Chapter Text
The Switch Got Flicked
“You love him, don’t you?”
“What?”
“You’re just jealous because Agent Mulder and I have a special connection and you’re trying to divert me to Holman.”
“What?”
Scully looked at Sheila Fontaine as though she’d lost her mind. Maybe she had. It would explain a hell of lot for Scully, including why this woman had felt the need to kiss her partner earlier on. She still hadn’t let Mulder off the hook for that one either since it didn’t look like he was even attempting to fight her off.
Shifting on her feet, she shook her head and glanced nervously at the gurgling sink unit by her hip. From the sounds of it, bad things were happening down in the Kroner sewer system.
“Look,” she said patiently, swiping her tongue over her lips and returning her attention to Sheila, “what I’m trying to say is that Holman is in love with you and because of his feelings for you, it’s somehow given him the ability to control the weather. All those incidents you told us about, the tornado and, and, the snow on your wedding day? The laughing clouds? That’s all because of Holman.”
Sheila looked at Scully, trying to work something out, but the way she stared at Scully only made her feel nervous. “You didn’t answer my question,” she said after a moment.
“What are you-”
“About being in love with Agent Mulder.” She leant against the sink next to Scully and let out a long sigh. “I know you are. It’s written all over your pretty face,” she said without a hint of malice.
“I don’t-”
“Oh please,” interrupted Sheila with a half smile and an eye roll. “This is where you say I don’t know what you’re talking about, isn’t it?” She sighed and looked at Scully. “I’m not stupid Agent Scully. I can see exactly why you’re pushing me towards Holman. It’s so you can have Agent Mulder all to yourself. Well I'm sorry if you don’t like it that he and I have something between us. We have a chemistry you wouldn’t understand.”
“That’s not why I’m...” Scully shook her head and rubbed a hand over her eyes wearily.
Sheila stared at Scully, sizing her up and picked up her purse. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to go and find Agent Mulder.”
“Okay, yes, you’re right,” Scully suddenly blurted, feeling herself going red when Sheila stopped and turned to look at her. “I’m in love with him.”
She glanced at the other woman and looked away again, feeling a weight lift off her as she uttered the words aloud for the first time. It was one thing to think them, but hearing them out loud, from her own mouth, felt empowering and while she wasn’t quite sure why she was admitting her deepest secret to this perfect stranger, it felt good to actually be able to tell someone how she felt about her partner.
Sheila set her purse back down and feeling a little disappointed, leant against the sink unit. It was now apparent that she didn’t stand a chance with the delectable Agent Mulder. Not when this pretty partner of his loved him. She may have been a bit dizzy at times, but she wasn’t stupid and she knew when she was beaten. Given the choice, there was no way he would pick her over his partner. Sheila suspected that there was more to this than met the eye because as far as she was concerned, there was no way that Agent Scully should be this insecure about her position in his life, despite her confession. And it still didn’t explain why she was trying to push her towards Holman.
“Have you told him?”
“I…” Scully trailed off and looked at Sheila. Knowing it was useless even trying to get out of this conversation, she sighed deeply, wiped a hand over her face and shook her head. “No,” she admitted. “No, I haven’t.” She crossed her arms and exhaled a long, slow, breath in an attempt to regain her equilibrium.
“Why?”
Scully looked at her and opened her mouth to answer, but immediately closed it again, unsure of how to answer. Why? That was such a loaded question for just three letters. Why hadn’t she told Mulder how she felt about him? Well, she knew the answer to that straight away; she wasn’t entirely sure that he felt the same. She knew he cared about her, possibly even loved her, but in love with her, the way she was in love with him? She just couldn’t be completely positive and there was no way she was going to open herself up to that kind of heartache if he didn’t love her back. It would ruin everything. Their friendship and partnership would have to end if she told him how she felt and it was unrequited. She couldn’t bear to see the pitying look on his face when he let her down gently. Just thinking about it made her stomach turn.
Sometimes Scully felt as though Mulder saw her as an irritating sister, someone to be tolerated, but he really wanted to ditch her and go and do grown up things with grown up people. She felt as though he had reached his limits when it came to her rationale and scientific rigidity and was becoming exasperated with her refusal to believe. Especially now that his ex was back on the scene and hanging around like a bad smell. Diana was more than happy to believe without question and Mulder seemed relieved to have someone like minded around, who wasn’t going to question every theory he proposed or disregard his beliefs because the science didn’t add up.
It wasn’t that she wasn’t willing to believe in extreme possibilities. She was. She’d proved that she was willing to open herself up to things that may exist outside the laws of science after they had met Cassandra Spender and then the whole Antarctica debacle. But she cared too much for this man to let him open himself up to ridicule. Not if she could disprove his theories with cold, hard, science. If he was going to go public with his beliefs, she wasn’t going to let him do it unless she had the proof to back him up. And when she had that proof, she would be standing right by his side, just like she always had.
“Why? I um…” She shrugged and sighed. “Mulder and I, we… we’re friends,” she eventually answered, realising how ridiculous and weak it sounded.
“But you want more?”
“It doesn’t matter what I want,” Scully replied softly, casting a glance and a sad smile at the woman next to her. “His ex is back on the scene and…” she shook her head, unsure how to even begin to explain exactly the kind of damage that Diana Fowley was doing to her and Mulder. She couldn’t even explain why she was opening up to this woman. “He’s my best friend,” she finished with a small shrug.
“I’ve seen the way that he looks at you though,” Sheila said, standing up, turning to the mirror and pulling out her lipstick from her purse to reapply it. “You don’t look at someone the way he looks at you if you don’t love them. I mean, he’s always touching you. You must see that.”
Scully shifted awkwardly at the realisation that someone had noticed how often Mulder touched her. She knew he touched her a lot, and she him, and she had thought these touches were always subtle enough as to not be noticed by a casual bystander. If Sheila had noticed them, they obviously weren’t being subtle enough. It suddenly occurred to Scully that it was no wonder there were rumours floating around the halls of the Hoover building about them. They didn’t exactly act like they were just partners.
Mulder was always brushing up against her, or touching her elbow or her fingers to catch her attention or standing so close he would have to lean right into her personal space to talk to her. It had become such a regular occurrence that she never even questioned it. She was guilty of invading his personal space herself. And then there was his hand on the base of her spine. That was his spot and it had been since day one. She recalled how someone else had tried to put their hand there once and she had moved away and threw a dirty look in their direction without realising she was doing it. Or if someone else tried to casually touch her, she would glare at them until they removed their hand, annoyed by their audacity to assume that because Mulder did it, that they could too. Thinking back now, she realised just how territorial she was over Mulder and his touches.
Sheila suddenly stopped and looked at Scully as though something had just occurred to her. “Wait. Are you telling me that you two have never…”
“Nope,” admitted Scully with a long sigh. “But doesn’t that apply to you and Holman too? You two have been friends since high school.”
“Yes but…” she trailed off for a second. “Not even a kiss?” Sheila asked in disbelief, amazed when Scully simply shook her head. “Trust me, the man knows how to kiss.” She sighed and looked at her reflection in the mirror. “I just never thought of Holman that way, you know? He’s my closest friend. And to not even suspect…”
A small smile crossed Scully’s lips as she thought about her and Mulder. “Well, it seems to me that the best relationships, the ones that last, are frequently the ones that are rooted in friendship. You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere. And the person who was just a friend is… suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.”
A small smile crossed Sheila’s lips as she thought about all the years she had known Holman. He had been the only constant in her life since… forever. He had been there for her during the best and worst times of her life, from the highest highs to the lowest lows. He had always been there to lend a shoulder when she needed to cry or was there to listen to her.
All of a sudden, she realised that she had taken Holman for granted and that Agent Scully was right. Holman was in love with her. It was the only thing that made sense. He had her back 100%, every single time she needed him. He treated her like a princess and that was all she had ever wanted. Someone who would treat her right and be there for her. Not like the men she had been with in the past. They just wanted her money and when she couldn’t give them what they needed, they found someone else or treated her like dirt. She knew without a doubt that Holman would never treat her with anything but respect and love. He already did.
All of a sudden, she knew what she needed to do.
A wet gurgling sound caught both women’s attention and they both turned to look at the sink units that were all filling up with dirty, foul smelling water from the sewers.
“The storm drains are filling up,” Scully said, backing away from the row of sinks. “We should get out of here.”
Nodding, Sheila followed her out of the bathroom and they both stopped outside in the hallway while Scully pulled out her cellphone.
“Agent Scully?” Sheila waited until the other woman was looking at her before pulling her into a warm hug, much to Scully’s surprise. She hesitantly patted Sheila’s back but couldn’t help the smile that crossed her face. “Thank you.”
“Oh um… you’re welcome?”
“I need to go and find Holman,” she muttered pulling back from Scully and glancing at the brown water that was seeping under the bathroom door. Before she did, she caught Scully’s hand in hers and squeezed it. “Tell Agent Mulder how you feel. I promise you that you won’t be disappointed. When you find true love, you should grab it with both hands and not let it go for anyone.”
Smiling widely, Sheila disappeared through into the gymnasium to find the man she had just realised she was in love with, leaving Scully alone. She watched the blonde walk away and thought about what she’d said as she began to dial the local police departments number. Maybe she would talk to him about how she was feeling.
Maybe she would.