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"I still don't like this," Serana said firmly, grasping your hands. You felt the same way, to be honest.
Mercer had asked you to go after Karliah with him. The problem with that, was that you would just as soon do this alone, or if possible with Serana. Mercer gave you weird vibes, and you didn't like talking to him longer than you needed to. Now, though? He wanted you to go into a crypt alone with him, not allowing Serana to accompany you two? Something was up.
"Can you two get your goodbyes over with soon?" Mercer complained, "Karliah could very well get away if we don't hurry."
You rolled your eyes at him, not that he could see it under your mask. You didn't feel the need to wear your sneaking outfit for this job, as you felt like you would be doing more fighting than anything. You felt Serana squeeze your hands again, bringing you back to reality.
"I'll be fine," You reassured her, wishing you could give her a peck on the forehead, but your mask was in the way.
She bit her lip. You worried she would bite through her skin and bleed for a moment before you remembered she had been human for a few weeks, now. It seemed like she forgot sometimes too, though. She would always wear her hood outside even though she didn't need to, and remark on the presence of the sun like it still mattered. It must take a while to get used to being human after centuries as a vampire.
The thought of being able to grow old with Serana did make you giddy with excitement, though. You had considered becoming a vampire just to be able to stay by Serana's side, but you just couldn't force yourself to give up being a werewolf, though you rarely transformed. Either way, you were happy she had agreed to becoming human.
"Just..." Serana looked away for a second, "Just be careful, okay?"
You nodded and gave Serana a quick hug before leaving with Mercer. As you were walking away, you turned and blew a kiss at Serana. Right before the door shut, you could see her pretend to catch it for you.
By the eight, you loved her.
_
The world felt like it was spinning, though you were laying still. You drifted in and out of consciousness, the wound left by Mercer and the wound left by Karliah both throbbing in unison. Until they weren't. The pain was suddenly gone, and so was all other sensation.
You wondered if you had died. If this was death, everyone had lied to you. This was not a beautiful and peaceful afterlife. This was a dark void, endless and timeless.
What a sad death for someone like you, the Dragonborn, the Listener, the Harbringer, dead on the ground of some dusty crypt because of just some guy. Laying here on the ground, covered in dirt and your own blood and probably some of Mercer's blood as well. And all alone, no less.
There was a jostling, suddenly, and if you had any strength you would have lashed out. As it was, though, you had no choice but to allow anything that happened. You still could feel nothing, no pain, floating outside your body though now you knew you weren't dead. That was good news, at least.
You sensed rather than felt hands along your body, bandaging your wounds. Suddenly, there was yelling overhead, and you felt yourself being jostled yet again, being suddenly jerked to one side.
"-fuck did you do...!"
"Calm down-"
"...will not...! Why shouldn't I kill you right now...!"
You were able to catch bits and pieces of the conversation (if it could even be called that) above you, but the sudden movement of your body had jostled your wounds, the pain piercing through the numbness, and you drifted into unconsciousness once more.
The next time you woke up, your wounds were throbbing dully. You felt panic course through your veins. How in oblivion did you survive? You jolted straight up, immediately regretting it and nearly passing out again. Possibly reopening your wounds as well, as you could feel a small wet spot begin to form on your stomach.
"You're awake...!" it was only then that you realized you hadn't been laying on the ground. You had been laying in Serana's lap, the person currently trying to soothe you into laying back down.
"Good to see you survived," someone else said, somewhere you couldn't see without tilting your head, which Serana would not let you do.
She grabbed at your face and forced you to look up at her, eyes boring right into yours. The rims of her eyes looked redder than usual. You were laying in her lap, head resting on her thighs. At some point, someone had taken your mask off.
You would reach up, caress her cheek, hug her, something, but the world was spinning and you felt like you were going to throw up. So instead, you shut your eyes tightly and tried to curl into a ball.
"Look what you did!" you heard Serana exclaim above you, "And we're supposed to trust you?"
"She lived because of me, didn't she?" said the other voice. It must be Karliah, you thought, her voice was distinctly familiar.
You fought the urge to cover your ears as well. You buried your face in Serana's lap, biting the inside of your cheek so hard you were afraid it would bleed. Anything to get rid of the multitude of sensations assaulting you, the dull ache of your partially-healed wounds to the pounding of your headache, the uneasiness in your stomach and the thundering of Serana's voice in your sensitive ears. A few involuntary tears leaked out of your eyes, and you hoped you didn't get Serana's clothes wet.
"She wouldn't even have gone in there if it weren't for you," Serana snarled, cradling your head as close to her body as she could get it. You were already grasping onto her clothes, trying to keep yourself from clawing at your skin to distract from the pain you felt. Did neither of them know any healing spells? Have any healing potions?
"I am not your enemy here," Karliah replied calmly, "I already told you, I spent years perfecting that poison to use on Mercer and instead I chose to use it to save your friend here. Are you so intent on punishing the wrong person you can't even see who the real villain is here?"
That was news to you. It still hurt being shot by an arrow, though. Not as much as it had hurt to be stabbed in the stomach.
Serana nervously ran her fingers through your hair, to calm you or herself you didn't know. You did find yourself relaxing into her touch, loosening your grip on her clothes and relaxing your muscles.
"Serana," your voice was rough and ragged, "Did you see any health potions in my bag?"
Serana immediately tried to get up to search your bag, seemingly forgetting you were on her lap in her haste. The jostling of your head sent a spike of pain behind your eyes. You tried to stifle a noise of pain so Serana wouldn't feel guilty, but couldn't stop yourself from curling up even further, impulsively grabbing at your head.
"I'll check," Karliah said. There was a rustling sound from where she had been, hopefully her checking your bag. Serana's hands returned to your hair, gentler than her stressed movements from before. You relaxed into her touch.
"Looks like Mercer took them all out of your bag before he left," Karliah said, sounding disgruntled. Like it was a minor inconvenience.
"Evil bastard," Serana snarled, her fingers tightening in your hair before immediately loosening.
"Then do you know any healing spells?" you asked, desperate to make your pain go away.
"Don't you think we would have healed you if that was the case?" Karliah huffed, "The nearest town is still far away, and we needed to make sure you were okay before either of us went."
"Well, she's okay," Serana said defensively, "So why don't you go to Winterhold and get her a potion?"
"In case you forgot, I'm a wanted woman. I can't just waltz into a town and buy potions. Plus, in Winterhold, the best place to buy potions is the college. I don't have access."
"So you suggest I leave her here alone with you? Who shot her with a poisoned arrow?" Serana scoffed. If there was one thing Serana was good at, you thought mildly, it was being mad.
You knew healing spells. If you could concentrate for long enough, you may be able to heal yourself. However, right now you could hardly concentrate on Serana and Karliah's voices, let alone trying not to throw up.
Karliah pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration, "We've talked about this! Without me she'd be dead. It has to be you who buys the potions whether you like it or not. Either you buy the potions, or she heals naturally."
Serana growled softly, her hands moving to cradle your body closer to hers. Truth be told, you didn't want to be alone with Karliah, either. You didn't know her, didn't trust her well enough to be alone with her.
On the other hand, though, you knew what it was like to have a bounty on your head. Guards swarming around you the moment you step into town, no matter how sneaky you think you're being. It might be better for Serana to go, though you hate to admit it.
"Serana..." you croaked, "It'll be okay. It shouldn't take more than a few hours if you're fast."
Serana bit her lip, obviously fighting with herself. You were now mostly in her lap, head resting on her chest. Karliah crossed her arms.
"Fine," Serana said finally, "But if I find out you touched so much as a hair on her head, I really will kill you."
Serana gave you a kiss on the forehead before she left, letting you know she's be back as quickly as she could. She took Shadowmere and broke into a gallop, and soon she was gone.
You relaxed back into the sleeproll Serana and Karliah had put you in, the coldness of the air beginning to seep into you now without Serana to keep you warm. Your beastblood did help with this a little, but being a werewolf wouldn't save you from frostbite. Now that Serana was gone and you didn't need to stay awake to keep her from worrying too much, you wanted to sleep. Your head wouldn't stop pounding and the pain in your stab wound was much sharper now that you had moved around.
"She tried to kill me, you know," Karliah said suddenly, nearly making you jump.
"You tried to kill me, so," You replied, willing her to shut up so you could sleep.
"I didn't," Karliah sounded exhausted, "Mercer did. Either way, I was trying to bandage you up, and she came out of nowhere and snatched you out of my hands. She tried to attack me, and only stopped when I threatened you."
"You threatened me?" you asked incredulously.
"It was the only way to get her to stop attacking me."
You weren't sure why she was telling you all this. You tried to tune her out and fall asleep.
"I'm just saying you're lucky to have a friend who's willing to go so far for you. She went ballistic when I held that knife to your throat."
You barked out a laugh at the word "friend", which you immediately regretted as you could feel your bandage getting slightly wetter. You ignored the bit about Karliah holding a knife to your throat.
"Is that what we seem like?" you replied, amused, "Friends?"
"Hmm," Karliah hummed, "Perhaps not."
She was quiet after that, thankfully. Any worries that you were in too much pain to fall asleep quickly went away as you fell asleep soon after Karliah stopped talking, drifting into a blissful numbness.
_
The next time you woke up, it was to Serana gently lifting your head and pressing a healing potion to your lips, urging you to drink it. The bitter taste made you want to spit it back up. The immediate relief of your headache and the feel of torn skin closing made you drink the whole thing, though.
Within minutes you were able to sit up, Serana fussing over you and making sure you didn't have any lingering scars. It looked like since you took so long to drink a healing potion, it would leave a faint scar. Serana was more upset about this than you were. Scars were hot, right?
Soon after you were able to be up and at it on your own, Karliah explained to you the next steps you needed to take in order to get rid of Mercer. It sounded long and tedious, and not like something you would do right away. At present, you wanted to go back to your manor (which took forever to build and was super expensive, and even if it isn't as good as your Solitude house you're going to live there) and take a nap.
While you were leaving, though, you noticed Serana acting a little different. Quieter than usual, way less complaining. Usually she would have made one or two remarks about the weather by now at least, if not a bunch of complaining about how much she disliked Karliah or, more likely, how much she disliked Mercer.
"Are you okay?" you asked her. You hadn't put your mask back on, there was no reason to. It was stored safely in your bag, along with the healing potions Serana had bought. With your money, you were pretty sure, but still.
Serana didn't answer you immediately, just looking away and biting her lip again. You wished she would stop doing that. Even if she was human now, it was still bad for her.
"I just keep thinking..." Serana began, but stopped talking. She looked nervous and upset. You weren't sure why she would be acting like this.
"It's stupid," Serana finally muttered.
"No, tell me," you encouraged her, now more curiosity than anything.
"I just keep thinking, if I insisted on going with you, if I had barged in instead of just waiting outside, maybe..."
"Serana, you have to know this isn't your fault," you said, grasping her hands.
"I do know that," Serana replied, "But could I have prevented it? I just keep thinking about when I first saw you, covered in blood and being carried around by a stranger... And then she threatened you! And she expects us to trust her?"
You didn't reply, just enveloped Serana in a tight hug. She tentatively returned it, arms gently wrapping around you, as though you were still hurt.
"I don't know," Serana said finally, "I know its not rational. I just keep thinking about it. Like, what if I was still a vampire? Could I have stopped it then?"
"No?" you replied, "Serana, I'm pretty sure Mercer locked the door behind him and he wasn't going to let you come with us no matter what. He hd planned to kill me from the start. But! Now we have a chance to kill him right back."
"Can't wait," replied Serana with a glint of teeth.
"Come on, don't you want to get some sweetrolls together? Fuck Mercer, forget him!" you held Serana's hand in your own, swinging your joined arms as you walked.
"Now that I can actually eat them? Of course."