Chapter Text
Neil added Todd to Keating English Period 4
Neil: Hey Todd! Welcome to Wellton lol can’t wait to work with you in english
meeks: yea keating is great :)
Todd: cool yeah thanks haha
nuwanda: pLEASE tell me ur good at poetry
Todd: ??
pitts: don’t scare him off charlie lol
Todd: i’m not great at it ahaha sorry
nuwanda: f u c k okay cool
nuwanda: no offense ofc i’m sure u are a very nice person todd last name
Todd: anderson lol
Todd: sorry wait is your name charlie or nuwanda?
nuwanda: oh shit yeah!!!!
nuwanda: i go by either charlie or nuwanda, he/they pronouns <3
nuwanda: also i’m INCREDIBLY queer and will def flirt with u because u are adorable
Todd: oh cool okay!
Todd: nice to meet u nuwanda
Todd: uhhh i’m todd he/him :)
nuwanda: i would die for u todd
Neil: Okay i’m back lol!! hi!
Todd: hi :)
Neil: Oh shit introductions? Right on !!
Neil: I’m Neil, he/him
Neil: @pitts @meeks @cameron @knox
Cameron: Oh my fucking god i’m studying right now what
Cameron: oh fuck !
nuwanda: lmfaoooo
Cameron: i’m Richard Cameron, he/him
Todd: uhhh hi
Cameron: yeah okay bye
nuwanda: don’t worry about him todd, he’s always like that <3
Todd: …brusque ?
nuwanda: a dick <333
Todd: was that a richard joke
meeks: heyyyy sorry i got distracted
meeks: beyoncé was on the radio so what could i do
nuwanda: i speak for the whole chat when i say so true bestie
Neil: Yeah fair
meeks: neil ur auto-cap burns my retinas
Neil: Fuck You :)
meeks: i’m steven meeks, i go by meeks, and also he/him
Todd: why does everyone go by their last names here
Neil: >:/
nuwanda: >:0
meeks: idk because the teachers suck and the students have pack mentality ?????
pitts: damn meeks put them on blast
pitts: hey todd! i’m gerard pitts aka pitts :D he/him and designated mom friend
meeks: and my significant bother
Todd: other *** ?
meeks: i know what i said <3
pitts: lmao we’re qpps
Todd: oh nice !
nuwanda: knoxious is the last one here as always :/
knox: you called?
Neil: How tf do u always do that ???
knox: do what?
Neil: Know when Charlie mentions u but not noticing when someone else actually tags u?
nuwanda: his undying love for me obv
knox: idk coincidence
knox: wtf i’m not in love w u nuwanda
nuwanda: babe D:
Todd: i’m literally so confused rn
knox: knox overstreet he/him and NOT dating charlie, despite their claims
Todd: uhhh cool okay
meeks: hey while we’re all here why did y’all get for trig question 8?
Neil: 14.5
pitts: 14.5
nuwanda: haven’t done it yet lol
knox: -238 and ¼
knox: oh shit
nuwanda: oooof
meeks: yikes knox
knox: wtf
Todd: hey hate to be that gay but what is the english assignment that we’re all in a group for?
Todd: guy**
nuwanda: ohoho a freudian slip
Cameron: i mean tomorrow we just have to present an original poem
Cameron: but the group project is a long term thing.
Cameron: Mr. Keating said some vague stuff about wisdom coming from others and like the combined power of creative minds?
Cameron: i was doing chemistry homework so
nuwanda: gASP ????
nuwanda: our very own dickie cameron WASNT PAYING ATTENTION IN CLASS???
Cameron: i will do anything for you to never call me dickie again
Todd: do we need to present the poem to the class or just turn it in to mr keating?
nuwanda: tell me ur sexuality and it’s a deal
Cameron: no.
pitts: @Todd idk keating usually has us present but i was zoned out too
nuwanda: how long are u going to keep me in suspense here dickie???
Cameron: it’s been three years Nuwanda. if u haven’t figured it out by now there’s no way i’m telling you
meeks: yeah @Todd it’s a class presentation
nuwanda: you’re a sick man
Todd: does anyone know if he has a different policy for like uhhhhhhh mental health stuff?
Cameron: that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me
Neil: Keating is chill but the school board and principal Nolan and all them super suck?
Neil: so basically you need to jump through a LOT of legal hoops for that stuff and most of the faculty will be fully working against you while you do it :( sorry
nuwanda: i finished my original poem for keatings class
Todd: okay yeah. thanks neil
nuwanda: wanna hear it cameron?
Cameron: not particularly, but loathe would i be to enable you with reverse psychology either
Todd: and meeks and pitts !!
Todd: hey what’s going on with charlie and cameron?
nuwanda: is he very straight? is he very pan?
knox: the question we’ve all been asking honestly
nuwanda: is he very gay? who is this man?
Cameron: that was very impressive in comparison to ur usual work, Charlie.
nuwanda: fuck off <3
Cameron: did you have any particular muse in mind while writing this piece?
nuwanda: i will kiss you on the mouth
Cameron: bet.
Todd: neil i’m scared whats happening
Neil: 50/50 on flirting or murder
meeks: flirting
nuwanda: square up bitch
knox: bitch is derogatory to women!!
nuwanda: fair point
meeks: oh i see how it is. knox he’ll listen to
Neil: What else is new lol
nuwanda: square up dick
Cameron: see now we’ve circled back to the Richard thing
Cameron: compromise: you stop bugging me for fifteen minutes while i finish latin and then i’ll paint your nails
nuwanda: done.
nuwanda: no take backs.
Todd: are they dating ???
Todd: i don’t want to be rude
Todd: oh geez sorry
Todd: if you guys don’t mind answering
nuwanda: eh it’s fine
Cameron: yeah no sweat it’s fine we can answer
Todd: okay cool
Todd: …
Cameron: glad we have that cleared up.
Todd: sorry are u mad at me rn?
Cameron: that’s just my default aura no
Todd: ok cool this is awkward now
nuwanda: glad that’s all good then!! bye u beautiful fuckers <3
Neil: I gotta go too but i’m excited to hear your poem tomorrow Todd!!
Todd: oh, well. thanks yeah.
Keating English Period 4
meeks: holy shit todd
nuwanda: “”””””i’m not that great at poetry”””””” stfu !!!!!
Cameron: i agree, your poem today was very good
Todd: oh thanks haha
Todd: it was ok i guess ?
Todd: but thanks
pitts: it was more than okay todd!!!!
Neil: Yeah!
Todd: oh hey neil
Neil: Hey :)
Todd: i thought u had rehearsals today???
Neil: Nah it’s just ensemble today no leads
nuwanda: oh my god
Neil: Todd!!
Todd: neil!!
Neil: Ur poem was completely incredible.
Todd: thanks ahaha
Todd: ur very nice.
Todd: your poem was beautiful too!!
Neil: Oh thanks! But it was nothing compared to yours, wow!
meeks: h e y
pitts: yeah!!! no talking bad about yourself!!!!!!
nuwanda: neil i will fight anyone who slanders ur good name, up to and including yourself
Neil: Awww thanks you guys :)
Todd: i loved the shakespeare reference especially :D the thematic tie-in by misquoting the opening and epilogue of midsummers night dream w ur concept of theatre as an extended metaphor for our understanding of the hidden self and like ‘’’acting’’’ was so genius i loved that
Neil: Omg thanks!!! :,D
nuwanda: holy shit that’s the most uve ever said i think
pitts: don’t be mean!!
nuwanda: i meant in a nice way!!!!!!
meeks: technically he’s texting not talking, charlie
nuwand: stfu meeks <3
Neil: That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me Todd seriously thank you!
Todd: oh haha yeah. i’m not saying anything that isn’t true :)
Neil: :)
nuwanda: oh?
Neil: ??
nuwanda: ;) nothing nothing
Cameron: seriously Nuwanda????
nuwanda: oh seeing nuwanda capitalized is Bad ahaha
Cameron: legit or haha ?
nuwanda: haha, don’t worry
Cameron: gotcha.
nuwanda: anyway i have no idea what ur implying cameron :)))
Neil: Yeah me neither what is happening
nuwanda: don’t u worry ur pretty little head neil
Cameron: i’m just reminding Charlie that maybe they shouldn’t be so hypocritical about certain personal stuff
nuwanda: !!!!!!? why i NEVER.
nuwanda: me????? hypocritical?????? NEVER.
Cameron: hmm.
meeks: damn that felt VERY judgemental
nuwanda: @meeks ik i’m begrudgingly impressed tbh
Cameron: i’m just saying maybe u shouldn’t pretend ur that great at knowing when people are flirting
Neil: Wait what
nuwanda: i’m sure i don’t know what ur implying my dear cameron
Cameron: yeah, i’m sure too. that’s the point.
Neil: No back up what??
Todd: neil. nuwanda thought we were flirting.
Neil: WHAT
Neil: That's RIDICULOUS!!!
Todd: huh.
Neil: Todd is straight!!!!!!
Todd: h u h .
meeks: oh, neil
pitts: neil what
nuwanda: neil are u for REAL??
Cameron: dude.
knox: wait what’s going on right now
Todd: to be clear lol uhhh aahah
Todd: i’m not straight hahahaha
Todd: but uhhhhh i also wasn’t flirting with neil
Todd: haha
Neil: WAIT YOU ARENT STRAIGHT ?
Todd: please tell me why u thought i was
Todd: i must be doing something wrong
nuwanda: anajskxkskwn
Neil: You said Ginny was pretty!
Todd: yeah that’s an objective fact tho.
meeks: can confirm
knox: yea
meeks: knox u are attracted to girls
knox: yes??
meeks: the point was objectivity
knox: i can think some girls are attractive without thinking all girls are attractive. and i can think girls are pretty without being attracted to them.
meeks: u know what? ur right. that’s on me.
pitt: teachable moment lol
Neil: Wtf is happening
Todd: IM GAY NEIL
nuwanda: i love this fucking group chat
Private Message: Todd > nuwanda
Todd: hey nuwanda??
nuwanda: heyyyy toddles
Todd: huh. okay.
Todd: anyway.
Todd: i am coming to you with an offer of an information exchange
nuwanda: this is the best day of my life
nuwanda: tell me more :D
Keating English Period 4
nuwanda: @Cameron i’m calling u out in front of god and everybody
knox: i thought u were atheist
nuwanda: i’m agnostic when i need to be dramatic
meeks: i’m not sure that’s how that works
Cameron: @nuwanda what do you wandkckkcisg
meeks: woa what
meeks: mans got fucking murdered before he could finish typing
nuwanda: babe ur ruining my dramatic moment
Cameron: someone found my secret filing cabinet
nuwanda: your WHAT
meeks: ur w h a t
pitts: oh my good what
Cameron: nevermind forget i said anything
meeks: no what
nuwanda: richie W H A T
Cameron: don’t even worry about it.
nuwanda: i cannot be distracted that easily my good sir!!
Cameron: weren’t you about to put me on blast for something??
pitts: shit, he can totally be distracted that easily
nuwanda: heY YEA
nuwanda: a reliable source that wishes to remain anonymous at this time has informed me of some very interesting information
nuwanda: say, cameron, u wouldn’t happen to know anything about social media, would you?
nuwanda: it’s only that ur always saying how terrible it is for our Young Developing Minds, so of course you don’t have any accounts, and would never, right?
Cameron: fuck.
nuwanda: well, that’s what i had THOUGHT.
meeks: oh my god oh my god
pitts: blow this case wide open charlie
nuwanda: but THEN i found an old youtube account, deep in the recesses of the internet
Cameron: jesus christ
nuwanda: don’t bother deleting anything, richard. i have downloaded every single one of the 62 videos uploaded
Cameron: nuwanda i will do anything to get u to stop talking oh my god
nuwanda: anything?
Cameron: anything.
meeks: then perish
pitts: i was gonna say
nuwanda: screw u guys for stealing my thunder
nuwanda: but are u friendship safewording cuz that’s cool if so
knox: sorry is he WHAT
nuwanda: u know. friendship safewording.
knox: nuwanda that’s a sex thing
nuwanda: not if it’s friendship safewording!!!!
meeks: @knox it’s just what we call, like, our boundaries for things to not joke about
knox: oh okay uh sure
Cameron: sighhhh i’m not gonna screw over the integrity of the friendship safeword
nuwanda: i have ur consent to share this cursed information??
Cameron: begrudgingly, and i will get revenge.
nuwanda: 43 of these videos are ariana grande kalimba covers
meeks: NO
pitts: that sounds kind of cool actually
Cameron: trust me, it isn’t
nuwanda: the rest are actually pretty decent makeup tutorials
nuwanda: like u suck at explaining but the looks are pretty solid for a thirteen year old
Cameron: jesus fucking christ
meeks: wait this is from when u were 13??
Cameron: i was a middle schooler once, Meeks. i do age like any mortal.
meeks: i mean i know that logically but u sort of seem like you’ve always been 43 and will never/have never been any other age
Cameron: i’m a TEENAGER
nuwanda: meeks isn’t wrong babe
Keating English Period 4
Neil: Guys wait what is the assignment today?
pitts: close your eyes for two full minutes and then write a paragraph about it
Neil: Awesome okay!
Neil: Thanks!!
Cameron: this class is so goddamn weird
knox: i actually like it
Cameron: i didn’t say i didn’t like it it’s just really weird
Neil: That’s fair.
Cameron: plus Mr. Keating totally picks favorites
Neil: What?? No he doesn’t
nuwanda: he kind of does neil. u just don’t notice bc ur his favorite
Neil: Oh my god no i’m not
pitts: you didn’t know???
Todd: yea it’s pretty obvious sorry neil
nuwanda: ok but slow ur roll todd, because you’re his other favorite
Todd: i am not !!!
Neil: Oh i can see that actually.
meeks: alright but he likes u too nuwanda
nuwanda: WHAT NO
Cameron: jesus christ.
Cameron: okay. his favorites are Neil and Todd, obviously.
Neil: Not obviously!!
Cameron: then Charlie. then Meeks and Pitts, then everyone else, then me
pitts: hEY DONT PUT YOURSELF DOWN
nuwanda: i can’t fucking believe a teacher likes me this is going to RUIN my reputation
Cameron: i mean it’s not like a ‘poor me’ thing it makes sense. i have to follow the rules for my scholarship to this crazy fuckin expensive school, and Keating dislikes rule followers
pitts: that’s an oversimplification!!!
Cameron: i’m not torn up about it, i’m basically every boring teachers favorite so
nuwanda: aka every teacher besides oh captain my captain
Cameron: that’s what i said
nuwanda: anskaosjcndkwk
nuwanda: don’t hold back damn <3
Cameron: <3
Todd: i’m not his favorite
meeks: are we glossing over the fact that cameron just sent a heart emoticon
Neil: Todd, you’re awesome, of course he likes you!!
Todd: teachers usually want me to talk more
Neil: I mean so do i, i like hearing you talk
nuwanda: oh my god
Todd: oh hahaha thanks i guess uhhhhhh but uh
nuwanda: oh my god.
Todd: i mean i think he’s just that nice to everyone so.
Neil: He definitely isn’t so!
Neil: I mean i can't blame him, you’re one of my favorites too :)
Todd: usiwnwidocjkxnsnnd. dnd k
nuwanda: oh my GOD.
Todd: sorry dropped my phone lol ahahahahah thanks anyway uh
Cameron: wow.
Todd: i have to leave for reasons my brother is downstairs and i need to go feed the stove. bye haha
Neil: Bye!!!
nuwanda: christ.
Neil: Did he seem a little weird to you guys at the end there?
meeks: …no.
pitts: hahaha
Cameron: i give up.
nuwanda: neil oh my god
Neil: ????
Private Message: Cameron > nuwanda
Cameron: who’s your source
nuwanda: confidential
Cameron: not for revenge purposes, they’re not the target, you are
nuwanda: :0
Cameron: i just need someone in the know
nuwanda: wtf
Cameron: nothing super illegal
nuwanda: NOT VERY INFORMATIVE whAT
Cameron: don’t even worry about it.
nuwanda: too late i’m worrying wtf wtf
Cameron: okay. okay listen.
Cameron: can you keep a secret?
Private Message: Cameron > Todd
Cameron: hey Todd, i’m coming to you in want of information
Todd: i’m gonna kill charlie
Cameron: don’t worry, i’m getting revenge on him, not you.
Cameron: listen. you know how i’m an editor for the school newspaper?
Todd: sure.
Todd: wait hold on oh my god
Cameron: so actually that’s a white lie
Todd: holy shit
Cameron: i run the gossip column
Todd: hold the phone oh my god
Cameron: obviously i don’t want any relationship drama whatever, that’s not the sort of stuff i publish.
Todd: holy shit
Cameron: but i am very interested in the type of info one can only get from some hardcore sleuthing like you must have done to find my old youtube page.
Cameron: so were you to ever stumble across anything interesting on, say, the bribes that Mr. Pech has yet to be proven is accepting, i would be amenable to any price or exchange you may like.
Todd: holy fuck shit dude what oh my god
Cameron: and i trust that regardless of your choice, this stays between us?
Todd: yeah of course oh my god
Todd: i’m in.
Cameron: wait that easy
Todd: obviously this is great
Todd: shit okay.
Todd: coach jordan is siphoning sports funds into a private account and i have some,,,,, not proof but similar. i recorded half of a phone call that’s fairly incriminating while i was walking to the nurse so
Cameron: i can’t believe you’re a secret bad ass
Todd: just lucky
Cameron: how did you find my youtube
Todd: my brothers in college to do software engineer stuff. i called in a favor to find something embarrassing attached to your name bc i needed to bribe nuwanda
Cameron: this is the best fucking thing you’re a secret badass
Todd: i mean u too, you run the gossip column
Todd: i literally JUST got to this school and i know that it’s like a school-wide mystery
Cameron: no one suspects the brown noser
Todd: or the anxiety wreck. this is awesome.
Cameron: i need that voice recording Todd
Todd: yeah! i do want something in exchange tho.
Todd: are you and charlie dating?
Cameron: dude i wish
Todd: oh my god
Cameron: i’ve been flirting with them for three years and he still isn’t sure if i’m straight or not
Todd: oof
Cameron: big oof yea
Todd: i suck as a wingman or i would offer. best of luck
Cameron: thanks i guess
Todd: i have the recording on a hard drive, i’ll put it in your locker before school
Cameron: great okay
Cameron: wait how do you know my locker combination.
Cameron: Todd???
Keating English Period 4
Cameron: Todd i owe you my life
Todd: not PMs
Cameron: shit.
meeks: ??????
Neil: What?
pitts: deets deets deets
Cameron: no it’s private
nuwanda: hold ON
nuwanda: are you two DATING??????,,
Neil: Omg!!!?
meeks: WHAT
pitts: does anyone understand the chemistry homework?
Todd: NO
Cameron: obviously not
Todd: definitely not!!
Cameron: never in a million years
Cameron: no offense, Todd
Todd: none taken
Todd: ur not my type
Cameron: you’re not my type either
nuwanda: because he’s a guy or because other reasons?
Todd: charlie….
meeks: wait okay so if you’re not dating then whats the secret
Todd: nothing
Cameron: there’s no secret
knox: they’re definitely dating
nuwanda: @knox where ARE you most of the time???
knox: eating pussy lol
Neil: Even i can tell thats obviously a lie
Todd: we’re not dating!!!!
meeks: hmm.
Neil: Sure you guys aren’t! But if you were, know that we would all support you both 100% :)
nuwanda: speak for urself
Cameron: Todd is a secret badass!!! that’s the secret
meeks: okay i LOVE todd he’s the BEST
Todd: oh thanks haha
meeks: but that’s obviously bullshit
Todd: oof.
nuwanda: shit are we turning on todd now??
nuwanda: fuck it, team cameron for the breakup
nuwanda: todd is actually a secret badass it’s tru. i have receipts
Todd: i will murder you both
Todd: “i trust that… this stays between us” my ASS cameron
meeks: holy shit
pitts: okay but does anyone understand the chemistry homework today??
Neil: I didn’t doubt you for a second!!
Cameron: bull.
Todd: out of respect for u, i won’t spill.
Cameron: shit.
Todd: be aware of how bad this could have gone
meeks: what the FUCK is happening
nuwanda: wait so you aren’t dating??
Cameron: are you referring to the thing or the Thing ?
Neil: ?
Todd: oh the thing!!! i would never with the Thing
Cameron: right okay
knox: i’m so lost.
nuwanda: silence, hetero
knox: you were JUST flirting with me
meeks: i’m so curious,,,,, @Todd how are you a secret badass ????
Todd: i’m not actually lol
Todd: i’m just quiet so people forget i’m there and talk about stuff
Todd: plus idk i like talking to nice people? like the janitor and professor laurence and uhhh jameson
nuwanda: who???????
Todd: xe work at the front desk :) very nice person
Cameron: fuck. and xe have all the school records
Todd: that also :)))
nuwanda: oh my god
Todd: but i’m not like some sort of super spy
meeks: u trade in information
pitts: i was gonna say
Todd: everyone thinks i’m super cool now but i’m literally just a guy
Neil: it’s so hard to forget what a genuinely good person you are
Cameron: oh my god
Todd: xodmcm
Todd: hand slipped sorry hahah
meeks: twice now
Todd: i need to go for reasons lol
pitts: DOES ANYONE UNDERSTAND THE CHEMISTRY HOMEWORK
nuwanda: pitTS WERE BUG DUMB NO WE DONT
Cameron: yeah i get it, i’ll facetime you
nuwanda: facetime
Cameron: yeah?
nuwanda: you are IMPOSSIBLE to get a read on
meeks: do u think todd has any dirt on US ?
pitts: oh definitely
Cameron: can confirm
Neil: You guys think Todd has information against the United States of America??
Cameron: Neil…
Keating English Period 4
Neil: GREAT NEWS GUYS!!!
Neil: I found Mr. Keating’s yearbook and he was in this club called the Dead Poets Society?
Neil: So i asked him about it and he said they had to pretend the GSA was a book club
nuwanda: i KNEW keating was queer
meeks: u say that about everyone u vaguely like
pitts: vibes
nuwanda: vibes are REAL
Neil: We should start it again!!
Cameron: you want to start a GSA?
Neil: Yeah!
nuwanda: i am SO in
meeks: as long as it’s not thursdays, sure
Cameron: wait is it a poetry club or a GSA?
nuwanda: can it be both :D
Neil: It can totally be both!
pitts: i am failing math rn so idk if i can
meeks: oh i can help :) cmonnnnn
pitts: :) sure okay!
Cameron: yeah that sounds cool
nuwanda: u don’t HAVE to come, richard
Cameron: i mean okay but i want to
nuwanda: i’m just saying it’s the GSA so it’ll be very queer probably
Cameron: uh yeah i’m aware?
Neil: How come you asked CAMERON if he was comfortable around queer people??
nuwanda: he’s straight
meeks: aw jeez
Cameron: okay first of all, people can be straight and still not homophobic
Neil: Yeah! I’m straight and i’m totally cool with queer folks
pitts: aww jeez
nuwanda: @Cameron and second of all?
knox: idk if i should do the club…
meeks: trust me knox, no one is gonna think ur gay
nuwanda: women love poetry!!
knox: yeah?
nuwanda: one hundo percent
knox: cool, then i’m in :D
Neil: Awesome!!!
meeks: don’t u need to talk to the faculty to get an advisor or something?
nuwanda: why would we do this school sanctioned if we have the choice to not do that
pitts: hmm.
Cameron: i mean fair enough
Neil: I have the coolest hangout spot for this ever okay
Neil: Meet outside the public park Saturday at 11:00 pm.
pitts: cooool. the middle of the night. okay.
nuwanda: i am SO IN.
Neil: I think it’ll be cool!!
meeks: for the aesthetic, pitts <3
Cameron: sure okay
knox: works for me :)
Neil: :D
Private Message: Neil > Todd
Neil: Hey are you going to the meeting Saturday?
Todd: oh probably not haha
Todd: i don’t like public speaking so much.
Neil: That’s fine!
Todd: yeah i know just uhhh
Todd: public socialization is also not rly my thing
Neil: You can just be uhh secretary! Keep the minutes :)
Neil: Obviously you don’t need to come if you don’t want to but i'd love to have you there.
Todd: uhh okay.
Todd: sure okay! yeah
Neil: :D Awesome!!
Todd: :)