Work Text:
The Child – A Deep Space Nine fanfic
By Ash (aka Little Tanuki)
Dramatis Personae:
Bashir, a doctor.
The Child, a disembodied voice, age approximately six years.
(Darkness. As if from nowhere, a small and childish voice breaks the silence.)
Child: Hello? Hello? Where am I? Is anyone there? Please – I want… I want… It’s dark. Everybody’s gone. Can you help me?
Bashir: (As if just waking up) What? Who is this? Are you in my quarters? Wait. Computer, lights.
(The lights stay off.)
What’s wrong with you? I said lights!
Child: I don’t know.
Bashir: Oh. Er… Well you really shouldn’t be here. This is my private space. You ought to be at home with your parents. Computer!
(The computer offers no response.)
Child: What’s Computer?
Bashir: What do you mean?
Child: Don’t know. Does Computer make the lights go on?
Bashir: Ideally.
Child: Oh. I can do that.
(Lights come on. Bashir is suddenly visible. The Child is not.)
Bashir: Wait. How…?
Child: Don’t know. Don’t know anything. (Starting to panic.) It’s still dark. Why can’t I see?
Bashir: Calm down. You’re all right.
Child: Help me!
Bashir: I will. If there’s anything I can do, I promise, I’ll help.
Child: Really?
Bashir: Of course. But first I need to know what we’re dealing with. What can you tell me?
Child: It’s dark.
Bashir: So I understand. Can you see anything? Anything at all?
Child: No! Everyone’s gone. I can’t find them…
Bashir: You’re by yourself, then? Are you in danger?
Child: I don’t know. I don’t know anything, except there used to be lots of other people. But they’re gone. I think I ran away. Those men – they wanted me to disappear like everybody else. (Voice rising frantically.) Why’d they have to come? Why’d they hate us so much?
Bashir: It’s all right – take your time. You don’t have to tell me everything at once. Let’s try something else. Do you have a name?
Child: What’s that?
Bashir: You don’t know what a name is? What do people call you?
Child: Nothing. They all gone away.
Bashir: What did they call you, then?
Child: 56231-alpha.
Bashir: That’s it? That’s your name?
Child: 56231-alpha.
Bashir: Are you sure? I can’t just go around calling you “56231-alpha.” Isn’t there something…?
Child: Might be… Maybe. Someone, long time ago… They – I think they called me Uul.
Bashir: Uul, then. It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Doctor Bashir. Julian.
Child: I know.
Bashir: You do? How?
Child: The others. They said I should find you if I was ever in trouble. And then the bad men came. So I ran away…
Bashir: You’ve obviously made it this far at least. That’s something. If you stay put, there’s a chance we could find you. I just need to know more. What can you tell me about your surroundings? Can you see anything? Anything at all might help.
Child: I told you, it’s dark!
Bashir: Then can you hear anything? Smell? Sense?
Child: It’s a big place. Cold. But not like a room. I don’t… I don’t think it’s a room. When I reach out like this, my… arm? My arm. It goes all the way, like it’s really long. Like string. You think that’s how I made the lights go on?
Bashir: Yes, that was strange. How do you think it happened?
Child: You said “lights” and I made them go on.
Bashir: …Which can only mean that you’ve somehow gained access to the station controls. You’re clearly talking to me via some sort of interface. How is that possible, if you don’t even know what a computer is?
Child: I don’t… I…
Bashir: I know it’s difficult. I don’t mean to alarm you. But even the tiniest detail – it doesn’t matter if it seems important – anything you remember could provide a missing clue as to who, what… even where you are. If I know that, I can help you. Are you anywhere near…? No, not a computer. A communications console. Wait, let me guess. You don’t know what that is either. Are you sure you can’t see anything in front of you? It would look like a large panel, covered in lights. Nothing at all like that?
Child: No.
Bashir: No switches nearby? Not even a viewscreen?
Child: No.
Bashir: Then how could you have known when the lights came on in my quarters?
Child: Don’t know. Just did.
Bashir: Then what if… It’s a mad idea. Purely insane. But don’t be alarmed. Tell me… You sound human. But I don’t believe you are. Are you?
Child: Why?
Bashir: It’s the only explanation I can think of. You clearly have access to our computer, but you don’t know what one is. You say you can’t see anything, but you control the lights, which means you must have some innate knowledge of these old Cardassian systems. You don’t suppose you might actually be inside?
Child: Inside what?
Bashir: The computer. It would explain a lot.
Child: Yeah but… what’s that got to do with anything?
Bashir: Please, don’t panic. I promise this is more than just idle speculation. I have got to find out where you are if we’re to help you at all, and for that, I have to look to the available evidence. I’m increasingly coming to suspect this may be more of a mechanical problem than a biological one. You sound human, but I’m far from convinced that you are. What if I were to call my friend? He’s better with computers than anyone I’ve ever known. One of the best engineers in Starfleet…
Child: No.
Bashir: No?
Child: No engineers.
Bashir: Why ever not?
Child: Was engineers came to take us, after the bad men. They never took me. But the others – they’re all gone. You don’t understand!
Bashir: I think I’m beginning to. But my friend isn’t like those… “bad” men. He…
Child: No! No engineers!
(The lights flicker dangerously.)
Bashir: Fine. No engineers. But if I am going to help you properly, I will need to know a lot more than you’ve told me.
Child: Like what?
Bashir: Start at the beginning. Our Security Chief would say that even the slightest detail might be important. For example, where are you running from? You must have some idea, even if you don’t know what it means. A colour, sound, a name?
Child: Adigeon.
Bashir: What?
Child: I think it’s a place. My father took me there, to make me better.
Bashir: It is. It’s a planet. Adigeon Prime. But how could you have come from there, of all places? That can’t just be a co-incidence.
Child: Did I say something wrong?
Bashir: Yes… No… Possibly. But it’s not you. At least, I think it’s not.
Child: But it’s true. You will help, won’t you?
Bashir: I’m not sure that I can.
Child: But you promised.
Bashir: I remember. But I’m a doctor. I deal with biological illness, not machines.
Child: Why you keep saying I’m a machine?
Bashir: Because, like I said, you’re inside our computer. It doesn’t mean I won’t try to help you. It’s just that we may have to approach this from a different angle. That’s all.
Child: You have to help. There’s no-one else. The ones in the hospital, they didn’t want us anymore. That’s why I hid. I made myself very small, like… like a speck. Like a little tiny speck hid all the way in the darkest hole. I found the bad men’s ship, and when they stopped here, I heard that you were inside. I had to find you. Don’t know why.
Bashir: And you say you came from Adigeon.
Child: It was because we’re different, wasn’t it? Father always said I’m not like other kids. You think that’s why the bad men came?
Bashir: The question is, why would you come to me? What would you have been doing on Adigeon Prime?
Child: Don’t know. But I remember things when I’m with you. We went there in a starship, Father and me. The rooms were yellow. Our cabin had a real long scratch on the wall near my bed, all ziggy and zaggy like teeth. Sharp teeth.
Bashir: Sharp teeth…
Child: Wasn’t scared or nothing. It was only a little scratch in the wall. Father said…
Bashir: …He said that the ship was old, but it was safe. There was nothing to be scared of, and it wouldn’t be a real adventure if we took a proper Federation ship, from a proper space port. No – surely not.
Child: And have you seen my teddy? Father said I could take him with me. He’s all brown and floppy and falling to bits, but I sew him up real good to make him better. I like making things better.
Bashir: And every time he falls apart, you sew him up a little more. People at your school say you’re too old to play with stupid toys. Sometimes they laugh. They call you backward. Sometimes you catch a look in your father’s eyes, and know that you’ll always be a disappointment to him. Not subnormal, exactly. Just not entirely… right. But your mother says to pay no heed to the others in your class, the ones who leave you behind because you’ve always been too slow to understand their games. She says there’ll be a place for you eventually. She says that you have healing hands.
Child: How’d you know all that?
Bashir: Because that was my life. I know what you are. My God, they really did it.
Child: Did what?
Bashir: They took my memory engrams.
Child: What’s men… What’s menomy engumms?
Bashir: (Ignores the Child.) I remember. We were at the hospital, on Adigeon Prime. There was a room at the far end of the hall. The doctors took me there before they started their treatments. Before they changed me. Father followed us as far as the door, but he wasn’t permitted to enter. Then the doctors… they hooked me up to some kind of machine. Fixed a helmet to my head with sensors attached. I can see it in my dreams, sometimes. Was that what they did to me? Extracted what there was of Jules Bashir, in order to create you – Uul? Jules. And you just happened to come here of all places? You’re nothing but a computer construct. You’re me.
Child: Liar. I’m not you. I’m me. You promised you’d help.
Bashir: I’m not sure I…
Child: You did. You promised. Those bad men will be here soon. They’ll find me and delete me, like all the others. It’s dark in here. I’m scared.
Bashir: No – I can’t. There’s nothing I can do. This is… I can’t believe my parents would ever have condoned something like this… What am I saying? Of course they would. This has Father’s signature all over it.
Child: Father?
Bashir: My father. I’m sure you think you’re very real, but there’s no way you could be.
Child: Why not?
Bashir: You’re a programme in a computer. A collection of algorithms. Someone else’s… my – my – memories. Two people can’t have the same life.
(A pause.)
Child: I don’t understand.
Bashir: I’m saying… I don’t know what I’m saying.
Child: I’m not real?
Bashir: Honestly? No.
Child: Because I don’t have a body.
Bashir: That’s part of it.
Child: You could find me a body.
Bashir: What?
Child: You could do it, couldn’t you? You can do anything. You’re so much smarterer than I am.
Bashir: But how – why – would I ever agree to something so momentous? Do you have any idea what that would mean?
Child: I know. I’d be real, like you. All you got to do is take what’s me out of… out of Computer. And put it in another Computer. But you can find one that’s shaped like a body.
Bashir: Impossible. What would you be if I helped you into the physical world? Who would I say you are, if people were to ask? And what would I be? You have to understand. Humans… Our lives are our own. Without that, we’d be in constant danger of losing ourselves. This is just too much. I’m sorry, I can’t help you. Computer. Delete…
Child: What are you doing?
Bashir: Computer…
(He stops, unable to continue.)
Child: Please don’t! You promised! I don’t want to be in the dark. I want to be real. I’m me. I’m me. I’m me…
Fin