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We were both young when I first saw you
I close my eyes and the flashback starts
I’m standing there on a balcony in summer air
See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns
See you make your way through the crowd and say hello
Sirius was sitting on the ledge behind a potted plant at one of his family’s parties. Thankfully, this was one of Andromeda’s and not his parents, so it at least had the potential to be moderately interesting.
“Do you see her? The one over there with red hair.” These parties were also better because he got to bring James, who made any situation infinitely more exciting.
“Yes, James, I don’t know how anyone couldn’t see her- ow! Was that necessary?” James had elbowed him in the ribs for the perceived jibe about the girl.
“Who’s that next to her? The one in the shabby suit. Oh my God, look at him. James! I don’t think you’re giving enough appreciation to this!” The boy next to Lily had to be the most attractive person on the face of the earth. He had messy brown hair, and the way his eyes crinkled as he laughed had Sirius jumping from his hiding place to go and introduce himself.
Sirius tried to straighten his suit as he walked as quickly as would be socially acceptable (his parents were still here, and he suddenly didn’t want them to force him to leave). On the ground floor, Sirius had to stand on his toes to try and locate the boy. After a couple of minutes, he spotted him near one of the doors to the garden.
As he neared the door, it occurred to Sirius that he had absolutely no plan, what if he’s straight? What if James was wrong and he’s dating Lily? What if- Sirius was so lost in thought that he tripped over his own feet and fell on the stranger.
“Oh! I’m- I’m so- Sirius Black, nice to meet you.” Jesus Christ, what the fuck just came out of my mouth? Sirius stuck his hand out and grinned.
“Um, hi, I’m Remus Lupin” He awkwardly put his hand out and shook Sirius’ hand. That’s a hot name .
So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet ‘cause we’re dead if they knew
So close your eyes, escape this town for a little while
That summer, Sirius spent almost all of his nights in Andromeda’s garden with Remus. It hadn’t taken much convincing for his parents to allow him to spend his holiday with her, they didn’t like having him home, so pawning him off worked in their favor.
“Remus, you’re beautiful, you know that?” Sirius rolled over and kissed him, using the cover of night to say the things he was too scared of in the daylight.
“Yes Sirius, you tell me every day.” Remus sounded exasperated, but Sirius knew it was only an act. Sirius only told him every day in hopes he would start to believe him.
“What are we going to do after next week? When will I see you?” This had been a topic they discussed a lot recently, school was starting soon, and Remus took his studies far too seriously “I can’t spend all of my time being distracted by you.” Sirius didn’t care about his grades in the slightest, it made his parents angry when he didn’t do well, so he purposely didn’t study. And personally, spending his evenings distracting Remus sounded like an excellent use of his time.
“You know, James and I still have an open space in our dorm…” Sirius had been trying to convince Remus to stay with them. He was determined that he could wear him down eventually, and every day he seemed to be getting closer.
“Fine. I’ll stay with you.” Sirius cheered but Remus cut him off “I’ll stay with you, but only if you introduce me to your parents.”
“No. Absolutely not.” Sirius hadn’t been able to fully explain to Remus why this was out of the question.
“Fine. Then I’ll stay with Lily and Marlene.”
“Moony, you know you can’t stay in a girls’ dorm.”
“So then I’ll find somewhere else.”
“Don’t be difficult-“
“You’re the one being difficult! You’ve met my parents, why can’t I meet yours?” Sirius sat up, looking down at Remus.
“Because they hate me.”
“No one hates you.”
“They do! Remus, I don’t think you understand what it’s like there! They aren’t like yours and James’ parents. I just don’t want them to hurt you.” He whispered the last part, turning away so Remus couldn’t see the look on his face.
The conversation died out after that, there was nothing more Sirius could say to convince him, and Remus wouldn’t be swayed on his demand.
As if called by some awful twist of fate, Sirius’ mother showed up the next day. Remus had gone outside to read when she arrived. Walburga came in like a late summer storm, a gust of wind that toppled the carefully constructed life Sirius had built over the summer.
“Gather your things. We’re leaving”. Walburga Black was not a woman to be trifled with, and Sirius was smart enough to know the battle would be lost before he even opened his mouth.
Sirius ran outside while his mother was speaking to Andromeda, finding Remus in an alcove hidden by rose bushes. He slid to a halt, gasping for air as he tried not to cry, “Remus, I love you, I’m so sorry.” And then he was gone, running back to the car before his mother could notice his absence.
Romeo save me, they’re trying to tell me how to feel
“Remus? Are you there?” Sirius had his ear pressed to the phone, hidden in a servants’ pantry near the kitchen.
“Sirius? Where did you go? You left me.” Remus’ voice broke after his question.
“I’m sorry, my mom came, I couldn’t stay. Hey, I’m sorry, I took Reg’s phone so I have to be quick. Will you please stay with me and James? Please… I need you.” Sirius’ voice turned pleading.
“Okay, just promise me you won’t-“ The line went dead.
-
I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town
It had been five days since the phone call, six since he had last seen Sirius, and Remus was over it.
Who just tells you they love you before disappearing?
Who the fuck does he think he is?
God, I miss him…
-
On move in day, Sirius was up before the sun, running to Andromeda’s to get his illegal motorbike, racing down the block to Remus' house, only stopping when he was close enough to walk, wheeling his bike along so he wouldn’t wake anyone. He located Remus’ house, finding his window and picking up pebbles to throw. It only took two minutes for the window to open, a very sleepy Remus Lupin peeking his head out.
“Hey” Sirius whispered, smiling up at Remus.
“Sirius Black, I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, telling me you love me and then disappearing. I shouldn’t even speak to you!” Remus whisper-yelled at him.
Sirius looked down, suddenly unsure of himself.
“I’m sorry… I couldn’t…- I just… I just thought… I just wanted to keep you safe… to keep me safe… I know it was selfish, I didn’t want her to hurt you to try and get to me… I couldn’t bear the thought of her using you like that… I’m sorry.“ Sirius fiddled with his hands, staring at his feet. “But I’m… I’m here now… Can that be enough? Will you give me another chance?” He looked up at Remus, tears rolling down his checks with a scared but hopeful look in his eyes.
God, why does he have to look so pitiful? How could I ever say no to him? Remus knew his fate had been set the second he had met Sirius, and nothing could truly change something that had been written in the stars.
“Don’t you ever leave me again.”
Sirius looked up, a smile on his face, and a twinkle in his eye, “Okay.”
—
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring and said
“Marry me, Juliet, you’ll never have to be alone
I love you and that’s all I really know
…
It’s a love story, baby, just say yes
It took three years for Sirius to finally get the courage to ask Remus to marry him. They were in the back garden again, sitting behind the rose bushes they had loved as teens. Sirius had just cooked them a dinner of white fish and rice, followed by a fresh chocolate cake. (Mrs. Potter had been trying to teach him how to cook for years, and it was just starting to pay off), Remus was telling him about some obscure book he had found at the thrift store, when Sirius suddenly got out on his chair and down on one knee,
“Remus John Lupin, will you make me the happiest man on earth and marry me?” Sirius pulled a ring box he had carried in his pocket since the summer they met, looking up at Remus with nothing but adoration in his eyes.
“Of course I will Padfoot.” Remus pulled Sirius up, kissing him with all the love in the world.