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“Teddy?”
“Mhm?”
“Why are there two of you?”
“There’s three of you so I win.”
“There used to be two of me.”
“Nah, there’s definitely three of you.”
Arizona rolled over slightly to glare at Teddy, her hat falling off her head. “I think we need to call Callie.”
“She’s gonna kill us.”
“It’s not that cold out. We just had a little bump to the head.”
“And about half a bottle of gin each,” Teddy pointed out, her words surprisingly coherent, one hand flopping towards Arizona, but landing short in the snow. “Cold, cold, cold.” Teddy tried to stand up, but lost her balance, falling on top of Arizona. “Ow.”
“Why’re you saying ow, you’re the one who fell on top of me!”
“You have pointy knees!”
“Okay, we can do this. You need to get off of me and then we’re gonna get up this hill and maybe we should call Karev or Yang or someone. We could definitely bribe them with surgeries to keep this,” Arizona waved a hand at their matching bruised heads. “A secret from Callie.”
Teddy rolled off, finally managing to stand to her feet. She offered a hand to Arizona. Teddy squinted at Arizona’s head. “Callie’s totally gonna notice that you have a huge bruise on your head.”
“This is all your fault. You were the one who was all excited about snow,” groaned Arizona as she and Teddy started trudging up the hill.
“You’re the one who found the sled and suggested we go sledding!” Teddy shot back, leaning against Arizona for support.
“You brought gin. I just wanted to have wine. But nooo, Teddy has to have gin.” Arizona clung to Teddy’s arm. “You’re like a freakin’ twig.”
“Rude!” Teddy reached down to toss a handful of snow at Arizona, but managed only to scoop it into her own face. She spluttered out a mouthful of snow.
Arizona doubled over in laughter. “Ha, you’re a polar bear!”
“Doesn’t even make sense,” Teddy grumbled, scraping snow off her face.
“It does too! You’re Teddy, like teddy bear and now you’re all snowy like a polar bear.”
“You’re an idiot. You’re a penguin then!”
Arizona smacked Teddy on the arm. “That makes no sense.”
“Robin, like a bird, and penguins are snow birds.”
They started walking up the hill again, Teddy still picking snow off her collar.
“That’s stupid.”
Teddy poked her tongue out as they crested the top of the hill. “You’re stupid.”
“You’re still a twig, Polar Bear.” Arizona poked at Teddy’s arm, giggling as her puffer jacket bounced back. “A twiggy polar bear,” she burst out into laughter at that. “Teddy the twiggy polar bear.”
“I am not twiggy! I’m a badass. Here, get on my back. I’ll carry you all the way back to the apartment.”
If she hadn’t been drunk and probably concussed, there was a less than 10% chance sober Arizona would climb on Teddy’s back. That would’ve been a good, responsible choice.
However, Arizona was most certainly drunk and likely concussed, and honestly, her legs were tired.
Which is how Arizona and Teddy ended up in the elevator up to Callie and Arizona’s apartment, Arizona hanging off of Teddy’s back like a koala.
“Told you so, Penguin.”
“Yes, yes, you’re very strong, Polar Bear.” Arizona patted Teddy’s cheek in what she thought was a gentle manner, but was far closer to a slap. “Now, mush!”
Just as they reached the blue door, it flew open revealing Callie, who looked nothing short of irate with them. “Get in here! Aquí estás, he estado preocupado! All I got was a text that you were going snowing! You couldn't have stopped by and let Mark know where you were going? You knew he's home with Sof. Eso no tiene sentido! Pensé que estaban muertos. Podría mataros dos idiotas. What were you thinking?”
Arizona and Teddy, well, Teddy stood in the doorway, both their mouths hanging open as Callie ranted at them.
“Um, it was snowing,” Teddy started.
“And Teddy really likes snow,” Arizona continued, shrinking a bit under Callie’s incredibly unimpressed glare. “So we went for a walk. That’s all.”
Callie took a few steps closer, her eyes narrowing as she fixed on Arizona’s face, more specifically her forehead. Arizona tried to hide behind Teddy, but like she said, Teddy was twiggy. “What happened to your head, Arizona? And yours, Teddy?”
“There may have been a bit of an accident, nothing major.”
“Arizona, get off of Teddy’s back and let me look.” Arizona followed her wife’s instructions, following Callie into the kitchen where there was better light. “Theodora Altman, if you take so much as a step outside of that door, I swear to God….” Teddy froze halfway out of the apartment, her eyes wide, and retreated back into the apartment. “Oh my God, Arizona, what happened?” Callie brushed her fingers over the angry bruise above Arizona’s eyebrow.
“It was all Arizona’s fault!”
“You’re a terrible polar bear!”
“Arizona found a sled and suggested we go sledding. She said she used to do it all the time and that it was safe-”
“You’re the one who lost control and knocked our heads together!”
“Both of you, sit down now,” snapped Callie, pointing to the couch. Teddy and Arizona shuffled over to the couch, dropping down in sync, their shoulders knocking together. “Okay, so you went out in a blizzard after you two drank what looks like a bottle of gin and a bottle of wine and decided to go sledding on a random sled you found. You knocked your heads together-”
“-and fell off the sled,” cut in Arizona helpfully.
Callie sighed, nodding. “And fell off the sled. You both have some nasty bruises on your faces and maybe concussions. Did I get that right?” They both nodded, wincing a bit. “Great. Did you lose consciousness at all?”
Teddy and Arizona glanced at each other. “No, I don’t think so,” Arizona said with a shrug.
“We didn’t. Arizona was talking about calling Yang or Karev to get us because she didn’t want you to know.”
“Teddy,” Arizona groaned, leaning back against the sofa.
“Sorry, Penguin.”
Callie moved to sit on the coffee table in front of them, already holding up her phone’s flashlight. “Okay, Teddy, I’ll check your pupils, but I think we should give Henry a call and you should stay here tonight.” Callie checked Teddy’s eyes, her brow pinched in concentration.
“You’re really, really hot, Calliope,” Arizona hummed from her place slumped on the couch. “Like super hot.”
“Stop being gross, Penguin.” Teddy smacked Arizona’s leg.
“Penguin?” Callie prompted, gently probing along the bruise on Teddy’s face.
Teddy snickered. “Get it? Cause a robin is a bird and she’s Robbins and penguins are snow birds.” Teddy nodded, clearly proud of herself.
“And Teddy’s a polar bear,” Arizona added, “‘cause teddy bear and polar bears.”
Callie shook her head. “You two are so drunk. Your pupils look okay, Teddy. Arizona, your turn.” Arizona leaned forward with a groan. “You don’t feel like you’re going to throw up or anything?”
“Nope.” Arizona beamed at her wife, her dimples popping through.
“Aren’t you cold?” Callie asked, nodding towards the soaked hoodie and jean jacket her wife was sporting. Callie held Arizona’s chin still so she could check her eyes. “You two seriously are going to give me grey hair.”
“You’d look hot with grey hair.”
“Not the point, Arizona.”
“Still a good point though.”
“You two were supposed to be having a quiet night watching movies or something. Not giving each other head traumas.” Callie dropped her phone into her lap. “Your pupils look fine too. But I think we should have Derek take a look tomorrow morning.” She glanced between the blondes. Teddy yawned, leaning her head on Arizona’s shoulder. “Okay, why don’t you two get out of your wet clothes and then bed?”
Ten minutes later, Callie found herself lying on one side of Arizona while Teddy lay on the other side. Arizona turned her head each way before bursting out laughing.
“Go to sleep, Arizona.”
“We used to have Mark in our bed all the time. Now, we have Teddy.”
“Sleep, Arizona,” Callie grumbled, throwing an arm over Arizona’s waist and pressing a kiss to Arizona’s shoulder.
“Night, Callie,” called Teddy from the other side, “Night, Penguin.”
“Night, Polar Bear, night, Calliope.”
“Okay, everyone go to sleep.”
xx
“Whoa, Robbins, did you get in a fight last night or something?” Karev asked, his voice way too loud. “Oh crap, did you fight Altman? She looks rough.”
“Karev, if you keep talking to me, I swear to God, I will put you on scut for the rest of your life.”
“I’m just saying, you two look like you went a few rounds.”
“Karev, indoor voices.”
“I, uh, I am? Should I whisper?”
“Shh, just no more talking and I’m going to lay my head on the nice, cold desk and we’re going to be quiet.”
“Sure thing, boss!”
“Damn it, Karev!”