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“Are you okay?” May asks him, leaned against the frame of his open door, a steaming cup of coffee in her hand and a silk robe knotted shut over her pajamas.
“Sure. I’m fine,” Peter says and holds back a wince – he doesn’t even believe himself. He continues to fiddle with the new notebooks he’s shoving in his ratty book bag, fraying and stained from his summer on the run. May offered to get him a new one but he had – stupidly – declined. And, yes, he regrets it now.
The look May levels him with is one of disbelief but he chooses to ignore it in favor of completely unpacking and repacking his bag, shoving his suit into the dark recesses and trying to ignore it. He hasn’t been out as Spider-Man since… well anyway he doesn’t really use his suit as much anymore but he can’t stand to not have it with him. He hasn’t told his SHIELD assigned therapist that yet but he can imagine what she would say.
It’s not pretty.
“You look real fine,” May tells him in her no nonsense way but then her face softens. “You know you don’t have to do this right sweetie? You can home school if you want?”
Peter’s fingers tap a staccato rhythm against his pants leg and he clenches his fist tight enough to turn his knuckles white to stop it. “I know May,” he says. He did consider it for a while but he genuinely loved Midtown and he wanted to have a normal senior year with Ned and MJ; apply to colleges, go to prom and on dates with MJ, graduate. He wanted to get into MIT just like Mr. Stark and share a dorm with Ned and just… be normal.
May lets out a sigh and enters the room, setting her cooling coffee mug on his desk and untangling his fingers from the strap of his bag before pulling him into a warm hug. Peter melts into her and reaches his arms up to hug her back gently. He loves her more than anything and he absolutely hates what he’s put her through. He hates that she can’t work at FEAST anymore, that she basically has to have a bodyguard with her everywhere she goes because of him. That all of her friends have alienated her except for Pepper Potts who lives over two hours away and can’t really visit.
“It’s going to be okay Petey,” she tells him softly as she rocks them back and forth using his childhood nickname and making tears well in his eyes. He’s already cried twice in the last twelve hours so he needs to dry it up or he’s going to look like even more of a mess when he gets to school. “I believe in you and I know you can do it but just know you can leave at any point okay? Remember the meeting with Morita? Just ask and you can leave.”
“I know,” Peter says into her hair – it smells like her favorite jasmine shampoo and the familiar scent is comforting. “I’ll be fine.”
A knock sounds at the door ending their embrace and May looks at her watch and frowns. “Happy’s early,” she mutters, grabbing her coffee cup and shuffling to the door. “Finish packing!” She calls over her shoulder and Peter haphazardly shoves the rest of his things into his bag so that he can join her in the living room as she opens the door and lets out a soft ‘oh’.
“Ned?” Peter says, confused at seeing his best friend in the hallway outside his front door smiling a massive smile. “MJ?” His girlfriend stands next to Ned looking just as bored and unaffected as usual except for the slightly faintly look in her eye that he knows means she’s nervous. “What are you doing here?”
“Did you honestly think we were going to let you rejoin society completely on your own?” MJ asks with a raised eye brow and a smirk.
“Yeah Peter what do you take us for?” Ned jokes, walking through the open door and giving May a quick hug as she closes the door behind them.
And, yeah, here come the waterworks again Peter thinks as he sniffs wetly. Ned and MJ had both spent most of the summer on the run with him or hiding in Dr. Strange’s weird house and he knows today is just a big of a deal for them as it is for him and he never would have thought that they would… he sniffs again and wipes his eyes. “Thanks,” he says sincerely, choked up as he pulls them both in for a hug.
Ned returns the hug, now just as emotional but he can basically feel MJ’s eye roll as she returns his hug. “I can’t believe you actually thought we weren’t going to be here after everything loser,” her voice is fond and Peter squeezes her just a bit tighter. “Besides, I want to see the look on Flash’s face – he has such a massive crush on Spider-Man that his face will make a great addition to my ‘In Distress’ series.”
Ned and Peter both laugh and Peter releases them both. He revels in the warmth for just one more minute before he sobers to say “You don’t have to do this. It could put a target on your backs and I don’t want you to get hurt.” Ned and MJ share a commiserating look with each other before leveling Peter with twin glares and he holds up his hands in surrender. “Just checking!”
He had tried to break ties with both of them when he left at the beginning of the summer but was told, under no uncertain terms, that he wasn’t allowed to make their decisions for them. MJ’s impassioned speech had also contained a thirty minute detailed history of women’s rights and how chivalry was just another way men belittled them and Peter really couldn’t love her any more if he tried.
Before either one of them got the opportunity to lecture Peter again there was a brief knock at the door before Happy opened it and walked in, studiously avoiding looking at May who was fighting a smile of her own. They had been on-again-off-again for months and Peter really didn’t want to think about it. “Hey Happy!” He said, going for bright but falling short and flat. Graciously, no one pointed it out.
“Didn’t know I was chauffeuring half of your school,” he grumbled and Peter’s smile became more genuine – Happy liked to pretend to be gruff but they all had his number – he was super soft and gooey on the inside. “You ready to go?”
Was he ready to go? No, not really, but he needed to so he just nodded, tightening his bag straps around his shoulders and turning to pull May into another quick hug. “I’ll see you after school,” she whispered into his ear with another quick squeeze before moving on to repeat the gesture with Ned and MJ. “Have a good day!” She told all of them as Peter slipped his hand into Michelle’s and followed Happy to the elevator. One of the two SHIELD agents that were constantly stationed outside his apartment followed behind them as unobtrusively as possible but it still made Peter’s skin crawl.
Nick Fury – the real one, not the Skrull (holy shit an actual shape-shifting alien!) that Peter had met in Europe – had assigned he and May a full security detail once he had been cleared of all charges. Peter had hoped they would be gone by the time school started but Fury was nothing if not cautious and Peter had to accept that they would probably be following him for most of the school year. At least he had managed to talk Fury and Hill into keeping them outside the school so he wasn’t being followed by a bunch of guys in suits to all of his high school classes.
“You good kid?” Happy asked once they had slipped into his town car and pulled away from the curb, Peter sitting in between Ned and MJ and a SHIELD vehicle following closely behind them as they navigated the Queens streets.
“Yep. I’m good. Great. So good,” Peter rambled, ignoring the heavy looks MJ, Ned and Happy all shared.
“You sound great,” Happy said sarcastically, flicking his eyes back to the road. The rest of the car ride to Midtown was filled with oppressive silence as Peter’s heart rate ratcheted up higher and higher the closer they got until it felt like it was pounding in his chest when they pulled into the parking lot. The group of four SHIELD agents behind them all left their SUV and ignored the curious stares of the mass of teenagers milling in front of the school as they disappeared into the masses.
“You ready to go Tiger?” MJ asked, taking Peter’s hand and squeezing it again.
Peter gulped, his mouth and throat suddenly dry. “Sure,” he croaked out.
“Dude,” Ned muttered. “You don’t have to do this; you know that right? You don’t have anything to prove.”
“I know,” Peter agreed. “But I need to do this.”
Ned studied his intently for another moment before nodding once. “Then lets go.”
The yard fell completely silent for about ten seconds when Peter exited the car, flanked by Ned and MJ, before everyone started furiously gossiping and pointing at him. Perter felt his cheeks heat up and he ducked his head. “Ignore them,” MJ said, grabbing Ned’s hand with her free one and pulling both of them forward. The crowd parted for them, staring at Peter like he was on display but no one dared to risk MJ’s wrath and approach them.
The hall’s were just as crowded when they stumbled through the front doors but the flood of students inside must have already heard about their arrival since they were, with the level of failed surreptitiousness that only teenagers could achieve, taking pictures and videos of Peter’s entrance into the school. He could feel his face paling and he let his eyes glaze over and go out of focus as his breath quickened.
“Don’t,” MJ said, pulling him along to his locker. “Get your chin up,” she hissed at him, “they’re piranhas, don’t show weakness.”
“Don’t show weakness,” Peter said weakly, feeling a little faint. “Right.”
“Back off,” he heard Ned say angrily to a group of juniors who were approaching Peter with hungry expressions and phones out. “Don’t you have a class to get to?”
“Clear the halls!” Mr. Harrington called from outside his classroom. “Home room starts in two minutes! Get a move on!” He caught Peter’s eye and winked at him as he started herding the unruly groups along and Peter felt something settle in his just a little.
‘Come on Spider-Man,’ He said, cracking his neck a bit and trying to hype himself up. ‘Come on Peter. They’re just people. You’ve got this.’ He rolled his shoulders back and kept walking, trying to put more confidence in his step and ignoring the surprised faces of his friends as he pushed through the crowd to his locker.
Ned split off to head a little further down the hall to get his own things but Michelle opened the locker next to his and gave him a self-satisfied smile. “That was hot,” she told him with a ridiculous wiggle of her eye brows and he let out a loud laugh, giving her a fond look as he stowed his gym bag and slammed the door shut.
“I’ll have to keep it up then,” he said, trying for confident and focusing on her slightly chapped lips. He really wanted to kiss her.
She snorted and grabbed his hand again. “Later Tiger,” she promised. “But only if you make it through the whole day.”
He grinned back at her, finally settling and ignoring all the people watching them. “How could I not with a promise like that?”
Ned had just joined them when, out of nowhere, Flash planted himself directly in their path, leveling an angry glare at Peter opening and closing his mouth a few times before finally just pointing at him.
“Yes Flash?” Peter asked, confused and tilting his head to the side at his frenemies odd behavior. Flash let out a growl of frustration.
“You’re Spider-Man,” he finally said.
“Uh…” Peter said, taken aback a little. “Yeah? Old news right?”
“You’re Spider-Man,” he said again, sounding beyond angry and yanking at his slicked back hair, mussing it. “You actually let me… I’m Spider-Man’s biggest… you let me call you penis!”
Ned snorted, his face turning red from trying to contain his laugh and even MJ looked a little smug. Perter just smiled. “And?”
Flash dropped his hand, looking crestfallen. “We’re you ever planning to tell me?”
“It’s called a secret identity for a reason Flash,” Peter pointed out and Flash rolled his eyes.
“Fair point I guess,” he agreed, hitching his bag up his shoulder. “See you at lunch Parker.”
Peter stared after him, bemused. “Did that just happen?”
“Oh yeah,” Ned cackled. “And I filmed it!”
Peter laughed and started walking again just as the first bell rang. Maybe he could do this after all.