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Chapter Text

Day 0

One second. That’s all it takes… Wei Wuxian has never been so grateful for his speed as now; because it only takes him an instant to realize Wen Ning’s movements and to put himself between his fierce general and Jin Zixuan. The pain hits instantaneously.

Wei Wuxian looks down and sees how he has half Wen Ning’s arm inside his chest, he used to say after the fight with Jiang Cheng, that he could have half intestines hanging, put them back inside and keep fighting (since that was kind of what happened anyway), but apparently, that does not apply to chest wounds. ‘Wen Qing is going to be so mad ’ a tiny part of him thinks, the rest of him is still in shock, the kind of shock one gets when they know they are about to die.

His unstable rage towards Jin Zixun and the rest of the mob who ambushed him vanishes, and with it, Wen Ning regains his consciousness and looks horrified at what he has done.

“M-master…” if he could, he would be even paler than he is, nevertheless, his pain is evident. Wei Wuxian coughs a bunch of blood as the corpse removes his arm.

“Silly Wen Ning… what are you doing… you can’t kill peacock… Shijie would be sad” he manages to say before falling to his knees, his ghost general catches him midway and cradles him.

Jin Zixuan looks stricken, also in shock as his mind tries to make sense of what exactly is happening before him.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I-I-I di-didn’t wa-want to!” even for a fierce corpse, his voice is so full of pain, regret, and raw despair that even both Jin cousins can’t help to wince “Master! Master Wei don’t go! A-Yuan needs you! Sister needs you! We all need you!” despite his pleas, Wei Ying can’t really hear him, he kind of knows what his friend is saying anyway, even so, he doesn’t have much energy to care about it, he is just grateful that he could protect his Shijie’s happiness from himself.

“Wen Ning…” he heaves as he coughs more blood “Not… your fault…” the world turns dark around him, but he refuses to leave just yet, he needs to tell him “Run… don’t let them kill… save them… Wen Ning…” there’s a lot he would like to say to him, please tell Jiang Cheng sorry, please apologize to Shijie for ruining her and Jin Rulan’s day, please tell A-Yuan to stop munching on unknown things, please tell Wen Qing to not be angry, please tell uncle to keep brewing wine… but he feels he has not much time left, so he hurries to tell his general his last command “Protect them…Wen Ning… save and protect your… our family” he figures he can get away with such sentimentalisms this time

“MASTER!!!!!!” the ghost general roars with grief

“Tell Shijie… Jiang Cheng… sorry… broke promise… I’m sorry” his voice is but a whisper, but Jin Zixuan is able to hear him just barely since he also falls to his knees “Run… Wen Ning” he coughs a bunch of blood once more. Before the darkness envelops him, he turns to the box in the ground, his nephew’s present, he tries so hard to move his hand to it, but he doesn’t have the strength anymore “Jin Ling…” his eyes closes one last time

‘Sorry Lan Zhan… I won’t be able to treat you lunch again’ Wei Wuxian thinks for the last time before he dies.

The Yiling Patriarch is dead

Day 1

The unbelievable news of the Yiling Patriarch’s death moves all around the cultivational world with scary speed, the only thing more unbelievable about it, are the circumstances surrounding his death. Rumors spread like fire. 

“Apparently he died protecting young master Jin from his own ghost general”

“That doesn’t make sense! Why would he protect him? Didn’t he give the order to kill him to the ghost general?”

“Maybe he regretted it?”

“Maybe he lost control!”

“Who cares?! The Patriarch is dead!”

“Good riddance!”

In the nearby forests, the fierce corpse trembles with grief and rage, for a moment he would love to kill all those who are bad-mouthing about his master, but he can’t do that, because he promised Master he would keep his family safe, and he promised Wen Qing he wouldn’t get into trouble. If he could sigh or cry, he would, but since he is dead, he can’t, so he can only look down and return to Burial Mounds in silence.

~~~~~~

Right after Wei Wuxian’s death, Jin Zixuan glared at Wen Ning before screaming at him.

“What the fuck are you still here for?!” the fierce corpse looks at him confused, his face is full of despair and pain “Didn’t your master told you to run?! Get away from here!”

Wen Ning regains his composure, but before Jin Zixuan can stop him, he takes his master’s body and flees. Jin Zixuan curses, he wanted Wei Wuxian’s remains so that Jiang Yanli could mourn him properly… no matter, he would go to the Burial Mounds later. The scene repeats over and over in his head, torturing him; ‘ Yanli is going to be devastated’ he thinks with grief and a bit of shock, then he looks at the box Wei Ying was looking at moments before his death, he mentioned his son so maybe it was something for him? He moves to get it.

“What are you doing cousin Jin Zixuan?! Don’t touch it! It could be dangerous!” Jin Zixun interrupts him and he snaps.

“SHUT UP!!” Jin Zixun pales, he has never seen his cousin this angry “DON’T YOU KNOW WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! THAT WAS MY WIFE’S YOUNGER BROTHER! MY GUEST!! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING AMBUSHING HIM HERE?!” the young master is furious, the rest of the mob that’s still alive takes a step backward

“Bu-but he was the Yiling Patriarch! He cursed me!” Jin Zixun tries to defend himself.

“So?! Has the curse lifted?!” He opens his tunic, but the one hundred holes remain on his skin “YOU ABSOLUTE IDIOT!”

“B-but cousin! He… had to… who else… he must have done something! So it wouldn’t vanish even after death! Cousin Yao said that he-!”

“SHUT UP!” Jin Zixuan trembles but forces himself to remain calm, he moves to retrieve the box, inside, there’s a small clarity bell, it looks crafted and has quite a few cracks from the incident, his face darkens, this was Wei Wuxian’s present for his son.

Jin Zixuan decides to take the matter into his own hands and with several biding ropes, he takes his cousin and the rest of the mob back to Lanling, with a broken present and a heavy heart.

~~~

His heart ends up breaking too, the moment he has to take Jiang Cheng and Yanli aside to tell them what happened. Jin Zixuan gave them the little present Wei Wuxian intended to give to Jin Ling and gives them his final message.

“He said that he was sorry for breaking his promise, sorry”

With a last heartbreaking scream, Jiang Yanli faints from the grief

Day 2

 Jiang Cheng, Jin Zixuan, and Lan Wangji go to Burial Mounds, two of them with broken hearts, to search for Wei Wuxian’s body. They find the Wens mourning him inside the Demon-Slaughtering Cave, with red eyes, Wen Qing agrees to talk to them.

“You need to hide” Jiang Cheng says through his teeth, he hates the clan for taking his family away, he detests them with every part of his being… but he will respect his older brother’s desire of protecting them, even if it kills him “Without him, the sects will come to destroy and take what they can, that means you too” Wen Qing nods

“I understand” she looks down, her voice trembling, as she is trying her best to be strong and not to break “I assume you have come for his body and his things” Jiang Cheng nods, one of the other Wen gives her a basket full of Wei Ying’s belongings “His sword has sealed itself, and the Stygian Tiger Seal is separated” she puts in two pouches, each one containing a part “He was looking how to destroy the damn thing, it takes a bunch of energy and it seems to be a complicated method, see if you can do it… don’t let it fall into the wrong hands” she warns them “There’s also his notes, and inventions, he would rather you have them than…” she sighs, looking on the verge of tears again “I know what everyone says about him… but he saved us, he gave us a home… he is… was a good man” she has to take a moment to compose herself, in which she dries the unshed tears “I have a request” she whispers, Jiang Cheng arches an eyebrow “Take A-Yuan with you… we don’t know where or how we are going to live from now on, his protections here won’t last for long and the resentment energy will be back full force so we can’t stay… A-Yuan doesn’t deserve this, he doesn't deserve a life running and hiding... its not... that's not what he wanted” she looks back and the men follow her gaze, next to the stone where Wen Ning put the corpse of Wei Ying, a toddler cries and whimpers, calling Xian-gege to please come back. The scene is beyond disheartening.

“I’ll take him” Lan Wangji says unexpectedly, surprising the other two, yet Wen Qing nods, holding her tears again. It is the only thing he says during the whole travel to Yunmeng as they take the crying child, Wei Ying’s body, and his belongings back to his family.

~~~~~

The funeral ends up being in Lotus Pier, during the whole process, neither Jiang Yanli nor Jiang Cheng nor Lan Wangji moves from the resting casket.

‘Please Heavens… let him find happiness in a good life’

After the funeral services, and taking the child to Cloud Recesses, Lan Wangji enters seclusion, from then on, any GusuLan Sect disciple that walks close to the place will hear every night, without a miss, a solitary guqin playing Inquiry.

Day 1095

Exactly three years after the Yiling Patriarch's death, his soul returns to the world.

That same day, and unbeknownst to everyone, at the exact same time, Jiang Yanli gives birth to her second child: Jin Ying

Chapter Text

Year 2

In the end, after much negotiation, Wei Wuxian’s belongings are up split into three: All his notes of demonic cultivation and one half of the Stygian Tiger Seal go to Cloud Recesses (along with A-Yuan), under the care of Huanguang-Jun; Chenqin and the other half of the Stygian Tiger Seal go to Lotus Pier, under the careful watch of Leader Sect Jiang; and finally, Suibian stayed at the hands of Jiang Yanli, who makes sure to clean the sword even if it was sealed, at least once a week… which is how they realize

The Second Young Master Jin was born the same day Wei Wuxian died, everybody thought it was suspicious at best and bad omen at worst; some people had their own theories about it, but nobody dared to say them out loud. Jiang Yanli was one of those.

She grew up with Wei Ying, she knew him, and when she looked at her baby, she had this… feeling, it was strange, like a pull, like something she knew but her mind wasn’t acknowledging it; so for two years, she pushed all the despair, hurtful thoughts, and the growing but aching hope, in the back of her mind. To some degree, she knew Jiang Cheng was suffering all the same.

But as it seemed, for all their effort at attempting to ignore their hearts and instincts screaming what they saw, one can just not block the reality forever.

Every week, Jiang Yanli took Suibian from its place on the altar and she made sure to clean it as thoroughly as she could, considering that it was sealed; every now and then Jin Ling would go help his mother, proudly puffing his chest as much as a five-year-old could, and she would chuckle and call him her hero, while his little brother slept through his nap.

This time, Jin Ling thought that it would be a good idea to clean it by himself with the aid of his little sibling, so they could give Mother a surprise.

“A-Ling sure?” the toddler asks seeing how big (and a bit scary actually) the sword really is

“Of course, A-Ying! It’s really safe! Even Dad can’t unsheathe it!” the kid kneels onto the altar and stretches to reach the sword “Look, I’ll take it from the scabbard” Jin Ling proudly flexes his recent acquired sword knowledge to his star-eyed brother “I lower it to you and you take it from the hilt, that’s this part” he shows him. A-Ying, who loves to please his older brother, nods excitedly.

Jin Ling carefully takes the sword from its resting place, ‘Was it always this heavy? ’ he wonders as he makes the effort to move it slowly to his younger brother to reach, the toddler puts his little, chubby hands around the hilt. At that exact moment, Jin Ling loses his balance and falls, just as he does though, his instincts grab the scabbard to support himself, at the other end, the unexpected movement makes Jin Ying fall backward as well, taking the hilt with him.

Both kids fall into their baby bottoms. The sound created by the whole incident of course makes the maids and disciples near to come running to their aid, yet all of them just freeze upon seeing the scene. Not a full minute later, both parents enter with alarm at the word of their children being in the direction of that loud, crashing sound.

“A-Ling! A-Ying!”

“Are you alright?!”

Yet, they too, stop completely. Inside the room the altar is down from the force of young master Ling at the moment of his fall, he’s in the same position in which he fell and with his eyes drawn at the same place as everyone else; next to him, lays Suibian’ scabbard… just the scabbard. In front of him, Jin Ying holds Suibian by the hilt, the blade finally free supporting itself on the floor.

Everyone in the room stares in utter shock, some of them even in horror, how the little second master of the Langling Jin Sect looks at the unsheathed sword almost as if hypnotized, it's only one second later that it dwells on Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli that their two-year-old son has a potentially dangerous weapon on his chubby, innocent hands.

"A-Ying! Don't touch that!" Jin Zixuan is incapable of keeping his voice from raising, startling the child that drops the unsheathed sword to the floor. As if an apparition has been broken, the toddler starts crying, Yanli hurries to take him carefully into her arms, both to comfort him and to shield him from prying eyes. Jin Ling only manages to take his sight away from the sword to glance worriedly at his younger brother.

Jiang Cheng runs into the hall hearing the commotion and his younger nephew's wails

"What happened?!" he asks with his adrenaline to the top

"... A-Ying just unsheathed Suibian” his sister's voice is merely a broken whisper, but it’s enough to darkly reassure everyone that this wasn’t just a hallucination

Sect Leader Jiang freezes in shock.

~~~~~~~~~

After Jiang Yanli, checks that both of her kids are unharmed, she hurries to take them elsewhere. Meanwhile, both Jiang Cheng and Jin Zixuan make sure that nobody is going to talk about what happened… in fact, they make sure that nothing ever happened.

The servants and the disciples nod terrified.

~~~~~~~~~

Later that night though, Jin Ying has nightmares.

In his dreams, he sees a man, a powerful one, playing a dizi chenqin, as he raises a furious army of the death. The images are terrible and they feel so real, the kid barely escapes them when he wakes up with a scream, one that has his older brother next to him within an instant and both of his parents in his room within the next one

He wails, sobs, and cries as he tells the horrible, horrible vision he just saw, Jin Ling is scared for his baby brother, and both Jian Yanli and Jin Zixuan look at each other highly concerned, not even taking into consideration the issue of his child being the possible reincarnation of the YiLing Patriarch, they wonder… how a two-year-old child is supposed to live with the nightmares of his past life?!

Year 3

The answer to that question turns out to be… not mentioning such dreams in the morning, when A-Ying plays with his brother and his parents, as normal as a kid his age can. The nightmares continue throughout the whole year; Jiang Yanli keeps cleaning Suibian, but now she doesn’t let the kids get near

“We don’t know when it could unsheathe again so it’s dangerous, you two can help me when you are older” is what she says, even if she knows that’s a lie. Even after that incident, after Jiang Cheng put the blade back into its scabbard and back in the altar (without daring to touch it again), the next time Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli tried, the sword went back to be sealed.

Neither of them talked about it. Until the next thing happens.

For Jin Ling’s birthday, his uncle, Jin Guangyao gives him a spiritual dog (which Jin Ling promptly calls Little Fairy). Everything is fine… until he goes to show the puppy to his parents and his brother.

The three of them are in the garden, which is the perfect opportunity, so he lets go of Little Fairy’s leash; the puppy barks happily as she runs to the ones that smell like her master. The moment Jin Ying hears the first bark, his body goes completely rigid, his face goes deadly pale, and he starts shaking uncontrollably, his eyes are out of focus until he turns carefully and sees the dog running straight to him. The screech of pure terror that comes out of his mouth at the sight stays in both of his parents’ nightmares for years.

Jiang Yanli hurries to take him in her arms, as the toddler screams and cries like when he awakes from a horrible nightmare almost every night. Jin Ling quickly takes Little Fairy’s leash and looks at his baby brother’s reaction with shock and concern. A-Ying has always been wary of dogs, he wouldn’t come close to one, but he never screamed in such horror at the sight of one… until now, that is.

“What’s wrong A-Ying?” Jin Zixuan asks his son, worry in every pore of his face

“You had a nightmare about dogs?” Yanli asks because it’s obvious what this is, she has seen it years before, whenever his younger brother would stumble upon one. The child on her arms barely manages to nod as he continues to tremble quite violently, she looks at her husband, and he understands, even if he wasn’t completely aware of Wei Wuxian’s fear of dogs, just the expression he sees on his wife’s face is enough. He sighs.

“A-Ling, follow me, and bring the puppy with you” he says before going to his half-brother to kindly return the present, at least until they find a better solution

~~~~~~~~~~

That night, Jin Ling is feeling pretty down about it, he’s still in shock about his baby brother’s violent reaction, but at the same time, he can’t really stop himself from feeling something akin to resentment. As upset as he is, he doesn’t even tell good night to A-Ying, who just cries himself to sleep.

In the middle of the night, a series of quiet sobs and whimpers awakes him, he turns to his brother’s bed, where he can see the entire frame shake with how hard the kid is trembling. His anger and resentment fly away, he crosses to the neighboring bed and carefully embraces his baby brother.

“What’s wrong A-Ying? What did you dream?” because it’s obvious that this is the making of a nightmare

“D-d-d-dogs!” the toddler manages “Big ones! B-b-biting me! C-c-chewing me! I could not run!” the child cries inconsolably.

Jin Ling looks at him horrified, how a baby so cheerful and cute as A-Ying, could have such horrible dreams?! Then it dwells on him ‘Maybe seeing Little Fairy make him dreamt this?’, he feels guilty knowing that he thought badly about his sibling despite his terrors being… like this.

“It’s okay A-Ying, I’m here, your big brother is here, and I’ll send away any dog that wants to bite you” he hugs the toddler and comforts him, feeling the worry about his sibling rise once again

“I’m sorry A-Ling!” the kid cries again “I-I-I promise I be brave! A-Ying be brave! So A-Ling can have uncle’s present again! So… so… please don’t hate me!” the sobs grow a bit louder, and Jin Ling internally panics, but he is the older one, he has to protect his baby brother

“It’s okay A-Ying, I don’t hate you! I could never hate you! A-Ling loves A-Ying” he keeps repeating the last line to the kid in his arms, as a protective charm, until he is calm and relaxed again.

On the other side of their door, Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan smile tiredly at each other, feeling proud of their firstborn, maybe they can make some arrangements so he can keep the puppy, he deserves it after all, just as long as it’s away from the toddler. In the morning though, the parents have to make plans so they can protect their son. So they can protect A-Ying

Chapter Text

Year 4

On a peaceful day like any other, Jin Guangyao walks through the halls of Koi Tower, thinking how exactly is he supposed to enact his father’s latest plan. ‘Sect Lider Nie is getting too much power, the last conference he stood with Lan Wangji against us and prevented us from reclaiming Wei Wuxian’s scripts, I bet those Lan’s have the seal as well, do you know what we could with that power? The power that beat the Wens?! I don’t think I have to tell you what you have to do, if you even want the option to be the next sect leader that is…’

Those were Jin Guangshan’s words a few months ago, since then, Guangyao has been planning on how to remove Sect Leader Nie (his sworn brother) from the equation… and how to get both the seal and the scripts from Zewu-Jun. He sighs tiredly. ‘I was the one who killed Wen Ruohan, though’ he thinks bitterly.

Despite all his best efforts, no one of the Jin Sect acknowledges him yet, which is tiresome and frustrating, and after what happened with Jin Zixun the things only got worst. The man had blamed him for everything, for the idea that Wei Wuxian had cursed him, to the plan of the ambush, without evidence though, his words were mere leaves that the wind flew away; the Jin Sect disowned Zixun for his cowardly act (with the full support and pressure from Madame Jin at the sight of Jiang Yanli’s grief) and let him rot with his curse. Which took his life in less than a year. Honestly? Good riddance.

Even without any evidence to blame him, and with the knowledge that he had been the one to warn Jin Zixuan of his cousin’s acts, Guangyao’s behaviors and reasons arouse suspicion all over Lanling, forcing him to lay down and to delay his plans for a few years, else he wanted to be kicked out the sect and thrown to roll down the stairs of Koi Tower again. Even the careful plan with the demonic cultivator Xue Yang had gone south the moment Xiao Xingchen arrested him for killing the Chang Clan. Even if his father wanted to protect him to keep searching the Stygian Tiger Seal and experiment, there was nothing they could do against the other Sects; Jin Guangyao wanted to keep him of course, as per Father’s wishes and to secure more his place… but his brother wasn’t having it.

“I won’t allow a demonic murderer near my sons, he has to pay for his crimes and everyone agrees to it! To protect him will reflect poorly on us and I refuse to keep him in the same place as my family, even if he is in the dungeons!” those were Jin Zixuan's words, and, in front of Madame Jin, Jin Guangshan had to relent. Xue Yang’s execution was a few days after that. That case alone delayed all of Jin Guangyao’s plans.

Despite all of his pressures, his ‘dear father’ kept making him do the dirty work, and after the incident two years ago, Jin Guangshan’s plans became… more ambitious and dangerous.

“It is said that my ‘precious’ grandson unsheathed Wei Wuxian’s sealed sword, considering that, it's most than likely that he is the reincarnation of the YiLing Patriarch himself… what a wonderful opportunity to be able to raise such a pawn” he said in one of his drunk nights in a brothel as he surrounded himself with paid women, Jin Guangyao’s face darkens though it doesn’t strike as a surprise that his ‘father’ is willing to use a child, his grandchild to gain the type of power Wen Ruohan had before his fall

“And if the kid’s not willing?” he asked

“Then we must get rid of him, we can’t risk that kind of power to be against us” he simply said as he drank once more. Jin Guangyao often wonders if this father of his hears what comes from his mouth.

Remembering all these conversations, he starts to make plans on the top of his head, barely minding to salute other sect members that cross his path.

“Tch, Meng Yao again” he hears them say to his back.

“How long is that bastard going to ruin Lanling Jin’s reputation? Damn son of a prostitute, I hope they kick him soon or else- agh!”

Jin Guangyao was in the middle of toning down their voices, it wasn’t the first and certainly not the last time he heard things like those, yet suddenly those elder disciples’ voices stop at all, in exchange, a tiny yet loud voice takes their place.

“Shut up! You cannot bully Uncle Yao!” Jin Guangyao turns to see what’s going on and he can see his little nephew Jin Ying throwing pebbles to the other members of the sect “Uncle Yao is really smart and cool! He is more smart than you! He must stay here because he is really cool and this sect needs him!” hearing the tiny gremlin defend him gives him a warm feeling in his chest, similar to when Xichen and MingJue defended him as well… before he… he shakes his head and walks to the kid.

“A-Ying! Don’t throw pebbles, you could hurt someone” he gently scolds him. The boy just puffs his chest, as his older brother does (looking very much like his father), and puts himself between him and the elders.

“They are bullies! They said mean things about Uncle Yao and his mother! I don’t allow it!” the kid adorably scowls and yells at them, the others are at loss of what to do, regardless of what they think or their status, this is the Second Young Master, the smaller terror of Koi Tower, known by everyone for his pranks “If someone must be kicked out it should be you two!” the kid strongly declares, and even the genius Jin GuangYao doesn’t know what to say about this situation “Do not bully uncle Yao or I’ll tell Father!”

Both elder disciples pale at the kid’s words and hurry to apologize and then flee from the place, the older man sighs

“A-Ying… you really shouldn’t talk to others like that…” the kid looks outraged at his words

“But they were being mean! And you are family! And family protects each other! Daddy said so! And, and you are really smart! And and-“ the kid’s rant gets interrupted by the chuckle of his uncle

“Okay, okay A-Ying, I get it” he laughs quietly a bit more, because honestly, the expression of justice the tiny Jin has is too adorable, even for him “Thank you for defending me”

For the first time in years, he shows a real smile

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s a few months after that, Jin Guangyao is stressed. His father keeps pressuring him to get rid of his sworn brother Chifeng-Zun and to get the seal and scripts from Zewu-Jun (Guangyao truly looked for them in all Cloud Recesses, yet didn’t find a thing, so he starts suspecting that both things are not actually under the Sect’s protection, but rather Lan Wangji’s protection; even for a genius like Meng Yao, that was a dangerous territory).

Ever since Meng Yao’s mother died, he has been looking for his place, for a family, and for the power to silence everyone who wronged him and his dear mom; he never stopped for anyone or anything, seeking for his father’s approval as his mother wanted. Yet… ‘You are family! And family protects each other!’, ever since then, he can’t seem to take his mind off his nephew’s words, it was… it was as if Jin Ying had seen right through him, right into his deepest wishes. Of course, that couldn’t be it, the boy was only four, but just for a moment… Jin Guangyao likes to imagine the kid really meant it and it wasn't mere childish talk.

He sighs tiredly. He is just returning from wrapping up the night-hunt on Phoenix Mountain, the last few days organizing the whole deal and making sure it went smoothly were such a headache, he has the feeling Madame Jin puts him in charge of the event just to spite him, ‘Well, at least this time went smoothly’ he thinks as he walks to the kitchen to look for something to eat. On his way there, he catches his older nephew with a bowl in his hands, looking everywhere and trying to ‘hide’ behind a pillar.

“A-Ling” he calls softly, the seven-year-old kid startles and almost drops the bow, he smiles softly “What are you doing?” Jin Ling looks a bit guilty and blushes before straightening himself

“I’m taking food to A-Ying” he whispers like a secret “Please don’t tell anyone shushu”

“But why are you bringing him food at this time? He didn’t eat dinner?” the kid shakes his head and whispers something like ‘he wasn’t there’, which is weird cause his younger nephew never misses dinner time unless he is sick, but he saw both children at the hunting ceremony, so that can’t be it “A-Ling, do you know why A-Ying wasn’t at dinner tonight?” he asks, Jin Ling looks down

“He's grounded” he whispers in response

“I see… what did he do this time? Did he make another prank?” Guangyao’s lip turns slightly upwards, resisting a little chuckle, he often hears about the kid’s games around the tower, they are mostly harmless albeit troublesome, only one or two were actually dangerous, and both children got scolded for it. Jin Ling makes a pause, he looks a bit troubled.

“He yelled at grandfather and grandmother in front of everyone yesterday at the hunt” well that’s unusual, normally A-Ying gets along great with Madame Jin, she adores the little child

“Why? What happened?” Guangyao asks quite confused. Jin Ling looks even more troubled if that's even possible

“Grandma said mean things and then Grandfather said other mean things that we got to hear, and A-Ying yelled at them”

“Must have been serious” he wonders out loud, he knows his nephew will tell him with enough probing. The kid looks at him a bit upset

“She told grandfather that you shouldn’t be here, ‘cause you were useless, then he answered ‘of course he is, he is the son of a…” Jin Ling shakes his head “Dad told us to never repeat those words cause they were harmful to you” the kid looks down again. Jin GuangYao feels a dull rage fill him ‘After all I’ve done and he still…’, he clenches his teeth before forcing himself to relax

“When… when did this happen?” he makes his best effort not to seethe, but Jin Ling doesn’t notice it anyway, he looks like he needed to talk about it.

“Yesterday, when uncle was surveilling the hunting grounds… there were some other cultivators nearby, A-Ying got really mad and he yelled at them… he said they were bullies and that uncle Yao was way better than grandfather and… he told grandma that he wouldn’t love her anymore if she kept bullying uncle Yao cause uncle Yao is amazing and they are not” Jin Ling smirks a little, secretly proud of his younger brother “Both of them were furious and told A-Ying to take his words back and A-Ying refused, then grandma told him that he wouldn’t have dinner if he didn’t apologize… A-Ying told her that he would apologize when grandma apologized to uncle” Jin Ling chuckles a little remembering the expression of their grandparents, but then remembers his poor brother must be hungry and sighs “So he can’t have dinner till he says sorry… but he won’t say sorry till they say sorry” Jin Guangyao is frozen in place, that’s just- “Dad said he would speak to grandma so she lifts A-Ying’s punishment… mom and dad were really mad too and talked to our grandparents, mom also fought with grandma, which never happens, and she went back to Yunmeng for a few days to calm down… she told me to go with her but I didn’t want to leave A-Ying alone” Jin Guangyao really doesn’t know what to say now, his entire life of plans and strategies didn’t prepare him for this! Deep, sealed emotions from the past arise and he feels overwhelmed “A-Ying was right though” Jin Ling sends him a smile “Uncle Yao is really amazing”

‘Ah… I don’t… I really don’t think I deserve that smile’ he thinks, yet he keeps his thoughts to himself; he pats Jin Ling’s head affectionally.

“Let’s get your brother some food” he tells him softly.

In the brother’s room, Jin Guangyao hugs them both and thanks them. The kids hug him back and A-Ying proceeds to gush about how cool was the hunt and how awesome was that his uncle prepared it, and how the disciples from other sects looked incredible and he wants to be a cultivator soon and, and-

Guangyao smiles and laughs at his nephews, then tucks them in for the night. Bringing the bowl back to the kitchen he crosses paths with his half-brother, who just smiles at him and gives him a side hug, complimenting him for all his hard work. The repressed feelings grow.

That night in the solitude of his room, he smiles, and laughs and cries just a bit too, ‘cause… just what the hell has he been doing all this time?! Seeking the approval of a man that sees him barely as a pawn? What a joke!

‘Apologies mother… but I won’t follow him anymore’

~~~~~~~~~~

After that, Jin Guangshan kept whining and throwing fits about how a four-year-old brat humiliated him in front of the other sects, he kept pressuring Jin Guangyao, even to the point of bringing another illegitimate child to Koi Tower, Mo Xuanyu as a silent 'threat'.

The real snapping point though, was when, in one of his drunk tantrums, Jin Guangshan decided that Wei Wuxian wasn’t worth the effort as a pawn, and thus, he told Jin Guangyao to find the way to eliminate him as well.

A few months later, the Sect Leader Jin had a very strange incident in which he lost his life, nobody knew how, and nobody would know.

‘It’s not like anyone misses him, anyway’ Jin Guangyao thinks calmly as he looks both of his nephews draw on paper

“Uncle Yao! Uncle Yao! Look! It's us!” A-Ying runs to him with a drawing on his tiny hands, in it, there are doodles that kinda look like Jin Zixuan, Jiang Yanli, Jin Ling, Jin Ying, Jiang Cheng, Mo Xuanyu and him, all of them holding hands, all of them happy. He feels a warm feeling as he pats the kid’s head.

“This is wonderful A-Ying! Why don’t you show it to your parents? I’m sure they will love it” he smiles kindly, the kid practically shines with the praise and runs to look for his mom and dad. For a moment, Jin Guangyao wonders if this is what true happiness feels like

Chapter Text

Year 5

Jiang Cheng paces through his room feeling quite troubled. If his problem were related to Sect matters he probably wouldn’t give much thought, and he would just deal with it the way it came. But life never came easy enough for him it seemed, and so, the tiresome issue he is dealing with, has to be related to his late brother. No, he couldn’t think of A-Ying as Wei Wuxian anymore, it wasn’t fair for the kid.

He knows that, of course… and yet.

Sect Leader Jiang groans, the problem he is in, is because his younger nephew’s birthday is coming up soon, and he has no idea what to give him.

If this was about A-Ling it wouldn’t be an issue at all, kid's toys or cultivation tools for youngsters always made him happy; overall it wasn’t about Jin Ying’s likes and tastes, the kid was extremely happy with whatever thing he gave him… the problem were A-Ying’s flashbacks.

Ever since A-Ying touched Suibian and accidentally (and unconsciously) revealed himself as Wei Wuxian’s reincarnation all of them had been anxious. His reincarnated identity was not the only worrying thing, the most concerning part of the incident was that the sword appeared to unsealed Wei Ying’s memories that poured into his reincarnated self, worst of all was that it seemed that almost anything related to his past life would unleash a new wave of memories that, as Yanli told him, emerged in the form of nightmares and night terrors.

“He is remembering A-Cheng” his sister told him last time he visited with a sad, worried expression “Right now they are only dreams, but I’m afraid he is going to remember everything…” she sobs and her brother hugs her in comfort “He is so young! I don’t want him to suffer! And what if the others find out? If they try to hurt A-Ying-!”

“It’s okay A-Jie, we will protect him” Jiang Cheng swears on his life ‘This time, I’ll protect him’

Easier said than done though.

Jiang Cheng sighs. The first thing they would like to protect A-Ying from, would be his own memories, but without knowing the extent of Jin Ying’s soul damage, they could not even begin to try and guess what could actually provoke another ‘dream’ (flashback)

Without any better ideas, he goes to his table, takes paper and his brush, and starts to write a letter, who better to help with gifts ideas than the older brother of the birthday boy himself?

A few months after Jin Guangshan’s death, Jin Ying celebrates his 5^th birthday. Ever since his nightmares began, Yanli and Zixuan had agreed to spent his birthdays at Yunmeng Lotus Pier, having the feeling that their child’s soul will have some sort of calm and familiarity… and they were right. It seemed that the nightmares were less being there, so Jin Ling and Jin Ying spent quite a few months at the Jiang Sect’s quarters every now and there.

For this birthday though, they had to stay in Lanling. His father, Jin Zixuan, had just raised as the Sect Leader, and despite his mother and half-brothers’ approval and support, he still had a lot to do, especially considering how much of the messes his father, Jin Guangshan, did that he had to clean. Jin Zixuan really had barely time to breathe, there had been many nights he spent in his office, working on the Sect’s neglected affairs, it was really too much. He was so busy that a trip to Yunmeng, even a short one, was out of the question, however, he didn’t want to miss his son’s birthday; when presented with this dilemma, Jin Ying only smiled

“Then we celebrate at home!” he said with sparkling eyes, Jin Zixuan’s heart clutched at his cute son’s expression

“Are you sure A-Ying?” the child nods, even if he is a little disappointed for not being able to play in the river and run all through the forest near Lotus Pier, he much rather spent the day with his beloved parents, brother, and uncles “What a great child I have” Zixuan smiled fondly and patted his head “I promise I’ll take you to Lotus Pier as soon as I get a spare day” the child beamed

Normally, for Jin Ling’s birthday, the celebration was arranged by Madame Jin who was adamant to spoil her grandchild, so his birthdays were mostly a grand celebration, especially so after he started his sword training, being the future heir of the Lanling Jin Sect, it was no wonder that the date was also used as political meetings, inviting mostly other Sect’s leaders and their children; In his everyday life, Jin Ling didn’t spend time playing with other children in Koi Tower, because of his statute as the heir, most of the kids only stayed close to him because their parents told them so, not because they liked him, and he could tell the others didn’t like him. Because of that he was extremely happy to see his friends Lan Jingyi, Ouyang Zizhen and Lan Sizhui (not like he would ever admit it though); honestly, he didn’t even know how he got along with them so well, especially Jingyi and he fought a lot, yet somehow it worked. For Jin Ling’s last few birthdays, the Lan Sect’s youngest disciples had attended along with Sect Leader Zewu-Jun and Lan Qiren.

Those were the only days the Jin siblings weren’t stuck together.

During those days of celebration, taking advantage of his young age, Jiang Yanli spent days doting and holding her younger child, making sure he was safe and within reach. Even if her husband and brother reassured her that nobody would speak of what happened that day, she had heard the rumors, they were mild and not strong, but they existed. Yanli always heard what the rest talked about her brother, how they saw him as a threat and how glad they were when A-Xian died, she dreaded what could happen to her little, innocent baby if they were to learn that he was A-Xian’s reincarnation, the mere thought of it terrified her husband, her brother and herself.

Under that same thought, contrary of Jin Ling’s birthday’s parties, Jin Ying’s birthdays were different, smaller, quieter to the outside world, because the kid was still young and his family still dotted on him relentlessly, A-Ying never really saw the difference, even more, he was glad that his birthdays weren’t full of boring, screaming adults. He had his parents, his uncles, his brother, and his best friend Mianmian, the daughter of the head disciple of the Jin Sect, so what else could he want?

~~~~~~~~~~

“A bow?” Jin Ling asks his brother who is seated on a low tree branch, he looks confused at the girl next to him, Mianmian was a few months younger than Jin Ying, and since Luo Qingyang, the head disciple had presented her daughter to the young masters, Jin Ying and she had become best of friends, for extension, Jin Ling had taken upon himself to care for her as his younger sister as well. Right now, the girl looks as confused as him at A-Ying’s answer to his question of ‘what do you want for your birthday?’

“Yes!” the smaller kid smiles

“Your training starts in two years though” Jin Ling crosses his arms

“I know A-Ling, but…” he bites his lip, it’s not like he can explain with words the too often dreams he has, of a younger man with dark robes shooting arrow after arrow along a few people, one of them has white funeral robes, one of them has purple robes (like uncle Cheng) and one of them has white with red robes, even if in his dreams he can’t see their faces, he has the feeling that the young man was really happy then, that dream echoes and he feels once more an uncontrollable itch on his tiny hands.

“I think your parents would agree” Mianmian tells them “At least if you are practicing archery, you won’t be having so much time to prank half the sect to dead” the girl grins, A-Ying scowls and Jin Ling notices that his little brother looks so much like Uncle Cheng that he has to contain a laugh

“A-Mian! The ghosts in the forest were your idea!”

“Yeah, but unlike you, I didn’t get caught!” the girl sticks her tongue out at him in an arrogant expression, A-Ying pouts and starts to bicker with her. A-Ling looks at both of them fondly and chuckles at his baby brother’s antics.

For all Jiang Cheng is worried about his nephew’s mental state, he can’t deny the sheer relief and warm fondness he feels when A-Ying blinds him with a smile the moment he looks at his birthday present. The bow and arrows he gives to him look ridiculously big in the child’s five-year-old hand’s, even if it was the smaller size he could find; Yanli and Zixuan send him a concerned look, one he can absolutely understand, he himself was doubtful when A-Ling’s letter said that his little brother wanted a bow, yet looking at the kid’s expression he can’t feel any remorse in his gift. (Jiang Cheng promises to stay for a few more days to help with any nightmares flashback that might happen anyway).

“Thank you so much Jiujiu!” Jin Ying beams, pushing back any worries the adults have. Jiang Cheng smiles warmly.

“Anything for my baby nephew” he teases with a grin, as expected, Jin Ying puffs his cheeks adorably

“I’m five now! I’m not a baby!” he pouts looking incredibly cute, causing his mother and older brother to coo and fawn over him. Jiang Cheng chuckles, in his past life, Wei Wuxian was the one who relentlessly teased him and kept saying how XianXian was three; even if those are fond memories, the Yunmeng Jiang’s Sect Leader can’t help but feel relieved that his nephew is still a different person than his late brother, even with the same broken soul, the knowledge of that difference makes him feel that he can actually protect his late brother’s soul, that he won’t let harm come to A-Ying’s way again. He represses a sigh thinking how much he would like to protect him from his nightmares as well.

“Oh, you are so grown up now then?” he smirks making the kid deepen his pout, he chuckles “Well, since you are so big now, I think I can give you this then” he takes out of his robes a wooden box.

A-Ying takes it carefully, he looks at it curiously for a bit, then he opens it, his eyes widen in surprise

“This is-“ he turns to look at his uncle, who, behind his fond smile seems to be somewhat uncertain. With the utmost care he can muster, the child takes the ribbon out, where he can see better the Yunmeng Jiang’s clarity bell. Yanli contains a gasp at the sight, it’s not quite the one their brother had, but the sentiment is the same nonetheless, the emotion is enough for her to have to dry unshed tears.

“The Jiang’s clarity bell, it will keep your mind clear against hallucinations and I hope, nightmares” Jiang Cheng pats his nephew’s head “It also means that you are a Jiang, you are part of our sect, don’t forget that” he can see the kid’s eyes full of emotion and can’t help but wonder if deep inside his soul he recognizes it and recognizes the true meaning of his words.

“Now you can match with your brother” Yanli smiles softly, Jin Ying turns his head to them

“Like A-Ling?” he asks with such a hopeful, happy expression it makes it hard for everyone there not to squish the child in a hug. His older brother nods, pride all over his face at being the one his little sibling looks so starry-eyed.

“Of course A-Ying, look! I have one as well” Jin Ling explains taking out his own Jiang’s clarity bell, though the object is similar, the kids don’t notice how it’s different. Jin Ling’s, after all, is the one Wei Wuxian made for him, years after Jiang Cheng had managed to fix it and the protection spells the Yiling Patriarch had put into it.

Both kids beam at the matching bells. The adults look at them fondly as the trio of kids goes to play in the gardens, trying to make sense of the bow, Jiang Cheng chuckles once more before going to them, his worries disappearing for the moment.

~~~~~~~~~~

For the first nights, the clarity bell seems to work and the days go on normally, the kids get trained (A-Ying starting his archery training earlier), study, get spoiled by their grandmother and their uncles; despite Jin Zixuan being overwhelmed in work he has help, so everything goes well, it’s only until the night before Jiang Cheng’s return to Lotus Pier that everything changes.

That night, Jin Ying can’t find his clarity bell, but out of fear of being scolded he doesn’t say anything, he will look for it in the morning, he figures, and so, he goes to sleep.

After the first month of Jin Ying’s night terrors, his parents changed their room for one next to the kid’s bedroom so they could be there the instant either one (or both) of their kids had a nightmare; under that same reason, Jiang Cheng’s guest quarters were also pretty close to the children's room, so it’s natural for him that the moment he hears his nephew’s scream he bolts out of bed and runs to the infant’s bedroom, where his sister is holding her youngest with the oldest looking worried next to them. Yanli looks relieved seeing him there.

“He was calling for you” she explains before looking at the child in her arms “A-Ying, look, your uncle is here to see you” the kid’s sobs stop for a moment, and he peeks from his spot

“U-uncle Cheng?” he looks so uncertain and vulnerable, Jiang Cheng feels his heart breaking a little bit, for a moment he wonders if the bell was just not strong enough.

“Hey, I’m here kiddo, what’s wrong?” he asks with the softest voice he can muster, which is a feat all in itself. The child lets go of his mother so he can practically jump to his arms, now, Jiang Cheng is not the type of person one could call ‘affective’ or ‘cuddly’ or ‘to-know-how-to-give-comfort’, but he has learned from the little menaces to give hugs and pats once in a while, so for now, he sticks to his little knowledge of how to care for a scared child, and hugs the tiny kid, softly petting his back to try to calm him down.

This is quite hard considering just how much the kid is crying. They stay in that state until the Sect leader makes a move to try to accommodate himself better, which prompts a whole new reaction from Jin Ying.

“Don’t leave! Uncle please!!” his nephew almost yells desperate and Jiang Cheng panics

“A-Ying, A-Ying calm down, I’m not going anywhere” he tries to comfort but to no avail, the child keeps wailing in distress, looks like his nightmare was quite tough this time.

“Don’t leave!” the child cries and almost begs, Jiang Cheng wonders exactly what memory the kid dreamt of, he desperately tries to remember so he can soothe his nephew better, but then, the boy’s next words leave him speechless “Please don’t hate A-Ying! Uncle ChengCheng! A-Ying will give you his bright light again so please! Don’t hate and leave A-Ying!” he sobs, Jiang Cheng feels his arm and his entire body freeze.

“Bright light? What are you talking about A-Ying?” Yanli takes him again from his brother’s hands seeing his confused yet wary expression.

“I think he talks about a golden core” Jin Ling provides with a frown “A-Ying had this dream a few weeks ago, he said the man he always sees, and thinks is him, got his bright light removed” Jiang Cheng and Yanli pale, if Jin Ying’s dreams are Wei Wuxian’s memories, then… “Then he said the light was being put on Uncle Cheng’s body because he didn’t have a light, so the man gave him his own” the older kid stills frowns, even if he thinks his brother is talking about a golden core he doesn’t think that would be possible, after all, his teacher said the golden core was something valuable and precious to oneself, so why in this world would anyone give away a part so personal to another? And how could someone take a golden core even if that were the case? The eight-year-old young master can’t understand it.

“Is this true, A-Ying?” the kid nods, his sobs a bit quieter “Do you saw anything else in your dream?” Jin Ying curls, something deep within him tells him not to speak any further, like an instinct yelling at him, but his mother’s voice has an… urgent tone to it, he never dares to disobey his mother when she uses that tone.

“We were running… and then uncle Cheng was gone, and went to find him, and there were other people, two other persons, and then Uncle Cheng was sad, he said he couldn’t be leader anymore cause there was no light inside him!” for Wanyin, his nephew's words take him back to that time after he got captured trying to protect Wei Wuxian, even if he never told him so, the core-melting hand, his own feeling of loss, grief and uselessness; as Jin Ying explains that part he has a particularly desperate tone to his voice  “So… so! The person from before took A-Ying’s light and gave it to Uncle Cheng, but, but got scared cause Uncle might hate A-Ying if he knew so, so-!”

Yanli still tries to calm down the kid, but she looks at Jiang Cheng and he can see her distress. What the child is saying is correct in other aspects, him almost losing his sanity at the loss of his own golden core, him refusing help from his brother, the despair of said brother, the other two must be the Wens, all of that is correct, then, then…

Jiang Cheng stands rather quickly; he puts a hand on his nephew’s soft hair and pats it.

“A-Ying, you are my precious baby nephew, so I would never hate you” he says in a soft voice, Yanli can hear a few taints of helplessness in it, after saying those words he gets out of the bedroom. The older Jiang has a feeling of where exactly he is going, so after she manages to calm the child down, she leaves A-Ying with his older sibling, and she goes to find her own baby brother.

She finds him exactly where she thought, in front of their brother’s altar, with an unsheathed Suibian in his hands.

“A-Cheng?” she can barely believe her eyes.

“He gave me his core, didn’t he?!” his voice sounds raw and wet, even if she can’t see his face, she knows he must be crying.

“I-” she really doesn’t know what to say, a part of her refuses to believe it, it should be impossible in any case, she knows that, but… but the truth is that no one has been able to unsheathe Suibian, no one except for her son. “It would seem so” she honestly tells him. For Jiang Cheng, the confirmation of his thoughts feel like a punch in the guts.

“WHY??!! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT??!! WHAT WAS THE POINT OF ME PROTECTING YOU IF YOU WOULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS??!!” he falls to his knees, grief hitting him all over again.

“A-Cheng!” Yanli runs to his front and sure enough, her brother is crying as he grasps Suibian’s hilt tight, she hugs him, mindful of avoiding the unsheathed blade.

“WHY?! YOU SELF-SACRIFICING IDIOT!! YOU DIDN’T HAD TO DO THIS!! WHY??!!!” he screams with hurt and pain, Yanli can only tighten her hug around him, her tears also fall from her eyes “Why… why didn’t you told me? Why did you let me think you abandoned me?!” Jiang Cheng’s voice is raw and vulnerable in a way Yanli had never heard before, it makes her chest hurt and she sobs “Why didn’t you let us protect you?!”

She understands exactly what her brother means. If Wei Wuxian had told them that he didn’t have a core, then everything would’ve made sense… why he didn’t touch his sword anymore, why he was more tired, why his body didn’t look as healthy, but especially, it would have explained perfectly why he had to turn to the demonic arts, and with that explanation, they could’ve planned something, the could’ve helped him, the could’ve protected him from the other clans. It was a hypothetical guess of course, but the lie, even if it hurt Jiang Cheng the most, it pained Jiang Yanli as well, ‘We could’ve saved you’ she thinks grieving her younger brother all over again, now with bitter guilt tainting her mind and heart.

They stay like that for quite a while, Jiang Cheng hugging Suibian and Yanli hugging him, until they hear a couple of tiny steps.

“Mom? Uncle?” Jiang Cheng stiffens hearing Jin Ling’s voice, Yanli dries her tears with her sleeve and turns to see her oldest, behind him, a still sniffing Jin Ying peeks from his brother’s side.

“Kids, what is it?” she tries hard to control herself

“Is uncle Cheng angry?” A-Ling wonders quietly “A-Ying wanted to apologize”

Yanli exchanges a look with her younger brother, who sniffs and dries his tears.

“Why would A-Ying want to apologize for?” she asks in the most neutral tone she can manage.

“I-I made uncle ChengCheng angry” Jin Ying’s voice sounds painfully soft and sad, both Jiang's siblings flinch a bit.

Jiang Cheng spares one last look to Suibian’s blade before sheathing it. He can no longer do anything for Wei Wuxian… but he can at least protect his soul in Jin Ying. He turns to his nephew, opening his arms.

“Come here A-Ying” he beckons, the kid tightens his hold onto his older brother’s robes before letting go and walking to his uncle, who hugs him tight. Yanli goes to Jin Ling and hugs him as well, comforting her eldest for being so brave and taking care of his sibling “I would never be mad at you for something like this, alright?” he feels the kid’s nod “It’s not your fault, okay?” he pats softly the kid’s hair, who only nods again.

“I went quickly to look for A-Ying’s bell” Jin Ling explains to his mother “Little Fairy had it, I already scold her”

“Well done A-Ling, you did well protecting your brother” she smiles at her son and he beams at the praise

Jiang Yanli turns to look at her younger brother and her youngest son, she feels a warm sensation at the sight. They couldn’t protect A-Xian… but they would make sure to keep A-Ying safe, she swears that on her life.

-Bonus-

“Sect Leader Jiang, fancy-looking you here” Jiang Cheng scowls, he keeps his hatred deep down, remembering the promise he made to his late brother.

“Lady Wen” he mutters bitterly. Right after leaving Koi Tower a week later than expected to ensure that his nephew was free from nightmares, he goes straight to the Wen colony hidden in the back forest of Lotus Pier, where he keeps them to both ensure their safety and to serve as his own penance for not helping his older brother when he had the chance.

“What do we own the favor of your visit?” Wen Qing asks pleasantly enough, she still looks a bit worn down after all these years if he has to admit. Jiang Cheng sighs once, it’s not a pleasant visit at all, but it’s something he has to do.

“I know” is all he says, a tone cold a just a tiny bit accusing. Wen Qing looks at him confused

“You know… what?” Jiang Cheng moves his hand to the position his golden core sits and Wen Qing’s eyes go from bewildered to guarded “What… how… who told you?” she scowls and seethes just a little, it was Wei Wuxian’s wish to never let him know, and now he does. ‘It’s impossible’ she thinks ‘No one is supposed to know but us!’

“A-Ying did” he answers

“Young Madame Jin’s child?” she arches an eyebrow, not quite understanding, Jiang Cheng nods once.

“He… he is Wei Wuxian’s reincarnation” he admits, he can see Wen Qing’s eyes full of doubt, so he explains “You know how Suibian sealed itself?” the doctor nods “Well, Jin Ying unsheathed it” the woman’s eyes grow wide and get a bit moisty “Ever since then, he has been having nightmares, memories, from Wei Wuxian’s life… and recently he had one where someone took his shiny light and gave it to me” the accusation is obviously there, he doesn’t even try to conceal it “You wouldn’t know anything about it, would you? Lady Wen?”

Both of them keep a starring match for a few seconds until Wen Qing sighs

“I refused at first” she admits this time looking down “He was just so stubborn, he looked and looked for a way, and then he found my manuscripts and begged and begged…” she closes her eyes for a moment, reliving the memory “Ultimately he used the ‘older-brother' card against me, so I couldn’t…” she sighs again, not for the first time she wonders if Wei Wuxian could’ve live longer if she had refused more strongly

“The… older sibling card?” Jiang Cheng looks at her disbelieving, honestly, he had come wanting to fully understand why that idiot had done something like that… but now he is not so sure he wants to hear it

“He cried and begged, saying how he was your older brother and how he had failed to protect you, then he asked me if I wouldn’t do anything to protect A-Ning” at the mention of the fierce corpse, Jiang Cheng has to keep himself from growling “After that I had to accept” she frowns, remembering the sheer despair in A-Xian’s voice at the time.

“Was it painful?”

“If I told you ‘no’, would you believe me?” she has a sad, pained expression on her face. Jiang Cheng sighs

“How long?”

“Two days and one night”

“That idiot!” he growls, guilt and pain flowing inside him

“He never wanted you to know, he was afraid you would either hate him or hate yourself” at her words he remembers A-Ying’s wails ‘Don’t hate A-Ying!’ so he forces his negative feelings to retreat “Now you do, so make sure to care of it” he bitterly nods “And… take care of him as well... it’s the least he deserves”

“You don’t have to tell me that” he scoffs before bowing to her and leaving

He allows one more moment of grief before shaking his head, can’t dwell on it too much, either way, it was not what he wanted. So Jiang Cheng goes back to Lotus Pier, he has quite a lot of Sect’s issues to catch up on after all.

Chapter Text

Year 6

“Wangji please…” Lan Xichen asks begs, for what it seems like the tenth time already, yet his brother doesn’t seem to be answering him any time soon. The Sect Leader Lan sighs, if not because his uncle asked (more like ordered) and because he is extremely worried about his younger brother, he wouldn’t be pushing him so hard “You already left seclusion three years ago, uncle and I-“ (and the elders) “Think is a good idea for you to reappear in public” for the elders is about political matters, for Zewu-Jun is a little sign that his brother won’t seclude himself again “What better opportunity to use than the next Conference in Lanling?” he explains trying to sound cheerful, yet no sound comes from the Jingshi, Lan Xichen has to contain a sigh, he didn’t want to use it, but he is out of motives now “It’s going to be the first competition of our juniors, including Sizhui, don’t you want to support him?” he asks

It’s a low blow and he knows it. Even in his self-imposed seclusion, Wangji made sure to not become his father by helping his son in every way he could, Lan Yuan had lived inside the Jingshi until he was old enough to move to the disciple residence, yet every evening he and Wangji spent precious time together in which he taught him the Guqin, among other things, sometimes they talked, sometimes they played together, sometimes Sizhui would sleep in his parental figure’s lap as said parental figure would sing to him, the only thing that was abnormal in that relationship was that Sizhui came in and out of the Jingshi, while Lan Wangji did not.

Inside the house, Lan Xichen hears shuffles and pretends not to hear the slight groan from inside, it’s not good that his brother is still secluding himself for any period of time, and he knows the only thing that can help him with recovery and grief is his son, Lan Sizhui, so he tries not to feel too guilty about this. He has to try a little harder when his younger brother steps out only to send him a glare full of betrayal and hurt that Xichen has to remind himself that this is for the best.

Probably

The first night of the Conference is just a banquet with all the Sects leaders, some up-coming on age heirs, some advisers, and first disciples. Lan Wangji hates every minute of it. These are some of the people who wanted his son dead for his name, these are some of the people who celebrated Wei Ying’s death, the second jade has never had such a hard time actively trying to not kill someone, especially hearing Sect Leader Yao complaining about demonic cultivators and how a disgrace it was to the cultivation world, he doesn’t call him by his name, but everyone knows what he means, and it has Lan Wangji seething with rage. And he is not the only one, Sect Leader Jiang looks one second away from stabbing and strike him with Zidian, both Sect Leader Jin and Young Madam Jin have dark expressions as well.

“Ah it seems Sect Leader Yao is most acquaintance with Demonic Cultivation” Jin Guangyao, Jin Zixuan’s adviser, smiles politely yet coldly “It surely isn’t a surprise considering how many of Wei Wuxian’s inventions the clan uses in their night hunts” his eyes get sharp staring at the man with cold killing intent “It would be most unfortunate should the Jiang Sect or the Jin Sect banned your cultivators from using such grand devices, you know, for the sole purpose of being consistent with your ideas” that was the most elegant way Wangji has hear someone call hypocrite at one’s face

“You son of a-“

“Sect Leader Yao!” Jin Zixuan glares at him “I may remind you that this is but a banquet and you are merely our guest, I would appreciate it if you stop slander the ones who have passed and focus on the competitions of the next days, also I’ll ask you politely to not offend my brother” the man’s glare is deathly, almost as the one his wife has, the minor sect leader pales considerably and bows in apology, his pathetic scared face almost makes Lan Wangji stop glaring at him… almost.

After that incident the banquet goes smoothly, when most of the guests retire to their quarters Yanli sighs relieved, by the time that only the major sects’ leaders stay to discuss political things, she excuses herself to go find her sons. After the offense to her late brother, all her alarms are on, and she has the immediate need to check that they are alright   

~~~~~~~~~~

Which they are.

Jin Ling had taken his baby brother and Mianmian to play with him and his friends, taking advantage that all of them are yet too young to enter the formal meeting, including Sizhui and he is the oldest one.

They spent the evening playing in the near woods, with such energetic kids as Jin Ying and Mianmian, it had almost been a training of sorts

As it grows late, the children walk back to Koi Tower, with Jin Ying and his best friend leading the way, both kids had been talking animatedly; Lan Sizhui, who grew up the last few years with the rules of the Lan Sect, can’t stop himself from admitting that the time spent with his friends is soothing and relaxing in the best of ways. It’s only when he hears the youngest Jin singing in front of him that his thoughts stop altogether 

“Inquiry?” Lan Sizhui is quite surprised hearing the six-year-old kid humming the familiar tune, that melody is from the GusuLan Sect, so how come this kid knows it?

“Ah, Sizhui-ge knows it?” Jin Ling wonders walking next to him, behind his brother “A-Ying has been humming it in his dreams, and even when he wakes up sometimes” he shrugs. Lan Sizhui tries very hard not to gape

“Mmn” he nods “It’s a… melody from the Lan Sect” he says trying not to give up its function or importance

“Is it?” Lan Jingyi asks looking at him somewhat confused.  

“It is, you’ll learn it after you master the guqin” he explains to his friend “I only know it because Huanguang-Jun…” he trails, he shakes his head, that’s a private business that only him, his guardian, and the ones who walk by the Jingshi at night knows “I wonder how or why does your brother knows it, A-Ling” the kid tries hard not to blush at the name, Sizhui is older than him and they have known each other of a few years, so it makes sense he could call him by such name, still…

“Who knows? Maybe he knew someone from your sect in his past life” the kid moves his hand dismissively

“His past life?” Zizhen-xiong looks at him surprised

“Yeah, mom says that A-Ying’s dreams must be memories from another life, I only heard parts and bits that she told to my father and jiujiu” he would’ve explained further, but then he looks at their mother calling for them, and so, with a bow, he runs after his brother who all but jumps to young Lady Jin’s arms

Sizhui tries very hard not to stare at the kid. He wonders if this is something his father should know

A-Ying loves his family. He really does, his family is the best, he has an awkward but doting father who he likes to tease a lot (he may go overboard and actually make him cry with the full power of his heartbreaking baby bunny eyes, but that's okay cause he gets cuddles afterward), he has a beautiful mother who loves him dearly, who is kind and sweet and overall, the best mom ever! He also has the best older brother, that also dotes him a lot, is his partner in crime and comfort person during and after the nightmares (His older brother is the best, it doesn’t matter that Uncle Cheng says his was). Speaking of uncles, he has the three coolest uncles ever! Two war heroes, one sect leader, the other the most intelligent person in the world, and the other being the most pretty and kind uncle ever. So overall, A-Ying loves his family, he really does… but there are sometimes, such as this, that they can become a little bit… overprotective (that’s the term he understands from his still not quite broad vocabulary).

It started in the morning when A-Ying asked for his father's permission to see the competition among the other sects’ leaders and the place where his father and his brother would definitely be. Zixuan and Yanli exchanged a look. His mother tried to convince him to do something with her instead, and while in other instances A-Ying would love to spend time with his dear mother, he could painfully tell that she said it as a form to keep him from the competition. But why? A-Ying had been good lately! He hadn’t made any pranks in two whole months! Why won’t mom let him take a look at the archery competition? Sizhui-ge would be there as well! As the youngest junior to participate at that! Surely it would be a valuable learning experience, right? And besides, he was also the second young master, of course at some point he would have to meet the rest of the Sect Leaders, better to start now, right?

As he explained all his reasoning his parents started to look grim and dark, in all fairness, it wasn’t like he actually wanted to meet boring old men, but he did want to go to watch the archery competition! And gege was expected to go, so why couldn’t he go as well?

“A-Ling has to be there as the next heir, you still have a lot of years before you have to take responsibilities of a second young master, so why push it?” his father reasons “Surely you have more fun stuff to do with your friends here at home” the kid pouts

It’s not like he doesn’t have any other friends besides Mianmian, it’s just… he doesn’t trust the other kids who have tattle on him on multiple occasions just to save themselves from punishment or a scold… fine! so maybe he does not have any other close friend than Mianmian, and the girl would be helping her mother with the competition anyways which was utterly unfair in his opinion.

But Jin Ying doesn’t want to tell his parents that, because if they know they would be worried and then he wouldn’t be able to do anything! Like now. Instead, he starts throwing a very deliberately and carefully planned temper tantrum, which, according to Jin Ling’s translator of his didi, means he runs away at the first opportunity to one of his hiding spots. The older kid sighs at his little brother antics

“I’ll go get him” he tells his parents that are on the verge of panic cause there’s one last meeting before the competition and Koi Tower is full of strange cultivators and their kid is the reincarnation of the Yiling Patriarch and what if they notice and-

Jin Ling bows to his concerned parents and proceeds to go find his troublesome baby brother 

Lan Wangji can’t really stand another meeting, not with Sect Leader Yao nor Sect Leader Chang or Ooyang anyways, so he doesn’t. Hanguang-Jun makes his way out of the place, and takes a walk by the gardens, it’s peaceful sight and he feels almost calm

Then he hears it.

It’s a soft humming, almost imperceptible, yet there it is… his song, Wangxian

‘Impossible

He follows the sound to a little clearing, where the sound echoes through the foliage, among the trees, Wangji can pinpoint the origin of the sound, in a high branch of the middle tree there’s a silhouette, it’s… smaller than he hoped or expected. For the first time in the last couple of years, he isn’t sure of what to do, the humming that comes down from the person in the branch is unmistakably Wangxian, his song, their song. How anyone else besides A-Yuan could know it? Did Wei Ying share it with another? If so with who? And why? Before he can dwell too much into the questions he hears another voice, a childish one that he isn’t sure he has heard before

“A-Ying! Come on, you can’t run away every time-” the voice stops and Lan Wangji turns around to see a child, roughly 8-9 years old, dressed in Jin gold that promptly freezes upon seeing him “Hanguang-Jun!” the child hastily bows, Wangji can distantly remember him being the Jin heir and one of Sizhui’s friends “Uhm… sorry… I just-” the kid stutters, fighting to know what to say, up in the tree, the humming stops to Wangji’s dismay “This disciple apologizes for the intrusion” he says in perfect etiquette if not for a tone that betrays his nervousness “I was just looking for my little brother”

Wangji nods and steps aside, the shock from hearing his song combined with the curiosity about the second young master of the Jin sect makes him wonder out loud

“I heard someone humming, so it was second young master Jin…” he feels someone looking at him from above, even if he tries to catch a glimpse of the mysterious figure among the branches

“Apologies Hanguang-Jun, my brother is a little shy”

Lan Wangji shakes his head, no matter the curiosity and the tiny bit of despair he feels, he shouldn’t make kids any more uncomfortable, so he bows to the young master and takes his leave, with his heart and head in turmoil for the rest of the discussion conference, and even if he searches among the many people in Koi Tower, he only sees the second young master the very last night

In retrospect, they should’ve planned better. This might be the first time Jin Guangyao and Jiang Cheng agree on something (other than their nephews are pure cinnamon rolls and deserve to be protected always), and that is… that they fucked up.

After many months of debate and pointless meetings, the main sects finally reached the conclusion of making Lan Qiren the new Chief Cultivator, being the last one of his generation and the most experienced elder; normally he would take care of every single detail of the Conference, but due to sect matters and other incidents, he had asked Xichen for help, who in turn had asked Mingjue who finally had asked Huaisang. Which now left the Jins and the Jiangs with the stressful situation of having their second young master in the same room as Sect Leader Yao and Sect Leader Ouyang because the second young master Nie had arranged their seats so both children were invited

Jiang Cheng curses under his breath and tenses when both kids make their way to the room and bow with perfect manners, he allows himself to relax a little when no one stands up to point their finger at his precious baby nephew. He takes a deep breath and forces himself to relax further, while it’s true that Jin Ying does have a resemblance to Wei Wuxian, the Jin genes in him are undeniable, plus, being a kid he still has a soft aura that is similar to his mother, besides, just because he and Yanli can see their brother in him, doesn’t mean that the rest of the sects will actually recognize him, after all, only they know how Wei Wuxian looked when he was a kid; even so, it’s still a stressful situation for the whole family with the exception of the two children

Fortunately, the conference’s ending banquet goes smoothly, despite multiple people flattering the pair of Jin siblings, no one makes a real connection, Jiang Cheng and Jin Zixuan give an internal sigh of relief at the fact that their threats and all their hard work to contain the gossip of that fateful day four years ago were successful. If there’s anything the Jiang Sect Leader is slightly concerned with… is the second jade.

Lan Wangji hasn’t stopped looking at A-Ying since he entered, his eyes narrowed and wary, it’s enough to make Jiang Wanyin rigid in his place. If there’s anyone else capable of recognizing Wei Wuxian within a li that would be Lan Wangji; looking back at it, they never revealed Wei Wuxian’s reincarnation to him, he did mourn Jiang Cheng’s brother, yes, but the Lan was also the one that used to pick fights with him back then, at least that was the reasoning Jin Guangyao had to give them when they discussed it, but in reality, Jiang Cheng knew… they forgot. With the panic, night terrors, possible child’s trauma, more panic and desperately trying to keep the secret within the family they just forgot about it, and anyways, what was the point of telling him now? Jin Zixuan has asked once, the man was in seclusion for many years and then kept himself inside Gusu’s borders to be close to his kid; so when the question of speaking to the second jade about Wei Wuxian’s reincarnation aroused they just… didn’t tell him. And now, said cultivator was looking at his reincarnated brother/nephew with a highly suspicious glare, not that said kid minded it, he also throws curious looks at him every now and then, but mostly his attention was occupied by his sibling who was telling him all about Lan Sizhui helping him with his own archery lessons

Even so, Jiang Cheng’s, Jin Zixuan’s, Jiang Yanli, and Jin Guangyao’s stress will not fade until the damn banquet ends and they can hide their little sunshine away from prying and dangerous eyes. If the innocence of the Wen civilians wouldn’t stop the cultivation world from condoning their torture and abuse and subsequent savior, who was to say that they would spare a child from having the same soul and memories as their hateful Yiling Patriarch. The family would prefer not to find out, and yet…

Looking at it in retrospect, Jin Guangyao knew that the whole situation was going well… too well. So it did not surprise him when the incident happened, and he just had half a brain cell to thank the heavens that most of the guests were already drunk out of their minds and the rest were on that same track, really, serving Yunmeng’s most strong alcohol (thanks to uncle fourth) has been the greatest idea ever (Jiang Cheng and Jin Guangyao would fight over whose idea it was, but in reality, it had been Yanli’s suggestion). So there aren’t many conscious people when it happens.

Just as the Lan Sect are bowing at the host family to take their leave, Jin Ying looks at the beautiful person #1 with wide eyes, the one that has been looking at him all dinner with a funny expression, his eyes are specifically glued to the end of the forehead ribbon of the man that talked to his gege a few hours ago. Earlier he was hiding in a specific place that no one could see him from below but he could see everything from above and Jin Ying has never seen someone so beautiful before… aside from his mother, but that was because mother was the most radiant angel ever (Jiang Yanli would politely disagree and say that her children were the angels) but in any case! He lived in Koi Tower the most golden and shiny place in the shattered! And he spent quite a lot of time in Lotus Pier too, the most exquisite, elegant place ever as well! So why is it seems like neither of those places or their people could hold a candle to this cultivator? Jin Ying liked pretty things, which is why he loved his Jiang bell and spent a lot of time with his pretty uncle Yu, but he has never in his short life, seen someone so beautiful as the man in white robes in front of him and next to Sizhui-ge

As his mind keeps rambling and some part of him nags him towards his weird dreams, his train of thought seems to crash when he sees the end of the ribbon dangling in front of him, he has a weird feeling of deja-vu and, his body moving in instinct, his hand reaches to it like a cat that caught its prey and pulls even before he thinks about what he is doing.

The ribbon then comes loose and it flutters from Lan Wangji’s forehead to the tiny hands of the kid in front of him and absolutely everyone quiets down; as the people recover from their shock, the kid examines the ribbon in his hand, completely unaware of the chaos he just unleashed

“Pretty ribbon” he mutters in awe. Hearing the voice of her youngest, Yanli snaps out of it

“A-Ying” she calls him sternly, noticing the minute flinch Lan Wangji gives hearing the child’s name “That was rude, please give Hanguang-jun his forehead ribbon back”

“Why?” he asks in innocence “It’s just a ribbon”

“Just a-” Lan Qiren looks one second from Qi deviation, which prompts Lan Xichen to crouch to the kid’s height

“Ah, second young master Jin, for us Lans, the forehead ribbon is very special” he smiles at him and Jin Ying looks at him in awe, he is very beautiful as well… not as much as the other gege though, still, he nods, thinking about it “It’s so special that only family and significant others can touch it” he explains, hopefully not having to enter the romantic talk with a 6-year-old, the kid then turns to have a very serious expression, which Lan Xichen thinks is quite adorable and turns to Wangji

“A-Ying apologizes for taking special ribbon” he extends his arm and puts the ribbon in Wangji’s hands “A-Ying will take responsibility,” he says and both Jiang Cheng and Jin Ling feel a shiver run through their backs, a forewarning that the kid is about to do something troublesome “So wait for A-Ying to grow up and let’s get married okay? Okay!” he says smiling so brightly than more than one has to avert their eyes. Behind him, Jin Zixuan chokes with his own spit while Jin Guangyao, Jiang Yanli look in bitter amusement, seems to be that Wei Wuxian doesn’t change no matter the life, Lan Xichen has to contain his laugh at his uncle’s expression at the child’s imprudence

But then, Wangji, who was watching the whole scene with nostalgic yearning, takes one look at the kid’s bright smile and can’t keep himself from giving that smile anything he wants, so he nods, which sprouts another round of chaos

He doesn’t mind them as he watches how Jin Ying’s face beams at him, the expression so familiar that his heart clutches in both relief and grief

‘Looks like you got your family back Wei Ying’ he gives the small second young master a smaller smile of his own that makes him shine with the power of his pure, innocent smile ‘I promise, I’ll protect your smile this time’

Seems that Lan Wangji will have to thank his brother this time, him leaving seclusion is not so bad after all   

Chapter Text

Year 7

Mo Xuanyu, recently named Jin Ziyu, finds himself walking around the lotus pond Jin Zixuan built years ago for his wife, the day is bright and, since he already finished his respective duties as cultivator, he can take the time to enjoy a quiet stroll around the gardens without worrying about anything else. His golden core has come to form nicely ever since he was brought back to Koi Tower, even if the first year was hard; back when he recently arrived, his father only called him over when he had to talk to one of his half-siblings, Jin Guangyao, aside from that, Jin Guangshan completely ignored him and the mistreatment he was suffering at the hands of the other Jin disciples, which made especially hard for him to form a golden core, but that was only for half a year until his father died during a strange accident. Even back then, Mo Xuanyu was bewildered at how, despite public mourning and grand ceremonies, not one person in the entire sect missed him, not even the kids who he saw clearly playing around every day and not once visiting the ancestors' shrine 

But it’s not like it really surprise him the tranquility everyone took Jin Guangshan’s death with, Jin Zixuan, his elder half-sibling is an excellent Sect Leader, one that is determined to clean up his father’s mistakes, even now. At that time, just a few weeks after the ceremony that formally named him the Sect Leader of Lanling Jin, Zixuan started a deep cleansing inside Koi Tower, this was supported by Jin Furen, Jin Guangyao, and even he helped a little. Mo Xuanyu didn’t think he did much, but by being his meek, timid self, many people that abused him bragged revealed to him how they knew about the former prisoners’ treatment, or the way they hid many corrupt machinations, obviously, Xuanyu told everything to his brothers and together, they were able to strip those cultivators from their power and cleanse the Jin Sect from the rot their late father had allowed to fester

The next thing Jin Zixuan did was to reclaim all his half-siblings, it took two years to convince elder Madam Jin to do so, and they needed her to agree as to convince the elders of the sect of not only making Jin Guangshan’s past indiscretions public but to also receive any bastard that desired to learn cultivation. Mo Xuanyu wasn’t supposed to know about it at that time, but he had listened to a conversation between young Madam Jin and Madam Qin about young lady Qin Su, and after that, he had overheard his elder brother Zixuan talking about it with their brother Yao and well… Mo Xuanyu suspected that was the true reason Madam Jin had accepted to finally let them be acknowledged by their brother rather than their father, at least that way they could do damage control and save some face via taking responsibility for the late Sect Leader's actions. During this discussion, Jin Zixuan also formally changed their half-brother’s name from Guangyao to Ziyao, as it was supposed to be from the very beginning.

That happened a few months ago, yet, for Mo Xuanyu it's still weird to be called third young master or even Jin Ziyu, but he can't deny that it makes him feel a deep sense of belonging. It also helps that ever since his father’s death, the bullying, and abuse from the other sect members stopped almost completely, and the ones that kept bothering were promptly put in place by the one and only Koi Tower’s younger terror: Jin Ying

The kid is fiercely loyal and protective of who he calls his own, so any person that dares to mock any member of his family or friends is soon to suffer from either a thousand feathers in their bed, honey hiding in their pillow, ominous shadows cast by blankets appearing to be ghosts, their clothes stolen or filled with chili powder, among other relatively harmless yet incredibly annoying pranks. Honestly, Jin Ziyu has no idea how his nephews manage to make so much mischief and more and still be in time for their training and family gatherings

Jin Ziyu chuckles a little as he walks to where he spots the kids playing in the garden, remembering the last prank to a few of the Jin elders who badmouthed both his and Yao-ge’s mother; after hearing them, the children, somehow, managed to put half a dozen peacocks inside their elder’s council during one of their meetings, of course, Zixuan had scolded them for that, but it was half-hearted at best, with him poorly disguising his own amusement

“Uncle Yu!” Jin Ying’s voice sounds delighted when he notices him

“Xiaoshu!” Jin Ling sounds slightly more formal, probably because he already started his disciple and heir training

“Hello” Jin Ziyu kneels beside them “What are you young masters doing today?” he asks with a soft smile on his face 

“We are making flower crowns!” Jin Ying beams “A-Mian had one this morning and she said her mother made it for her as a present! So, so! We thought of giving one to mom and dad and uncles and-“ Ziyu chuckles at the kid’s ramblings 

“So you want to make flower crowns,” both siblings nod, the younger certainly more excited than the other “mind if I help you?”

“Thank you Xiaoshu!” Jin Ling also smiles at him

The three Jins spend a comfortable time making crowns with the flowers around them

“Gege stay still!” Jin Ying says after some time, before he reaches to put his creation on top of Jin Ling’s head, as the heir turns his head preening, Jin Ying and Jin Ziyu make approval noises and clap in response “Gege looks cute” A-Ying giggles to A-Ling’s scowl

“I’m not ‘cute’ I’m handsome! Right Xiaoshu?” he turns to Mo Xuanyu who has to stifle his own laugh, he looks so much like his father like this “Of course A-Ling, the most handsome of all Koi Tower” he is delighted to see a shy but proud blush in his nephew's face, they are so cute 

Unfortunately, the moment gets interrupted by a disciple

“Apologies Young Masters” he bows properly to all of them “Madam Jin and Young Madam Jin are asking for young master Jin Ling’s presence in their salon” the kid groans quietly

“Is it time already?” ‘Ah’ Xuanyu gets it ‘It must be time for his etiquette lessons’, a-Ling gets up carefully as to not dislodge the flower crown his little brother made for him, it’s a completely adorable sight “Xiaoshu, a-Ying,” the Jin heir bows to them perfectly with his accessory on his head and two more crowns carefully tucked around his arm, presumably for his mother and grandmother “I’ll see you at dinner” the younger sibling and himself bow in response, even if Jin Ying giggles while doing it and he himself has an amused smile on his lips

After Jin Ling leaves, Mo Xuanyu and Jin Ying stay in the garden, weaving flowers for the rest of the family

“Uncle Yu!” the youngest kid beams with a beautiful crown with red and pink peonies in his hands “Stay still” he orders in his best big boy voice. He does as his nephew says with a soft expression and a warm feeling inside his chest as the kid arranges the flowers on his head. Then, he moves back to admire his job and nods pleased with himself “Uncle Yu is the prettiest!” he declares with pride, the warmth grows even more; Jin Ziyu giggles and puts his own weaved crown on his nephew’s head

“Oh, I don’t know about that a-Ying, you look pretty cute yourself” the child perks

“Pretty enough for Zhan-gege?” he asks with a soft blush

‘Oh my’ Xuanyu thinks with no little amusement ‘Someone has a baby crush, how cute’. Mo Xuanyu still remembers his first ‘love’, a young boy from the Mo village, it was cute and soft and perfect until his awful cousin had to ruin it by calling him a cut-sleeve in the middle of the village, which he was, but Mo Ziyuan had said it as if it was a disgrace, of course, the boy never went near him again, even going as far to lie about how he thought he was a girl with all the makeup he used. He shakes himself from that painful and humiliating memory, he has a family now and he won't ever have to return there now that his mother moved to Jinlintai, courtesy of his big brother Zixuan  

“Hm, this Zhan-gege wouldn’t be the prestigious Hanguang-Jun, would he?” he teases his nephew who turns a delightful shade of pink, his cheeks puff up and he looks very much like his father whenever young lady Jin compliments him “If I remember correctly, didn’t you propose to him last Discussion Conference? How did that go?” he hides a smirk behind a polite smile, normally Mo Xuanyu is quiet and gentle, but he, much like Jiang Yanli, has a mean streak when teasing his precious nephews is involved, they are just too cute to not poke them like that

A-Ying proves his point when he squeals and hides his red face behind his hands, and the resemblance with Jin Zixuan is uncanny. Jin Ziyu giggles and his laugh only accentuates when the kid sends him his most powerful childish glare from behind his hands, which is mostly just a pout really

“Father forbid a-Ying from marrying” he pouts more freely once he lowers his hands, his face still pink “But! He said that when a-Ying grows up he can marry whoever he wants” the child beams, Jin Ziyu stifles a heartfelt laugh

“Of course you can’t marry now a-Ying! You are a baby, our precious baby” he reaches to squish his nephew’s cheek, which earns him another adorable squeal

“So you want to marry Hanguang-Jun when you grow up?” he asks again

“Yes!” the kid smiles brightly 

“Why?” in all honesty, it isn't as if he himself didn't understand, Lan Wangji is an upstanding cultivator, strong and righteous, how the man is still not married is actually a mystery if one thinks about it, but still, those are things a child normally doesn't take into consideration when having a crush, so he is quite curious about Jin Ying's reasoning 

“Because he is pretty” a-Ying answers simply, causing Mo Xuanyu to almost choke with laughter 

“You can’t marry just because he is pretty!!” he says once he composes himself, the kid pouts again

“Why not?” he sulks and Jin Ziyu has to contain himself from laughing again, just because he is currently holding the position of favorite uncle (thanks to his soft personality and similar makeup to young Lady Jin. Sect Leader Jiang and Yao-ge are still sulking about it), doesn't mean he is safe from any pranks the kid can come up with (Only Jiang Yanli is completely safe, not even elder Madam Jin can say the same)

“Because!” he teasingly stresses the word “You marry someone you fall in love with, not just because he is pretty” he says in an obnoxious tone to imply how obvious it is 

“Then I’ll fall in love with Zhan-gege” Jin Ying declares with his tiny arms crossed and a determined expression as if it's the most logical solution, Jin Ziyu can only gap at him 'Is this kid for real? '

“What if you fall in love with someone else?” he metaphorically pokes holes in his so-called plan 

“No! Only Zhan-gege! He is pretty and he played with me last time he visited, and he plays music and, and-“ 

“Alright, alright I get it” Jin Ziyu placates his nephew before he develops his whining into a full temper tantrum “Geez kid” he remembers the rumors that say that Jin Ying is the reincarnation of the Yiling Patriarch and silently wonders if the man was as stubborn as his nephew is

“Uncle Yu…” after a while, the boy’s voice sounds tiny and a bit vulnerable, the older Jin turns to look at him concerned about it 

“Yes, a-Ying?” he puts his hand on top of Jin Ying’s head, careful to not dislodge the flower crown

“Is it bad to want to marry Zhan-gege?” he asks in a careful tone “To want to marry… another boy?” the kid turns to him with his baby bunny eyes, on the verge of tears, and unlike his brother, jin Ziyu can see when they are real and when they are not, these ones are right in between. Still, Mo Xuanyu takes a deep breath, thinking of the things he once wanted someone to tell him

“Is not bad that you like other boys like that, is not bad that you want to marry another boy” he reassures him with a gentle expression “And it’s not bad that you have a crush on your Zhan-gege, but a-Ying, you are still too young to think about stuff like marriage…” another devastatingly cute pout “You are way too young to think about marrying a person who you just met and who is way older than you” he makes his point with a boop to his nose, earning himself some giggles from the adorable youngster 

“But I like Zhan-gege a lot” he says, and Mo Xuanyu is relieved to hear him a bit more cheerful 

“And that’s fine for now…" he concedes, softly patting his head "I’ll tell you what, if after your age-of-majority ceremony, you still want to marry him and if your Zhan-gege decides to court you properly after it, then I’ll help you convince your dad and uncles, how about it?”

“Promise?” the kid raises his pinky

“Promise” he sighs inwardly, already pitying his brothers and Sect Leader Jiang "Now, I think these crowns are already done, what do you think?" the child beams and nods

Both of them stand up and dust their robes from where they were kneeling on the ground, Jin Ziyu chuckles as they walk to see his half-brothers, Jin Ying with his crowns delicately in his hands and rambling about his new lessons, and the last visit to Lotus Pier, and how Mianmian and he found a big frog on one of the ponds and- 

Once they reach the main studio where the sect leader and his right hand are, Jin Ying bounces to deliver his gifts. Jin Zixuan absolutely cries when his youngest son presents the yellow peonies’ crown in his hand and convinces him to wear it for the entire day with his teary baby bunny eyes and an ‘I made it especially for father, won’t father wear it?’, if after that, his brother Jin Ziyao is also teary-eyed about the gift from his nephew, then that’s something only Mo Xuanyu, now Jin Ziyu, notices.

Chapter Text

Year 8

Jin Ying breathes in and out, he prepares the two arrows before giving one spin and with his eyes closed, releases them

“Woah!” Mianmian looks impressed and claps seeing both arrows hitting the bullseye “You are getting pretty good at this trick of yours shixiong” she teases making him blush as he opens his eyes, ever since they started proper cultivation training in the sect she has been calling him shixiong, which never fails to make him feel like the dependable elder brother which in turns makes him feel a little bit shy, even a year after she started, he wonders if that's what Jin Ling feels when he calls him gege

“Thanks, shimei” he teases back “But I feel like it’s not enough” the young master pouts 

“What’s not enough?” Mianmian tilts her head in confusion 

“In my dream, I used 5 arrows at the same time” the kid explains, she looks at him incredulously

“Well there’s a reason why it was a dream, that sounds impossible!” the girl argues

“It felt so real though! ‘Sides, I’m half Yunmeng Jiang, we are supposed to attempt the impossible” and Jin Ying, being the Jiang’s sect heir, takes that motto way too seriously, at an almost personal level, one might say

“You can’t base your life around your dreams anymore A-Ying!” Jin Ling’s voice reaches them in the archery training ground, both kids turn to see the sect’s heir

“Gege!” Jin Ying beams at his older brother, before pouting when his words actually register “But they feel so real! What if they are prophetic dreams or something, if that’s the case I should be able to shoot five arrows with my eyes closed!!”

“Hmmm considering how one of your dreams showed you as the father of Hanguang-Jun’s kid, Sizhui, I seriously doubt they show any near future” Jin Ling half teases his brother, the other half is him scowling at the mental image

“Gege!!!” Jin Ying screeches with a red face

“Hanguang-Jun? is that the old man shixiong proposed to two years ago?” Mianmian wonders with a smirk

“Zhan-gege is not old!” the child protests “Stop slandering my future husband!”

“He is our father’s age” Jin Ling frowns “And stop calling him that, you are not going to marry him”

“I touched his forehead ribbon, remember?” Jin Ying says smugly as if it hadn’t been an accident and an imprudence on his part

“You have seen the guy like four times before he went into seclusion” Mianmian points out “And I seriously doubt he sees you more than the cute kid who stole his ribbon and just so happens to be the younger sibling of his son’s friend”

“You think I’m cute?” a-Ying perks at that, completely ignoring everything else  

“Yeah, yeah, you are adorable” Jin Ling pinches his cheek while rolling his eyes, looking very much like Sect Leader Jiang, in Mianmian’s opinion “You are my cute didi, but the point is that you are not getting married alright? I forbid it” he lets him go and Jin Ying caresses his red cheek as he sticks his tongue out to his mean elder brother “Anyway, I came to get you, we are going on a night hunt on Yunmeng and dad wants you to come” the kid practically shines at those words

“Really? I get to come with you?”

“Yes, I think you get to train with the Yunmeng Jiang junior disciples” Jin Ling laughs at the betrayed look on his sibling’s face, the junior disciples in the Jiang Sect are quite older than him but not enough to participate in the advanced hunts with his uncle and father, so they take it on him by treating him like a baby, coddling him and cooing at every little thing he does; when he was younger it was nice, now they just tease him and stop him from doing anything fun, which in other words, means that Jin Ying is going to do absolutely nothing while being babysitted with the added bonus of not leaving him in Koi Tower to unleash yet another prank fight with Jin Chan and his cronies “Let’s go a-Ying! This is going to be great!”

Mianmian has to contain her laugh at her friend’s pouty expression as he follows his brother

~~~~~~~~~~

The trip to Yunmeng is uneventful, just as they arrive a bunch of aunties run to hug and pinch both young masters’ cheeks, Jiang Cheng has to fake a cough to hide his laugh, while Jin Zixuan freely snickers with a twinge of smugness, his children are quite adorable after all.

During that first day, Jin Ying gets to accompany his older brother and a bunch of other disciples to ask for information about the creature, the juniors shamelessly use their shidi’s cute, big eyes that look so much like his mother with only a twinge of silver if looked in the right light. By the evening, the boys report to both sect leaders about the sightings of the resentful creature in one of the farthest forests behind Lotus Pier.

That night there’s a small feast that includes the select group of juniors to talk over the details that they will need to take into consideration for the hunt, both Jin juniors engage in the discussion, specifically, Jin Ying adds some suggestions of talismans he recently learned in his classes that they could tweak to use to their advantage, Jin Zixuan and Jiang Cheng exchange a glance, the genius of Wei Wuxian’s soul is something so impressive that doesn’t change in either life it seems

The next day, the chosen juniors, his father, uncle, and brother go out fairly early in the morning, leaving him in the squeezing hands of his babysitters

~~~~~~~~~~

Jin Ying stands it over a total of four hours before he makes his grand escape, it’s not like he is planning to go to look for the monster, he really is not that dumb, he is just a kid and doesn’t even have a sword yet, it’s just… the forest at the back of Lotus Pier is the only place he has never ever gone to, the only place his jiujiu never lets him go, so this is a great opportunity as any to explore, he figures. He takes his bow, the one that his jiujiu gave him and he still clings to despite becoming considerably smaller for his age, and decides to go on an adventure! After all, it’s just the forest and he still is in Lotus Pier, what could go wrong?

Several things actually, as he looks at the ominous presence that has stalked him for the last hour. For starters, there’s this… pull he can feel, it’s nothing like he has ever felt before, though it’s remarkably similar to what he feels in his worst nightmares, the ones with the man with long, black hair and dark robes, the one who raises the dead with a black flute; but there's more... besides that uncomfortable sensation, there’s also a pull, he has that feeling like when someone calls for him yet there’s no voice. All around him there's a dark energy that continues to build up until something crashes with him, sending him a few meters back

Jin Ying groans at the pain he can feel bloom on his arm, he stands carefully and turns to the direction where he came from, there’s a Yao in front of him. It’s huge and reeks of resentful energy; the kid actually shivers, more than a little scared, but before the creature can hurt him, there’s a shadow that puts itself between him and the monster.

He would never admit it to his brother or Mianmian never, but at that moment, Jin Ying closes his eyes at the terrifying sight, only opening them when a rough and soft voice tells him to, he turns to look at the strange yet familiar voice, only to see a fierce corpse in front of him. A talking fierce corpse

He tries to speak but a chill runs through his body, there’s resentful energy everywhere, and for some reason, he feels… weird, like some sort of déjà vu but not quite, Jin Ying can’t pinpoint it, he just knows that for some reason everything is muddled, his head hurts, it pulses the same way it does when he wakes from an especially terrible nightmare but it’s worse now somehow because he can’t wake up! The Fierce Corpse then kowtows in front of him, making him feel some sort of… rejection? Not exactly at the corpse, more like, he shouldn’t be kneeling to him, Jin Ying tries to stop him, but as soon as he takes one single step, the world vanishes around him

----------

Wen Ning had heard from his sister about young master Wei’s reincarnation, and looking at Second Young master Jin he can truly see it. His eyes are a few shades cooler than Sect Leader’s Jiang's and with the right light they look as shining silver as they had been back then, his face is slenderer and Jin delicate, but the righteous way his jaw clenches and the determined frown of his eyebrow, that’s young master Wei alright.

The sentinent corpse practically sways on his knees and bows to him, thinking how if he could cry he would cry tears of joy and relief, of pain, regret and guilt. But before he can utter a sound, the young child faints. Wen Ning can feel the claws of a panic attack in his mind but before it consumes him, he has to make sure to take the child to safety, ideally, he would prefer to take him to his jiejie to check on him, he was thrown back by a yao after all, but with Wen Qing making her monthly rounds throughout Yunmeng, the option gets discarded. He could, theoretically, go to Lotus Pier… Sect Leader Jiang prohibited him to enter unless it was an explicit emergency, and, looking at the vulnerable kid in his arms, Wen Ning is pretty sure this classifies as one. Making his choice, the fierce corpse lightly tightens his grip on the unconscious child and hurries to the Jiang medical pavilion

----------

“A-Ning! A-Ning!!” there’s a woman’s voice screaming, crying, he can feel the pure despair and hopelessness coursing through him, it’s bad bad bad, it’s cold, rain? The shadows creep inside him as he orders… someone to be awakened, his control is slipping, then-

“Wei Wuxian!” there’s a voice talking to him “Wei Wuxian!” who is it? “The corpses in the blood pool! They-!”

“Who let them out?! Who touched the talismans?! Didn’t I tell you not to touch them?!” a voice, his voice? yells at another person, but it can’t be right, his voice is not that deep, right?

“Nobody did! But-“ a roar sounds around the darkness “A-Ning!!” the desperation is building as the thrashing sounds continue “Wei Wuxian! Take granny and the others!!” ‘No!’ he wants to say ‘Let me help!’ he feels himself turn to someone

“Lan Zh-“ uh? There was someone there… someone important. A white ribbon flutters through the shadows before he can feel his body run into something or someone. “A-Yuan you are still here?! Wen Qing! Take him away!”

He can’t see anything, he can hear and feel and move, but his entire vision is drowned in darkness. The same feeling from before comes back, a slimy cold sensation running through his veins, passing through his fingers, clashing against a body. The roar of a fierce corpse that’s just in front of him is scary, terrifying. Pain blooms in his back and stomach, and warm arms envelop him for a second before he pries himself away. ‘He can’t know’ he tells himself ‘He can’t know about the coldness inside me!’

His body moves again, the fierce corpse sounds so close! There’s a single moment of wanting to run away because corpses bite and bite and bite and they are like dogs, who also bite and bite and thrash and it hurts and mama, baba where are you?!- But it’s alright, this corpse… he knows him, he is his friend, and he is going to come back! Pain again, it reverberates through his body, everything hurts, hurts to breathe, it hurts to stand, it hurts to- a guqin, a flute. He shivers, terrified of that flute, or is the sound only in his mind? A duet. He can feel the slimy, cold energy reach its peak, the pain doesn’t stop, even more, there is something on his chest that tightens, he wishes to be able to see down to see if his chest is still complete, he can imagine that there’s only a hole where his heart should be, bloody and painful.

The guqin also reaches its peak, the music also hurts, the pressure keeps building, it feels like it’s going to bury him. Then, a voice

“Young… Master…Wei…” he knows this voice. Is rough with disuse and rigor mortis, but he knows it!

“Wen Ning?”

----------

Jin Ying awakes with a scream. There’s a terrible moment when everything is muddled together, he doesn’t know where the dream ends and where reality begins, for a horrible second, he can only see the fierce corpse thrashing, in pain, not responding… but isn’t that normal for corpses? The rumors say that the ghost general of the Yiling Patriarch could think of his own, but that’s a lie, right? There’s no way corpses can talk or speak or… ‘Young master Wei?’ Wei… Wei Wuxian, is that name again. He thinks his mother told him who he was once… or was it Jiujiu?

Jin Ying’s hands tremble, the nightmare was an awful combination of scary sounds and desperate feelings, his lip wobbles, he uses one pre-written light talisman and he can see he is in his quarters at Lotus Pier, the bed across his empty ‘Gege is in a hunt’ his brain tiredly remembers, he whimpers and promptly starts crying and sobbing. It’s dumb, but he hurries to take a simple but soft stuffed rabbit, a birthday present from Zhan-gege, and his Jiang Bell. His core is still in the formative stages, but he can use just a spark of spiritual energy to warm up and ring the bell. He sounds it, once and then twice, until his nightmare stops being so vivid, he uses another spiritual energy surge to pass through his young meridians, enough to dissipate the cold and slimy feeling of the dream

Once he has calmed enough to go looking for tea or something in the kitchen, he stops at his door. In the hallway in front of his naked feet there’s a cup full of relaxing, warm tea; the cup itself looks rough, not polished at all, nothing like the one he uses here on Lotus Pier and even less in Lanling. He wonders who left it there. He sniffles and takes it, it’s still warm thanks to a weird talisman, he decides to keep it for further research, for now, he drinks the tea, there’s something really soothing about it, it almost feels like... like-

~~~~~~~~~~

The next day his father, uncle, older brother, and shixiongs arrive from their hunt, Jin Ying is asleep still when the healer tells them that a villager found Second Young Master Jin in the back forests, a Yao had attacked him but the wards made him leave quickly (if the healer doesn’t mention the presence of Wen Ning at all because he is a nice young man who brings him medicine from his talented sister and rare herbs from his dangerous travels well that’s only for him to know), and he explains that the kid only had a scratch and a nasty bruise to the overprotective and panicking relatives

“But the encounter may have triggered a nightmare,” he explains to them “a patrol heard something from his quarters, but when he went to see, Second Young Master was already sleeping again" 

By late afternoon, Jin Ying wakes again from another bad dream, this one full of people with his sect’s colors hurting other innocent people, old people, hurt people; he can’t see their faces very clearly inside the nightmare but he can feel the rage, the slimy sensation crawling through his meridians, the deep soul-biting cold where his golden core is supposed to form. This time is Jin Ling who wakes him

“Gege!!” Jin Ying cries as he launches himself into his elder brother’s arms. While Jin Ling works to calm his baby brother down, Jiang Cheng and Jin Zixuan have a conversation outside the room

“He called out for Wen Ning earlier, you know?” Jin Zixuan sends a look to his brother-in-law

“I know, I heard” the sect leader has to visibly restrain himself from spitting the words as poison, the other man looks at him carefully and adds in a neutral tone

“You know is not his fault, right?” Jiang Cheng tenses abruptly “Jiang Wanyin… what happened was not Wen Qionglin’s fault” he makes a pause in which he expects the other to yell at him or at least tell him how wrong he is, but as the younger Jiang stays quiet, he continues “Zixun was at fault, and possibly my father but we never found evidence of that…” of many crimes, yes, but never of that one in particular “What I mean… it was an accident, and even I bear more blame than Wen Qionglin” he winces at the reminder, Wei Wuxian had taken a hit meant for him, because he stupidly tried to approach a cornered man in danger “I don’t know how it was their relationship, but from what I saw, Wen Qionglin would’ve never hurt Wei Wuxian” he whispers. Even now, he is one of the few who dares to say his late brother-in-law’s name, even more so with the situation of his youngest son

Jiang Cheng seems so strung out that Jin Zixuan almost expects him to snap any given minute, instead, he deflates

“I know” he sighs bitterly “We all play a part in it… somehow the knife bears the least guilt” the words are heavy and it will take him more time to actually let go of all his pain and hate, but it’s a start, Jin Zixuan figures, as he looks at both of his boys, Jin Ling effectively distracting his young brother with overblown details of the hunt

~~~~~~~~~~

The incident should’ve stayed there. But three weeks back into Koi Tower, Jin Ying realizes that something or someone is following him, it’s nothing dangerous, or at least the kid doesn’t think it is. Mostly he just feels watched from time to time when he is out of the safety of the Tower and things that he thinks lost will return to him the very next day, his bow for example, after the attack of the yao back at Lotus Pier, his bow was lost in the confusion, but two weeks after he returns the bow is back to his room without so much a scratch, it’s weird, but not overly so, and his survival instincts don’t yell at him and they are always right, so he feels no pressure to tell his overprotective brother, overprotective parents or overprotective uncles

It’s only a month after these weird occurrences that he meets the one behind them: the talking fierce corpse. It actually happens in a similar manner as their first meeting, Jin Ying manages to escape his babysitters’ seniors and almost manages to crash the night hunt of his big brother, almost… because the fierce corpses find him first. Halfway to his ninth birthday, the second young master of the Jin Sect doesn’t have a sword yet, doesn’t mean he doesn’t know his way around talismans

He actually manages to stop the corpses for a second, but his abilities are still at the lower level, so the resentful creatures are contained for just a moment before making their way toward him. Is the moment one of the corpses lunges at him that he has one terrifying flashback to multiple of his nightmares, he flinches, just frozen in fear, then a shadow stands protectively in front of him, trashing the corpses and saving his life for the second time

Wen Ning turns around to see his young master looking at him with a mixture of terror and awe, the sentinent corpse somehow makes himself appear as smaller and harmless as possible

“S-s-second y-young m-ma-master Jin, w-what are you doing here?” his voice fails him for a second, a million emotions swirling inside him at the sight of the reincarnation of his old friend, someone who he saw as an older brother

“Woah” the kid looks less afraid now that he heard the voice that sounds in his dreams “Master Corpse is soo cool!!” If Wen Ning could blush he definitely would “You are the one who has been looking after me, right?” the Wen nods and Jin Ying beams, his chest feels warm with something, though he doesn’t know what it is

“T-this one is Wen N-ning, c-courtesy name Qionglin” he makes a stiff bow to the child who frowns, just like before, something inside him revolts at the sight of… Wen Ning (?) bowing to him

“It’s alright, you don’t have to bow to me! I’m Jin Ying! I still don’t have a courtesy name because I just turned eight, but I’ll be a grown-up soon enough you’ll see!”

‘You don’t have to bow to me’ he said. If Wen Ning could still sleep, he knows his dreams would be plagued by nightmares, specifically ones with him killing his benefactor, his best friend, his brother. He looks at the reincarnation of Wei Wuxian, cute, small, innocent, and bright, and still smiling at him like he is the best person in the world, like he isn’t a fierce corpse... like he isn’t a murderer

If Wen Ning could still cry, he would be sobbing.

“I’m sorry young master” he kowtows, unable to help himself. He knows that this version of his young master Wei won’t understand what he is apologizing for, but he needs to, he needs to say it at least once because the regret and the guilt grow a little bit more each day and threatens to swallow him whole. Soon, he feels a gentle hand on his cold shoulder

“What are you apologizing for?” Wen Ning looks up to the softest, brightest smile, one he thought he would never see again. For a moment he freezes, for a moment he can see young Master Wei smiling at him like always, a hand extended to him “You have nothing to apologize for, it was not your fault”

If Wen Ning could breathe, he would gasp. For those are the words he has longed to hear ever since that fatal day; he knows this is not his young master, but his reincarnation, his new life… still, he can’t help but feel that those words, those gentle, warm words come from deep inside, that some part of his master’s soul can recognize him and has relied on his new physical form to pass on his message. If someone can manage to bring back their memories to their next life, after all, is Wei Wuxian

“Young Master…” unconsciously, he takes the little hand offered, and just like that, the vision is over and he is in front of an eight-year-old again, but is different, of course is different

“It’s alright Ning-gege,” the kid beams at him “We can be friends!”

If Wen Ning had a beating heart, it would be beating out of his chest. But even in his dead state, he can feel a warmth inside him

“Alright young master” he has enough muscle memory to give a smile of his own “Let’s be friends” he is going to be in so much trouble, with both his sister and probably Sect Leader Jiang and Sect Leader Jin… but it’s all worthy when Jin Ying smiles at him with the same radiant expression he had that one time Wen Ning somehow managed to harvest potatoes

Different bodies, but the same bright soul

‘Welcome home young master Wei’

Year 9

Wen Ning is the best fierce corpse ever! Jin Ying decided; he plays with him when his brother and father are away, he takes care of him when he goes to explore outside Koi Tower, and most importantly, he helps him calm himself when he has a nightmare and his family is not available (with night hunts and sect duties and other grown-up stuff). So Wen Ning is his new best friend because Mianmian keeps bullying him and teasing him (“Aren’t you younger than me?! Respect your seniors!!” he tells her one day to which she just sticks her tongue out), and because he is such a good best friend, Jin Ying has the need to know everything about his undead friend, starting from his living place!

“The back forest in Lotus Pier…” he looks a little uncomfortable admitting it after the kid pestered him for weeks to get the information, and A-Ying can guess that he looks so distressed because Ning-gege can’t lie to save a life 

Jin Ying knows what’s in the back forests in Yunmeng, and it’s a huge ward protecting a very specific zone! So, full of curiosity he starts planning, researching, and studying wards, talismans, and the like. In the end, it takes him half a year to figure them out.

First, there’s a maze array, then an illusion ward, and then a protective shield. He gets to the last one before the force of the defenses tosses him away. Wen Ning, who gets out from the village to check out the intrusion, can see the unconscious young master a few meters away, for the second time he is in this specific situation, and for the second time he panics

‘What is young master doing here?!’ he thinks despairingly as he checks the kid for any injuries, fortunately, it looks like the backlash just drained him from spiritual energy. In any case, he takes the young child and takes him inside the village to Wen Qing’s office

The Wen doctor found out about their friendship a couple of months before, actually, Wen Ning had left out his qiankun bag unpacked after he returned from his ‘night hunt’ when she saw a tiny Jin handkerchief. Wen Qing asked him about it and nagged him until the timid corpse admitted that it was a gift from second young master Jin during one of their playdates

~~~

“Is this the reason why you have been hunting closer to Lanling the last year?” Wen Qing arches an eyebrow, Wen Ning looks down, even as a fierce corpse he seems distinctively embarrassed

“I-… Eight years ago I felt the pull of master’s soul returning” he admits quietly, Wen Qing is barely able to contain her surprise, it’s the first time she has heard of this “I didn’t know what it was, but I felt something calling me there, of course I never went…” he adds as a second thought “but then Sect Leader Jiang came and…”

Wen Qing looks at him, she should’ve known that he would be listening, considering the last thing their friend asked him to do was to protect their family, he's always on high alert when someone comes near the settlement

“You heard him” she says, it’s not a question. Wen Ning nods “So you know now that second young master Jin is…” she turns to look at the pale yellow handkerchief with the peony crest on it that her brother left on the table “How….” She gulps “What's he like?” she wonders in a weird moment of vulnerability, Wen Ning’s expression softens

“He has young Madam Jin’s eyes, but lighter I think, the same air of royalty as Sect Leader Jin, when he frowns he looks like Sect Leader Jiang” Wen Qing huffs and laughs at the description

~~~

Now, though, she can see what A-Ning meant. She starts scolding her sibling as soon as he enters her little clinic with an unconscious Jin child in his arms

“So what happened to him?” she asks as she starts to check his spiritual energy, Wen Qing freezes for a second, having a hard flashback to the moment she had that golden core in her hands. ‘Reincarnation is a scary thing,’ she thinks ‘if it can even give him the same spiritual signature’ 

“He managed to break through the wards,” Wen Ning explains “but the last shield lashed at him… it doesn’t look like it did too much damage”

“Of course it didn’t” she takes a vial of tonic off her shelf, a little medicine to restore his energy “He created them, they must somehow recognize him” which only adds to the knowledge of the kid being Wei Wuxian 

After Wen Ning helps his sister to give the remedy to the child, he decides to take the task of going to fetch Sect Leader Jiang to let him know where his nephew is.

Not five minutes since A-Ning left, the youngster opens his eyes, for a second, Wen Qing can see the silver orbs of the younger brother she adopted in the Burial Mounds all those years ago, but it’s only a mirage of the light and his eyes go back to be a lighter shade of Jiang Yanli’s. Those eyes look at her curiously

“Who are you?” he asks tilting his head, the healer sighs quietly

“I’m Wen Qing, Wen Ning’s older sister” she explains as she takes her mortar and continues to grind a couple of herbs to give the reckless junior

“Ning-gege’s jiejie?” the kid has literal stars on his eyes, Wen Qing has a second to wonder whether he has dreamt about her and their time as a family, since, according to her little brother, Jin Ying has actually dreamt about him, specifically about their meeting in Qishan and his turning into a fierce corpse

Those are not the types of dreams she would wish a young child to experience. Wen Qing nods

"And you are my little brother's friend" is not a question, the kid still nods enthusiastically 

"I'm Ning-gege's best friend!!" he practically squeals, the doctor allows herself a fond smile. Jin Ying notices it and stares for a couple of seconds, Wen Qing is about to ask what's wrong when the child softly whispers "Qing-jie..." 

She takes a harsh breath, pain, longing, and affection bloom inside her heart, she never thought she would hear those words again, no one else called her that since A-Yuan called her aunty and Wen Ning called her jiejie 

"How... why-" 'Why are you calling me that? How do you know? How much do you remember?' 

"Qing-jie... Do you know who is Wei Wuxian?" Jin Ying asks a little hesitant, he is sure now, that Ning-gege and his elder sister were the ones in his dreams, so they may know something about the man with the black robes and scary flute. The healer pauses for a second 

“Shouldn’t you ask that to your parents or uncles?” Wen Qing crosses her arms, the kid in front of her huffs, not unlike Sect Leader Jiang or his previous self

“They won’t tell me anything” the child pouts. He has tried, but every time his mother looks like she is about to cry, his jiujiu has this contrite expression, his father deflects and his other uncles just redirect the conversation hoping to distract him, the only thing he has managed to get out of them is that he was his Da-jiu and that he was a good man but nothing else, and any other disciples won't say anything in fear of being punished 

‘Of course not’ Wen Qing thinks exasperated, it doesn’t surprise her in the sightless that Second Young Master Jin has never heard about him, even A-Yuan knows more from his few fuzzy memories and Hanguang-Jun’s stories than from what he has heard on the streets or classes. Most people nowadays don’t even call him by his name, he is just the Yiling Patriarch the man who fought the war and won with demonic unorthodox cultivation, protected a bunch of innocents, and died when he was unfairly accused and ambushed by the Jins.

The Wen remnants might be isolated from the cultivation world, but Wen Qing goes fairly often around the surrounding villages to offer her services, that’s also a good way to keep up with the news. Even from the beginning, after his death, part of the main clan of the Jin sect (see: Madam Jin and Jin Zixuan) pushed for the stop of the Yiling Patriarch’s slander, a complete 180° turn from before, even if she wasn’t privy to the Jins’ way of thinking, it was obvious that the new campaign to redeemed his reputation was because Jiang Yanli was too distraught for years after her little brother’s death. During those days the name Wei Wuxian got less and less heard, knowing his circumstances stop the rumors and the people stopped blaming him for everything; when the Chang Clan died, the fact that Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan brought the true culprit, Xue Yang, to trial and he got executed also helped to the public knowledge that the Yiling Patriarch could not be blamed for everything as originally thought.

Jin Guangshan was already trying to deal with the huge loss of face Jin Zixun left them with after the death of Wei Wuxian, and Madam Jin and his own heir trying to console Jiang Yanli (who fell into a dangerous depression for a while), he couldn’t do pretty much anything back then to keep up the previous rumors. Soon enough, the name became a legend of courage and justice, and the Jins like Jin Guangshan became a synonym for greed, shamelessness, and betrayal 

So Wen Qing isn’t surprised that the kid hadn’t known his name, nor that his parents (particularly his mother) nor his uncle are willing to disclose information other than ‘he was your Da-jiu’, even without the whole reincarnation and memories thing, Wen Qing understands that everyone involved has certain feelings to even say his name. Seriously, even she as a proud doctor can’t even think of his name without feeling a lump in her throat  

"Wei Wuxian saved my family, your Da-jiu was a great man who fought for what was right, you should be proud of him" she says solemnly but not unkindly 'Be proud of yourself, be proud of what you accomplished in your previous life' she wants to say 

The child looks down not entirely convinced 

"But wasn't he scary?" there are a few books that depict him as a demon who controlled his army of the dead and besides, his dreams are pretty terrifying on their own. Wen Qing huffs 

"How could that brat be scary, when all he did in his spare time was whine about potatoes" she rolls her eyes fondly at the memories, earning a giggle from the young Jin, finally lifting up his spirits 

Wen Ning comes back shortly from sending a message talisman to let know Sect Leader Jiang that his nephew was here, and manages to distract the kid from his nightmares by showing him the village and playing with him. Jiang Wanyin arrives not long after that

Of course, he arrives strutting through the place, he reach the healer's office and without saying anything, he instinctively glares at the sight outside 

“A-Ning didn’t do anything” Wen Qing moves to protect the view of her brother playing around with the heir of Yunmeng Jiang, Jiang Wanyin huffs and frowns, but is different from his bitter, resentful scowl

“I know” he says “I’m just here to bring the brat back to the lessons he ditched in favor of exploring the back of Lotus Pier. Wen Qing still looks at him warily, Jiang Cheng sighs before putting in words what he has been thinking for months “I know he would’ve forgiven him, he would’ve forgiven all of us, I’m not holding it against your brother” he reassures her “The peacock is right…” he scowls as it pains him to say it, knowing him, it probably does “Wen Qionglin was not to blame for what happened, we all play a part on it… I forgave him already, as I forgave you” the admission actually surprises Wen Qing

“I can’t speak for him, and I won't say sorry for saving my family, but at least for me… for the part I played, I do apologize and I appreciate everything you have done until now Sect Leader Jiang” she makes a bow, which he stops almost immediately. They fall into a comfortable silence for a moment, then Jiang Cheng shakes his head as he looks at the running kid

“It’s just… hard, to see him and to remember what he chose, he was right, of course he was… he always was” he almost manages to avoid the bitterness of that statement “I forgave him, I forgave you, and your brother… It’s just hard to actually forgive myself”

“I know…” Wen Qing might admit it as well “It’s hard to forgive myself as well”

They all bear the blame, they all had a hand at extinguishing the bright sun that Wei Wuxian was, they can only try better with his reincarnated soul

‘No…’ Wen Qing thinks as she watches A-Ning trying to catch the giggling nine-year-old ‘This time we will better, we’ll protect him this time… all of us’ she huffs fondly just like Sect Leader Jiang behind her. Together they’ll protect the brightest, warmest smile, together they’ll take care of the little sun, their little sunshine

Chapter Text

Year 10

That day, Jin Ying wakes up feeling excited, it’s the first time he's been allowed to participate in a Discussion Conference! Despite being only ten years old, his abilities in archery have been improving by leaps and bounds in the last year, so uncle Jiang invited him to be part of the opening shooters for this year’s conference in Lotus Pier; of course, as the heir of the Yunmeng Jiang Sect he has to do it! It’s his duty! (and it doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that he threw the biggest temper tantrum in existence when he knew his uncle wasn’t even planning to let him near the conference in the first place). Thus, he prepares for the day with his best purple robes, the ones that his mother made especially for him, and goes to have breakfast

The family is reunited inside the dining hall, when Jin Ying enters he can see his father almost cry as he watches his baby using something else that is not Jin Gold. Jiang Yanli is obviously delighted and does her best to hide her anxiety, it’s been so many years, that no one is going to make a connection now, she knows that... but sometimes fear and grief can be hard to control

He takes his seat at the side of the room, next to him, his brother has an exquisite set of robes matching his but in their usual gold, Jin Ying beams at his gege who blushes furiously and starts eating without any comment. Today is Jin Ling’s debut as Jin Rulan, the Jin heir. His gege had received his courtesy name last year, and while he had gone to several night hunts led by seniors and Jin Zixuan and Jiang Cheng on occasion, this still is the first time he'll be hunting as the da-shixiong of the Jin sect, it's a very big deal, so Jin Ying is very proud of his amazing gege  

From the head of the room, Jiang Cheng looks at the siblings with fondness and a little longing, he really misses his brother a lot. As the breakfast comes to an end, the Jiang Sect leader clears his throat

“Well then, I think it is time the kids get ready for the hunt”

The children adorably beam at the same time as they run to the rooms, Jin Ying to get his bow and arrows and Jin Ling to get his sword Mudan (Peony), the adults left behind smile at the children's antics 

Because the discussion conference of this year is in Yunmeng, Sect Leader Jiang and his disciples planned the opening ceremony according to their traditions and focus on archery.

There’s a first group of ten disciples, the very best of the sect on one side, and the younger disciples that had their golden core recently formed on the other. The little ones toss talismans that don’t require much spiritual energy and take the form of birds, the archers aim, shooting their arrows, and the moment they hit the paper bird it explodes in a beautiful show of colored sparkles, they do this as the disciple in charged presents the sects: green for the Nie (Nie Mingjue leading with Nie Zonghui by his side), blue for the Lan (Lan Xichen riding at the head with young Sizhui next), yellow for the Jin (Jin Zixuan at the front with his heir Jin Rulan) and finally, purple for the Jiang

The Jiang contingent is led by Jiang Wanyin with Second Young Master Jin next to him as his heir, (everyone knows that sect leader Jiang isn’t interested in marrying so he appointed his nephew as his heir), the young kid is looking proud and regal in his deep purple robes with lilac lotuses embroidered by hand and his clarity bell tied on his belt, he still has his red bind on his forehead but for this occasion, he is wearing a lotus hair ornament instead of peony like usual, signaling his status as the future sect leader of Yunmeng Jiang (Jiang Cheng feels rather smug about this, both because is his nephew and because of what it would mean to his past self)

Jiang Wanyin steps aside and his cute, intelligent nephew takes the hint. Jin Ying’s horse starts galloping around the main circle, he takes his bow, and as a disciple tosses four paper talismans that represent the four sects, he aims and shoots four arrows at the same time, hitting the talismans as they would hit a normal paper kite (Ha! Take that Mianmian!).

The spectators grow wild with cheers and Jiang Yanli silently sighs in relief that nobody thought about her late brother shooting five arrows in the Jin conference back then, sometimes she feels a little silly about being so paranoid, but then she hears some comment about how 'good and peaceful is everything now that the Yiling patriarch is gone' and she sees Suibian in the stand all alone and all her grief and terror of that time when a-Ying first unsheathed the sword comes back to her. At least everything is all right for now, and she can enjoy being proud of her boys, both of them are so grown up… her eyes might become a little humid, but that’s only for her mother-in-law to see, and she understands the feeling perfectly

With one more round of applause, the rules of the hunt are set, and the barriers open, officially starting the night hunt.

“I really think this is a bad idea” Mianmian rolls her eyes yet does nothing to stop her best friend from sneaking inside the hunt’s grounds a couple of hours after the opening ceremony

“It’s going to be all right A-Mian, we just need to find gege and give him his lucky charm!” Jin Ying beams at her.

A few months earlier, Jiang Yanli had put together three beads bracelets with a protecting charm that she created herself for the three little terrors of Koi Tower

The kids (Jin Ling, Jin Ying, and Mianmian) didn’t take their bracelets off at all except for bathing, but since today was Jin Ling’s first appearance at a discussion conference’s night hunt as the Jin heir, he was so nervous that morning that when he put on his brand new robes he totally forgot his protective charm so Jin Ying, as the good little brother he is, decided to take the situation in his hands and bring the bracelet to him

“Yeah, right, and how are we supposed to find him?” Mianmian asks with sarcasm. Jin Ying doesn’t take the bait and instead takes out a talisman, one that the girl doesn’t recognize

“With this!” the kid exclaims “I modified a searching talisman and tuned it up with gege’s spiritual signature last time we were meditating! Now is a tracking talisman!”

“And how is it that you haven’t invented something to bring that to him instead of risking ourselves out here?!” the girl scowls at her best friend, really, for a genius, A-Ying can be so dumb sometimes. The boy freezes, seemingly realizing that such delivery talismans do exist, and he could’ve so easily modified one to suit this particular situation 

“W-well, t-that’s because I’ve been busy with other stuff and I can’t invent everything needed in this world at the same time” he childishly sticks his tongue at her, Mianmian can be such a bully sometimes he swears “A-anyway, let’s get this done with and get out before someone see us” the child stutters as he powers his tracking talisman which instantly reveals a bright golden line going into the distance 

Both kids walk towards the glow, they've only been in their search for a few minutes, the forest is in perfect calm until the sound of moving leaves and branches stops them; the protective arrays embedded in the bracelets start to shine, warning them from the attack a few seconds before it happens. Jin Ying jumps in front of Mianmian, drawing a repelling talisman that shouldn’t be as strong as it is since it makes the monster crash against and rebound off the shield the boy created in mere seconds

“A-Ying” Mianmian screams worriedly in reaction to Jin Ying’s groan at the sudden strain on his young, barely-there golden core, but it's not time to drop their guard just yet, the monster, a minor yao keeps circling them. Both children have talismans at their disposal as well as their bow and arrows, Mianmian even has a size-appropriate dagger courtesy of her mother, head disciple Luo Qingyang

Before the yao can strike again, Jin Ying uses one of his illusion talismans, one that covers the place in smoke, combining it with a minor fire array makes the monster screech at the loud noises that come from the little makeshift fireworks that explode all over the place, disorientating it. Next to him, Mianmian generates a shield array, while not as powerful as the one Jin Ying summoned, it's enough to give them some protection, she also follows the threatening shadow through the smoke and fires two arrows in rapid motion, hitting the creature once as they hear the painful shriek

The talismans are strong but they still have a limit, one rather small considering the size of the kid’s core, so it's no surprise when soon enough the smog clears and the fireworks die down; the children can see the arrow sticking out of one side of the creature, making him bleed some nasty looking black substance. The monster turns to look at them, its eyes full of resentment and for a second, Jin Ying loses himself in them, angry whispers filling his head and making a spike of pain flash inside his mind

The feeling is both so foreign and familiar that makes the young master blank out for a moment

“A-Ying!” is Mianmian’s voice that takes him out of it, just in time for him to instinctively shoot an arrow right at the monster’s eyeball as it charges at them

The monster screeches in pain and dodges them, circling them once more, Jin Ying shakes his head clearing his mind, and puts himself in front of his friend; because he was the one with the idea to enter the hunting grounds, is normal for him to take responsibility for his actions and protect her, even if Mianmian is physically stronger than him    

A few seconds pass in that tense stalemate when the creature comes back for them, this time obviously pissed off, as the children take their stances, quite tired from the strain on their young golden cores, a sword flies through the clear and stabs the yao through its heart, making him shriek one last time before it dies

Before the kids can turn to where the sword came from, a silhouette jumps in front of them, they see the back of a figure that saved them, the cultivator is regal and elegant, with white robes so beautiful that they are mesmerized by them for a moment, Jin Ying has only seen one person like this before

“Zhan-gege?” he quietly whispers, for any cultivator his words are as loud as normal speech volume though, so it’s no surprise when the hero turns to greet them

It may have been three years since Jin Ying last saw the most beautiful person he has ever seen, and he might’ve been young but he would never forget the soft jade-like expression of his precious Zhan-gege nor his beautiful golden eyes and bright, kind smile… Jin Ying feels an almost unbearable disappointment seeing that their unknown hero isn’t him. Though now that the kid can see him clearly, it’s quite obvious that this person is someone else, although he wears shiny white robes as well, he doesn’t have a lovely head ribbon nor any other sect-related token to begin with

“I apologize young one, I may not be the person you were hoping for” the soft voice reminds Jin Ying of Sect Leader Lan, but that’s all he can draw from this person, he shares a confused look with Mianmian. The cultivator smiles gently at them and bows “I’m Xiao Xingchen, pleased to make your acquaintance” 

The girl recovers from her shock first, giving the cultivator a thankful reverence, which the Yunmeng Jiang heir follows promptly

“We thank Xiao-qianbei for his opportune rescue and we apologize for any trouble we may have caused”

“Is no trouble at all young lady, though I must admit I didn’t know sects allowed disciples so young to enter the hunt” he says, a faint disapproving tone in his voice

“They don’t!” Jin Ying admits hurriedly, quite alarmed of anyone thinking badly of his sects, Mianmian gives him a sharp nudge with her elbow, the kid winces but continues despite his friend’s protests “It’s just…. My brother forgot something important and we wanted to return it” he explains, he thinks for a moment and continues “Are you a rogue cultivator qianbei?” Jin Ying asks just like that, causing Mianmian to stomp on his foot for his imprudence “Stop it!” he hisses to his friend

The young man giggles at the kid’s antics

“That’s correct young one" Xiao Xingchen kindly answers "I must admit that I’m a little lost concerning the sects, so I wonder what young master am I talking to?”

“Ah, this one is Jin Ying from the Lanling Jin sect and heir to the Yunmeng Jiang Sect”

“This disciple is Luo Mianmian, also from the Lanling Jin sect”

“It’s an honor to meet such distinguished young disciples, however, I think this might not be the appropriate place to keep this conversation” he smiles courteously 

“Wait! We need to take this to gege!” Jin Ying panics thinking that the adult is going to take them back (which he is), so the kid busts out the bunny eyes and looks at him with the cutest look on the earth

“Alright, alright, how about I accompany you to look for your brother and then I escort you back to safety? Does that sounds good?” the cultivator manages to reach a compromise with the two adorable menaces, though Jin Ying is about to protest that they don’t need an escort when Mianmian elbows him on the side, the traitor

“We would appreciate that very much” the girl answers with all the diplomacy a ten-year-old can manage “We thank Xiao-qianbei”

The group of three starts moving, following the golden thread from Jin Ying's talisman (which admittedly, Xiao Xingchen is very impressed by as the kid keeps telling him details about this particular invention and others, chattering as they walk through the forest), until several minutes later, the kids finally see the group of yellow robes debating about where they should go next

“Gege!” Jin Ying squeals with delight the moment he lays eyes on his cool older brother that’s obviously taking the leadership of his small court

“A-Ying!” Jin Ling looks at him with surprise before frowning, looking eerily similar to his jiujiu “What are you doing out here?! Don’t you know is dangerous?!” the smaller kid pouts at his brother's scolding

“So mean gege, even when I went so far to bring you this” he whines as he takes out Jin Ling’s charm. The Jin heir’s eyes turn comically wide towards his wrist in alarm, before composing himself and snatching the bracelet once he confirmed that it was indeed his

“Shut up A-Ying!” he yells in embarrassed anger, but after putting the charm where it belongs he grumbles a “Thanks”. Jin Ying gets to enjoy his brother’s gratitude for about 3 seconds before the young teen starts berating him again “That still doesn’t excuse you from putting yourself and Mianmian in danger! Don’t you know there are powerful beasts here that could’ve hurt you?! How is it that you are even more reckless now that you are a sect heir?! and Mianmian! What were you thinking letting him loose in the first place?!”

“Hey!” Jin Ying gets to protest with a pout for a second before the girl next to him jumps in her own defense

“It’s so not my fault that the second peacock prince here is so stubborn!” she snaps

“A-Mian!” Jin Ying shrieks in outrage at the sheer betrayal

The three kids are about to butt heads as usual when an amused giggle sounds behind them, they (as well as the rest of the Jin disciples who were watching with different levels of fondness and exasperation) turn to see the mysterious voice. There, in the shadow of a tree is resting the cultivator that saved Jin Ying and Mianmian earlier; both of them blush in embarrassment at their behavior

“Ah… this one apologizes for the interruption” Xiao Xingchen gets out of the shadow and puts an affectionate hand over Jin Ying and Mianmian’s heads. Jin Ling frowns in confusion at this stranger acting all sorts of friendly with his baby brother and friend (bad enough is that A-Ying keeps whining about how he can't see the second jade, his destined husband every time he receives a present from the Lan sect)

“Ah, that’s right gege! Xiao-gege helped us find you! Isn’t he cool?!” Jin Ying gushed, cleverly omitting the part where he actually saved them from a yao. Jin Ling makes another pass over the guy before bowing in respect

“This one thanks qianbei for his assistance in helping my idiot younger brother” Jin Ling sees right through A-Ying’s lying baby eyes and summarizes that the unknown cultivator must’ve done something amazing to protect them (which meant that the kid had been in danger in the first place), his baby brother will be hearing it from him later

“It’s nothing young master Jin, I was just passing by, my name is Xiao Xingchen” he answers politely. At the sound of the name, Jin Ling makes a motion, and all the disciples behind him comply bending in respectful greeting

“The Jin Sect thanks Xiao-qianbei, Baoshan Sanren’s disciple, for his protection of our sect’s second heir and disciple, we also salute our senior and congratulate him for his raising in the cultivation world"

“It’s all right young master Jin” he returns the respectful bow “it’s good to see the Jin sect has such good disciples” most of the teens blush at the words “It would be a pleasure to hunt with you more often” all the kids practically beam at the unsaid proposal “for now though, I’ll bring this two youngsters back to the towers” Jin Ying whines and complains for a solid 5 seconds before receiving an elbow to his ribs, effectively silencing him

The young disciples watch in amusement how the second young master complains and grumbles as they walk away. When the little group reaches the public camp where the sect’s watching towers are, a dainty figure comes running toward them

 “A-Ying! Mianmian! I was worried sick, where were both of you?!” Jiang Yanli asks as she hugs them

“We met a very kind cultivator mom!” the boy says in a cheerful voice obviously avoiding the question, at his words, young lady Jin turns up to see the man and immediately recognizes him from Xue Yang's trial

“Xiao-gongzi” she gives him a polite bow that is promptly returned “Is good to see you again” she smiles “How is Song-gongzi?”

“Ah, Young Madam Jin, is an honor as always” Xiao Xingchen also smiles and the combined kind aura of both adults is sufficient to lull the kids into a safe and warm feeling “Zizhen is good, he is actually inside the hunting grounds” he turns to the children next to the madam and gives a mischievous smile “I just happened to find two young disciples while looking for a place to rest”

The feeling of safety abruptly ends as the kids feel goosebumps at the glare surely Jiang Yanli is sending them

“Children?” she prompts with just one word that echoes all through their bodies and both of them just know how much in trouble they are

“We might’ve gone too close to the border” Jin Ying says side-glancing at Mianmian because if there’s one thing he can’t do is to lie to both his mother and his uncle Yao looking at them in the eyes (the latter because he is able to read you with just a look and the former because his mom is a literal angel who doesn’t deserve such unfilial act from her own child) 

“Hmmm” she hums incredulously

“It’s true aunty!” Mianmian says trying very hard not to sound desperate 

“Sure, sure” she answers to placate the children, for now... “Would Xiao-gongzi and Song-gongzi like to join us for the private banquet tonight?” Jiang Yanli turns her kind smile to the cultivator who looks fondly amused

“I thank young Madam Jin her invitation and of course, we'll be honored to assist” Xiao Xingchen gives a final reverence to the mistress before going back to the hunting grounds

It appears that the evening just got more interesting

After the hunt ends and the winners have been announced (Xiao Xingchen in first place, Song Lan in second), the two rogue cultivators follow Jiang Yanli into the Jin dining hall where the other Jin family members are waiting, they receive them with warmth and gratitude, Jin Ying especially runs toward them in a mixture of excitement and shyness, hugging the man in white and introducing himself to the one in black

The dinner is nice and the conversation is entertaining, especially with the rogue cultivators telling the kids all sorts of tales, including their dream of founding a sect not based on blood ties, of course, the adults give their own suggestions and pieces of advice, which turns into talking about politics, the children try to stay in the conversation, being that both of them will be sect leaders someday, but soon enough their eyes are dropping so elder Madam Jin takes her cue to take the children to bed and leave the cultivators to talk about more adult things 

“Xiao-gongzi, is it true that you are Baoshan Sanren’s disciple?” Jiang Yanli asks politely in the middle of the tea, the question makes Xiao Xingchen stop for a second, a curious tilt of his head as he smiles

“That’s right young madam Jin” he answers easily, while it's a very well-known fact there are a lot of people who believe that's bullshit, Song Lan is always furious when stuff like that happens; even now, Xingchen can feel his partner tense in anticipation for any altercation that might arise. Instead of dismissing the claim or wanting to know more about the immortal and her techniques, young Madam Jin asks a question neither of the rogue cultivators expects 

“Did you, by any chance, met Cangse Sanren?” the surprise both of them feel at the inquiry is only surpassed by the wonder they feel seeing the bright twinge of hope in both Jiang siblings. The two rogue cultivators exchange a look

“Ah, unfortunately, I was still very young when she descended the mountain” Jiang Yanli and Jiang Wanyin visibly deflate, making the pair quite confused "If you don't mind me asking, but why would you want to know about my shijie?"

“}Well..." the two siblings look at each other, willing to touch a subject they don't talk to strangers often "My late brother was her son” lady Jiang says quietly  

“The Yiling Patriarch? Wei Wuxian?” Song Lan asks, his eyes widening in surprise. Most of the common talk is that Wei Wuxian was the son of a servant, Wei Changze from the Yunmeng Jiang Sect, though most people conveniently forgot about his mother, the most powerful disciple of the famous immortal 

“My shijie’s son…” Xiao Xingchen's voice turns into a whisper, in shock from finding a familiar connection only to be cut from it “How… What…” he has to take a deep breath before continuing “I've heard about the stories, but I have to ask... what happened? What was he truly like?"

Jiang Yanli can't stop the melancholic smile on her face as she recounts her memories of her little brother 

“He was kind... selfless, he learned about the conditions of the Wen remnants and he throw himself into saving them, without even caring about his statue or the things he could lose...” she pauses, a familiar pain blooming inside her chest, nobody says anything about the moment she needs to take to compose herself "All the things he lost... he did everything in his power to help that little group of non-combatants who were unlucky enough of being called Wen, my little brother took a place of death and resentment and turn it into a home, a sanctuary for the people that needed it, for elders and a child who were unjustly mistreated" she speaks with pride and fondness 

“He was a self-sacrificing fool” the Jiang leader comments bitterly affectionate "He left us all behind to do what was right" he admits "He was always running head first into danger, he was like that even when we were kids, the brat" Jiang Cheng huffs annoyed 

Xiao Xingchen looks at them in awe, his martial nephew sounded like such a nice, just person, that he feels a small wave of grief course through him at the knowledge that he could've known him. The rest of the evening is spent with both Jiang siblings and one Jin Zixuan, telling stories about the youth of Wei Wuxian, making the rogue cultivators laugh with more than one anecdote of little Wei Ying and his sect siblings running all through Yunmeng. As the night settles in Lotus Pier, Jin Zixuan and Song Lan retire to sleep, leaving the trio to keep sharing memories  

Before turning to bed, the couple of Jiang siblings show Xiao Xingchen his memorial tablet at Lotus Pier, which also has a couple of tablets dedicated to his parents, Wei Changze and Cangse Sanren, finally set in the place where they deserved during the rebuilding of Lotus Pier. A last-minute addition that Jiang Cheng always wanted to show his brother after telling him during Jin Ling's one-month celebration... before everything went wrong, he tries to shake those thoughts as they show Xiao Xingchen around Lotus Pier's ancestral hall

“This is his tablet, right next to his parents” Jiang Yanli says as she gently lights up a stick of incense and respectfully bows to her younger brother’s and his parent's name, Jiang Cheng also lights up a stick of incense and leaves in the altar but he stays in the doorway, still not used to the sight of his late brother’s name on a memorial slab 

Xiao Xingchen walks forward and pays his respects to the small family, starting for his shijie (according to their rules up in the mountain), he bows to her, her husband, and her son 

“Where's his sword?” he asks young madam Jin

“It stayed with me back in Koi Tower” she answers looking melancholic at the memorial "His dear Suibian"

“Suibian?” Xingchen asks with a raised eyebrow, not believing for a second that his martial nephew would be so disrespectful towards his own sword, and the giggle from the young mistress all but confirms it  

“You see, when A-Xian was a kid, Father asked him how his sword should be named, he thought about it a lot but he wasn’t convinced by any of the names, so he told my father to just call it “whatever”, basically he let him decided, but father took that literally and when he gave it to him, the sword truly was named Suibian” she giggles at the memory and brings a laugh out of the rogue cultivator “Father said that it was something he thought Cangse Sanren would've enjoy” Xingchen smiles at that, by the stories his master and other older disciples used to tell, he can totally see his Shijie doing exactly that "Sometimes I come here, or to the shrine back in Lanling just to talk to him, like I used to do before when we were kids and I couldn't sleep" she turns to the man and smiles knowingly and sweetly "You are A-Xian's family, so you and your own will always have a place here and in Koi Tower, so you can come to talk to them whenever you want"

"Thank you so much young Madam Jin-"

"Please... call me Yanli" she turns to look at him with a kind expression 

"Alright, Yanli, then you should also call me Xingchen" he accepts and both of them share a smile. They return to their own rooms a few moments later, Jiang Wanyin leading the rogue cultivator to the room next to the one he gave to Song Lan so they can all turn in for the night

Xiao Xingchen can't remember most of his childhood, he was too young to remember his birth parents, too little to recall the cold... and despite being too small to recollect the warm arms that carried him up to the mountain to be received by Baoshan Sanren as a last favor, he always knew that he owned his life and cultivation to the beautiful, rebellious disciple Cangse Sanren. He grew up listening to stories about his Shijie, admiring her and wanting to follow her steps, so he was so obviously heartbroken when he walked down from the mountain only to learn that both his Shijie, her husband, and her son had died, the first two, mere years after his Shijie went down the mountain, while the latter died recently, barely a year before, of course, he wrote his master about it and even though he didn’t get a response from her, he knew how deeply sadden she would be by the fact.

Xiao Xingchen wakes up in the middle of the night, a nightmare fueled by the stories he has heard over the years about the Yiling patriarch and the combined image that he has now of his martial nephew takes him from his deep slumber

He remembers the words from Jiang Yanli ‘Sometimes I come here, or to the shrine back in Lanling just to talk to him, like I used to do before when we were kids and I couldn't sleep’

So he walks to the memory hall, which stays always bright thanks to special light talismans invented by Wei Wuxian of course. Xiao Xingchen kneels before the altar and meditates as he gives a prayer to his late nephew; he is in the middle of it when he feels a little body colliding with his side

“Hi” the sleepy and sad voice takes him out of his meditative state, when Xingchen looks down he sees the tiny second young master Jin codling him

“Hi little one” he notices the teary look on the kid, there’s only one explanation he knows “Nightmare?” the child nods “I understand, I used to have a lot of bad dreams before,” particularly after a bad night hunt, like the one with Xue Yang “want to talk about it?”

“There were dogs,” he whispers “they killed mom and dad…” the kid makes a confused face “but they weren’t mom and dad, it was weird, like it was me but not me at the same time” Xingchen makes an understanding sound, dreams are usually nonsensical like that “I was hiding inside a tree trunk and that other mom told me to stay hidden like a good boy, she had white robes like yours” that makes Xingchen surprised but not alarmed... yet “That other father had grey eyes, he left me a Yunmeng Jiang bell like the one uncle Cheng gave me, but then the demon dogs attacked and they died”

“I’m sorry you had such a scary dream… you came to talk to your uncle about it?” Xingchen puts his hand softly on the boy's soft hair

“I dream with uncle sometimes… but in a different way, like if I’m him… is scary but sometimes it helps to come here and see him, like, back home I go to the shrine just to see Suibian, it calms me down”

“Oh, you know Suibian?” Xingchen smiles with fondness, the kid nods excitedly

“It’s going to be mine when I grow up!” he exclaims

“Oh?” Xingchen is confused for a second, as he remembers the rumors saying that the sword is sealed now that his master is dead

“Suibian likes me!” the kid chirps “I can unsheathe it”

“Oh…” he pauses for a second as a revelation occurs to him ‘Could it be?’ he wonders “Is that right second young master Jin?”

“Uncle Xingchen should call me A-Ying as well!” the kid chirps, making the cultivator’s heart hurt a little with warmth and sadness.

If his assumption is correct, the kid could be his nephew’s reincarnation, is really rare to hear stories about people remembering their past lives, the only cases he has heard are of people who didn’t get to fulfilled their wishes in life but weren’t filled with enough resentment to keep them in this plane and bring them back as walking corpses or fierce ghosts, either 

“Alright, A-Ying” the kid beams, making his heart clutch again. For the first time, he feels real grief for his Shijie and her family that's in front of their ancestral tablets, something he never had the opportunity to meet

“A-Ying” the voice of Jiang Yanli sounds at the door “What are you doing here honey? It’s bedtime” the kid jumps to his feet and runs to his mother, hugging her tightly

“Had a bad dream” he says, the young madam gives him a sad smile as she returns the hug

“It’s fine baby, let’s go to bed alright? I’ll prepare you a tea” she gives a slightly suspicious look to Xingchen before bowing and taking her kid with him, leaving the cultivator to his own thoughts, he goes to sleep a few hours later, wondering if his musings could be true

The next day, as he and Song Lan are saying their goodbye, the latter hilariously trying to shrug off two over-excited children, the young Madam Jin walks to Xingchen, a very soft tremble in her hands, yet pure fire in her eyes

“Xingchen, I trust you won't tell anyone what A-Ying told you” Lady Jiang half begs, half demands him “If people know that he is... that he's A-Xian’s... I don’t know what they could do” she whispers as if she can't take the idea of losing his soul once more... she certainly can't

“Of course, Yanli, don’t worry, A-Ying’s secret is safe with me” Xiao Xingchen gives her his word, and how could he do anything else? the kid is his final connection to a home he can never go back to now, he'll do everything to protect him and his family

Jiang Yanli bows at him in relief and gratitude, giving her last farewells to the couple of rogue cultivators before they exit Lotus Pier

Xiao Xingchen smiles at the family as he and Song Lan take their leave, he has an important letter to write

Chapter Text

Year 11

‘This is a maze’ Jin Ying huffs in annoyance as he tries to find the training grounds where his brother is practicing in the Qinghe Nie fortress.

After so much complaining, and whining, he was able to convince his father and uncles to let him come to the discussion conference… though not so much luck in talking them into competing, but! At least he gets to see the scary yet cool Nie Mingjue with his equally scary and cool Baxia, which is a good opportunity since his family doesn’t normally let him near them (sabers are dangerous after all)

While it seemed like a good idea at the moment, is not like he wants to spend so much time around the scary Sect Leader, he and his saber (and pretty much the entirety of Qinghe Nie disciples) have something that puts him on edge, makes him fidgety, something that calls him at the same time that terrorizes him. It's the same thing that happens whenever he hears a flute: longing and fear fight inside him. The sabers, Jin Ying has noticed, have some sort of dark energy that evoke these weird feelings inside him, though he doesn’t know why. It kind of reminds him of his nightmares, the worst ones, the ones with the man with a black flute that raises the dead among the darkness

He suppresses a shiver, yeah, so maybe coming to Qinghe was a bad idea… he just… he is tired of being coddled and kept inside koi tower, he also wants to see all the fun things his brother does and go to all the places his father and brother go. Jin Ying sighs, even his reasons sound childish now when he is contemplating his life choices lost in some part of the Nie Sect, it's not that- he knows his family loves him, it's just... so unfair that he is the only one that's locked away in Koi Tower when his brother gets to be in the front row of everything. He sighs again

Jin Ying is about to give up on his search and send a butterfly talisman to his brother when the beautiful chirp of a bird distracts him, he is curious since he doesn’t recognize the animal. The bird chirps a few more times in his direction and starts flying

“Huh? You want me… to follow you?” the question is rhetoric, of course, he doesn’t expect the wild animal to answer, but then, the bird flies toward him and stands on his shoulder. This is the most excited A-Ying has been ever since he shot the five arrows at a moving target and Zhan-gege himself came out of his reclusive meditation in Cloud Recess for his birthday, just to praise him about his feat and to give him all sorts of gifts (Jin Ling is still pouting about it and since then has made more dumb new rules against courting his little brother). The kid tries so hard not to fidget because a cute, tiny bird landed on his shoulder. It's like he is the chosen one! Of course, it's the moment he has that thought that the animal chirps and starts flying “Hey! Wait!” Jin Ying follows the sparrow to a beautiful hidden garden. There’re precious flowers blooming in every corner, a small river running through and into the forest behind, birds flying and singing all over the place, and a gorgeous pavilion standing in the middle 

“Oh! It seems my little Rose brought me something new today” there’s a man in the pavilion, seated in front of a table made of polished stone with many, many lovely flowers surrounding it. Quite a lot of magpies fly one way or another, never leaving that mystical scenery and just chirping cute sounds

Jin Ying is not afraid, he knows that man

“Uncle Nie!” he beams as he runs to the second young master of the sect, the kid is obviously excited to see him again. Nie Huaisang has always been one of his favorites uncles because of his knowledge of the refined arts, his collection of interesting birds and lovely fans, and also, because he is really pretty, almost as much as uncle Yu

“Well, well, well if it isn’t my cute A-Ying” Nie Huaisang hugs the preteen and ruffles his hair despite the indignant yelp “Here, here, have a seat” the kid sits in front of him and blushes slightly at the elegant way uncle Nie serves him tea as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Jin Ying barely started his etiquette studies a few months ago, so he respectfully waits for his uncle Nie to drink from his tea before he even takes the cup “So? How is it?”

“It’s very delicious, thank you!” he smiles brightly

“I’m glad, I’m glad” Nie Huaisang gives the child an innocent-looking smile “Soooo, Xiao-Ying tell me everything that’s been happening in Koi Tower”

“Huh? Why would I do that? Uncle Nie, aren’t you forgetting something?” he returns with an equally angelic grin

“Ah, yes, yes, you are absolutely right” he giggles, ‘Ah, kids these days grow so fast…'  he almost tears up a little, feeling oddly proud ' A-Ying, I’ve taught you well ’ “here” he hands the kid a scroll and a package of cookies, the ones he somehow knows that the second Jade likes ('Thank you Xichen-ge for the insider info' Xichen is Huaisang’s favorite Lan ever because he is so easy to play to his whims)

Jin Ying opens the scroll to see a drawing of Lan Wangji while he plays the guqin, the kid blushes because really, Zhan-gege is still the prettiest person he’s ever met (and he’s met Xiao Xingchen and Lan Xichen), but something about it makes him feel nostalgic, like there’s something missing or something is not quite right ‘He should be reading a book’ he thinks ‘and there should be a flower on his head… a peony? Or was it a lotus? What was it?’ he doesn’t know where he gets the certainty of his thoughts, but there’s an itch on his little fingers to try and replicate the drawing he is seeing in his mind, and sure, his painting skills are still a work in progress (“Bullshit”, his brother would say, “You drew a perfect portrait of uncle Yu just the other day!” he would argue) but… there’s something very much resembling as a need hovering inside him, something telling him he has to draw Zhan-gege exactly the way he remembers- wait, remembers? He has never tried to draw Zhan-gege, he has yet to polish his art and make sure it’s perfect before trying something so daring, so why-

“Is something wrong A-Ying?” Huaisang’s voice takes him out of his weird thoughts. He's been having them more often lately, weird thoughts that are familiar but not entirely, just like the nightmares. Both of them make him wonder

“No, it’s perfect, thank you Uncle Nie” even if the drawing is not as he imagined, it's still a perfect portrait of his future husband (Zhan-gege will be his future husband, he already decided that since the man smiled at him for the first time at the conference all those years ago, Jin Ying will court him once his of age even if his father, uncles, and A-Ling try to stop him) “So! What do you want to know?”

“Oh A-Ying you injure me” Huaisang dramatically flaunts “You make it sound as if I want to know something instead of merely curiously wondering about the state of Koi Tower and my brother’s sworn brother,” the kid giggles, uncle Huaisang’s always funny like that “wondering after an audience that my own brother attended alongside Sect Leader Jin and my brother’s own sworn brother can’t be that bad, right? So?” he asks propping his chin on his palm “What happened after the hearing?” he decides to ask first what he had been trying to make his Da-ge confess for the past month

“Uh, well I saw Sect Leader Nie nod approvingly and I heard him say that he was proud of uncle Yao, oh! And he also patted his head!” he says excitedly “Uncle Yao was really happy that day, uhm how do I say this… he looked less stressed and patted our heads thrice!”

Nie Huaisang nods understanding; two years after Jin Guangshan’s death, after most of the initial chaos was solved, the then-still Jin Guangyao talked to his brother about what was bothering Nie Mingjue the most: the murder of his Jin officer back in the sunshot campaign. This was a miracle brought thanks to the insistence of Jin Ying and Jin Ling that having sworn brothers was so cool, and why didn’t he see his more often? and why if Nie Mingjue was his sworn brother he was so distant? and why-. There were a lot of questions and Jin Guangyao could snake his way out of adult conversations, but he couldn’t avoid the Twin Terrors that easily (even less when they looked at him with that fully trusting, innocent, and pure eyes of theirs), so, with the help of Xichen and Huaisang, he talked to his Da-ge about reconciliation and the sect leader put the conditions. Because Guangyao listened to him on the matter of Xue Yang (Meng Yao had actually tried to save the demonic cultivator as per his father's request but couldn’t, thanks to Jin Zixuan… not that the Nie leader needed to know that insignificant detail), Mingjue only wanted him to be honest about what he did in the past, so, with no little fear he went and talked to his older brother about it

And Jin Zixuan had actually been very understanding about it, Guangyao still got whipped with the disciplinary whip once (because treason and murder) and had to pay the family of that officer reparations for all the time he had kept it a secret (meaning ever since the sunshot campaign, which actually meant a little fortune that was paid with his personal savings) but the matter was treated efficiently, personally and quietly. There was no humiliation nor expulsion from the sect, no being thrown off the stairs nor anything of the things he was deeply afraid of, and the knowledge of his crime stayed between Jin Zixuan, Jiang Yanli, and the Jin elder that took out his punishment (who was also sworn by a talisman to secrecy), so no nasty rumors followed the fallout

Several years later and a month before the discussion conference, the now Jin Ziyao had finally paid everything to the family, which was why Mingjue had gone to the hearing, and while Jin Ying didn’t know about the full context Nie Huaisang had totally enlisted him in the mission: ‘make Mingjue and Ziyao friends again’. The plan was originally his and Xichen’s, but after the first time the brat had blackmailed him in order to get drawings from the second jade, the younger Nie realized just how formidable as an ally A-Ying would be (and he wasn’t wrong, the kid had modified the signature Jin butterflies to make spy-talismans somehow, now the entire Koi Tower was in the palm of his tiny hand and they weren’t even aware of that! Huaisang was so proud), and also, he just might’ve missed his friend

“I see, I see” the spymaster of Qinghe nods pleased “Things have also been good around here, Da-ge does look more relaxed and happy now that he gets to talk to San-ge” he takes a sip from his tea “Does Xichen-ge go to Lanling often?” he inquires curiously 

Jin Ying blinks confusedly at the abrupt change of subject and then huffs, annoyed

“Not nearly enough as he should” he complains loudly, Huaisang can’t help but notice a very eerie resemblance of both Jiang Cheng and Jin Zixuan in the kid’s pout, and is adorable “He is supposed to come often to bring me letters from Zhan-gege, dad's rules and all.... It’s because of him that Zhan-gege’s presents take so long to arrive” he mutters grumpily and the second young master Nie has to make an effort not to laugh

“Truly unacceptable” he concedes while giggling internally, “I thought he would’ve been present during Yao-ge’s hearing? He was very supportive of the watch towers after all and he seems to appreciate him a great deal” Jin Ying makes a face, uncle Yao had totally used his brilliant idea to teach and test both kids on sect politics, and father had been so impressed with it that the young masters had gained yet another class in their busy schedule (Mianmian had laughed and said that it totally was punishment for the last round of pranks around the tower… she was probably right)

“Father was even more supportive!” Jin Ying feels a need to defend his family that he would never admit to them “He was really proud of uncle Yao, you know?” the kid takes a sip of his tea, with all the regal elegance of a Jin and Huaisang has to stifle another laugh “Anyway, so, Sect Leader Lan doesn’t come nearly as often as he should to deliver Zhan-gege’s letters, actually, it’s more usual if I find him in Lotus Pier with jiujiu” the kid scowls

“Ho~” Huaisang flutters his new fan, hiding a grin at this new piece of information, while he has knowledge that the two sect leaders have been meeting to brainstorm a method to destroy the Stygian Tiger Seal, it’s still interesting to know that Xichen-ge is so diligent in his work “Is that right?” the young master Nie pushes the candy he got closer to the kid, who narrows his eyes, Yao-shushu warned him about oversharing with other people and he has an accurate instinct to cut the information link there, one painting and courting gift can only give second young master Nie so much access to Jin Ying’s privy fountain of gossip after all. Nie Huaisang understands the kid’s look and decides to stop trying to dig for details “Let’s finish this and get back to your parents, so tell me how your studies are going?”

As the kid tells him all about his new classes and the talismans he has been working on, Huaisang lets a fond and indulgent smile rest on his face

‘Ah, I missed this, I missed you Wei-Xiong’

Nie Huaisang is normally quite updated on the latest’s gossip and has a very vast knowledge of the situation of any and all the rumors that surround the cultivation world, especially ever since his best friend died because of that kind of misinformation

If only he had taken more care in acquiring evidence to dispel what he knew were false truths… but back then he had his own sect to help recover from the war, and his brother’s mood and health were so much worse somehow, that everything else fell in second place. He paid for that mistake with the life of one of the best men he has known

Nie Huaisang is a deeply intelligent person, he knows that what happened was not his fault and he could’ve done little to avoid it, still, the guilt that sometimes chokes him in the middle of the day when he sees something that his friend would’ve like or at night when he wants to enjoy a cup of wine and is immediately reminded of silver eyes shining is too strong sometimes; no matter how much he tried clearing it by redeeming Wei Wuxian’s name supporting Jin Zixuan and Madame Jin’s plans in the following years, the remorse won't fade 

So when the first rumors surrounding the second son of the Jin clan arrived to Qinghe, Nie Huaisang cried.

He cried for his friend, for his soul. He cried with relief, with grief (again), and also with fear. If people like Jin Guangshan, Sect Leader Yao, or Sect Leader Ouyang were to know about it… he didn’t want to think what they would do to his friend’s soul again, especially in his new, vulnerable state! Fortunately for him, people can be cruel but they're also stupid, so, as the spymaster he is, he made a plan

It still makes him laugh, how even 9 years later, Jiang-Xiong and Jin-Xiong are so convinced that it was their threats to the staff the thing that stopped the rumors from spreading. Please, his work consists of both creating and spreading rumors… and also refuting and suppressing them. He is the spymaster of the cultivation world after all, it's his job to control the information that moves around the cultivation world (he has to do it properly for once)

That night, Nie Huiasang is drawing on a new fan to give as a gift to his two favorite nephews when he hears it, a sound like faint sobs that comes from the guest's rooms, cautiously, he leaves his room through the servant’s corridors to the place from where he can hear the cries, it takes him right to the room of the Jin heirs. He doesn’t peek inside, just listens outside in case any of them needs help

“It’s alright A-Ying, you are alright” Jin Ling soothes the younger kid

“Ge-gege!” Jin Ying sobs “the darkness!” he chokes a desperate sob “It’s here! It’s coming closer! It’s calling me”

“The darkness again? You haven’t had those in months… but don’t worry! It can’t hurt you A-Ying, it can’t hurt you because I’m here! I’ll protect you!” Nie Huaisang can feel his heart break hearing the level of fear in the youngsters, he has half a mind to send a butterfly to the Jin Sect leaders, their rooms are close but the kids are too quiet for them to hear them; even the second young master Nie only heard them thanks to a secondary trauma of hypervigilance during the sunshot campaign 

“Gege!” the preteen sniffles as he hugs his older brother, it doesn’t matter how old is he, his nightmares are still the total worst “that man, he was playing the flute, and, and- the corpses, there were a lot, and, and- the darkness, black energy! It’s so gross A-Ling!” the kid cries and Nie Huaisang stops, is he… Are Wei-xiong’s memories bleeding through Jin Ying’s dreams? That’s-

“A-Ying, A-Ling?” the sweet voice of Jiang Yanli sounds through the door, a second later, both Jin Zixuan and young madam Jin enter the room “bad dream?” as the concerned parents coddle their kids, Huaisang takes that as his leaving queue

But later, as he tosses in his bed he wonders about the second young master’s dreams, are they normal? Is there something that triggers them? He thinks of something ‘Dark energy? Darkness? Are those Wei-xiong’s memories… is he talking about… resentful energy?’ going by Jin Rulan’s words, Jin Ying hadn’t had a dream like that in a while, so what could have triggered it? Nie Huaisang has no idea why would he dream something like that, now, here in Qinghe; he goes back to his conversation with the kid and nothing stands out, besides, why would he be reminded of the resentful energy here? It's not like they are near Yiling or the burial mounds or—

‘Wait!’

Nie Huaisang opens his eyes wide in realization, there’s one thing that could’ve triggered it... the very thing that he has been working so hard to try to fix

 ----------

The next day, the final day of the Discussion Conference, Nie Huaisang takes upon himself to be the designated nanny for the day. Meaning that he has to take care of Second young master Jin as the leaders and first disciples of the sects gather to talk about useless politics and whatever the new price of grain and silk will be. ‘So dull… Oh well, it’s more time for the sworn brothers and Jiang-xiong to bat their eyes at each other’ he giggles as he paints his fan.

Next to him, Jin Ying is painting a beautiful lake with cranes and lotuses

“Hmmm? Is that Lotus Pier?” he looks at the painting, it looks just a bit… off but Huaisang can’t really pinpoint why

“Yes!” the kid beams, he looks really cute despite the faint bags below his eyes “But it’s weird... when I dream about Lotus Pier is a bit different than how is it...” the kid dips his paintbrush in the ink and continues while he thinks how to explain it “The buildings are different” he concludes

“Ah, I see” with the newfound information about his dreams and nightmares he can guess that what Jin Ying is actually seeing, is Wei Wuxian’s Lotus Pier, the one before the massacre. The detail makes the painting look a little bit more heartbreaking “It’s still a beautiful painting” A-Ying preens at the compliment “Do you have a lot of dreams?”

“A little bit,” he admits absentmindedly “most of them I don’t remember, but some are so vivid… I used to have a lot of nightmares” he frowns, with the help of his Jiang bell and some relaxing tea from Qing-jie, his nightmares have been decreasing the last few years, but every now and then one would bleed through, just like the one he had last night

“Does A-Ying want to talk about it?” Nie Huaisang wonders as he passes more snacks and tea to the kid, he thanks his uncle and thinks about it, Mom told him to not reveal his nightmares to other people for some reason that she says she will explain to him when he grows up, and he trust his mom more than anyone else in this world (other than his brother)… but he can talk about them just a little, right? It will be good to have another perspective, right???!!!

“Mmm it’s no big deal,” he says nonchalantly trying to look like a grown-up “it’s just a lot of darkness and corpses”

“Darkness? Corpses? Sounds like resentful energy” Nie Huaisang flutters his fan in front of him innocently “Scary, scary” there’s a moment when an idea hits him, it appears like a flash, but it’s an interesting theory, there’s no harm on follow it and it even may help the kid on the long run, though just in case… ‘I’m sorry Wei-xiong, I’m counting on you’ “It sounds like Qinghe’s ancient tomb legend”

“Qinghe’s tomb legend? What’s that?” of course a curious soul like a-Ying would want to know, Nie Huaisang weeps inwardly 

“Oh, it’s just an old legend, they say the sabers that were wielded by our ancestors used to absorb the resentful energy of their prey, and that the voices of the restless spirits can still be heard in the ancient tomb, it’s just a legend of course… but could you imagine how scary would it be if something like that really happened?” which is close enough to admit the current resentful level of Baxia and the imminent danger of his brother falling into Qi deviation ('Thank you Xichen-ge for cleansing Da-ge all the time until now ')

“If something like that happened… aren’t you cultivators? Why not just cleanse the place?” Jin Ying deadpans with a very judgmental eyebrow for an eleven-year-old; the kid is currently learning about purification methods, so of course that’s the most logical answer he can think of

“No way! If the legends were true, that would mean that there’s resentful energy accumulated for centuries, it would probably not be only just energy now” Huaisang wails dramatically, taking a giggle out of the young master 

Jin Ying thinks about it for a moment, there’s something about those words that resonate with his nightmares, the ones with the man and mountain of corpses

“Like the darkness?” he wonders

“Is it different?” the younger Nie tilts his head curiously 

“It is! Somewhat...” Jin Ying has seen a little bit of resentful energy, mainly the few times he has encountered fierce corpses and a few yaos (because he keeps trying to sneak into his older brother’s hunts and Wen Ning keeps saving him), but mostly the nasty aura is pretty diluted, its not concentrated enough… not like in his dreams. If he thinks about it, in his nightmares there’s definitely resentful energy but that’s not all, there’s more to it, whatever it is (dark spirits, ghosts, demons), resentment or whatever, it makes the energy so much denser it looks like solid pitch black darkness; he doesn’t know how to explain that to the Nie heir, though “The darkness is a hundred times worst! And it speaks!”

“It speaks?”

“Yeah! It screams and it's bad!” the kid exclaims getting worked up

“Waah scary, scary, so scary!” Huaisang shakes his head “but A-Ying is right, then it would be more like the darkness you dream about, no wonder our ancestors sealed the tomb and hid it away” he sighs dramatically

“Hmm? They sealed it?” 'Well, that's rather anti-climatic...'

“Yes, according to the legend, the resentful energy was so strong no one could cleanse it so they sealed it and hid it to never be seen again, I don’t even know where it is and I’m the heir…” and that’s not even a lie, his brother told him that the secret would be revealed to him until he learned to use his saber

Practice saber and a scary secret full of resentful sabers and fierce corpses? No thanks

“The legends never said where it was?” another head shake

“Not at all, that’s why is a legend, although it does say that the voices of the resentful beings trapped in the sabers can still be heard till this very day, what do you think? Scary, right?!” Huasiang can see the kid deeply thinking about something and he decides to go for it “What do you think, A-Ying? What would you do?

“Huh? Me?” the kid tilts his head and he looks so adorable with his still chubby cheeks and eyes that look slightly silver in the right light, that Nie Huaisang has to make an effort to not pinch him “If I had been near the tomb, I would make the voices go somewhere else”

“What?” 

“You know, like, I would do a talisman or a pendant to absorb that… that thing, the darkness, whatever it is” the kid makes an annoyed huff as he grimaces, Nie Huaisang commiserates him, so young and still dealing with so much “If the dark energy could go from the sabers and be contained in a smaller space, that should be easier to purify right?” he asks remembering his recent classes about purification of resentful things. The second young master sighs

“I don’t think I would be that simpl-” except, what if it was? Nie Huaisang turns to look at this innocent-looking young master that is the reincarnation of the Yiling Patriarch, his late best friend, and follows his instinct “Hypothetically speaking… how would you do it?”

Jin Ying frowns, aren’t the adults supposed to be the smart ones? why is young master Nie asking this? Also, they are still talking about a stupid legend, right? It kind of feels like tedious homework but he still answers dutifully, because his mother raised him to answer any question politely, even the dumb ones

“Well… I think… like, if you have a tuned metal or crystal or stone, one that has an affinity with resentful energy, especially one that resembles the object they are in… if you carved one of those luring symbols we saw in class the other day on the object it should absorb whatever bad energy the saber has right? Then that object can be purified, see? Of course, it should be doing little amounts each time, so that it doesn’t become more darkness” the kid barely keeps himself from rolling his eyes through sheer politeness, his mom wouldn’t be happy with him otherwise and mom should always be happy

Nie Huaisang stares dumbly at the young master, he says that simply as he hasn’t given him an idea on how to get rid of a centuries-old problem. It’s not as easy as the kid thinks, of course, he still has a lot to learn and experience, but the foundation is there, along with an innocent understanding/sympathy of resentful energy ‘Is that how your Stygian Tiger Seal worked? Not only releasing but absorbing it as well? that would actually make some things make a lot of sense’  

“Ah… second young master Jin is super smart” he takes a sip from his tea to reorganize his thoughts as fast as he can “It does sound like a good solution, A-Ying, in case I ever have to be in charge of that horrible tomb then I know what to do!” ‘and thanks to your ideas, that is never going to happen, thank you so much, Wei-Xiong, I promise I’ll repay you every time I can, I owe you, A-Ying’ “Thank you for helping me with this problem”

Jin Ying looks at the young master and blinks twice

“Ah! Uncle Nie! You just wanted me to help you with your homework!” the kid snaps in indignation

“Don’t worry about the little details A-Ying” Huaisang just smiles innocently and flutters his fan as he takes another out of his robes “Here, have this lovely new fan I made just for you”

Jin Ying pouts adorably but ultimately accepts the present and can’t stop himself from beaming when he opens it, admiring the beautiful scenery

“Fine! But only this time!” he sulks half-heartedly “So! Where did you get this?”

Second young master Nie smiles satisfactorily and fondly. His mind starts to make plans, as soon as the discussion conference ends, he has to talk to the blacksmith of the Nie sect, and he will have to spend a lot of time in the sect’s library; maybe he could even pay Xichen-ge a visit, Wei Wuxian’s attraction flag is well-known, so he only has to research types of metals that can be used as a conduit for resentful energy ‘It would be so much easier with your help Wei-xiong, but you already helped me with enough with your inadvertent knowledge’, while he keeps his research he also needs to stall his brother’s deviation… ‘oh right…’ there’s a few rumors that contain the information of healer Qing making rounds in Yunmeng; he smiles, seems like the perfect time to collect some favors from Jiang-xiong. 'Maybe when the talisman is ready, it could even help A-Ying, if the nightmares are so bad they may leave traces of resentful emotions, this could help...' Huaisang truly hopes it

As his mind works in every direction, he keeps telling his dear nephew A-Ying all about the fan he just gave him and others from his collection

‘Ah, Wei-xiong, I miss our art discussions’ he thinks fondly as the kid tells him all about the beautiful things he has seen in Langling and Yunmeng ‘It’s so good to have you back, and this time we’ll help you, A-Ying’

Chapter Text

Year 12

‘ Shijie… how do you know if you like a person?... that type of like?’

‘A-Xian has a special someone in mind?’

‘Aiya! How can that be? Xianxian is three!’

….

‘A-Cheng, my position here in Koi Tower is already secure enough, please bring A-Xian home… didn’t you said there were only elderly and a kid there? I’ve been talking things with A-Xuan, he says that he will back us up if you take the Wens as refugees, you talked to Nie Huaisang about this as well, didn’t you? We really can’t leave them live there any longer’

‘I know Jiejie, let’s wait until Wei Wuxian arrives and we can work out a plan, we can-‘

‘A-Li!’

‘A-Xuan! That blood… what happened?!’

‘It’s my fault, they ambushed him and he… Wei Wuxian, he…’

Jiang Yanli startles awake, she wakes up as the worst words she has ever heard in her life repeat over and over again in her nightmares

‘Wei Wuxian is dead!’

The dreadful sentence echoes as her dream vanishes, Jin Zixuan is sleeping soundly next to her, and she has a fleeting moment of envy at his peacefully looking face before shaking those negative thoughts away, her husband has been working too hard lately weeding out the many rotten apples that survived the initial ‘purge’

Yanli sighs exhausted. It’s not the first time nightmares have woken her up; if anything, she should be grateful that she has been having them less lately, so, after taking a deep breath and putting on another robe, she walks quietly to her sons’ bedroom. They’ve been having talks about Jin Ling moving to a bigger room, being the older Lanling heir and all, but the teen has been reluctant, he may say that is wasteful and play wise all he wants but everyone in their family know his true reason: he doesn’t want A-Ying to sleep alone. He doesn’t want his little brother to wake up from a night terror without anyone there for him, even if those are rare these days

Jiang Yanli is proud of her eldest and touched by him being such a good brother, but she also wants him to be a bit more selfish and think about himself. Although… is not like she can talk. She sighs again before entering the room

There. Both siblings are sleeping in the same bed, the older protectively hugging the other, with the jiang bells on their hands just like when they were younger. The matriarch has a spike of concern; it seems like it’s going to be a particularly bad week

Ever since realizing that her late little brother had reincarnated in her second baby, they had realized that his nightmares were the product of his old memories; it wasn’t that hard to figure it out. Somehow, memories flew down from Wei Wuxian to Jin Ying; the first years were particularly bad, to say the least, though honestly, what could they expect from such a broken soul? The thought makes Yanli’s eyes water. Even now, it hurts to know just how much her little brother was hurting with them being none the wiser

The nightmares of dogs and fierce corpses were only the tip of the iceberg. When he turned 9, the dreams about Lotus Pier began. Jiang Yanli still shivers remembering the one time Jin Ying flinched violently when A-Cheng used Zidian in a demonstration, both her brother and her younger son were inconsolable for hours afterward

Yanli looks down and sees Little Fairy in her guarding spot. She smiles as she prepares a protective and calming talisman to attach to the door. At least A-Ying have become better at handling dogs thanks to his determined brother and patient family, he will never get close to one first, but at least he doesn’t freeze in terror at the sight of them anymore, and Fairy has become another one of his best friends in recent years. She giggles silently remembering how desperate cute A-Ying was to cure his fear because not only his gege loved dogs, but his jiujiu as well! He had to impress him too!

(‘What about me A-Ying? I love dogs as well, don’t you want to impress me as well?’ A-Xuan cried, complaining teary-eyed because he was no longer his baby's favorite.)

“-jie” a soft, distressed groan interrupts her fond memories. A-Ying is talking in his sleep. Yanli walks carefully to her sons’ bed, where she can hear the heartbreaking whimpers “-jie, shijie… sorry… A-Xian is sorry”

She has to hold her hand on her mouth to stop the sob that tries to escape. What is A-Ying dreaming about? she wonders for a second; Yanli softly puts her hand on top of her son’s head, his hair is silky just like it was when he was still a toddler, and the frustration, as the pain, keeps on growing. Still, she swallows her emotions for the moment and forces herself to whisper

“It’s alright A-Xian, shijie loves you, go back to rest…” The words feel like she is very much taking her own heart and tearing it apart. They are dedicated to her younger sibling… who died so many years ago, her son can’t be expected to fill that place. She sighs, “Don’t worry A-Ying, A-Niang is here to protect you and your brother, alright? Have a nice dream now, please” she asks her little one, giving him a cute tap on his nose

The action works and A-Ying stops frowning immediately

“Hmm, A-Niang?” the younger calls, still asleep

“Yes baby?” she asks in a quiet voice to avoid waking up any of the boys

“A-Ling ate all the mooncakes again….” He says before falling into deep sleep again. The Jin matriarch gives each of her kids a little peck on the forehead as her own night charm and silently goes back to her room, where she finally breaks down

~~~~~~~~~~~~

When A-Ying wakes up that morning, he doesn’t feel good. He hasn’t felt great for the whole week, but that day in particular, he feels… off, his skin is itching, and his limbs are twitching, as if he could go run a whole lap or two around the tower

In the early hours of dawn he had woken up with a pounding heart, a quiet scream, and a throbbing heart; for once, he didn’t remember whatever nightmare his mind had come up with, and he is insanely grateful for that since he has the feeling he really, really never wants to know... Still, he can’t shake off the ominous sense that somehow, something will go wrong

And it is quite noticeable how distracted he is during his training, especially when he is beaten twice by his sparring partners and the instructor tells him off three times for mixing up Jin and Jiang forms. Granted, he is the Jiang heir and he should dominate the Jiang sword style, but being the second young master Jin everyone expects him to be proficient in both fighting styles, so he can’t be caught doing something like mixing them up to make them easier to remember...

Like, it's not like he wants to create a third style, what would be next? Creating a sect in Yiling?... ‘ "Don’t even joke about that, Jiang Cheng!" ’ The thought is oddly specific and so strangely familiar, even if his whole being rejects the idea

“A-Ying!” The shout gets to his brain too late, and his sparring partner attacks him with a bit too much force. The preteen feels the wooden sword hitting his ribs with a stinging sensation before throwing him to the side

‘Great…’ he thinks gloomily and bitterly as the pain irradiates from his side

“Sorry, young master! I thought you would block it!” the other kid panics a little seeing the heir on the grass

“Jin Ying! By Guayin, what are you doing spacing out like that?!” the instructor frowns concerned. If the precious son of the sect leader gets overly hurt on his watch, he doesn’t know what his protective relatives could do to him

“My fault, sorry” A-Ying snaps out of his mind for a moment. He thought that maybe practicing sword fighting would help him to get rid of the awful feeling, but now he is not sure that it didn’t make it worse.

“I don’t know what is going on with you, but you need to get it together, kid.” The instructor turns to the one who yelled before, “You! Mianmian! Change partners with him, take care of Jin Ying for a second”

“I can still—”

“Don’t force yourself kid, let your core heal you for a minute, then you can start the training again” the older man orders before going back and barking the rest to keep going. A-Ying sighs

It’s not the first time he practices with the rest of the disciples, but most of them don’t trust him or his brother a lot because they are the heirs and because of the multiple amount of pranks they have made over the years; Jin Ying does not regret any of them, all of those disciples deserved it. Normally, the tradition is that the Jin heirs have their own team of private instructors, and because of Madame Jin’s insistence that her grandchildren had to have the very best of the best that stayed true for a while, but thanks to their mother, they started to train more and more with other disciples their age, it’s not bad but… he misses his brother a lot

“A-Ying, are you alright?” Mianmian asks him worried, her little hand stretched to help him

He smiles, a warm feeling filling his mind and heart ‘At least I know I can always count on her’, even if his gege is busy with sect training and they can’t be playing together as they used to, at least he has his mei mei

After training ends, he feels a little bit better, at least he definitely burned out all the restless energy he was feeling all morning, meaning he is so ready to eat whatever banquet his dear mother prepared for them

Occasionally, Jiang Yanli may allow the servants to cook for her family on social events where the situation requires it, but she always makes an effort to cook for them herself. This time is no different, Jin Ying notices, as he arrives at the gazebo where his family is reunited for lunch

“Gege!” he excitedly squeals, running to his big brother, whom he immediately starts roughhousing with. They still hug and cuddle each other, but to do so in front of others is embarrassing

“A-Ying! You little—!” Jin Ling shows no mercy to his baby sibling despite being taller than him

“Kids, kids, stop!” Jin Zixuan tries to calm them down, but to no avail, both teens teasing and picking on each other as their laughter sounds all over the garden

“I don’t think they are listening to you, da ge.” Jin Ziyu giggles while serving the tea on the table

“Oh, they are already at that age, it seems.” Jin Ziyao also joins in bullying his elder brother

“You guys are not helping,” Zixuan grumbles. Behind him, there is a yelp from one of the kids followed by a gasp. “Knock it off, you two!” he turns to his sons, seemingly fed up with their disregard of his orders, but also concerned about them, he doesn't want them to hurt each other, not even accidentally 

“Kids, listen to your father.” The soft voice laced in laughter from Jiang Yanli reaches them as both Madames Jin make their appearance

“Yes, Mom.” The teens immediately stop fighting and rush to help the ladies carry the rest of the food to the table

After a sigh from the Jin sect leader and a couple of more discreet laughs from his half brothers, everyone takes their place around the table. Jin Ying takes his place next to the Jin heir, elbowing in comraderie as he receives the bowl of food from his mother, he looks down at the soup 'Was it always this red?' he wonders if it's a trick from the light as his laughter dies in his throat; slowly, a shadow begins to form inside Jin Ying’s mind, the anxiety and fear from the morning come back with a vengeance for some reason, even the sun stops feeling warm and a cold sensation climbs through his back, its enough to freeze him for a second ‘What is this feeling? What is—?’

“A-Ying?” his brother calls to him, breaking through the mist of his spiralling thoughts, his eyes focus back and sees that he stopped mid bite, letting the rice spill back into the plate as his eyes fixated on the now clear liquid in front of him. “Are you alright?” Jin Ling asks, whispering to keep it between them as the rest of the adults start talking about politics and the new cost of the grain and silk

“Y-yes.” Jin Ying's voice trembles a little for reasons that he does not identify; he just has the feeling that he needs to go soon. ‘Stop being so childish!’ a voice similar to his instructor's and… someone else, someone harsher, reprimands him inside his brain

He tries to breathe deeply and remember some of Qing-jie’s relaxing exercises; he concentrates on the birds around him, the chatter of his family, on everything except the growing unease inside him. He is almost in a meditative state when a piece of meat from the pork rib soup finds a way into his mouth

The moment his teeth touch the soft tissue, his mind remembers. He is no longer in the garden in Jin Tower with his family, instead, he is inside the Burial Mounds, being suffocated by the resentful energy, without core, injured and mangled, without water or food; he is back in the hell from which he crawled out, back again, reduced to drink water filled with poison and blood, having to drag himself from place to place with his broken bones and bleeding back, barely able to breathe through the miasma of the wasteland, fighting every day to avoid being killed by the rotten walking corpses and demonic spirits, resorting to eat- to eat- to eat—

“Jin Ying!” The bloodied, rotting piece of corpse flesh disappears from his hands; instead, he can see the worried faces of his father and relatives a bit further. When the meat had brought back the memories of the flashback nightmare, he had jumped from his seat and crawled almost to the edge of the gazebo in desperation, breathing quickly and shallow, he was almost about to pass out when Jin Zixuan took him by the shoulders, calling to him. The kid has a terrifying haunted look, and that, more than anything, scares Jin Zixuan. He doesn’t know what to do for his son; how can he make this better? “Breathe A-Ying! You are safe,” he tries again, softer when he sees the teen blink in recognition 

“I—” whatever Jin Ying is about to say is interrupted by a sudden rush of nausea, his whole body rejecting the idea of eating… that thing, that meat, that… corpse Whatever it was. He turns around and runs to throw up into some plants, his heart beating a mile per hour and his head throbbing with each beat. In automatic, he gives a half-bow to his family and practically runs to his bedroom

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The family discusses it for a long time, but in the end, Yanli makes the decision to be the one who goes to check on their youngest while Zixuan talks to Jin Ling

“A-Ying… It’s me… can I come in?” She softly knocks on the door, waits until she hears a soft hum, and opens the door. Inside the room, she can see her son tightly under his covers. “A-Ying… are you alright?” the soft voice of Jiang Yanli sounds in the otherwise quiet room, there’s a moment of heavy silence, filled with all the thoughts the teen has accumulated over the years. A broken sob finally shatters the silence. “Oh my baby, come here”

Jin Ying practically melts inside his mother’s arms, in a way he hadn’t have since he was seven years old; the woman doesn’t make him the disservice of asking what is wrong, she just holds him firmly, as if she could ward him from all the bad and evil things in the world

“A-Niang… what’s wrong with me?” The despair in the young eyes just about breaks her heart

“A-Ying, there’s nothing wrong with you, there’s not—”

“Don’t lie to me!” he snaps, flinching at the sound of his own voice. “Just… please… don’t lie, A-Niang, please.”

Jiang Yanli snuggles him closer, barely containing her tears. How many times have they tried to avoid the past? How many times did they look away from the injuries that somehow are still there? Is she ever going to move on from her brother’s death? If she hadn’t invited him back then… if she had gone to him instead… If only she had stood with him… but the past is the past, and she can only support her dear son now. She takes him firmly by the shoulder with one hand and raises his face to see her with the other. Two similar sets of eyes encounter

“Listen to me Jin Ying, there is nothing wrong with you, to hear me?” Her pale sight finds the slight slash of silver in her son’s watery eyes

“Then why…” he doesn’t have the energy to continue, but he doesn’t need to… ‘why the nightmares? Why do I keep seeing things that aren’t there? Why are those images in my mind?’

Yanli sighs. It’s not like they want to hide what happened from the kid forever, not that they could anyway, but she is not sure where to start

“You remember when I told you about your uncle? Wei Wuxian?” She moves her hands from the kid’s shoulder to his head, untying his headpiece delicately and combing his silky hair with her hands, just like she used to do when he was a toddler

“Your little brother?” The kid is too exhausted and barely starts relaxing under his mother’s touch. “The one who died?”

Yanli forces herself not to flinch at the words, it's very hard to do when the wound is still there, just waiting to be acknowledged to start bleeding again

“Yes, that same one, he is— was, very dear to me, we grew together with your uncle A-Cheng” she thinks about what to say, but since it’s the same soul, she figures anything she reveals, he probably already saw it in his dreams “He… saved your father when A-Ling was a baby, and lost his life because of it”

“To save A-Die…?” the kid gasps. There were rumors about the one that everyone called the Yiling Patriarch, but nothing was said about his death or that he saved his father; it’s the first time he has heard anything like it. With trembling hands, he holds his mother’s tunic and repeats the question he once made to Wen Qing, “Wei Wuxian… Who was he?”

“He was my little brother, taken in by my father, your grandfather. Back then things were very difficult since my parents didn’t quite get along with a lot of things and my mother, your grandmother didn’t like him very much, she was way more strict with him than us…” the kid tenses under her arms, probably remembering some undesired dream “Even so we were very close with each other; when Wen Ruohan attacked we were split up, mother sent me away to keep safe, so I don’t know a lot of what happened with my brothers during that time but when I saw him after the fall of Lotus Pier he was different, he was… using what we know as demonic cultivation”

“The darkness!” Jin Ying exclaims under his breath, Yanli's hands stop combing the soft hair for an instant

“Is that what you have seen in your nightmares?” she asks softly, there’s a moment when the kid stays still, a chill runs all the way down his spine and suddenly he is not so sure he wants the answers he had wanted ever since he was little, yet he still nods “I see… it is true though, the resentful energy or yin energy is dark, it affects all living things causing negative effects to all of them who comes in contact with it”

“But why, why me? I haven’t done anything!” the kid raises his voice in despair, looking at his mother with terror and tears in his eyes. “I’ve never touched Yin energy, so how—?”

“That’s because...” Jiang Yanli doesn’t know how to explain it; she knows there have been numerous rumors around the issue for years, and it would be naïve to expect her children to be free from them, especially in Koi Tower; still, knowing the whispers is different than having the cold confirmation

“Is it my fault? Did I do something somehow?”

“Look at me, A-Ying, it's not your fault, alright?” She bites her lip in an attempt to soothe her nerves. “This is a theory, but it’s what we believe, okay? We think that when A-Xian died, his soul couldn’t get the peace he wanted and somehow skipped the reincarnation process before returning to us.”

“Returning?” the kid echoes with huge eyes that only make the similarities more obvious

“Yes, my love,” she nods  “we think A-Xian came back to us… as you”  

“I… I don’t understand” ‘suddenly I don’t want to understand’ his mind repeats in a loop

“You’ve heard how you unleashed Subian when you were a baby, right?” there is a tiny nod, under the shadows many servants and sect disciples have say it, that maybe he is the successor of the demon known as the Yiling Patriarch, or even that he was possessed by the ‘evil’ spirit when he was born, but that’s impossible, right? Yanli seems to read the kid’s thoughts when she answers, “Your father, your uncles, and I, we were never really sure, but there is a fact that Subian sealed itself after A-Xian’s death… Only two people have unsealed it, you and A-Cheng, and he is a special case.”

“Special case?” Something about the way she says it resonates deep within him. If he remembers correctly, doesn’t he have a recurrent nightmare with his jiujiu? His hand goes directly to his lower dantian

“A-Cheng has A-Xian’s golden core,” that small confirmation on one of his deepest nightmares, “And you… You are probably A-Xian’s… my little brother’s reincarnation, and what you are seeing in your dreams are probably his memories.”

The words strike him hard, his mind fighting itself. There are so many things he doesn't understand, so much information he has seen in his dreams, so all of that... was true? A small wave of nausea washes over him remembering the latest nightmare

“That’s— how—?!” There’s a hard sob, hiccups, and then a sigh born from exhaustion. “Why do these memories keep coming, though?”

“I’m sorry baobei, we really don’t know. I wish I could give you an answer.”

He huffs, feeling defeated but also really tired. Then, a sudden spark of anxiety returns to his chest, something he hadn't thought before, but it looks oh so terribly possible now

“A-Niang?” he trembles. “Would you… I mean, if I weren’t his reincarnation, would you still love me?” his voice is so vulnerable, and Yanli’s heart breaks thinking how her dear son could even consider such a thing

“Oh my sweet little mooncake… I love you, I love you because you are my child, because I raised you and I know how wonderful you are, and there is nothing, nothing you could be or do that would make me love you less, you hear me?

Jin Ying honestly thought he was out of tears, but hearing his mom reassure him that he is loved for being himself and not because of his past life soothes a terror that, even if it doesn’t make everything better, it at least makes him feel good enough… for now.