Work Text:
The train ride there was peaceful. There were hardly any passengers in his car as he’d taken the earliest possible time. So the air was cool and the colors around him washed out and calm. The sky was breaking as the first signs of day rose.
Shibata yawned while he clutched his travel bag to his chest. His beanie hung low over his ears where earphones were perched, though the music had stopped an hour ago.
He worried vaguely, that if he fell asleep, he wouldn’t wake up once they got to his stop, but this didn’t stop him and he dozed off.
When he woke up, he jumped in his seat, twisted around to see where he was and, flustered now, pulled down his luggage from above him and hurried out of the train just as the doors were closing. He counted himself lucky that he’d only gone a few ways away from where he was supposed to get off.
Paying extra at the station, he juggled with his phone as he dialed Natsume’s number and counted out money simultaneously. He stuck the phone between his ear and shoulder before he realized his earphones were still in and he pulled them roughly off.
“What was it, 500 yen? It can’t be 500 yen, my stop was literally just one block down— I know, it’s an exaggeration!” He paid the money anyway cause the girl was pretty and a bit moody because of the early morning.
“This is Natsume Takashi’s phone, I’m sorry I can’t answer at the moment. I’ll call back as soon as possible. Please leave a message and have a good day.”
“Yo, Natsume! Your voicemail is way too polite. I didn’t think you’d be the type of person to forget to pick me up from the station, though I missed my stop. You should’ve called me, call me back immediately. Oh, and don’t worry, I’ll get a taxi ride back, just wait at the station. I’ll see you soon.”
But when he got there, nobody was waiting for him.
He checked his watch and looked up and down the street for any sign of an approaching, entirely too skinny figure and his ever present cat, but he didn’t see anything.
“There’s no way he actually forgot right?” he mumbled as he tried calling again.
When Natsume’s voicemail picked up again, he frowned. No dice.
He flicked through his contacts and found Tanuma’s number.
“Hello…?”
“Yo, Tanuma. Sorry about calling you so early.”
“Shibata?” There was a sound of shifting as he only assumed the guy was getting up from his bed. “Oh, right. You were going to come over.”
“Yeah, about that. Do you think you can try calling Natsume for me?”
Tanuma’s voice instantly became alert. “Why? Did something happen?”
Shibata shook his head, “No, don’t panic. The jerk probably overslept or something.”
There was a pause.
“Doesn’t sound like him, huh?” Shibata ran a hand through his hair. “Just, call him for me would you?”
“Yeah, I’ll call back.”
But instead of calling back, Tanuma arrived at the station with the cat on his shoulder.
Shibata met him halfway and made him catch his breath, offering some water.
“Natsume—! Natsume’s been missing,” Tanuma panted, “since last night.”
He looked over at the cat, looking uncharacteristically irked and worried. “Shit.”
“Sensei already has people looking, and I’ve called Taki to come and help.” Tanuma seized Shibata’s overnight bag. “We’ll drop these off at my house and start looking.”
“What about the Fujiwaras?”
“Natsume left early to pick you up and then he stopped by my house as far as they know.”
The age-old excuse. Shibata’s sure the couple has known something was up, yet never questioned it.
“You kids should look in the city,” Sensei told them at Tanuma’s house. “We’re covering the forest.”
“Nishimura and Kitamoto can do that. We’ll be more useful in the forest,” Tanuma said, grabbing a coat from the closet and pulling on hiking boots.
“You told them?” Shibata hissed.
“We need as many people looking for him as possible.” He handed him a coat. “Don’t worry, I didn’t tell them the truth.”
“Natsume’s not gonna like that...”
“Well, he’ll have to deal with it.”
“You said, we’d be useful in the forest,” Shibata said as they sped walked away from Tanuma’s house, “you and that girl might be, but I’m not from around here, hello.”
“Then you can join the others in the city,” he said absentmindedly as he dialed what Shibata assumed as the girl’s number.
“Alright.” Shibata hated what he was going to say next. “And where’s that?”
Tanuma was worried and flustered enough, he could tell, and Shibata’s cluelessness wasn’t helping. But he couldn’t help it, he wasn’t familiar enough with the area.
Tanuma sighed. “Maybe you should stay at the temple.”
“Sure.” Like that was going to happen. But instead of arguing about it and stalling the search and rescue mission, Shibata was going to take matters into his own hands. Once the others had left, he searched the temple.
“Sorry about this, Tanuma.” Shibata clapped his hands together and bowed, “The heavens might punish me for this but fuck it.”
He took the purification salt from the temple.
He took the road into the forest. The gravel crunching under his feet and the trees moaning overhead, and the deeper he went, the more these two sounds clashed in dissonance.
Whenever he felt shivers up his spine or one of his limbs grew numb, he sprinkled the salt around and above him like glitter.
He kept calling Natsume’s phone, more to ground him than anything, because the longer he was there, the more he felt like he was losing himself.
When he heard it, it took him forever to realize what it was. Forgetting the long established rule to never stray off the road, he dashed into the trees, which seemed to part as if they didn’t want to touch him.
“Natsume?” he called out and realized he hadn’t used his voice in awhile.
Natsume’s phone was under a few twigs and leaves. And it stopped ringing once Shibata picked it up.
The relief of picking up any trail to Natsume was overshadowed by the fact that the phone was without its owner.
He fumbled with his phone, “I should contact the others.”
“Eh…?”
All of his contacts were being erased one by one. “W-Wait a second! Are you serious!”
He went to his recents and even those were being erased. “You’ve gotta be shitting me!”
And finally, the phone’s battery died.
Shibata now realized his hands were trembling. After checking Natsume’s phone, he confirmed the loss of battery there as well.
“Oooookay.” He strained a smile. “Ooookay, asshole. You asked for it.”
He shoved his phone into the salt. He grinned triumphantly. “How about that!”
When he pulled it out again, nothing had changed, except that his phone was now thoroughly seasoned.
Sulking now, he considered going back and getting the others himself, but something told him if he left, he’d never find the place again.
“Can I bribe ayakashi?” he mumbled. “Maybe it’s possible…”
Shibata lifted up the pack of chips he’d packed (also stolen from Tanuma). “Oh, almighty ghostie! I’m willing to part with this delicious pack of chips if you help me find Natsume!”
Silence.
He sighed, defeated. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.”
He rose from the ground and pocketed both his and Natsume’s useless phones inside his pocket.
“Now, which way to go.”
He stepped forward before something caught his eye. He seized up and didn’t dare breathe.
Words were slowly being written through the dirt:
You shouldn’t be here, child of man. Be scarce of this place.
Oh fuck me.
Shibata gulped and scrounged up the courage to speak. “I’m looking for a friend.”
Your friend is gone.
“Okay, where would he be if he’s gone?”
Don’t be cheeky with me, brat.
“It’s a fair question,” he smirked. “I’m not leaving without him.”
Then you will both be lost forever.
“Can you please tell me?”
There was nothing long enough for him to wonder if the yokai had left. But when a line toward his left was drawn in the dirt, he left the potato chips where he stood and dashed in the direction it pointed.
Looking back, Shibata found it silly and stupid to have trusted any yokai, but in the moment, he’d been desperate and he’d finally gotten an answer.
He was careful to stomp his feet into the dirt, trying to leave as many tracks as possible, swatting at trees so their leaves would fall, crushing through the bushes. He sprinkled salt everywhere.
“Natsume! Natsume! Answer me!”
“...Shibata?”
A smile cracked his face and he stopped in his tracks, searching furiously. “Natsume?”
“Is that you, Shibata?”
A blaze of white in the thick of green flared out and Shibata scaled the steep but small dive down back to the road. “Natsume! You lost smartass!”
“Shibata…” Natsume’s relieved smile slowly dropped and he took an apprehensive step back. “How did you get here?”
“Well, somebody didn’t pick me up-- never mind that, do you have any idea how worried you made us?” Shibata looked him over, “You look fine at least. Natsume?”
When he’d taken a step forward, Natsume had scurried back.
“What’s the matter?”
His face had gone pallid. “Who are you? What did you do to my friend?”
“What?” Shibata made a move to reach for him.
As Natsume jerked backward, he shrank and his clothes changed. His wrist was thin and boney in Shibata’s grip and he gawked at the now young, pre-teen Natsume, a good head smaller than he once was.
The pair stared at each other, one in shock, another in terror.
Natsume began to struggle. “L-Let go of me! Let go of me, please!”
“Whoa, wait a second!”
Natsume shook off his grip and stumbled into the forest.
“Oi, Natsume!” Shibata went after him.
Natsume could run when he wanted to and he seemed to know how to navigate through a forest better than a city-dweller like Shibata could. He kept calling out to him, telling him he wouldn’t hurt him.
“Come on, man! I don’t get what’s happening, let’s talk it out!”
“Get away!”
Shibata was finally closing the distance as his stamina got the better of Natsume, and when Natsume cried out and he saw the kid falling, he dove and wrapped his arms around him as they both rolled down the hill.
Shibata grabbed at the trees to slow their fall, the skin on his hand ripping while the other clung tight to the kid.
He finally managed to grab onto the limb of a tree. He let out the breath he’d been holding and grunted as he pulled Natsume up. “Climb it. Hurry.”
When his friend was safe on the trunk of the tree, Shibata felt a crack and his branch snapped.
He saw Natsume’s face grow smaller and smaller.
The next thing he heard was someone calling his name, and then a burning pain through his leg.
“Shibata! Shibata!”
“...Natsume?” he groaned.
“Oh thank god, Shibata…”
“You’re not a kid anymore.” Shibata tried to sit up but the pain made spots cloud his eyes. HE closed his eyes and endured the vertigo until it faded. “Wow, ow...”
“I can’t believe you came! You impulsive idiot!”
This wasn’t the teary eyed, grateful attitude Shibata had been expecting.
“Wait a second, this is all wrong. Shouldn’t I be the one who should be yelling at you?” he demanded. “You’re the one who was lost!”
“I wasn’t,” Natsume made a frustrated sound, “lost! I was just stuck! Besides, who wanders into the forest alone!”
Shibata scoffed, “Apparently you!”
“You didn’t need to look for me. And now... you’re hurt.” The last word came out close to a sob.
Shibata saw the sad puppy dog look on his face and sighed. “Look, it’s okay, it’s just a broken bone.”
“Are you sure you’re fine?”
“I’m not fine, I’m Shibata.”
Natsume cracked a smile and smacked him lightly on the arm. “How lame.”
“You laughed!”
“Yeah, and I hate it.” Natsume took in a deep breath. “Do you think you can move? We should get out of here as soon as possible.”
“Right.”
Natsume helped him stand and steadied him. He wrapped his arm around his shoulders and they carefully set off.
“Hey.”
“Hm?”
“What was up before? When it looked like you didn’t recognize me.”
Natsume frowned as he recalled back. “It looked like a yokai had stolen your face.”
“What?! My face?” Shibata made a smug expression. “I mean, they’d have good taste.”
Natsume chose to ignore the last statement.
“And then what about the miniaturization you went through right after.”
“What?”
“You turned into a kid.”
“I did what?”
“You don’t remember?”
“No…” Natsume’s eyes grew distant.
“Anyway, don’t do it again.” Natsume helped him over some rocks. “I’m not good with kids.”
His friend suddenly froze up and his grip on Shibata’s waist tightened.
“An ayakashi,” he whispered. “Close your eyes.”
Shibata did immediately, trusting as Natsume guided him. Something sickly warm passed over him, almost like he’d stepped through a humid day.
“It’s okay now.”
Natsume’s hands were shaking. Shibata reached over and ruffled his hair.
“Hey!” Natsume glared up at him. “What was that for?”
“Because you’re cute.”
He gave him an exasperated look. “Huh?”
“You don’t need to be scared, Natsume. We’ll be okay.”
His face fell. “I would never forgive myself…”
“If I get eaten?” Shibata winced. “Yeah, let’s not get to that point.”
“I’m serious, Shibata!”
“I am too.” He frowned. “How did you even get here?”
“Some low-ranked yokai came to see me. Their forest had been taken over by an evil spirit.”
“Wow, you’re doing big stuff now.”
“The next thing I knew,” Natsume skirted them around a fallen log, “sensei wasn’t with me anymore… Shibata, if you keep heading straight, you’ll get out. I might not be able to help you at some point.”
“What do you mean?”
“Aah...” Natsume smiled apologetically, “the evil yokai is sort of sucking out my spirit.”
“What?!” Shibata ceased their walking, making the dumbass almost slip on some fallen leaves. “Oi, Natsume!”
He laughed uneasily, “It all just happened so fast. That’s probably why I turned into a kid. Sorry.”
“Sorry?” Shibata scoffed. “Natsume, you…!”
“If we get out, I’m sure I’ll be okay. But you’ll have to deal with me before that happens. Take good care of me, okay?”
Shibata knew what he meant even though the idea was preposterous. Suddenly, he grew sick of the forest around them, hated the thick spines of trees, the neverending sight of brown and green. The forest had to break at some point, but it had to be now, or soon.
Out of everything he could say, every witty quip, everything he wanted to yell about, fell from his lips at the sight of Natsume’s pallid expression and clear, pleading eyes. Instead, he managed out in a small but strong voice, “yeah, of course, leave it to me.”
They walked and walked and walked, and each step they took, Natsume’s hands grew smaller, his shoulders shrunk and his head started to tuck under Shibata’s arm.
There finally came a time when Natsume stopped in his tracks and looked around in confusion. “Who are you? Where are we?”
“I’m your friend. We got lost in the forest and we’re trying to get out.”
“Oh.”
Then again, worse this time.
Natsume broke away from Shibata’s side and cried out. He fell on his bottom and then crawled back from him.
“How did you get me here? What do you want from me?”
“I’d like my leg back,” Shibata joked. If it wasn’t broken, we’d have been out of here by now.
Natsume appeared so shaken up, he couldn’t get back onto his feet. He curled in on himself.
Shibata assumed he should console him or something. “Hey, kid—”
“If I give you my leg, would you let me live?”
He felt his heart sink. “I’m not asking for...for your leg. Kid, you’re safe with me. Would you help me walk? I just want to get out of here.”
Natsume’s eyes were wider than they ever had been. “Is that all...?”
“That’s all. Just think of it as helping out a senior citizen.” Shibata scratched the back of his head thoughtfully. “While we walk, I can tell you some stuff, yeah?”
With Natsume’s smaller stature, the pair lumbered along awkwardly, the kid trying hard to help him even though he’d been scared stiff a few minutes before. Shibata started to pick up his pace and hold more of his own weight, although the pain clamored in protest up his leg, but seeing Natsume struggle and pant beside him only reminded him of their lessening time.
But he didn’t want to show this desperation to Natsume. Instead, he told the kid about how he had worried the kindest people in the world by the name of the Fujimuras and his overprotective group of friends both human and ayakashi. How he was training under a famous actor by the name of Shuuichi Natori, and became a big name among the yokai and exorcists, while advocating for more peaceful negotiations between the two parties.
“You’re also in college believe it or not, and juggling school and work is turning you into more of a pole than before. Touko-san always complains to us about how skinny you are…”
During the whole talk, Shibata could see from the corner of his eye the skeptical and slightly conflicted twist of Natsume’s young face.
“I was even coming over for some nights for fun and then I find out you’re missing!”
“I’m sorry,” Natsume said hurriedly and strangely sincerely. Odd that the kid was apologizing for something his adult self did.
“Well, everybody’s waiting for you. I can just imagine the party they’ll throw after finding you. After they yell your ears off about doing risky things again that is.”
“Waiting for me…” Natsume muttered under his breath.
Shibata noticed how he was another inch shorter and panic started to rise again. “All waiting for you,” he responded absentmindedly as his mind whirred. “Hey, Natsume, I need you to do something for me.”
“What is it?” he asked as the man bent down and placed his hands on his shoulders.
“Go straight ahead, run as fast as you can. I’ll stay here and wait for you.”
“But you’re hurt and--”
“Don’t worry about me. You’ll know what to do once you’re out of the forest, I know you will.”
Natsume seemed to think about this for a while. But when he shook his head, Shibata didn’t know whether he wanted to cry of frustration and distress or of how his friend was braver than he thought, even as a helpless child.
“I won’t do it, Shibata-san, we can get out together.”
“Listen to me, Natsume,” Shibata choked. I’m only holding you back.
“Shibata-san?” Natsume said quietly. “Why…? Why are you crying?”
Shibata abruptly rose to his feet and, grabbing Natsume’s hand, trudged forward harshly. It wasn’t until his broken leg caught on a root and sent him falling hard onto the ground did he stop and feel the way his leg was pounding in pain.
His harsh breaths blocked out Natsume’s worried calls of his name.
He sobbed, “I’m so sorry, Natsume…!”
The clear silence surrounded him. The presence beside him— as he clawed his hand into the dirt and curled them into fists, unable to look him in the face— was stiff.
“After everything you’ve done for me… I couldn’t do a thing for you!”
A cold rippling gale rushed by them and Shibata had to lift his head to see the trees bending and the leaves clustered densely as they swirled in a storm.
He reached out to Natsume, bent over him to protect him from the bruising buffeting and sharp twigs as they nicked at their skin.
Only when a sinking blow met with his side did it rip him away from Natsume. He hacked and choked, clutching at his side. The wind had ceased. Natsume was standing.
“Na—” A swell of hurt cut off his voice. He could make out a ripple in the air beyond Natsume, like when heat bent the air.
The kid raised his trembling arms to shield him.
“Don’t touch Shibata-san.” Natsume shook in fear. “I won’t let you hurt him.”
An unimpressive but unrelenting intonation answered. “What’s a runt like you gonna do? Huh, huh, huh?”
It was an unyielding selfishness and greed that permeated the air around them and Shibata could hardly breathe inside its suffocating severity. The power the spirit had was one that wasn’t any sort of strength, but the built up mass and resistance affected everything else around it.
Natsume clutched his hands into fists. “He told me I had friends. He told me I had a family. He told me people were waiting for me. A person who would lie like that to comfort me can’t be all bad! So, I won’t let you hurt him!”
The spirit laughed haughtily. “If you know they’re all lies, why don’t you despair? I can help you. I can chase it all away.”
“Because…” Tears streamed down his face and his lip quivered, but he held a steel in his eyes. “Because I have hope that they will be true!”
The spirit jerked back as if it’d been burned.
“If I can protect someone like Shibata-san,” Natsume’s voice grew deeper, his stature widened and stretched. The shadow of the scared and hurt child remained, but now a gentle smile and a purposeful flame brightened his face, and now in a deeper, more powerful voice, “I can face someone like you.”
The spirit screeched and lunged for the man. “You’re weak!”
Seals flew into the air and enveloped around the spirit. Natsume placed his hands together.
“Evil spirit who dwells unnaturally upon the earth, no longer shall you torment the remaining. I cleanse this place of you. BEGONE.”
There was a scream and a bright light which washed over the forest and bathed there. The fog they hadn’t perceived lifted and the sun brightened the darkened wood. Shibata couldn’t keep his eyes off of Natsume’s unworldly appearance, a glow wrapped around him. He felt the constriction on his lungs abate.
Once the light faded away, Natsume collapsed.
“Natsume!” Shibata crawled over to his side. He lifted him up onto his lap and Natsume’s eyes fluttered then closed, his body falling limp. Shibata’s heart stopped. “What… what am I supposed to do!? Natsume! Please don’t be dead! Somebody! Somebody help!”
Unbeknownst to Shibata, Natsume’s yokai friends found them and went to get the humans, and soon after, Tanuma arrived with Nyanko-sensei.
Once Shibata calmed enough for someone to speak to him, Tanuma told him a single hour hadn’t passed since they’d parted ways.
Taki was looking him over, her eyes trailing down to his bent leg and gasping. “Did you break your leg? And it looks swollen! We have to get you to the hospital.”
“No, I want to stay with Natsume. Waaah!” Something white and heavy jumped onto his chest, effectively pinning him to the ground.
“Don’t worry, brat,” the cat said down at him. “He won’t be awake for a while. You’ll be by his side as soon as you get a cast.”
He ended up in the hospital despite his continued complaints all the way there.
Natsume woke up two days later and Shibata was one of the first to go see him.
He was sitting up from his futon and his elegant posture and the way the light went through his silver hair made Shibata think he was back in the Edo era, visiting a prince in his chambers.
Natsume turned to look at him away from the sight out of the sliding doors leading to Tanuma’s backyard. Shibata didn’t miss the way his gaze lingered guiltily on his cast.
“See, I thought we were going to go fishing,” Shibata said as he lowered himself carefully down to the floor.
The smile that split Natsume’s face was the best.
“I guess only the thought of it is left,” Natsume said. “We can do puzzles and drink tea.”
“You know how bad it is that I’m not even sure if you’re kidding.”
“Well, what else can we do?” he said, slightly defensive. “I’m bedridden and you’re hardly mobile yourself.”
“I…” Shibata hesitated, “can think of a few things.”
Natsume raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”
“Like…” he slipped his hand into Natsume’s, “...like this.”
He snuck a peek at his face and could see Natsume’s lips parted in surprise. Shibata honestly didn’t know what came over him but he swiftly leaned over and kissed him.
When he pulled away, he pulled his hand away as well and the pair of them sat there, red in the face.
“There’s also that,” Natsume said in a breath.
“I also want to talk,” Shibata added honestly, “talking would be nice too.”
“Talking would be great.” Natsume’s lips stretched. “But how about,” he reached over and locked hands with him, “talking like this.”
“I can do that.”
Natsume laughed and Shibata cracked a grin. They leaned into each other and met foreheads, cherishing each other.
“You know, you owe Tanuma a bag of salt.”
“How do I get holy salt?”
“Apparently at the grocery store.”
They dissolved into a fit of giggling.
Natsume couldn’t seem to keep his eyes open, his long lashes closing on his eyes. “Can you stay awhile?” he asked sleepily.
“Maybe a couple more years.”
Natsume swatted at him weakly as an automatic response to his ridiculousness before slipping into sleep.
Shibata lowered him down into the blankets again before feeling a wave of exhaustion himself, the promise of a good talk and the fact that Natsume was back safe pushing away the high wired stress that’d been keeping him going the past few days wearing off.
He laid down next to Natsume’s futon and, making a mental note to buy salt and kiss Natsume again, fell asleep beside him.