Chapter Text
"How's the world altering poetry comin' along?" Neil asked, drumming his hands on Todd's ass.
Todd weakly swatted him away with the wooden spoon he was stirring pasta with. "Shut up. It's not world altering."
"Mmm." Neil popped a cherry tomato in his mouth and hoisted himself on the countertop. "Au contraire, my dear beloved. I would argue it is.” He tilted his head to the side. “Come on, give yourself some credit."
"Uh huh." Todd glanced over with a small smile. When Neil stuck his tongue out at him, Todd rolled his eyes and turned back to making their dinner. "How was your day?"
"Great! Rehearsal was just a lot of reading scripts, nothing too exciting. Oh! That reminds me!" He hopped down and left the kitchen. "I got something for you! I almost forgot!" He returned with a paper bag. He pulled out a small bouquet of lavender. "Pour toi." He handed them over.
Todd grinned, accepting the flowers. Their perfume was sweet. "These are beautiful, thank you." He grabbed a cup from the cupboard to fill with water and place the flowers in. "What's the occasion?"
Neil shrugged. "I just saw them and thought of you."
"Aww." Todd gave him a side hug with a kiss. "That's very sweet." He turned his attention back to the stove, not wanting to burn anything. "I appreciate it, Neil."
"But wait, there's more!" Neil reached into the bag again, retrieving a box of chocolates and a new notebook.
Todd gave him a questioning look, smile fading. "Okay, now I'm suspicious. What's this?"
"Nothing, I swear! You were just on my mind today, I suppose." He went behind Todd, wrapping his arms around his waist. He kissed his neck before resting his chin on his shoulder, watching him cook. "I love you."
"I love you, too. This is done." He rubbed his face then clicked off the stove. He unhooked Neil's arms to get plates. "You can go sit. Do you want some wine?"
"Sure." Neil took a seat at the table. He supported his head with his hand and admired Todd as he dished them up. "Todd?"
"Hmm?" He came over with Neil's plate and empty cup. He went back to grab the bottle of wine and silverware.
"I just…" He watched him grab his own plate and cup before sitting down next to him. "I don't know."
"What?" Todd looked up at him after pouring them wine.
"I don't know. I love you a lot."
"Is there something going on, Neil?" He furrowed his eyebrows, folding his hands in his lap. "What is it? Are you okay?" Each question grew more worried.
Neil gave him a reassuring smile. "I'm okay. Everything's alright, I promise. I just feel like we're both busy and I don't appreciate you enough."
"It's okay." Todd didn't look any less concerned. "There's something else, isn't there?"
Neil's smile faded as he poked at his food. "I saw my dad today," he said faintly.
"What?" His voice rose. "When? Why? What happened?"
"My mom called and said he had a stroke. I don't know, Todd, I just felt bad. So, I went up to the hospital. He hardly said anything to me and I didn't stay long. It's just strange… He hasn't spoken to me in years but I feel like it's my fault."
"It's not," Todd interjected.
"I know. But…" He shrugged with a sigh.
"What'd he say? Your dad?"
"He asked about you." He wouldn't raise his eyes. "I mean, he asked if I was still with you. When I said yes, he refused to talk to me anymore."
Understanding replaced the bitter look on Todd's face. He reached out and squeezed Neil's hand. "I'm sorry."
"It's okay. You know I will always choose you over him."
"I'm still sorry."
Neil brought Todd's hand to his lips, kissing it gently. "Thank you." He took a breath and smiled. "And thank you for dinner! This looks great!" He twirled noodles around his fork and took a bite. "Mm! You add lemon?"
Todd nodded, still looking upset. He pursed his lips but decided not to say anything further and began eating.
"Delicious! So, anyways, you have that party on Saturday to go to, right?"
"It's not really a party." Todd shrugged.
"What would you call it then?"
"Mm. A dumb event my manager is making me go to for some reason in which I know I'll be miserable."
Neil chuckled. "I'm sure it won't be that bad."
"At least I can drag you along." He smiled faintly. "You can come, right?"
"Of course. I would never leave you to suffer alone."
"Great, you can suffer, too."
"Great! I'm looking forward to it!"
After eating and cleaning up, the two sat on their fire escape with cigarettes and more wine. Todd laid down, resting his head in Neil's lap. Neil stroked his hair, occasionally twirling it around his finger.
The sun was going down, making the sky orange and pink and purple over the cityscape. The street below was busy, as it always was. Drunken shouts could be heard.
"You never answered my question," Neil eventually mumbled.
"What question?"
"About your poetry? How's it going?"
"Mm." Todd shut his eyes. "Alright. Some days are just better than others."
"How was today?"
"Not one of the better. I don't know. I sometimes convince myself that it'll never live up to my first book and people will be disappointed so I get caught up in my head and it's hard to write."
"That's not true. You're brilliant. No one could ever be disappointed in you. And if, for some bizzare reason, they are, fuck 'em! Right?"
A smile crept onto Todd's lips. "Right. Fuck 'em."
"There you go. Exactly."
There was a meow at the window sill before a cat jumped out to join them. It was a white cat with orange on his ears and tail. He curled up on Todd's chest.
"Hey, Oscar," Todd mumbled, scratching below his chin.
Neil reached over to pet him as well. There was a warm feeling spreading in his chest. He grinned. "I am so happy," he stated quietly.