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The MSBY team was at Onigiri Miya. They would go there every once in a while after matches. Either to celebrate a win or to comfort eat when they've lost a match. It was a good day and they won an important match. Everyone was happy.
Osamu's food was really good. Thanks to MSBY he gained a lot more customers over the years.
Drinking and eating with his teammates made Atsumu happy. Atsumu wouldn't want to admit this to anyone, but he was happy that Osamu never went pro. That way nobody could compare their gameplay.
Sitting at the table with his friends and boyfriend just made him be thankful. All those years of being an outsider, being overshadowed by his twin and not being able to find love, were over. This was his time to shine. His time to finally bloom.
Sakusa was never drinking around the MSBY team. He knew someone would have to take care of the idiots and he was the only responsible one. Also he didn’t want to get drunk and possibly tell the team that he loved them (which he did). They wouldn’t leave him alone if those words ever left his mouth.
Saying it to Atsumu was different. Obviously. He was his boyfriend, but even around the team he would tone it down. He didn’t want to be part of that one specific annoying lovey dovey couple. Atsumu knew that and respected his boyfriend's decision. After all he would tell and show his love towards the blonde setter in private.
"Aren't ya coming, Omi?", Atsumu asked his boyfriend, as the team got up to leave.
"I'm going to help Osamu clean up. You go wait in my car okay?"
"Lemme help ya." Atsumu stumbled towards his brother. "Oops."
Osamu sighed. "Yer too drunk, Tsumu. Yer gonna drop plates, listen to Sakusa and wait in the car. I'll see ya around."
Atsumu was brought to Sakusa's car, which was parked right outside of Onigiri Miya. He waited in the passenger seat as his boyfriend helped Osamu clean up a little. But drunk Atsumu was getting bored in the car, so he got out and looked inside the restaurant. The lights were on but no one was there.
He got curious and walked back inside. No one at the tables. It was empty and silent. He was about to enter the kitchen, but stopped. He could see Osamu and Sakusa through the glass window on the door.
The blonde setter was staring at them, suddenly feeling very sober. He knew what he was seeing was real. It wasn’t just a hallucination. It really was his twin brother and boyfriend kissing. Also not for just a second, they kept going. So Atsumu did himself a favor and left silently. He got back into Sakusa's car and waited.
He would’ve loved to just leave on his own, but he wanted to see if his boyfriend would tell him what happened. He wanted to know, how Sakusa would act. After all, none of them knew that Atsumu saw. Atsumu was hoping for Sakusa to be honest towards him and just tell him what happened.
Sakusa and Atsumu have been together for a few months. It started out slow, since both of them were kind of 'allergic' to love. But as they got to know each other better, they slowly got close. It was a dream come true for Atsumu. Someone who liked him for who he was. Someone who really cared for him. Someone that Osamu couldn’t steal before Atsumu got his chance.
So he thought.
A few minutes later, Sakusa came back. He got in the car and started driving to his place. His apartment just was closer to Onigiri Miya.
"How are you feeling, Atsu?"
Hurt. "Mhm fine. What'd take so long?"
He was looking at Sakusa; lips plump, cheeks flushed and hair a mess.
"Oh, we just got caught up talking." It was obvious to Atsumu, that Sakusa was avoiding to look at him.
"Uh huh. What were ya talking about?" Atsumu was staring at Sakusa, trying to read his face.
"Just thanked him for the food and all that. Nothing important."
Atsumu stood silent. He turned his head and was looking out of the window, trying not to tear up.
He lied to me. He didn’t tell me what happened. He couldn’t even look at me.
As they arrived at Sakusa's apartment, they both walked back to Sakusa's bedroom. Atsumu would’ve wanted to sleep on the couch or the guest room, but he didn’t want to be suspicious. After all, Sakusa didn’t know that Atsumu saw.
They both changed into their pajamas, brushed their teeth and went to bed. Atsumu was the little spoon, which he usually liked. He felt safe in Sakusa's arms, as if no one could harm him in any way. Ironic that the person that those arms belong to, hurt him. Partially.
The two closest people to the setter hurt him. The two people that usually would make him so happy. His twin brother who he grew up with. His boyfriend who he took so long for to get together with.
It's always the ones, that make you happy, that are able to hurt you the most.
Atsumu didn’t sleep one bit. He felt weird in Sakusa's arms. He was crying silently, being cautious about Sakusa. For all he knew, he could’ve been up too.
Atsumu was still awake when the sun was rising. Sakusa's arms no longer around him. He took the chance and got out of bed. Some of Atsumu's stuff was ironed and folded on Sakusa's drawer. It's just clothes he left there some time. So he changed into them and left the apartment.
He made an instant decision, called an Uber and drove over to Osamu's. He couldn’t yet confront Sakusa. He would know that something was up the moment he would wake up anyways. Also Atsumu kind of wanted him to freak out a little. That’s how hurt he was.
It was still very early, but Atsumu didn’t care. He was ringing Osamu's doorbell nonstop until he opened the door. Osamu just woke up, everyone could tell. His hair was a mess and he was wearing a shirt and boxers only. His eyes were barely open, but when he saw Atsumu, they widened.
"What's yer problem? Can't ring the door like a normal person, can ya?"
Atsumu chuckled and just walked in. He found his way to the living room and sat down on the couch. Osamu nervously shut the door and followed his brother.
"Hello?"
"Do you want me to tell ya, why I didn’t tell you about Omi and I right away?" Osamu froze. He didn’t expect that question. "You probably know anyways, don’t ya?"
Osamu didn’t plan on telling Atsumu. Even if he wanted to, his mouth wouldn't let him. He felt embarrassed.
"What're ya talking 'bout?"
Atsumu cleared his throat. "First year of high school. I told ya I liked Rin and you kissed him." The blonde was staring at his brother, whose gaze was lowered to the ground. "Second year of high school. I told ya I wanna ask out Kita-san and you asked him out first."
It was silent. Osamu didn’t dare to even talk or look at his brother. He has never felt this embarrassed before.
"Last night. You and my boyfriend kissed." Atsumu chuckled sarcastically. "My twin brother and my boyfriend kissed. Now how the fuck did that even happen? He was just helpin' ya clean up. Please enlighten me, my dearest brother."
The way Atsumu was talking may have sounded harsh, but he actually was on the verge of tears.
"Tell me, how was my brother even able to do that to me? Back in high school I brushed it off, since I never was in a relationship with them. But this was my fucking boyfriend we're talking about. This was just too much. I… I never expected you to go this far."
"Tsumu… please listen." Osamu slowly lifted his head to look at Atsumu. He could see the tears that haven’t left his brothers eyes yet. "I… I don’t know how it happened okay? We were just cleaning up and… and the next moment we were kissing."
"You don’t know???" Tears started falling as Atsumu got up. "How do you not know? Ya kissed my boyfriend. How do you not know how that happened? Didn’t you think about me and my feelings? Hmm???"
Osamu had no answer to that.
Atsumu walked closer to his brother.
"Don’t I deserve to be happy? Why do you always choose to hurt me? Why are you taking advantage of the power of me liking you? I couldn’t have this one thing that was so important to me?"
"I'm sorry, Tsumu…", Osamu said quietly. "I didn’t mean to, I swear."
"Don’t even try, Osamu." Atsumu stepped back. "I don’t wanna see ya for a while. Please don’t contact me." Then Atsumu turned around and walked to the door.
"Tsumu please." He had followed him and grabbed him by his wrist. "Don’t say that. You have to believe me, I'm truly sorry. I don’t wanna fight with you like this."
Atsumu pulled his hand back. "I'm not fighting; I simply want to be left alone."
Without looking back, he left his brothers apartment. Tears kept streaming down his face as he stepped outside the building. He didn’t know where to go.
There was no one he would want to go to at the moment. He thought about visiting Kita, but he didn’t want to tell anyone what he saw. Not everyone needs to know. He also didn’t want to confront Sakusa just yet.
He was walking through the city for a long while. He got a coffee at some random coffee shop so he would stay up. His phone kept buzzing in his pocket, so he turned it off. It was Sakusa. He was worried sick and he had talked to Osamu too.
"He saw… it?" Sakusa was in shock. Atsumu seemed a little different to him last night, but he blamed the alcohol. "We fucked up, Osamu. Big time." He was stress-walking in his apartment.
"No shit, Sherlock. I don’t even know how to fix this. I've never seen him like that before, it was terrible."
"This is all your fault! Why did you have to kiss me?"
"What??? It takes two to kiss, ya know? You kissed me back, don’t even blame only me!"
"Whatever… I need to find your brother. He turned off his phone." Sakusa sighed. He felt terrible and guilty. The kiss didn’t mean anything to him, but would Atsumu even care anymore?
Meanwhile Atsumu's feet brought him to Rainbow Bridge in Tokyo. He knew exactly why he was there, but now it just hurt. He leaned against the railing and was staring down at the water. He finished his coffee a while ago.
Why would they even do that to me? Is it my personality? Did they do it to get back at me for being so annoying? Or do they actually like each other? What if Omi just used me to get with Osamu…
Many thoughts were buzzing around in his mind. He was silently crying; face buried in is arms which were crossed on the railing.
This is so unfair. Why always me?
All of a sudden, someone patted Atsumu's shoulder. He flinched and looked up immediately. His eyes and nose were read, he looked a mess. When he saw the person next to im, he turned his head and stared down at the water again.
"How'd ya find me?"
Sakusa remained in the same position. "This is our spot, isn’t it?" He moved Atsumu's arm a little aside and exposed an inscription. A sloppily written 'A+K' on the railing.
"So I thought…" He stared down at the inscription. "Maybe not anymore", Atsumu quietly said.
"What? Atsumu please… can we talk?"
Atsumu shrugged. "Is what yer gonna say any different from what Osamu said?" Sakusa remained silent. "Where ya just cleaning up and the next moment y'all were kissing? Is that what happened?"
"No! No… It… I really don’t know how it happened, okay? But I swear, it didn’t mean anything to me. Tsumu you have to believe me, please." Sakusa was holding on to Atsumu's arm.
"If you have no feelings towards him, then it shouldn’t have happened in the first place. You… were you even gonna tell me about it? Since you didn’t do it last night. Since you literally lied to my face."
Atsumu was tearing up again.
"How could you do that to me, Omi? You knew how I was feeling about Osamu and the people that I like. I told you about it. I told you everything about it. You… you two used my insecurity against me."
Tears were streaming; people were looking at them weirdly.
"I am so sorry, Tsumu…" Sakusa was staring at where his hand was gripping onto Atsumu.
"That doesn’t fix it, y'know? You did this to me, when you were unlucky with dating before too. Out of all people you should know best how I feel at the moment." He pulled his arm away from Sakusa. "I would’ve never thought, that you were able to do this to me. You fucking hurt me."
"Let me fix it, please! I don’t want to lose you, Atsu… I'll do anything, just please stay."
Atsumu shook his head, taking a few steps back and wiping his tears.
"I can't trust you anymore."
"Don’t say that…" Sakusa was tearing up. "Please… I love you, Atsu."
"Not enough, Omi. Because if you truly did, this wouldn’t have happened." Atsumu put his hands in the pocket of his hoodie. "See ya at practice, I guess."
He turned around and walked away. Sakusa was silently crying by himself. He wanted to follow Atsumu, but he felt like, it wouldn’t change a thing.
He fucked up big time.
The next days at practice were weird. Everyone could tell that something was up between the only pair within MSBY. Nobody dared to ask any of them. Atsumu was always staying at the gym after practice. Sometimes the coach would come back hours after practice and would find Atsumu serving.
Just when Atsumu was kind of getting better, Christmas came around. He knew he would have to see Osamu since both of them would go back home over the holidays. Atsumu really wanted to ditch, but he couldn’t. Also, he was missing his parents.
Meanwhile the team had figured, that Atsumu and Sakusa had broken up.
It was weird for everyone but eventually they got used to it. But nor Atsumu, neither Sakusa went back to Onigiri Miya after that night. Even if the team was going, they both would just head home.
It was at New Year's Eve where Atsumu and Osamu really talked again.
"Can we talk for a moment? Please?" Osamu was nervously staring at his brother.
"I'm not up for yer shit right now."
"Okay, then just listen to me." Atsumu didn’t react, he was staring out of the window. "I know you don’t want anything to do with me at the moment. That’s understandable. But can we please start talking again? I really miss you, Tsumu. I need you. I'm so sorry for what I did. I regret it so much, you have no idea."
"That doesn’t change the fact, that it happened. You knew it would hurt me and did it anyway", Atsumu said quietly. "You hurt me so much."
"I know and I don’t deserve your forgiveness. But what can I do to make it better? We are brothers after all, I don’t wanna go my whole life without talking to you. I don’t think I can do that."
Atsumu sighed. "I don’t know, Samu." He turned to look at his brother. "I don’t fucking know! I lost two of the most important people in my life in one day. There isn’t a way to make this better."
"Will you hate me yer whole life now? Because if you do, I'll understand…"
"I don’t hate you…" Atsumu's voice was even more quiet now. "I'm just disappointed."
Atsumu knew he was going to tear up, so he just left the room. Nonetheless, the start into the new year wasn’t the best. But Atsumu had a lot to think about.
It was a grey day in Tokyo. Atsumu had gone for a walk as it started to rain. He didn’t bring an umbrella, only his hoodie was kind of saving him from the rain. But it didn’t take long and he was drenched in rain water. It was a coincidence that he walked by Onigiri Miya.
Or maybe his feet took him there.
It's been a few months since he last was there.
He walked in while Osamu was busy.
"I'm sorry, we're clos-" Osamu froze when he looked up and saw his brother. All of a sudden, he became very nervous.
"I know, sorry. I just… I don’t know, my feet kinda brought me here."
Osamu was staring at Atsumu. "That's fine. Do ya maybe need some fresh clothes? I've got some in the back." Atsumu just nodded and watched as Osamu went in the back and brought dry clothes for his brother. Atsumu went to the bathroom to change, which gave Osamu some time to think.
He was happy, his brother came by. He missed him. It has been a while since they last saw each other. The longest, they haven’t seen or talked to each other.
When Atsumu came back, Osamu was preparing some food.
"Thanks. Uhm, can ya maybe give me a ride home?"
"Of course. Let me just get this wrapped up, then we can leave."
Atsumu waited at a table for his brother to finish up. It was silent in the whole restaurant. All you could hear was Osamu cleaning up. After a good fifteen minutes, they both got into Osamu's car.
"Can I be honest with ya?", Osamu asked.
"Yeah."
"I've missed ya a lot. I'm happy your feet brought you to my restaurant tonight."
No answer, just some more silence.
"Now can I be honest with ya?" Atsumu was looking out of the window.
"Yeah, of course."
"I'm happy my feet brought me to you tonight too." He looked over at Osamu and smiled just a little.
Osamu also smiled.
They didn’t talk the rest of the ride. When they arrived at Atsumu's apartment complex, Osamu handed Atsumu a paper bag. He had prepared some of Atsumu's favorite as takeaway. The blonde thanked his brother and went inside the building.
Even though they barely talked, everything seemed to be getting back to normal again.
It was the day after. The sun was setting and Atsumu was just on his phone. It was when he came across a video of best friends. They were sharing locations with each other, so they would always know where the other is.
Atsumu and Sakusa did the same thing, just as lovers.
Did he ever turn it off?
Atsumu went to check.
He didn’t.
Sakusa wasn't home. Atsumu zoomed in to see where exactly he was. As he recognized the location, he got his jacket, got up and made his way to the location. It took him about half an hour and he kept checking if Sakusa was still there. Luckily he was.
Atsumu walked closer to the dark-haired man. Sakusa hasn't noticed Atsumu yet. He just stepped next to him and leaned against the railing. That was when Sakusa noticed him.
"Atsumu…"
Atsumu smiled a little.
"Hey."