Chapter Text
Katsuki wasn’t big on drinking. He didn’t go out of his way to go to bars or parties. At some point he became the designated driver, typically sober by the end of the night. His friends were reckless with drinks, so they were pretty lucky to end up with Katsuki.
But today was an exception.
Today Katsuki was at a small bar, just a few blocks away from his apartment. He was several glasses down, his refusal to drink in the past and low tolerance coming back to bite him in the ass. A terrible time to realize what a lightweight he was, truly.
The bartender watched him, concern in his eyes as Katsuki waved him down for a refill. “You sure, bud? You’re not looking too great…” “I’m fuckin’ certain as hell!” Pouring another, the man slid it over, adding another drink to his tab. The bill was getting pretty high.
“Gonna have to cut you off soon…”
“N-No! ‘M not far from home so ‘s all good!”
“Sure, man. Sure.”
He walked away to serve another customer, just missing the way Katsuki slumped in his seat, hands holding his head. His brain was getting numb. Good.
As long as he didn’t have to think about what happened, he’d be fine. If he didn’t think about how much his heart ached and how empty his apartment was and the words that Izuku said he would be fine. If he didn’t think about the fact he was alone, he would be just fine.
Despite his best efforts, those damned emerald eyes wouldn’t leave him alone. It was impossible to shake Izuku’s voice and face and hands while he could still think straight. Downing the last of his whisky, he waved the bartender over.
He needs another drink.
...
Everything was blurry. Katsuki couldn’t see properly, at least three of everything surrounding him. The soft music was all too loud now, making his head spin. Despite this, he ordered another whisky. This still wasn’t numb enough to wash away how much his heart ached.
There were few residents in the building at this hour, meaning Katsuki hadn’t gathered much attention and was still all alone. No one talked to him. Though, he doesn’t suppose he would want anyone talking to him with how he felt.
He liked the lack of attention for once, but that was shattered in a moment’s notice.
"Kacchan?!"
The blonde jolted, sitting straight up before turning to look at who called him. He didn’t quite register the voice, or why that name was his, but he knew it was. There was a man right behind him, eyes wide and mouth agape. He almost looked like he’d seen a ghost.
Katsuki giggled at the expression, the stranger reminding him of someone. The stranger got closer, looking as though he was about to speak but Katsuki beat him to it.
“Ya look jus’ like my boyfrien’!” Katsuki slurred excitedly, the smile lasting just a moment longer before he seemed to remember something. His face dropped, figure wilting once more, “My ex boyfrien’, I mean. He’s so pretty… yer almost as pretty as ‘im. I miss ‘im…”
The man tilted his head in confusion before seemingly making a realization. "You don't recognize me?" He asked, though it sounded like more of a statement.
"Noope! But ya look like Deku!" He confirmed, sitting up once more. "I see..." Katsuki watched as the stranger took a seat next to him, hands clasped together on the table. He ordered a drink before turning to him.
"What are you doing here?"
“Drinkin’! What th' fuck else?”
“Good point.”
“Why’re you 'ere?”
“To do the same, I suppose. Drink my sadness away.”
The blonde nodded, taking a sip of his drink while the man placed an order. They were silent for a moment before Katsuki sighed heavily, turning to look at the stranger. He felt as though he should recognize him, but he simply couldn’t see or think properly. Oh well.
"What're you sad 'bout?"
"... A breakup."
"Me too!"
The stranger offered a weak smile, accepting the glass from the bartender and downing it quickly. Impressed, Katsuki grinned, doing the same with his own. It kinda hurt his throat now, but he had no intention of stopping.
“Ya know…" Katsuki started, suddenly looking thoughtful, "I shoulda seen it comin’. I think I always knew… ya know?”
"Seen what coming?"
"The breakup."
"Oh... Why's that?"
“He was always too good for me… I was n’ver gonna be ‘nough, no matter how ‘ard I tried…”
“That can’t be true..."
A dry laugh escaped his lips as he looked at the stranger. What does he know? He doesn't know that Deku deserved the world, something Katsuki could never provide.
"I'm... I'm sure he didn't expect the world of you." Oh. He was talking out loud, huh? Guess Deku rubbed off on him more than he knew.
Katsuki smiled sadly, looking up at him through damp lashes. He sighed, collecting his jumbled thoughts before he spoke again. “I jus’... always thought he’d be ‘ere… even when i was a lil snot brat… I thought ‘Deku ‘ll always be ‘ere!’ but now…”
Katsuki paused, lips pulled tight to try and stop the sobs that wanted to escape. His chin wobbled, eyes shut to keep the tears in. He didn’t want to cry, not in a bar with people he didn’t know. Crying was for the house, not the public.
“I dunno what ‘m gonna do without ‘im…” He whimpered finally, “I-I’ve never… h-he… we’ve always ‘ad each other…”
It was true, they didn’t know a life without the other. From as far back as they could remember they always had a companion, whether they got along or not. They had each other’s trust, and it was all they needed.
“I mean… one day at a time right? What are you gonna do when you get home?” The stranger asked gently, hesitantly resting a hand on the other’s back.
“‘M gonna cry. Might drink some more… Got some vodka for when I finally get kicked out...”
"M-More?!"
"Yeah."
"But what about tomorrow?” Katsuki was silent then, simply waving for another drink. It was gone in an instant, quickly replaced by a glass of ice water. He swirled the glass, making the cubes clink before replying with a sort of wistfulness to his voice.
"If I drink enough I won’t have to worry about it.”
The stranger gasped, eyes wide and panicked despite how calmly Katsuki had spoken.
"O-Over some guy?! A worthless nobody!?"
Katsuki bristled at that, shooting the taller man a fierce glare despite his drunkness.
"Don' talk shit 'bout 'im!" He growled, "I 'ready said it was my bad!"
"Sorry..."
His anger melted quickly, replaced with the sadness he wore before.
"I know 's pathetic but... nothin' to live for 'nymore 'nyway..."
"That can't be right. You seem like you have so much life ahead of you. So much you can do. You can do more now that you're alone, right?"
Katsuki laughed, waving for a rum before turning to meet the strangers eyes.
"Nothin' is worth doin' if he ain't with me."
"Oh..."
The bartender approached but finally shook his head, refusing the service. Tired, Katsuki didn’t even argue.
“Goin’ home then.” He mumbled, handing over his credit card.
Once the payment was complete he stood on his wobbly legs, stumbling a few steps before stopping to bring a hand over his mouth. He felt sick, unable to take another step without fearing to lose his dinner.
Rushing to his side, the stranger supported the shorter man, one hand on his waist the other pulling his arm around his shoulders.
“Can I help you get home?”
Katsuki nodded absently, eyes focused on the hand that held him. His fingers grazed over the scars lightly, reverently.
“Deku used to ‘old me like this…” He said quietly. As though the touch was his final straw, Katsuki's throat closed up as tears filled his eyes. When they walked out of the building, he finally sobbed.
It was fucking stupid to break down with a stranger, but he was too weak to hold himself together any longer.
“Sorry. ‘M sorry. ‘M sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.” Katsuki hiccupped, “Didn’t wanna cry…”
“It’s okay,” the stranger replied softly, “It’s okay.”
'God,' Izuku thought as they approached the building, 'I was a fucking idiot...'
...