Chapter Text
Ever since the day Katsuki had come to talk to Izuku, they had been much more comfortable around each other. Not that they'd been uncomfortable before, at least not after Kamino, but now that they'd been able to actually verbalize the emotions of the past year it was a lot easier to just be. To be sitting next to each other in the common room and be together despite each one focusing on something else. To be in the wooded part of the UA grounds, hushedly discussing Izuku's quirk with their only worries being that someone else might show up. To be in each other's rooms, often not saying much but simply benefitting from knowing the other was there. Kacchan would likely rather die than admit that last one, but things like that now only served to make Izuku laugh, and sometimes brought out a few jokes at Katsuki's expense. It wasn't normally something he'd do, but it was just so much easier to relax around Kacchan now. Their renewed bond had only reinforced Midoriya's knowledge that Kacchan was strong enough to handle anything.
And that was why Izuku's response to a one-word text from Katsuki was one of borderline panic.
"Deku."-Sent at 2:42 a.m.
Katsuki was never up that late. Ever. He kept the sleeping schedule of a professional athlete and refused to deviate from it for any reason, claiming it was vital to staying in peak condition even when someone(usually Iida) was telling him that it was obviously going to worsen his overall state to go for a morning jog with a 100 degree fever. Something was wrong.
Izuku padded up to Katsuki's room as fast as he could without making noise, only to find the door locked. He rapped on it gently.
"Kacchan?"
A buzz from his phone. "Go away."
"Not until I know what's going on."
Another buzz. "Nothing. Go away. Please."
Please? Now he knew something was wrong.
"Kacchan, if you don't open the door I'll crush the knob and then explain to Aizawa-sensei that I was so scared about you that I lost control of my quirk." Sadly, the only think Izuku was sure Katsuki would be scared of more than seeming weak would be having that image spread to someone else. He felt awful for using this, but whatever was going on he wasn't about to let Katsuki deal with it alone. He gave a small sigh of relief when the lock finally clicked, but those feelings vanished the moment he saw Katsuki.
His room was dark, lit only by his bedside lamp on its lowest setting. His bedsheets were a tangled mess, and Izuku could see parts of them that had clearly been burned by explosions. Katsuki himself was huddled in the middle, shivering as if he'd been frozen. Oh. Oh no.
"Kacchan..."
"I'm sorry"
"What?"
Izuku closed the door and moved as close to Katsuki as he could turning to see his face, that he now saw was stained with tears.
"I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry."
"For what?"
"I-I missed, abd then you fell abd then I cudln't do anything and-" Katsuki's tear-laden voice was cut off by a shuddering sob, and Izuku instantly embraced the other boy.
"Kacchan, I wanna help you but I don't know what you're talking about. Did you have a dream?"
"Ibt..." Katsuki paused, inhaling deeply to try and clear his nose. "It was K-Kamino."
Oh. Oh.
"You and Four Eyes and Kirish-shima were launching at me and...and I missed his hand. Then you all fell and-...and-" The ash blond couldn't bring himself to keep going.
Izuku's own eyes had begun to water upon realizing what his friend had gone through, but he buried those feelings deep as he tightened his hug, Katsuki's head pressing harder into his shoulder.
"It's ok Kacchan. It's ok. Can you take a couple deep breaths for me?" His rival remained silent, but as his breathing began to even out it was clear he was listening.
"Ok Kacchan. Now I need you to look at me. Can you do that? It's alright if you can't right away."
With obvious reluctance, the older boy disentangled himself and stared at Izuku face to face. It pained the greenette to see the raw fear in his friend's eyes, but he made sure his tone stayed as comforting as he could make it.
"You didn't miss. I'm right here. I know it felt real, but it wasn't. You grabbed Kirishima's hand and then the four of us got out safely. Everything is ok." Izuku placed one hand on Katsuki's shoulder and used the other to grab one of his own hands, hoping the tactile sensation would help dispel the dream's sense of reality faster.
"I...I could've fucked it up so easy. I coulda fucked up my explosion or my speed or.." Katsuki's eyes widened, the fear seeming to grow "I coulda just ignored you. I coulda been so far up my ass that I'da just ignored you extras and just...died."
"And I could've decided not to try and rescue you at all." The frankness of the answer seemed to startle Katsuki out of his trance-like state of fear. Good, that was good, that was what Izuku needed. Now to press the advantage. "Either one of us could have done anything else, but we didn't. Iida and I launched, you grabbed Kirishima, and we're all safe. That's all that matters." Should he...? Yes. He wasn't sure if this was the best time to say it, but he needed Katsuki to see this as clear as could be. "You were so, so strong to be able to do that."
"What?" Now Katsuki was even more confused, clearly trying to process what the hell he'd just been told.
"I know you think you're weak right now. I've, well, I've had dreams like this too. But you need to listen to me, because you are not weak. You spent almost three days as a prisoner of the League and all you did was tell them off? Kacchan, that's amazing! That's the kind of thing we always thought heroes did as kids, and you did it before you even got a provisional license! Anyone else would've been to scared to do anything, but you didn't give them an inch. That's what heroes do Kacchan, and I've even heard a couple pros saying that they weren't sure they could've done what you did. You're strong Kacchan, stronger than anyone else I know."
"I..." The explosive boy clearly wanted to escape his mindset of fear, but he still hesitated to believe his once-again friend. "I just...really?"
Izuku gave a small smile. "Really. Kacchan is amazing. It's why I've always looked up to you."
The hug the two boys found themselves in was much less tense than the first. Katsuki still shivered from time to time, but it was clear that the worst of the dream, and with it the tears, had passed. Despite his shorter stature the green-haired boy's embrace felt protective, as if it would stop anything in the world from getting to him. Katsuki couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this safe, with the hug seeming to go on forever. For once, that was fine by him.
Finally, he broke free of the tangle of limbs. It'd been clear that Deku was gonna let him stay that way as long as he wanted, but if he stayed that way any longer he'd fall asleep, slump onto Deku and knock them both off the bed. He looked Deku in the eyes once more, miraculously free of the shame he'd felt beforehand. Somehow, for some reason, it was ok if Deku saw him like this. It was ok for him to be act weak if Deku was there. With Deku around, he was safe.
"Th-thank you."
"It's fine. This is just what friends do for each other."
Katsuki managed a smile. "Tch. If you say so."
Izuku shifted a little. "Do you...need me to stay?" His heart soared a little when, instead of instantly snapping back with a "no!", Bakugo took a moment to think about it. "Nah. I'm tired enough to get back to sleep."
"Ok." Izuku hesitated a bit, but after watching Katsuki be this honest with his emotions he knew he had to say something. "Telling me all of this wasn't easy, not to mention how hard this is to deal with in the first place. I'm proud of you Kacchan."
"...Wow. Thanks, I guess." Katsuki was grateful he was so tired, or else his mind would be having a fit trying to figure out how the hell he was supposed to process that.
Izuku walked out the door, but paused before he closed it all the way. "If the dreams come back tonight, or any night really, just text me. Ok?"
"Ok." Katsuki wasn't even surprised at his lack of hesitation in agreeing to this-it wasn't like Deku was gonna do anything to him from knowing this. Deku was too good for that shit-hell, he was too good for Katsuki if he was being honest. But as he fell back asleep, all Katsuki Bakugo felt was the warm, comforting, safe feeling of knowing that, even if he couldn't trust his own mind, someone almost as badass as he was would be right there to help him.