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Changbin should have been more suspicious the minute the agency set them up with the new managers Hyunjin and Jeongin.
Like, they are both younger than him for crying out loud. Especially Jeongin, who is younger than literally all of them. Even Jisung.
It wasn't until May 28, right before Pride month, when the agency suddenly called him and told him about their plans, when Changbin Realised (and subsequently felt like an idiot).
The reasons the agency give him only serve to make him feel more angry and humiliated. CB97 is the leader, HE can't be gay. Lee Know is too handsome. J.One is already in a relationship with a guy and we can't risk everyone knowing that because the guy is a nobody. You, SpearB, and Yang Jeongin will make the perfect rockstar-manager couple for the audience.
For the audience. As if they are characters in a show and not real people with real feelings and emotions.
You are already gay so there shouldn't be a problem?
But there is a problem. The problem is that even though Changbin wanted to come out for so long, he didn't want to come like this.
Changbin sighs and eyes his supposed boyfriend sitting across him.
He must have glared a little bit because Jeongin holds up his hands. "Hey. I told you. If you are too uncomfortable with this-"
"No it's fine. I mean not really. But yeah, whatever."
Jeongin just hums. "I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault."
"I know. Still. This must suck. When are we supposed to 'break up' exactly?"
"They didn't say. After Pride month ends, I suppose." Changbin laughs humourlessly.
"This clearly bothers you. Why don't you just say no to all this? Surely the company can't force you that much?"
Changbin stays quiet for a while. There is truth in Jeongin's words, they both know that. Changbin can just stand up for himself and say no.
But the opportunity, the permission to finally come out has been granted to him and he is not a fool. After all, when the fake dating is over, none of this would matter anymore except for the fact that he can be openly gay, which is what he really wants. In a way, he is almost luckier than his bandmates.
"Because I have wanted to come out for very long now," says Changbin. Jeongin looks a little surprised. "I am not missing this chance if I can help it."
"Oh," says Jeongin and turns his head away. "I see."
"Does this bother you?"
"A lot, to be honest."
"Wow, I didn't know pretending to like me is so much for you."
"That's not-" Jeongin begins but then catches Changbin's expression. "Ugh, seriously Changbin? You are messing with me right now?"
Changbin's grin only widens. He may not know Jeongin that well but they both have a habit of teasing each other and having fun. Maybe pretending to date him won't be that bad after all.
"You should call me hyung, you know," Changbin says. "We are supposed to be dating. Close enough for you to call me hyung."
"If we are dating, why should I call you hyung? I should call you something like 'honey', right?"
The sudden pet-name makes Changbin blink but Jeongin continues as if nothing happened. To be fair, nothing really happened. Maybe the fake dating thing is messing with Changbin's head.
"Anyway, you said it bothers you a lot," says Changbin, changing the topic. "Then why did you agree?"
Jeongin once again turns his head away. "Well, they said they only made me a manager for this. And...being manager actually has a good salary so..."
"Oh," says Changbin. "You didn't wanna lose your position."
Jeongin nods. "They also said that if I agree they will cover some extra.... expenses I have."
Changbin doesn't know a lot about Jeongin's personal life, but he knows enough to know that his family isn't that well off financially and he and his older brother have to support the family. It makes sense that he wouldn't turn down any extra money.
"I was prepared to tell the agency to fuck off when you said this bothers you a lot," says Changbin. "But if they are gonna remove you from manager for that...I'm not gonna. You are too cute to not have around."
Jeongin meets his eyes finally, a faint blush covering his cheeks, but his eyes are knowing, telling Changbin that he hasn't been fooled by the compliment. "Thank you for that."
"But I don't get it. Hyunjin was also made a manager along with you. Why wasn't he chosen?"
Jeongin shrugs. "They told me they were testing both of us to see who would be more suitable. Apparently Hyunjin hyung is too good looking and will steal the spotlight if he is made the fake boyfriend."
"Wow," says Changbin, scoffing. "They really insulted us both with that, huh?"
Jeongin smiles. "They sure did. I don't really mind, to be honest. I'm getting the money, after all."
He says it jokingly, but Changbin can tell how much he really needs the money. It's almost ironic how both of them are so bothered but neither can refuse because they are getting something good out of it, even if it is in a twisted way.
"We should discuss stuff," says Jeongin suddenly. "That's what they told us to do. What are some things couples typically do?"
"Uh, take lovey-dovey selfies?"
Jeongin makes a face but claps his hands. "Okay then! Come here. Take out your phone."
It's surprisingly easy to fake their relationship. What's even more surprising is how so many people buy it. Sure, there are skeptical people who claim that the whole thing is fake (which, true) but the majority of Phobia's fans buy it. They buy it, eat it up and spread it like wildfire.
"Look, hyung," says Jeongin and shows him an fan-made edit of them. "How did they even get so much stuff of you and me? They somehow managed to slap together every single interaction we ever had from before we even announced we were dating."
"Yeah," says Changbin. For some reason, his throat feels tight. Must be all the practice he did for their next performance. "It's funny."
"It's hilarious," says Jeongin, sitting back and thumbing through his phone with a grin. Changbin watches him, the pleasant sight of Jeongin looking so happy- with his dimples popping out beautifully- contrasting heavily with the unpleasant feeling swirling deep in his gut.
Jeongin's tone whenever he mentions their 'relationship' is always either mocking or clinically detached.
It hurts.
But who cares? It's all going to end soon. His boss told him that their fake relationship has been successful, it brought in more fans who now listen to their music. Which means it's going to end very soon.
Soon they would have to stop giving random fanservice before posting on some social media platform about how they aren't dating anymore.
Changbin throat feels impossibly tight. It aches.
"You are staring at me," says Jeongin suddenly and Changbin startles.
He has been staring at him. "Sorry," he says and gets up to leave. To his surprise, Jeongin grabs his hand and pulls him back down on the couch.
Changbin gives in easily. He had a soft spot for Jeongin from day 1 after all.
Sucks that it was never reciprocated.
"Is something wrong? I have been noticing for a few days, you seem off. Usually you would try to obnoxiously cuddle me and kiss me, screaming about how you are my boyfriend-" Jeongin breaks off with a chuckle. "You are so silly sometimes, hyung."
Yes, he is silly for catching whatever the hell he has caught for his fake boyfriend. He is silly for revisiting the memories of them holding hands and pressing kisses on each others' cheeks, imagining what it would feel like if it had been real and not for the cameras.
"I'm fine," he says. "I can cuddle you right now if you want me to," he jokes, even though every joke he makes these days sends a jab of pain through him.
Jeongin stares for a while, his smile dimming.
"I hope I'm not reading this wrong, but," Jeongin worries his lower lips between his teeth and Changbin wants to pull it free before he hurts himself, "do you maybe wanna go on a date?"
Changbin frowns. "Did we have a schedule? Will my fansites be even present-"
"No. That's why I'm asking you out."
Changbin's eyes nearly pop out of his sockets. "What?"
"I'm asking you out. On a real date. Without any fansites," Jeongin's confidence seems to grow with every word. "What do you say?"
A few seconds of stunned silence.
Then Changbin's reply comes in the form of him crushing the younger in a hug tight enough to hurt.
And for once, Jeongin gives a real kiss back in response instead of pulling away.