
chanathan: um-
mongmong: sorry it’s just, chan surely you must understand how he felt? he just didn’t want to let you down. you know how much he looks up to you, and yeah maybe he should’ve spoken to you guys first, but you can’t pin this all on him.
chanathan: i know, you’re right. i didn’t mean to
babybread: sorry hyung
mongmong: let’s just find him first
catdad: and jisung?? hello???
spearmint: maybe they’re both together, that would make sense
angelixie: guys i just found a note, from sungie.
angelixie: [picture.png]
3:18pm
chanathan: well that’s… slightly relieving ig, i just wish i could talk to them
catdad: jisung has a crush on me
spearmint: …. oh boy part 2
catdad: you knew about this???
spearmint: i mean… who didn’t?
catdad: a l l of you knew?? and nobody told me.
angelixie: it wasn’t our place hyung
catdad: he wasn’t even going to tell me was he? and you and changbin. you told him to move on
spearmint: you’ve said it yourself that you don’t see him like that
spearmint: he’s been hurting for so long, we’re just trying to look out for him
catdad: i didn’t know
mongmong: does it change anything??
catdad is typing
catdad: i don’t know
spearmint: maybe while hyunjin and jisung are taking some space to clear their heads
spearmint: maybe you two should take some time to clear yours
mongmong: people don’t just sit around waiting. don’t take them for granted.
chanathan: everyone take a breather and cool off. listen to binnie, clear your heads.
****
Juyeon Dance Club >> MinhoLee
Juyeon Dance Club: hey how come you didn’t join hyunjin and that friend of yours on their vacay trip?
MinhoLee: ??? how did you know about that??
Juyeon Dance Club: uhh?? their travel vlog?? i think most of the music dpt and dance club has seen it lol
Juyeon Dance Club sent a link
MinhoLee: oh… thanks
MinhoLee: and uh… I didn’t know they were leaving
Juyeon Dance Club: oh… my bad dude
MinhoLee: it’s fine
****
welcome to chan’s kitchen [angelixie, spearmint, mongmong and 3 others]
4:57pm
catdad: i got a message from a friend, those two are posting travel vlogs apparently
catdad sent a link
catdad: i figured it might be a bit… idk relieving to see them in one piece… since we can’t talk to them yet
chanathan:
thanks minho