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***
''When will you finally marry someone?'' Wilhelm asked one night at the nearly-barren dinner table, Erik turned up his nose at his younger brother's question.
''When I find the right one.'' He answered, and scraped the excess of the broccoli-soup onto his spoon.
''What about that Simone, huh?'' Wilhelm asked as he displayed a wide grin and leaned back in his chair.
Erik chuckled and thrusted his foot against the one of his younger brother's under the table as a response, while holding onto his own chair for support.
''Or… Emmy? What happened to her?'' Wilhelm snorted.
Erik shook his head while puffing out all the air he had breathed in from laughing, ''Wilhelm—'' He brought out.
''They are all practically at your feet, you can choose.'' Wilhelm said and raised his eyebrows at the crown-prince.
''It's not only about who I like,'' Erik said, he played with the spoon in the empty bowl in front of him. ''The people need to like her as well, it will be their queen after all.''
Wilhelm looked at him, his face shiny. ''Well fuck the people—''
''Wilhelm!''
''You are the one who would need to marry her!''
Erik snickered and shoved the now-empty bowl to the middle of the table, ''You should be glad mom isn't here.'' He stated.
Wilhelm raised his voice: ''Oh Wilhelm, stop using such atrocious language!'' He mocked whilst holding his hands up in the air making useless gestures.
Erik turned away to his side so he could burst into more laughter, ''When will you marry, Wilhelm?'' He asked, still tittering.
Wilhelm scrunched his nose, marriage. ''Hopefully not soon,'' He said, ''I surely hope you'll marry before I do.''
''Have you met any lucky ladies yet, Willy?'' Erik teased, and delivered the young prince a wink.
Wilhelm stayed quiet and shook his head no in acknowledgment of Erik's question. A smirk was still on Wilhelm's face, but his eyes were studying the tiled floor. Erik can't know, what thoughts of disgust could possibly roar through his mind when once he did. Wilhelm would turn into even more of a disappointment to his family than he already was. God, he was glad Erik would take the throne. He would be disastrous.
Erik cleared his throat and spoke: ''A boy is okay too, you know.''
Wilhelm pressed his lips into a line, his sight avoided his brother's face. ''Yeah, I know.''
***
What did Wilhelm do to deserve Simon.
What did he do that now he gets to look at him anytime of day and see him flash that same playful grin. Or when Wilhelm throws loving glances in Simon's way and with a blush on his face he looks away while smiling to himself. Or when he would carefully caress his fingers with his own when standing next to each other, both of them would then need to fight the urge to intertwine their hands.
It was all too good to be true.
Way too good.
That's what Wilhelm thought as Simon's lips pressed to his neck once again. Madness ensued through his veins. Wilhelm's hands wandered across Simon's chest, gripping his shirt. Up, up… Wilhelm murmured into Simon's neck and kissed the sweet spot behind his ear. They were holding on for the sake of their own lives.
Simon's room wasn't big, wasn't small… Just enough to comfortably fit both of them. Posters were taped to the wall, the bedsheets were hazardously thrown over the mattress and books were scattered on every dresser and plank that was in sight.
Up… Wilhelm repeated, and finally Simon separated his lips from Wilhelm's neck and let him pull the shirt over his head. Wilhelm pressed a kiss on the boy's forehead. He threw his arms over Simon's naked shoulders and took a flash of a breath to look at him, really look at him. His eyes that glistered with lust, his lashes that were long and elegant, his sublime nose, his sharp as shattered-glass cheekbones… His lips. Wilhelm licked his own and gave Simon a sloppy peck on the dainty skin.
A low growl escaped from deep within Simon's throat. A hurricane of caresses fell over every centimeter of them— each kiss grew more desperate, more demanding. Simon's fingers scoured his neck, the name of the new crown-prince fell from his lips in a confessional mantra. Way too good…
Even if Wilhelm had forgotten to put on deodorant before he left and even if the television in Simon's room roared with zombie sound-effects, it was perfect, it was pearlescent passion. It was the unconditional love Wilhelm had secretly dreamed of when he was younger. He would roam the palace halls with desires that had formed after watching the movie about a blond haired princess that fell into a century-long nap, but he had dreamed of the handsome prince. Not the cutesy princess that the prince had to safe. Simon was his prince and he was allowed to kiss him out of his sleep whenever he liked.
Simon chuckled at Wilhelm's clumsy attempt to pull his shirt over his head. This time, Simon threw his arms over Wilhelm's shoulders, Wilhelm laced his around Simon's middle. They pressed their foreheads together, way too good… The other's breath warmed their cheeks. Wilhelm closed his eyes and caressed Simon's face. He traced all his features, his eyebrows, his nose, his lips… he lingered around his lips. His thumb sliding over his top-lip, then bottom-lip. He continued to make his way down and placed his thumb on his chin which he held, between his index finger and his thumb.
Wilhelm opened his eyes, Simon had closed his. He smiled, they both did.
One more kiss, maybe two—
''Boys!'' was yelled from the hallway, ''Dinner is ready!''
They were thrown out of their trance, Simon opened his eyes and Wilhelm freed his arms from around his hips. Simon shook his head, unbelievable. Wilhelm threw him a cheeky grin.
''Oh, shut up.'' Simon said and picked up both shirts off the floor, trying to make out which was his.
***
''How old are you, Mara?'' The queen asked after swallowing a fork full of mashed potatoes.
''Twenty-three, currently. My birthday is next month.'' The girl smiled, and threw a glance in Erik's direction with eyes that were bright, glossy.
''I'll make sure to not forget it,'' Erik said in a soft tone, ''It would be a shame to not remember your first birthday together.''
Wilhelm looked at his brother, his brother who had been radiating glow ever since he had greeted the brunette girl at the door. His brother who stroke this stranger's face whenever he got the chance. His brother who kept making foolish promises to this girl he only recently started dating.
''What do you do in your free-time, Wilhelm?'' Mara asked, and eyed the younger prince who hadn't said a word except a monotone ''nice to meet you'' when she had entered the palace.
''School takes up most of my time.'' He answered.
''And besides that? Any hobbies?'' She asked over a sip of wine.
Wilhelm gritted his teeth, ''I didn't know this was an investigation.''
''Wilhelm likes to game, and he plays the piano.'' Erik answered, and skimmed his fingertips along his jawline. ''You should play for Mara sometime, Wilhelm.''
''Sure.''
Mara nodded in agreement, ''I'd love that. It's so nice to finally get to know you, Wilhelm. Erik told lots about you.'' She snook a look at Erik again, ''Only positive, of course.''
Wilhelm raised his eyebrows, he smirked at his brother. ''Did he really?''
Erik cleared his throat, and grabbed Mara's hand that was resting on the table. ''The cooks surpassed themselves again.'' He said.
***
The round dinner table in Simon's house had already been set up when the two teens left Simon's room, Sara was already seated but their mom was still rushing in-and-out of the kitchen. Simon noticed immediately, mom had used the nice dishes and the new silverware. She even pulled out some alcohol free wine she saved for special occasions so Sara and he could also celebrate in the good old fashioned way. Like when he had gotten the scholarship to Hillerska. But it was very clear that the wine had been watered down.
''I'm sorry it's so simple, it's the best I could do at such a short notice.'' Simon's mom told Wilhelm when she scooped him a plate of her home-made chili.
''Oh no, it's lovely.'' Wilhelm told her while rubbing his hands on the legs of his trousers. He took a good look at the inside of the house, Simon had almost immediately pulled him into his room when he had entered. The living-dining room of the house was lit with warm, orange light. It smelled like old carpets and cheap toilet cleaner. It was perfect.
Simon's mom pressed a hand to her cheek to hide her trembling chin, ''I just thought, with the food in the palace that this would be—''
''No, no, that's different. I like this more.'' He picked up his fork, and smiling took a bite of the home-cooked meal. Simon's mom puffed out her chest and took her own seat, taking a well-deserved sip of the watered down wine.
''How are things at school, Simon?'' She asked, warmly.
Simon raised his eyebrows and sighed, ''Good.''
''And you Wilhelm, do you like Hillerska?''
Wilhelm looked up, ''It's okay, I like it.''
Simon's mom nodded, and picked up her own fork. It was quiet, besides the sound of utensils scraping the porcelain plates and food being swallowed. It was a snug silence, not like the uncomfortable sound in the palace where the ceilings were so high it echoed all sounds and where butlers stood at all entrances that uncomfortably coughed on occasion. This felt like a home, a real home. It wasn't thoroughly cleaned, there weren't any century old paintings, no one was formally dressed. Wilhelm smiled to himself.
Simon noticed and tilted his head to the right, ''You alright?'' he whispered in Wilhelm's direction.
Wilhelm nodded, his left hand slowly placing itself on Simon's knee. His thumb carefully circled as he made his way to his thigh while trying to not make their secret touch clear to neither Simon's mom nor Sara. Simon was picking at the material of his shirt while grinning, ear to ear. Tensely, he shoved another fork full of chili inside, his hand slowly covering Wilhelm's. Their fingers played a silent game of cat and mouse, every touch send an electric shock starting in the hand all the way to their faces that ended up being red and flushed.
From the other side of the table, Sara stiffened her posture. ''It's weird seeing Simon like this.'' She said, lips parting.
Simon pulled back his hand, ''Like what?'' He asked whilst sucking in his cheeks.
Sara drew in air, ''In love.'' She answered.
Wilhelm also pulled back his hand with a stiff motion, he attempted covering his even redder face with his hair. Simon struggled to find the right words, there weren't any. He glared at his sister, his body tensed up. Wilhelm couldn't swallow the food that he had enjoyed so much before. Memories flooded him, he had said the same thing once as well. To Erik. To his brother. His amazing, loving brother who wasn't with him anymore.
***
Wilhelm stood in front of the window in the lengthy hallway that led to the dining-room, and other multiple doors leading to bathrooms, music-rooms, libraries... As soon as he had shoved the strawberry pie inside, he had excused himself from the table. Mara was a nice girl, she would make a good queen. She had everything Erik required. Well, more like what their parents required. Young, good-looking, rich, well-behaved and a girl that Erik loved.
Wilhelm sighed, his brother seemed different. He had shown a side he didn't know Erik could have. Blushy, touchy and whimsical Erik. Simone had never made him like this, Emmy also hadn't. He would smile at them, sure, but it was nowhere near the loving smiles he would grand Mara.
''Wilhelm!''
Wilhelm turned to his sigh, with a slight jog, Erik made his way through the hallway. He turned to the window again.
''Wilhelm,'' Erik said breathy, ''I know you don't like Mara—''
''It's not that I don't like her,'' Wilhelm said, he kept his face towards the window, ''It's so weird seeing you like that.''
''Like what?''
Wilhelm groaned, ''So… So, so romantic? Lovesick?''
Erik sighed, and placed a hand on his shoulder. ''I get that.''
''It's disgusting.''
''Just wait 'till you find a girl—'' Erik breathed in, ''Someone. Someone you like so much you will get so tender that I would have to tell you to stop.''
Wilhelm offered him a bemused smile, ''Never.''
''Promise me one thing,'' Erik said, Wilhelm nodded. ''When you do, I want to be the first person to meet her— him.''
Wilhelm hummed, ''Sure.''
Erik snorted, ''I can't wait to see you love someone else so much you want to show them off to me.''
Wilhelm displayed a wide grin, his eyebrows raised. ''Like you have with Mara?''
Erik lowered his hands off of Wilhelm's shoulder, a smile occupying his face. ''Let's go back, yeah?''
***
After all the plates had been cleared, and all the wine glasses were emptied, Simon's mom gracefully offered to clear the table while pushing Wilhelm and Simon back into his room. Both Simon and Wilhelm still had the red flush creeping across his cheeks from the comment Sara made earlier at dinner. Simon dropped down on his bed and puffed out his chest like the big bad wolf in the fairytale of the three little pigs. Twice, he slapped the empty spot beside him, demanding Wilhelm to sit next to him.
Wilhelm slid down as well, and first thing, placed his head on Simon's shoulder and rubbed Simon's knee. The young prince hadn't been very talkative the entire dinner, he wish he had since the small family was enjoyable to be around. But nothing was able to come out of his seemingly non-existing voice-box the entire dinner. Simon ruffled through Wilhelm's hair, he melted into his touch.
''You've been quiet,'' Simon said, his eyebrows drew together.
Wilhelm simply hummed and hid his forehead into the comfortable spot of Simon's neck.
Simon clasped their hands together, ''Is it about what Sara said earlier?''
Wilhelm hummed again.
''Well—'' Simon started in a soft tone, ''At least it's clear how much I like you.''
Wilhelm chuckled softly, ''It's not just about that.''
''What else then?''
Wilhelm freed himself from the warm, safe spot in Simon's neck. ''It's just— It's that… It's about my brother.''
''Oh,'' Simon said, he looked the boy in his eyes. The memories of Wilhelm being a ghost at school the days after Erik had died were burned into his mind, ''Do you wanna talk about it?''
Wilhelm shook his head and returned to their former position, he looked for the safety he had lost. Simon rubbed Wilhelm's back in circle-like motions, he bit his lip. ''You sure?''
Wilhelm drew in air and let it out in a heavy sigh and hid his face even more in Simon's neck. ''I had promised my brother… I had promised he would be the first one to meet you.'' He murmured into his neck, the burning in his nostrils and the salt being rubbed into his eyes returned after days he had spend clean.
''Me?''
''Yeah… He said that when I'd meet someone I like so much that he would want to be the first to meet them.''
''Oh.''
''And now he's dead and he never got to meet you.''
Simon pressed his cheek on top of Wilhelm's head, his fingers tangled around his neck. How could he comfort someone going through a glorified hell when he was a fool at dealing his own emotions? ''Well, they always say loved ones never really die, right?''
Wilhelm hummed.
''So, technically, I could still meet him.''
Wilhelm huffed and looked up, ''What do you mean?''
Simon cleared his throat: ''Hello Wilhelm's brother— Erik was it? My name is Simon—'' He spoke to the air.
Wilhelm let out a mocking laugh, ''This is ridiculous.''
Simon scrunched up his nose, not satisfied. So he rapidly continues: ''Yes, Wilhelm treats me well. Yes, I like him very much—''
Wilhelm bit the inside of his cheek, he had to stop a smile from forming on his lips.
''Yes, yes… I think Wilhelm also really likes me…''
A laugh formed in the back of Wilhelm's throat, a genuine loving laugh. One that he always saved for Erik, one that he didn't like to show to others. But maybe, Erik was actually present. In a way. Physical or not, Erik was with them in the room in his memory. Erik had always been predictable, Wilhelm could fill in the blanks of the conversation without effort.
''Hm, yes. Wilhelm does get very touchy sometimes…''
Wilhelm snorted his nose and wrapped his arms around Simon's neck, placing his head on his shoulder. ''Really?'' He asked, teasingly.
Simon faced him, ''Yes.'' He said, he stared at Wilhelm's lips. They leaned in together like swings, gifting the other a quick jab.
Wilhelm shuffled closer onto the bed and leaned down on Simon's head, ''Erik would've liked you.'' He said.
''Hm—'' Simon hummed, ''Genuine?''
Wilhelm nodded into his hair and planted a kiss, ''Yep,'' he answered, ''But not as much as I do of course.''
Simon scuffed, and intertwined their hands. A wide grin took over his face, he was maddeningly and wholly in love with the prince of Sweden.