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Tadashi has no idea why he believed what Tsukki had said, he didn't know why he believed he'd keep his promise if he couldn't even keep his own.
It all started on a Sunday in July. He'd told his boyfriend he couldn't keep doing it anymore. Tsukki cheated, that was obvious, he'd found out a while ago, they talked about it before; it had practically become routine at this point. He would say he was tired of being cheated on, the blonde would say he was sorry and that he'd stop, he would kiss him and say that he loved him and he'd say it was okay and smile as if it didn't hurt. Every time he would promise himself it was the last time this would happen, he'd tell himself he'd break up with his boyfriend if it happened again but he never did, he would always accept Tsukki's half assed apologies regardless of what happened.
"Look, I can't keep doing this anymore, I want you to promise me you'll stop cheating" he had said as they ate, casually as if they were discussing something trivial like the weather.
"I'm sorry Tadashi, I promise I'll stop this time" he said, and he believed him, like a fool, as he returned the quick kiss his boyfriend gave him.
-
It genuinely seemed like Tsukki had stopped, Tadashi felt as if he was finally free of all the harsh feelings he harbored for the people he caught his boyfriend with, most of them weren't aware of the situation, there was no reason for him to hate them, but he still hated them, still felt a twinge of jealousy, even if it didn't make sense to him.
-
"You promised!" he screamed at his former boyfriend's face. "You fucking promised me, Tsukki!" tears streamed down his face as he took him by the collar and shook him.
"Look, i'm sorry-"
"You're not! I know you aren't, so stop lying to me!"
"Stop. Why can't you just stop? You say the same thing again and again, you promised you'd stop doing it, told me you'd stop cheating and lying but you haven't! You haven't changed" he said as he fell to the ground, his sobs growing louder. He felt a hand on his back, it was Tsukki's. Tsukki almost looked as if he was smiling, and he felt as if he could forgive him for all he'd done, but he wouldn't, he couldn't do that, he promised to himself it'd be the last time, he'd said that so many times but he knew this time was the last one, if not for him then for his friends who worried about him. "I can't keep doing this, Tsukki. I love you but I can't keep on forgiving you for all your mistakes if you aren't going to try to stop. I told you it was your last chance, but you still won't stop, regardless of what I do; do you even care about me? Do you even love me anymore? You've changed so much I can barely recognize you!" And he left, he got up and left, ignoring whatever bullshit excuse the other would try to tell him, they both knew he never meant his apologies, Tadashi has no idea why he even let himself think that the blond would keep his promise.
"Good bye, Tsukishima Kei" he said before he left, he'd never called the other by his full name, he never called him Tsukishima, it was always Tsukki or Kei or Darling, never Tsukishima, he hoped the other felt at least a little bad, realistically, he probably hadn’t, but he could wish.
Rain poured down, an odd coincidence that did nothing but sour his mood more. Tsukki loved the rain, loved staying inside doing nothing while people ran around trying to find shelter. He found himself hating the rain, found himself cursing the gods for his unfortunate fate. He let himself get drenched instead of looking for somewhere to get away from it, walking around aimlessly without anywhere to go. He passed by an ice cream shop, remembering when they'd go on dates there or hanged out with their friends, Tadashi wasn't sure he'd be able to go there anymore, so many of his favorite places were tainted by Tsukki's presence and he hated that going to them would now trigger those bittersweet memories.
As he walked through the rain he quickly texted Yachi, asking if they could hang out for a bit, already walking in the direction of her apartment.
He knocked on the door, being greeted by his best friend, halfway through a tub of ice cream. They sat down and after a while he finally felt like he could tell the story. He sighed before explaining everything to her, who stayed silent with the exeption of a "fucking cheating bastard" or "fuck that man, you deserve better" here and there; he laughed at those comments. They spent the next hours playing games (Yachi kicked his ass in Mario Party and he won most Mario Kart races) while she told him about random things that had happened to her and her girlfriend.
It was almost midnight when he left her apartment, the rain had already stopped, and without the noise from it he was forced to walk back home in silence.
When he entered his house he almost expected to see Tsukki there, saying "welcome home" like he used to, he'd kiss him and they'd eat while they talked about their days. Instead of that, he was greeted by an almost chilling silence, as if time had fully stopped. He walked through the empty halls while finally processing what had happened. He couldn't even cry himself to sleep as all his tears had already been shed before. After years, he once again went to sleep in an empty bed, suddenly feeling too large and spacious. At that moment it felt as if he'd never move on, he knew he'd done the right thing, so why did he feel so awful?