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“Suguru Geto has been spotted near Shibuya station.”
Gojou’s heart nearly stops at the sound of the principal’s words. This couldn’t be happening.
Today he woke up expecting to take his daily shower, feed little Megumi false tales, expel some curses, maybe grab some dango on the way home. He was supposed to carry out his normal routine; just as he’d done for the past four years.
Why? Why was he showing up now? That bastard had left. He had fled from the school, starting a rampage on humans, calling them monkeys and preaching sorcerer supremacy.
Most importantly, he had abandoned him
No no no
His best friend was back, his ex-best friend to be exact.
Yet, Gojou couldn’t help thinking, weren’t they more than that? All of a sudden, the memories came flooding back. Each one hitting him harder and harder in the heart until he found himself on his knees, clutching his chest.
_____
Getou and him eating ramen after a long day of training and expelling curses, laughing about anything and everything. Gojou had snorted a noodle through his nose and Geto was cackling loudly enough that they were earning the dirtiest looks known to man from the other customers.
The time Geto had gotten stabbed during a mission and Gojou was tending his wounds in the middle of a forest. The only sounds in the air were their laboured breathing and the occasional hiss of pain from Getou. Seeing Getou nearly die brought on a fear he had never felt before.
Their first kiss. Right outside the principal’s office, to Gojou's utter surprise, Geto had cornered him to confess his feelings. In that moment, he felt such immense happiness Gojou had replied by smashing his lips against Geto’s. The two were kissing with so much fervor they fell through the paper doors, earning a loud scolding from the upperclassmen who happened to conveniently walk by.
When he and Geto were assigned their hardest assignment. Delivering the Star Plasma Vessel was not an easy task, they had to face assassin after assassin to get her to safety. But bonded through trust and friendship they managed to pull through.
Until that fateful night where they met Toji Fushiguro. The fight had been brutal, both the boys had been pushed to their limit, barely making out alive. That night, Gojou had lain beside Geto, their fingers intertwined in each other’s hair.
“We’re the strongest.” Gojou had whispered, placing a delicate kiss on the Getou’s cheek, trying to reassure him from their loss.
Geto twisted his face so that Gojou’s lips met his own before he muttered back, “Always.”
Gojou smiled at his words, “I love you”
“I know you do”
“No, Im-” Gojou was trailing kisses down his neck, his voice slightly muffled. “ In love with you.”
“For the fact that you have ‘Six eyes’ you’re quite blind if you can’t see that I’ve been feeling the same way for ages now.”
“Shhhhhh, let me have my moment.” bringing up a finger to press against Geto’s lips as he moved further down his body.
_____
“Gojou? Did you hear what I said?” Yaga asked quietly.
Feeling a firm grip on his shoulder, Gojou snaps out of his trance. He quickly nods, “Yeah, don’t worry, I heard.” He squeezes his eyes shut, thankful for the sunglasses that shielded the tears that were threatening to fall.
A small black head pokes around the door. His spiky hair going in all different directions.
“Gojo-Sensei, did you hear the news?” Megumi asks.
“Yeah kid, I heard.” Reaching down to pat the boy’s head.
“Are you gonna beat him up?”
Gojou gulps, he knows his duties, what he’s expected to do. But could he really do it? After all they’ve been through? Below him he could feel the boy’s small hands grabbing at his shirt.
“You know it!” flashing Megumi a wink as he walks out the door.
When he had made it around the building, Gojou let out a long sigh and leaned heavily against the stone walls. He allowed himself another long beat of silence before he drew himself together and went to meet his former lover.
_____
Gojou spotted him first, a dark lonesome figure standing amidst the flowing crowd. For a moment, that was all they were; two boys standing in a train station.
If only it was that simple.
Geto turned his head, he could feel his friend’s eyes from miles away. Those hidden blue eyes bore into him and he struggled to suppress a familiar ache that began to crawl up his throat.
This was it.
Wasn’t it?
The two began walking towards each other, an invisible cord pulling them closer and closer until there was barely a foot between them.
Despite the rustle of the crowd, the silence was thick and filled with unspoken memories.
“Still kept your shitty bangs huh?” Gojou said
Getou rolls his eyes, a humorous chuckle escapes his lips. “Weren’t they always your favourite?” A finger comes up to flick the strand.
Gojou cringes, his eyes wide not expecting Geto to refer back to their past so soon.
“Whatever.” he shrugs, darting his eyes away.
“Are you still at that school?” Geto asks, stepping a little closer.
“Yeah of course, the one you ran away from right?”
Geto scowls, “You know I didn’t run away.”
“Well, then what did you do?” Gojou lifts up his arms in the air as he exclaims, “because all I remember is you disappearing like a coward.”
“I escaped. ”
“Escaped what?! That school was our home, what did we ever do to you that was so bad you had to leave.” Gojou was quickly losing his composure as he stared into his best friend’s eyes, trying desperately to find any hint of remorse.
“That damned school was blocking our potential, your potential” They were nose to nose now, eyes gunning eachother down.
He continued on, now stepping back and raising his arms wide. “Yaiga would always go on and ON about saving humans, but why should we care for the weak when they serve no purpose to us??”
“Why can’t you see that we are strongest, that we will always be.” Geto whispered, grabbing onto Gojou’s hair, pressing their foreheads together.
“We were the strongest” Gojou bit back, leaning harder against Geto, “And then you left.”
A pause. His words hung in the air, dripping with undiluted pain. Maybe, just maybe. He wanted Geto to feel the same agony he had felt all these empty years without him.
“Tell me Geto, was it worth it?” Gojou rasps,
But what he really wanted to ask was “ was it worth abandoning us? ”
Getou stares back with half-lidded eyes, his lips set in a thin frown. A few heavy beats of silence pass before he turns his head and grabs Gojou’s hand.
Fingers tightening around Gojou’s palms he simply says, “Come with me”
Gojou would be lying if he said he didn’t want to, more than anything else he wanted to return back to the life they had, to the nights they shared under the moon, and the memories stolen under the stars.
Maybe before he would have thought that it was impossible. Yet, the fact that Geto didn’t answer his question had planted a seed of hope. A dangerous, rapidly growing seed. So despite his better judgement, Gojou took his hand and ran.
_____
“Please don’t tell me you brought me here to kill me.” Gojou says, half-heartedly joking.
He found himself standing in a narrow alleyway a few blocks from the station. Looking around at the worn brick walls and faded graffiti, he didn’t understand why Geto had brought him here.
“I just wanted some privacy.” Geto replies, his forehead slightly creasing the way it does when he’s deep in thought.
“Why?”
“To do this”
“Wh-” but Gojou’s words were cut off as Geto abruptly brings their lips together.
God, Gojou knew this was wrong but the familiarity of Geto’s soft lips was sickening.
It was an addition, one that he had to curb years ago. But here and now, he’s gotten another taste of it again, and he couldn’t stop. It finally felt like things had returned back to normal.
Like this kiss had shattered the nightmare that was the past four years.
So Gojou wrapped his arms around Geto’s waist and pulled him closer, fearing that if he let go he would lose him,
forever.
Maybe Geto could change, maybe they could finally be together again, maybe this really was all a dream.
The memories of their past resurfaced with every brush of his tongue against his and Gojou couldn’t help the silent tears that had begun to trail down his cheeks. Geto pushed him against the wall, the rough bricks scratching his back, but Gojou didn’t care. He just wanted Geto, he just wanted him back.
Before he knew it, their hands were thrusted into each other’s hair, bodies moving in sync from all the years of practice. Geto’s hands roamed all over his back, his hips, his chest. And Gojou let him, welcomed him.
Geto’s lips left his mouth and began to travel along his neck.
“Join me” He said, voice slightly muffled between his skin.
“hmmm?” Gojou gasps, his mind muddled with pleasure and nostalgia.
“We can do it” licking a trail up back to Gojou’s ear, “take over the world.”
What?
With those words, Gojou’s thoughts began to clear and he pushed him off,
“What did you say?” he asked, looking at Geto’s swollen lips before coming up to meet his eyes.
“Together, you and me. Just like the old times” Geto’s eyes were glassy, almost drunk. “Isn’t that what you wanted?”
This time Gojou was the one who took a step closer, he grabbed the sides of Geto’s head, and looked, really looked into his eyes.
This time, without the delusion of memory, when their eyes met, Gojou saw that they were painfully empty.
no , Gojo's throat closes up, his breathing hitches as his heart sinks lower and lower with every beat.
As he searches Geto’s eyes for any hint of light, Geto closes the distance once again and brings their lips together. The touch is cold and foreign, barely an echo of what it once was.
Gripping Geto firmly on his shoulders, Gojou shoves him away before staggering backwards.
“Stop,” he pleads, “Don’t touch me.”
A shadow of emotion crossed Geto’s face, so fast Gojou thought it was the light playing tricks.
“But you and me, think about what we could achieve!?” shouted Geto
“There is no more we ” Gojou gulps, “You made sure of that.”
“Why can’t you understand Gojo, why can’t you see that this is all just natural selection? That this is what we’re meant to do!”
“No, no, no.” He sighs, “Geto, I don’t know where we went wrong but this can’t continue on! You’re killing innocent people and for what? Natural selection is bullshit!”
But that wasn’t what hurt the most.
“You left me and you didn’t say anything, how could you?!” He couldn’t stop the words from barrelling out. “For days afterwards, I searched for you thinking that you ran away because of me!”
His eyes were practically ablaze right now, his sunglasses had been discarded somewhere during their scuffle before.
Geto steps back, his anger igniting. “You wouldn't have understood, Gojou, do you know what it’s like to always be good but never good enough?!”
He continues to grit on. “Let me answer that for you. No you don’t. Ever since fucking birth, you have always been the best.” He scoffs, “you manage to do everything with your powers and yet now when I do something useful with mine, I get slandered?”
“How is harming humans useful?! You’re delusional!”
“Monkeys!” Geto was gripping his hair as he screamed, “That is all they are. Monkeys!”
Gojou had never seen Geto like this, his eyes were crazed nearly feral as he continued to spout off about how humans were undeserving of life.
For the first time in four years, Gojou finally saw the reality of the situation. Standing before him was a deranged man, a ghost of his best friend.
“And I loved you! But you couldn’t understand.”
And just like that, time seemed to slow for Gojou.
loved
ed
as in past tense
Gojou stumbled back, eyes wide. He could barely hear Geto’s next words over the shattering of his own heart. He looked down at his hands which were slightly shaking.
He doesn’t love me anymore , He choked out. The world seemed to be spinning around him, warping everything he had come to known.
After Geto’s disappearance, the only thing that kept him going all these years was his love for Geto, the sheer hope that they might return to what they once were. Even after hearing about all the atrocities he had committed, Gojou still clung desperately to the hope that their love would prevail, that it would bring Geto back to him.
But now, looking at the echo of his lover. He knew that it was over.
This man before him was a stranger, the enemy, so before his thundering heart could hold him back again. Gojou swung his fist into Geto. By the end of this, only one of them would be walking away.
______
Geto’s head knocked sideways, stunned from the sudden punch, it took him a second to recover before he returned with his own reign of attacks.
The two boys were sprawled on the floor, Gojou had Geto in a headlock between his legs, squeezing hard to cut off his air. Geto’s hands were embedded deep into Gojou’s thighs trying desperately to claw them off. Turning slightly, Geto elbowed his ex-friend’s torso, loosening Gojou’s hold.
Oddly enough, neither of them opted to use their abilities, Geto didn’t release any shikigamis and Gojou couldn’t bring himself to even touch his curse energy. Through an unspoken agreement they both knew that this fight was purely physical.
Geto had his fingers wrapped tightly around Gojou’s throat. Squeezing hard but hardly squeezing. He couldn’t kill him, not like this. So when Gojou dove at the opening, he let him.
Gojou straddled him, throwing punch after punch until they were both bleeding heavily. Rivers of crimson flowed from their wounds, dripping onto the floor, mixing in with their tears.
Nearly blinded by the blood, Geto's fingers searched desperately for a weapon. When they managed to close around a shard of broken glass, he didn’t hesitate before he swiped it at Gojou, nicking his cheek.
Reaching a hand up to touch the droplets on his face, Gojou’s vision turned red. He lunged at Geto, kneeing him so hard the boy dropped the glass shard. Picking it up, Gojou barely even registered what he was doing before he shoved the glass into Geto’s side.
Clutching his ribs, Geto staggered a bit before he fell against the wall, sliding down with a thump.
Oh god , Gojou snapped out of his haze
Was this it?
Gojou knew it had to end like this, a good part of him had wished that Geto would be the one walking away from the fight. But in a fit of hurt and anger, his inner instincts took over.
Kneeling down besides Geto he brushed aside the strands of hair that stuck to his face. “You can change this”
Geto’s eyes lift up to meet his, “You know I can’t”
Lips trembling Gojou tries one last time, “please” his voice breaking as he repeats, “please.”
But Gojou knew that Geto was right, this couldn’t change, the person he knew was gone and he wasn’t coming back.
Whatever pieces that were left of Gojou’s heart had now crumbled to dust as he leaned into him.
“Geto,” he whispered, placing a gentle hand onto his cheek. Gojou couldn’t stop the hot tears from flowing down his cheeks. He rests his head into the crook of his best friend’s neck, he didn't move, he didn’t even breathe, he just wanted this moment to last.
Geto felt his throat tighten. Reaching up to smooth a hand down Gojou’s back, he could feel the slight sobs that shook through his body. Geto shakes his head, blinking back tears, his next words come out in a pained whisper,
“Maybe, in another life we could’ve been lovers, but not in this one, not in this world.”
Gojou finally looks up, his bright blue eyes bloodshot and shining. “Maybe.”
Gojou leans in to give him one final kiss, sealing their lips as he drives the shard into Geto’s heart. Simultaneously ripping apart his own.