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“Can you all, maybe, stay with me in the house tonight? I just… I can’t be here alone, you know?”
Souji looked down and tugged at his trouser legs for comfort. Yosuke smiled to himself, knowing that he and his partner dealt with their anxieties in a very similar way.
Lifting up his chin with a hand, Yosuke chuckled “Did you really think we were gonna let you stay here alone? Partner. Come on.”
“I called in at the Inn and said there was an emergency. You know how much my parents love you, Souji – they heard the news about your family and told me not to come back home until you were okay!” Yukiko laughed to herself, “even the assistants and chefs were pretty aggressive about it!”
“No kidding” Chie added, “I was there. Didn’t you take some time off too, Yosuke?”
“Sure did! My parents were gonna bite my head off, but when they saw the look on Teddie’s face as we explained what was going on, even my mom got a little teary…Teddie may have overstepped the mark a little, but what’s done is done. Both Teddie and I are free for the next two weeks!” Yosuke and Teddie high-fived, relieved that they didn’t have to be there during the Saturday evening sales.
“I’m formally off the case too at work and, despite my other…events…that I have to take care of, well, those are trifles. Yakushiji-san will take care of all of that in my stead. Kanji, Rise and I had decided prior that we can be with you as soon as you need it.” Naoto blushed, pulling her hat down and smiling shyly.
“Y-you guys…” Souji smiled to himself. “In that case, I’ll have to get my spare futon and sleeping bags out.” Giddy with joy, he flashed everyone a sincere, yet tired smile, which was returned by the rest of the team.
When he was back at home with his parents, he was lucky to have a sleepover maybe once a semester. He was embarrassed to remember it but, because of how itinerant his parents were, he would rarely stay in a town or city for more than one year. Forging solid bonds was near to impossible and saying goodbye was even worse if he had. He tended to avoid sleepovers and distanced himself from people he knew he would have trouble saying goodbye to.
“Perhaps… well, perhaps the stoicism he is always praised for isn’t exactly the best of qualities in our senpai” Naoto had said to Yosuke one foggy night, when she had been ordered to stand outside of Junes in place of Adachi for some reason. Yosuke nodded and sighed “I’ll never forget that he never had a shadow, and that he’s seen all of ours. He never judges, you know? But I’m sure he faced his ages ago.”
The internal turmoil of crying for as long as the team had was getting to them; some of them were starting to get headaches, intensified by Teddie’s successful attempts at making the girls laugh. “That’s creepy” Kanji muttered to himself, watching Rise cry and laugh at the same time, “Shut up, Bakanji, you’re no better!” Rise shouted, still laughing and hiccupping, pointing at Kanji’s blatantly reddened eyes. “Hey, sh-shut up, it’s so dusty in here!”
It’s true, even Kanji had cried. But that was nothing but a good thing in the watery eyes of their leader. Kanji had been in the daunting process of showing the investigation team his interests and hobbies and, while Rise had initially told him that HE was creepy, Kanji was able to laugh it off and convince her otherwise. Not long after, the entire team asked him for their own doll versions of themselves, including Marie, Nanako (and Dojima, but Nanako had to ask on his behalf). Marie’s and Dojima’s phone both had small dongles with their woolly likenesses tacked on, and everyone else was gifted a larger one for their schoolbags. Yukiko’s even had a tiny pair of gag glasses, which made her entire month. She couldn’t look at the damned thing without emitting a small “snrk”.
The punk was delighted – though he wasn’t a punk. He was just Kanji. Simple old happy Kanji, who had finally been able to express who he wanted to be to his true friends and make his family proud. His emotions were out for all to see, and okay, maybe he initially felt his heart cringe at the vulnerability, but…
“It’s not like it matters anyway, guys. We all gotta cry sometimes, even Naoto!” He pulled the shocked detective and Rise in for a gentle hug. They all basked in the moment, Naoto smiling gently Kanji’s blazer and Rise pulling him closer.
With a burst of energy, Rise jumped up, grabbing them both by the hand. “ You're right Kanji - come on now, let’s get some tea. Chie and Yukiko have boiled some for us and we don’t wanna dehydrate now, do we?”
Chie managed a grin whilst preparing the kettle. The feeling she had was bittersweet. It was sad to be here under these circumstances, and it was even sadder that they were all clearly torn up about being here under such circumstances, but… She didn’t know, it felt good. Was that bad to say? She didn’t think so. By and large, it seemed like everyone else felt the same. Melancholy, was that it? No, not quite, that’s too sad a word for Chie.
She’s smarter than she lets on to the rest of the team and even to herself. The brunette didn’t hold herself in much of a regard despite being the one who came to conclusions about the murders at a much greater speed than Yukiko or Yosuke had. She could sense something about Kubo was wrong as they met his shadow; the zany nature of his dungeon just felt so, improper. As though he didn’t really know what murder meant, really. He was definitely the makings of a psychopath, but you could see he had no idea what he was doing. Plus, it’s not like he even showed awareness of the shadows around him, whereas someone who knew about that world surely must, right? She should have said something sooner. She needs to believe in herself more.
Souji showed her that part of herself. He didn’t try to defend her against those bullies, he knew she was a force to be reckoned with. He knew that there was a sea of quickly turning cogs behind those eyes of hers and it’s what immediately drew him to her. She knew, deep down, that they were very similar. So she’s smiling right now, for him, for them and for herself. She would so love to be the strong one, the one they could all lean on.
Why was it so hard this time, though?
She felt a hand on her own.
“Ah! S-s-souji, it’s you! Hehe,” Chie’s teeth were quietly chattering behind her lips, “what’s wrong?”
“I could say the same to you”, Yosuke walked to stand beside Souji and gave her a concerned look “your hands are shaking like crazy and you’ve been staring at the hallway for ten minutes.”
“W-what?” Chie panicked. Was she not in control of this? “I’m fine, Souji, Yosuke, seriously – I was just thinking about something. I promise. It’s fine. I’m fine.” Souji and Yosuke looked at each other, then back to her. “Okay, could you come here please?” The cocky brunet and their grey-haired leader opened their arms around her, engulfing her in another hug.
This is silly, we did this before… Why are we doing this again? This is for Souji, we’re doing this for him, not for me! Stop crying!
Wrapping her arms around the two, she cried into Yosuke’s jacket once more, heaving and shaking and letting her teeth chatter as much as they wanted. God, how much anxiety must she have harboured all this time? She thinks that probably since two weeks ago, since they saved Naoto. Saving her meant it wasn’t over and the realisation of that hit her in waves at school, at Junes with Yukiko, anywhere. The guilt overtook her, but she’s letting it go here. She needs to. It’s a feeling they all have to let go of and they can do it freely here.
“We didn’t know, Chie, none of us knew it was going to be Nana-chan.” How did Yosuke know what she was thinking? “Right, but we got in there as soon as possible.” Souji added, stroking the hair on her head. “We did so well. Here, Yosuke, you take her and I’ll pour us all some more of that tea. Thanks for making extra, Chie.” Yosuke held her and walked her slowly to the sofa, letting her nestle her head into Yosuke’s neck. He blushed, noticing she was still breathing really heavily. It was worrying.
An idea occurred to him. “Hey Chie, do you remember the slogan at Souzai Daigaku? It’s really long, I think it went “Steak skewers soothe the soul, crunchy croquettes calm you in the cold…” He started to slowly chant the slogan that the owners had written on a business card to his father. Chie laughed quietly and mentally followed the slogan’s rhythm, taking slower and more shallow breaths with each repetition. Yosuke held her closer and closed his eyes for a few minutes. Chie did the same. The heights of their emotions today would easily make it more difficult to sleep tonight, but the entire environment felt a lot more light-hearted. Chie smiled into his shirt. “Thanks, Yosuke.”
“It’s no problem.”
Seeing her friend share a moment with the leader and Yosuke, Yukiko decided to have her own moment outside. She decided she needed the air.
Yukiko loved her friends, perhaps more than she loved herself, to be honest. Being with them gave her a kind of joy that she wasn’t able to find in her own company, but she was getting there. In the midst of finding out who she truly was, she thought it would be best to leave Inaba. She had been dead-set on the idea of abandoning this place since what she thought was the beginning. But her feet went cold, and not because of the chilly November air.
“Whatcha thinking about, Yuki-chan?” Teddie slid open the door, noticing she had slipped away from the commotion.
“Oh nothing, Teddie. It was just cold, so I wanted some air.” She wasn’t lying, but there was another reason why she had stood outside. She had made eye contact with the bucket and spade Souji kept beside the table in the house and thought of Nanako. She wanted to see what they had been growing.
“Let’s have a look at the garden, Teddie.” The black-haired girl walked around the front of the house to take a peek, expecting some buds, maybe some small flowers growing.
“WOAH!! Look at that, Yukiko-chan!” Teddie exclaimed, pointing at the enormous, reaching branches of the 5 tomato plants standing proudly at the side of the Dojima residence.
Suddenly, the sight of these beautiful tomatoes reminded her of Heaven, Nanako’s…place. Yukiko needed to fully heal the whole team but she was exhausted, mid-battle. Souji had thrown two tomatoes at her, and yelled “Try them, you’ll love them!” She had a small taste, and the burst of energy she got left her asking for more. For some reason, it gave her the jolt of energy she needed to heal the rest of the team.
“Are these...?” Yukiko reached to touch one. Before she could, a hand reached out from behind her and picked one from a branch. “Wow, they’re ready. Tiny soul tomatoes, they’re called. Wanna try?” Souji stood beside her and handed her the little tomato. Sure enough, one bite and she was taken back to that battle, to that taste.
“Have you been…? For inside the TV?” Souji laughed lightly and nodded “Look, I didn’t know they’d be useful until I brought some in a bag with me and forgot to eat them at lunchtime. Tomatoes, wheat, cabbage, Nanako and I have been growing a fair few veggies here over the months.”
“Wow, I didn’t know. My thanks to you and Nanako, you both…you both saved me and the team back then. But you’re always doing that, aren’t you?” Yukiko knelt down beside the garden. He shook his head. “Come on Yukiko, they’re tomatoes. You’re the one with the magic.” Kneeling down beside her, Souji and Teddie looked on to the prideful plants. Teddie chirped “Yuki-chan, you’re the one who saves us. I have healing magic too, but yours is unbelievable. It takes my breath away!”
“He’s right. Amaterasu is absolutely fearless, and so are you. You both do some amazing work inside the TV, it’s like you almost never run out of energy.” Yukiko blushed fiercely, trying to mute the buzzing and whirring of Amaterasu’s restless wings on hearing such a genuine compliment.
“But…Sometimes we run out of magic. I pushed you all too hard that day, it was my responsibility. I forgot that about all of us. You have every right to be angry” Souji turned inwardly to himself, starting to press his fingers into his eyebrows. ‘Maybe he had a headache too?’ thought Teddie.
“Hey, hey, come on, it’s not worth thinking like that Sensei!” Teddie got up to give the leader an impromptu head massage.
Yukiko took the opportunity to hold his hand. “Yes, Teddie is absolutely right, Souji. We all felt exactly the same as you at the time, we all ran in there without properly preparing. But we did it. Just…”
Yukiko looked down.
“Hmm? Yukiko? Just what?” Souji touched her chin, to try and and lift her head up. “Are you…”
What he saw surprised him. On expecting an upset Yukiko, he instead saw the face of a very repressed fit of laughter. Chuckling, Souji muttered “Oh no.. what is it, Yukiko?”
“Just-just…Just..” She breathed “Just imagine if Teddie was our leader! I would still be in the castle! HAHAHAHAHA!!!” Yukiko’s dark humour finally struck a note with the other two, precipitating a laughing fit from all of them. Among his fits of laughter, Teddie attempted to take offence, stating “he was beary equipped for the leader role” which unfortunately only made them all laugh harder.
After a few minutes of rolling around and making fun of Teddie, Souji began to take note that some of the neighbours were watching he and the other two. “Come on, you two. Let’s get back inside, it’s cold!” Blushing and wiping their tears away, Yukiko and Teddie nodded “Yes, Leader!”
Teddie rushed in first, making a beeline to Yosuke to repeat Yukiko’s dark joke. While he did so, Yukiko took the opportunity to lean in and kiss Souji on the cheek. “Thank you, leader. You’re always thinking about us.”
That was it. That’s what she loved about Inaba. She was thought about. Cared for. It was unconditionally given to her and she, in turn, dealt out her equal share of love. Smiling and holding hands tightly, they both walked back into the bustling house.
With any luck, they would all finally get a good night’s rest tonight.
Some time passed, and the Dojima residence settled.