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“Sif, please. No more. I beg you.”
Loki sits on the floor on his knees with his head down in defeat. He knows what's to come. Sif would come storming into the room once again and angrily say, “You conniving, craven, pathetic little worm. You did this,” while holding her chopped hair in her hand.
He would be slapped, kneed in the groin, and punched in the face. Just as he had been countless times before.
Loki was desperate to break the time loop and escape this terrible hellhole. As she stomped toward him again, Loki held up his hand in surrender.
“Please, no more.”
He was going to try and reason with her this time around. With desperation in his voice, Loki says, “I’m a horrible person. I get it. I really am. I cut off your hair because I thought it’d be funny. And it’s not.”
That seems to get him somewhere because Sif pauses and takes a deep breath. Loki continues, “I crave attention because I’m a narcissist. And I suppose it’s because I’m scared of being alone.”
Sif closes her eyes, simply exasperated with the situation. She takes another deep breath and holds out a hand to Loki, helping him stand. Sif then pulls him forward by the hand she holds. With a firm tone, she says, “You are alone, and you always will be.” She then strides out of the room quickly.
Grief pours through Loki as Sif's words hit him. Sure, he had done some terrible things in his life, but he didn't deserve to be alone forever?
….Or, did he?
He’d always been an outcast in his life, never truly fitting in with his family, and without close friends. He was the God of Mischief and would create chaos wherever he went. He had always thought that loneliness was only a temporary price that he was forced to pay.
For a long moment after Sif leaves, Loki stands there, frozen in place, looking dejected. He considers the collar around his throat, the tightness in his chest. Perhaps he was always destined to be punished at the hands of those who he had wronged. He has never felt as alone as he does right then.
He sits back on his knees, head down.
Sif's statement from earlier in the time loop replays in his mind: I hope you know you deserve to be alone and you always will be.
Tears start to gather at the corner of his eyes without his permission. He wipes them away immediately, refusing to admit how sad he feels to himself. He suspects he has about thirty more seconds until Sif will come to admonish him once again.
Except for this time, when the thirty seconds were up, Sif didn’t storm in his direction.
Loki heard soft footsteps heard toward him, but he couldn’t bring himself to look up.
The footsteps stopped right before him, as though expecting him to acknowledge their owner's presence. Loki sighed, finally looking up.
He fully expected to see Sif’s hateful expression, but Sylvie stood before him with a kind smile on her face.
She knelt down next to him, “Hey, you.”
“Sylvie, how did you ever escape?” Loki asks incredulously. Her presence alone shifts his entire mood. Just moments ago, he was ready to accept his fate in this bad memory prison. But seeing her here, here to undoubtedly save him, filled him with joy.
Sylvie rolls her eyes. “What a foolish question. I’ve spent years trying to figure out how to bring down this organization. Of course, I’d have a few tricks up my sleeve.”
He finds himself looking at her in wonder. “You’re amazing, really. Thank you for coming for me, Sylvie.”
Sylvie looks down at the space between them, at the few inches between her shoes and his knees on the Asgardian cobblestone. “I’ve been here for a few minutes. I heard what Sif said to you.” She meets his eyes once more. “You don’t really believe that, do you?”
The weight of her words hit him instantly. She’s asking if he thinks if he’ll always be alone, as though he hasn’t always been his entire life. Loki forces himself to brush it off. He chuckles, a harsh noise between them. “I don’t know what you mean.”
“I mean to say that you don’t deserve to be alone. That’s a ridiculous notion,” Sylvie reassures him.
Loki fiddles with his hands in his lap, nervous. He decides to play it off.
“Please, as though I could think of myself as deserving anything less than complete happiness. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He looks away, unable to meet her eyes. His lie sounds unconvincing to even himself.
He’s always been defensive like this, and for the first time, Loki finds himself regretting the tough outer shell he’s built to protect himself. Being vulnerable has never come easy to him.
“Loki, look at me,” she asks gently. Sylvie looks at him fondly. Two sets of eyes, the exact same shade of piercing blue, meet again. The look she gives him tells that she sees right through his lie. And right then, he feels like he’s known her forever. As though she’s always known that he’s used his arrogance as a shield. Perhaps she’s done the same.
“It hasn’t been easy, spending my life living between catastrophes. I’ve spent most of my life alone. And I suspect it’s been similar for you, hasn’t it?”
After a brief pause, Loki nods his response.
“I felt the same way until Lamentis,” Sylvie confesses. Loki searches her eyes briefly, as though to confirm that she's telling the truth. He finds no lie between them, just pure honesty.
Sylvie continues, “I’ve never had a partner on any of my missions before. And it certainly wasn’t easy to trust you. Hell, you derailed the plan I’d spent years making." She throws her hands up in frustration to illustrate the point. "But the more time I spent with you, the more I started to realize that it was finally possible to have someone understand me for who I was. And who would understand me better than a fellow Loki?” she asks with a small laugh.
Loki finds himself smiling in return.
“Talking with you felt like talking with myself, it felt natural. Like I didn’t have to explain anything,” Loki confesses.
“It was the same for me,” Sylvie says.
“Listen, Loki…” she hesitates.
“Yes?”
Sylvie tries again. “What I’m trying to say is, you don’t need to feel alone anymore. Not as long as you have me,” she explains.
Loki feels warmth spread through his chest. He’s elated that he can trust Sylvie. Not only has Sylvie come to save him, but she also wants to continue being around him. He can’t quite remember being ‘friends’ or whatever this was with anyone before. At least never with someone who truly understood him.
Loki smiles with his bright teeth on full display. “Oh gosh. Well, this sure is new for me. Erm, you don't need to feel alone either. As I said before, Loki’s aren’t destined to lose. We'd make a good team. And well, of course, the ‘God and Goddess of Mischief’ certainly has a good ring to it.”
Sylvie giggles, “It most certainly does.” She then holds a hand out to him, and her warm palm fits so perfectly against his that Loki closes his eyes briefly to savor the feeling. She pulls him up to stand beside her.
With his added inches of height, Sylvie has to tilt her head up to hold his warm gaze.
The energy between them doesn’t feel unlike the sparks that Thor's hammer radiates.
“How about we find out who or what is exactly behind the TVA? We can put an end to this wicked organization,” Loki suggests.
“I thought you’d never ask,” Sylvie beams at him. Having at least one other person help her take down the TVA would make her job a million times easier. Plus he was certainly easy on the eyes.
Sylvie creates a portal for them to leave the time loop.
She holds her hand out to Loki and asks, “Let’s make mischief together, shall we?”