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“You know the Commander?” Vega says, tilting his head and casting a curious glance over at Major Alenko. It’s not like they’re buddies or something, but they’ve talked a couple of times, yet he’s never heard him even mention Shepard. James hasn’t met many people—Alliance or otherwise—who would pass up on an opportunity to name-drop the Commander whenever possible, no matter how brief or casual whatever run-in with Shepard they might’ve had. So that’d seem a little odd all on its own, even without including how surprised the Commander had sounded when they first spotted Alenko.
And hearing the Commander casually call a fellow officer by his first name, and how Shepard acted almost unsure of what to do...? You don’t need to be a detective to suspect there might be a story there.
Shepard himself has the act of being distantly polite and friendly without ever getting too personal down to an art, though, so Vega’s never expected to get any good gossip out of that guy.
“I used to,” Alenko says, voice trailing off as he stares after the Commander. James furrows his brows. He sounds almost—wistful? Longing? What the hell.
“...Uh. Right. Cool,” James says with a nod, like he isn’t silently wondering what in the world that’s supposed to even mean.
The Major sighs, finally turning away from where he’s been glued to the spot since Shepard turned the corner and disappeared from their view.
Hm, yeah, no.
There’s definitely a story there.
~
James keeps his eyes trained on the wall, trying his hardest to blend into the environment and seem as inconspicuous as possible. A pretty challenging task when said environment is the close confinement of a lift on Mars and you’re a 6'2" package of dedicatedly crafted muscles, but damn if he isn’t going to give it his best shot. Commander Shepard himself probably wouldn’t have any issue doing it, despite being both pretty tall and beefy too—but Vega’s more used to storming his way into fights rather than lurking in the dark and taking out enemies before they can even realize he’s there. All that complicated tech stuff Shepard’s such a boss at has never been Vega’s strength as a soldier, yet he’s kind of starting to wish he’d ever asked Shepard to maybe give him a few tips at some point in all those months back on Earth. Specifically the ability to turn himself invisible, even if just for a few seconds, sounds pretty damn appealing right about now.
Shepard himself doesn’t currently seem interested in taking advantage of his unique skills, though—or even of the fact that he’s their commanding officer right now. Instead he listens as Alenko throws yet another accusation at him, the Major’s distrust blatant, and this time Shepard’s only response is to put a hand on his hip and press his free palm to his forehead as he says, “Kaidan...”
James has to bite his own tongue.
That’s a damn difference from how the Commander had chewed him out for daring to question things when they left Earth.
“Don’t ‘Kaidan’ me, this is business!” Major Alenko says—squeaks, really—evidently also not caring about who’s currently supposed to be the commanding officer here.
Once again Vega finds himself wondering what the hell he’s even stumbled into today. He firmly pretends he doesn’t see the way Shepard slides up next to Alenko and leans in close, trying to catch the Major’s eye even though they’re all still fully geared up, breather helmets included.
Shutting up has never been one of Vega’s finest talents, though, so when their circular arguments just keep going, he decides to finally chime in. “Commander Shepard’s been under constant surveillance since coming back to Earth,” he says, because it seems like the right thing to do. Maybe with Alenko getting some reassurance and the Commander some backup, they can both tone it down. At least until this mission gets sorted. “No way they’ve communicated since.”
The only acknowledgement he gets is Alenko shooting him a quick glare through the visor of his helmet, looking like he’d forgotten Vega was even there and now he’s royally pissed off at the reminder.
James decides it’s probably best not to say anything else after that.
After being with them on the Normandy during the ride here, sharing a shuttle down to Mars, and having to listen to the two men’s bickering mixing with the sound of gunfire as they fought their way through the heavily armed Cerberus troops just outside—he has settled on the only logical conclusion to all of this.
Whatever the hell went down between those two sure isn’t just some juicy Alliance story; can’t only be about soldiers on a mission or something.
It’s a goddamn lovers’ quarrel.
~
“You, uh. Want a moment alone, Commander?” James says quietly, shifting from foot to foot before he catches himself and straightens his back, posture perfect and military-precise to keep his anxiety in check. If he’d felt awkward earlier while still on Mars, it’s nothing compared to now. Seriously. He’d pick awkwardly listening to your CO squabble with his whatever-they-are any second over being the guy who, kind of, by extension, almost got his CO’s whatever-Alenko-is-to-him killed.
Shepard nods stiffly in his direction, jaw clenched tight. “Thanks, James,” he says gruffly. He looks—
Shit. Vega doesn’t even know what Shepard looks like right now.
Maybe he’s not personally Commander Shepard’s best bro or whatever, wouldn’t say he even knows him all that well, but James has always admired him (hell, doesn’t everyone?). Even with all the personal crap he had to face because of what Shepard did about the Collectors, and even when Shepard’s being an asshole, like just earlier today—already feels like it’s been so much longer, though, somehow—when they had to leave Earth and James had no choice but to come with.
Because that’s the thing about Shepard.
A big part of why he’s so admired by so many is how he always just leaps into action. How he can visualize and accurately estimate an outcome where the end will justify the means of whatever loco decision he makes, even when others will only see the whole ‘batshit insane’ part of it all.
Survived a slaver raid gone wrong while everyone else was killed or kidnapped when he was just a teen. The only marine to make it out of that horror shitshow on Akuze alive. Came back from the freaking dead, and is now expected to single-handedly be the one to rally help for Earth and more or less solve the Reaper war. That’s just the kind of shit he does.
The Commander always has a solution, some way out, along with words to offer hope or inspire others on the way while he’s at it.
Shepard never stops, and has never backed down.
Yet now he stands right across the room from James in the medbay, next to the bed they put Alenko on, and looks fucking defeated.
And it can’t have been about whatever Admiral Hackett had to tell him when Shepard left to accept the vidcomm transmission earlier. At least not entirely. Shepard already had that same devastated expression while carrying Alenko’s unconscious body up the ramp back to the Normandy. He’d stood perfectly still in the elevator ride to the medbay, teeth digging into his own bottom lip so hard Vega almost winced when he noticed it. The Commander only kept looking more lost and unsure and beyond worried as he held Alenko in his arms while T’Soni did a quick scan over the Major’s head and down his back, checking for critical injuries or fractures.
“His implant,” Shepard was the first to break the silence between them, his voice hoarse. “Liara, is he—? Did it—?”
“No telling yet of any lasting damage, but for now, we still have hope,” T’Soni said, keeping her tone factual but gentle as she glanced up at him. Shepard only kept staring at Alenko, until she reached out and gently put her palm over the back of Shepard’s hand where it was gripping Alenko’s thigh, then gave him a reassuring squeeze. “Kaidan is a fighter, Commander. We both know that.”
Shepard finally met her gaze and gave a jerky nod in acknowledgment, but he didn’t actually look all that comforted—still shook up in a way James almost felt distressed over just witnessing.
It only got worse once they had to carefully remove the Major’s cracked helmet to make sure he wasn’t choking on his own blood or something, when Shepard saw the bruises and nosebleed on Alenko’s face. Not until they’d made it to the medbay, when T’Soni kicked him into gear by raising her voice at him, did Shepard seem to snap himself out of some of the shock. Once they had their course set to the Citadel and EDI told him about Admiral Hackett’s incoming call, James almost felt like he was finally starting to recognize the Commander again.
But now Shepard’s back here in the medbay, shoulders slumped and with a grim expression on his face. For the first time that James has seen, he looks every bit as exhausted as one would expect from a man who has been through some of the shit that Shepard has.
James knows he should go already, leave Shepard alone for a moment, but—he feels like he should say something.
What the hell could he even say, though?
They’d all heard Shepard’s scream when that—robot—thing, whatever the hell it was—had swung Alenko’s body around in its grip like he weighed nothing and pulled its arm back. It all happened so fast that the only thing they could do was watch in horror as they saw Alenko get his head smashed against the shuttle and heard his cry of pain through the communicators in their helmets.
Shepard was firing his gun before the robot had even finished turning towards him after it’d dropped Alenko; his aim steady and with zero hesitation as he put shot after shot into the chest of that human-shaped piece of crap until it fell lifeless to the ground.
Only then did Shepard freeze, grip on his gun held firm and still aimed, until the silence finally broke when Shepard sucked in a shaky breath. Orders were barked, everyone hurrying into action again as the Normandy finally showed up—along with the fucking Reapers—while Shepard ran towards Alenko.
Their comms were still on, though.
James still feels like he’d listened in on something private, something no one else should’ve heard. Something he wishes he could’ve cut off. Because the panic in Shepard’s voice as he’d called, “Kaidan! Kaidan?” and knelt at Alenko’s side, before scooping the man up in his arms? That’s the kind of thing not meant for anyone else’s ears. James can’t even think about the desperate and pleading, “I got you, Kaidan, come on—I’m getting you out of here,” that had followed without feeling guilty. He’s not supposed to know what the Commander’s voice sounds like when it breaks around a whispered, “Kaidan, don’t—fuck, don’t do this to me, please—please please please—” the way it’d done as they all hurried towards the shuttle bay.
If the arguing he’d witnessed earlier hadn’t already clued him in, that definitely would’ve told James all he needed to know in order to figure out what those two must be to each other.
“I’ll, uh—I’ll be... I’ll be around,” James finally settles on saying, pointing a thumb at the doors even though Shepard isn’t even looking his way. “Here—right outside, if you need me for anything, Commander. Just... lemme know, alright?”
“Yeah. Yeah, sure thing, James.” Shepard casts a quick glance back at him and clears his throat, like that’ll help to hide some of the raw hurt in his voice. “Thanks.”
James nods at him with a, “Sir.” and salutes before leaving.
Looking over his shoulder, the last thing he sees before the doors close is Shepard reaching out and taking Alenko’s hand in his own.
~
“L2 still doing good?”
“Your nicknames can be pretty uninspired sometimes, Vega,” Shepard says with a raise of his eyebrow. “Or, very obvious, at least.”
It was either that or Loverboy, James bites his own cheek not to blurt out. Instead he shrugs, crosses his arms and looks out at the view of the D24 docking bay where they’re standing on the Citadel. “It’s true, no? Guy’s still got his brain and biotics working and that implant is all intact, right?”
Shepard sighs, rubbing a hand across his jaw. It’s dark with stubble, and not the five o’clock shadow the Commander’s usually sporting, but more like someone who seriously needs to start taking a look in the mirror if he’s going to be visiting his boo. Jeez.
“I’ve heard that said implant got a little, um, rattled, but... yeah.” Shepard finally smiles as he glances out at the ships passing by. Beginnings of a beard on his face or not, there’s definitely some of that relaxed and easy confidence back to the Commander’s whole aura going on again. “Yeah, he’ll be fine.”
“Glad to hear it, Loco.” James slaps a friendly hand to Shepard’s shoulder and smiles back at him.
“You should go visit him,” Shepard says. “I’m sure he’d appreciate it.”
“Huh? Oh, uh, I dunno. I mean, sure, I was kinda planning on it, but... we don’t really know each other. Didn’t know if he’d be up for random visitors just yet.” He shakes his grip on Shepard’s shoulder a little, grin widening. “Besides, you’ll always be here whenever we’re docked, Loco, and I’m sure the Major appreciates your company far more than anyone else who could go see him.”
“What?” Shepard looks suddenly startled, and as James drops his hand from his shoulder, he swears he can almost see a blush creeping up the Commander’s face.
“Oh, I think you know what I mean.”
“No? What are you—” Shepard starts sputtering, his ears having turned bright red. “That’s not—Kaidan’s—he’d—I mean, I would never—um.” He abruptly cuts himself off and shakes his head, brows furrowing as he glares off into the distance, like Shepard himself doesn’t even know what the hell is happening in his own head right now. “I, uh. I should go.”
Vega’s eyebrows shoot up. If that’s true, then they both should, since the only reason they’re even waiting here to begin with is to get clearance to board the Normandy and take off.
He watches, confused and intrigued and amused all at once as Shepard first walks with sure steps towards the D24 doors and then is forced to face his own mistake when they don’t unlock to slide open upon his approach. There’s a long beat of Shepard standing completely still before he lifts his arm, powering up his omni-tool. After some tinkering, the doors slide open, and James stares in disbelief as he realizes that Shepard must’ve used his Spectre status to override the lock before the man finally sets into a half-jog and disappears out of view.
Damn, James thinks. All that work, just to get away from their conversation. Every man really does have his weakness, huh? Even Commander Shepard, humanity’s best and brightest.
Most of the Commander’s enemies—or even admirers—probably wouldn’t have guessed that Shepard’s comes in the form of a Canadian human biotic.
James grins, shaking his head to himself as he turns back to look out at the passing ships, happy to know that both L2 and Loco are going to be just fine.