Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Once upon a time, a demonic princess thought that the souls of hell could be redeemed. Guess what it fucking worked, soon sinner after sinner was being redeemed and sent to heaven.

But a question must be asked, what happens if a born demon gained redemption? Well no one knows, but who cares, the point of redemption is to get back on gods good graces. We all know that demons were never on gods good side.

Well, that was true until one day, a day like every other.

The building that holds the people who works for I.M.P, weird name for weirder demons. We have Millie an wrathful demon born for fighting. Moxxie the demon for a perfect shot. Loona an hellhound with common sense. Stolas a royal demon who has a lusty approach to love and Blitzo the O is silent, the demon who had this crazy idea in the first place.

We look into the building and see a meeting is happening. “Okay everyone first things first, how’s everyone doing?” Said our main guy of the story (cough Blitzo cough).

A jolly tune starts playing.

“Blitz, you know how everyone is doing because you ask us before the meetings.” Said a demon who sounds like our favourite space boy.

“Mox, you know that Blitz just does that for fun.” Said the wife of the psychonaut

“Yeah fatty, just suck it up and tell the man.” Said the simp collecting wolf.

“Well, Blitzy I for one am doing great, hope you feel the same.” Said our softest owl.

“Let’s begin with… what’s happening with my hand?” We watch as Blitzo’s hand begin to light up with sparks of the holy flame, the beginnings of something.

“What do you mean darling?” Said the owl who’s dating the boss, he got up and looked at his hand. “N-no, this can’t be, this should be impossible.”

“Uh what’s impossible?” Asked the black horned girl.

Moxxie and Loona takes a quick look and say at the same time. “HOLY FUCK!”

“T-this, but why Blitz, out of all of us.” Said the singing demon.

“No, no, no… please god don’t take him.” Said a hound who doesn’t want her father to go.

“What’s happening!” Asked the guy that this happening to.

Those who knows just looked at him and each other wondering who should break it to him. After a couple of seconds, Moxxie spoke “Blitz, what’s happening is that… is that you’re being redeemed.”

Blitz just stood there shocked wondering why him, he killed people, he got a couple to divorce, he took drugs and he was a fucking dick. He knew this, everyone knew this… except god he guessed.

His body started to change, five fingers instead of 4 with horns and tail starting to disappear.

“Bli-no dad please don’t go… Please don’t go.” Loona started to beg, she was in tears. Blitzo gained human skin.

“Wait, th-this is a joke right, this shouldn’t be possible.” Millie was in shock and denying this was happening. Blitzo grew hair of a strange colour.

As this went on Stolas did nothing but simply cry, because the one he truly loved was going to taken from him. He walked up to his boyfriend and hugged him, he whispers. “In love and lost, I will find you again, could be for a million years or one. But nothing can keep me from you.” Stolas was breaking and was Blitzo, so all they did was kiss for a good bye.

Blitzo now looked fully human, he had freckles and green eyes, he looked scrawny yet muscly, he looked kind as a sheep.

Blitzo in a flash of light, had disappeared, leaving everyone alone and in pain.

As the sounds of a grieving family disappears, the sounds of a baby being born appears.

As doctors begin to prepare the baby to be held, the father of the boy burst in, he went to his wife and asked. “Inko, I’m here, I made it back home just in time.” Said a scientist named Hisashi.

“Hi darling, I’m sorry if I can’t be that mushy at the moment heh.” Said a mother who needs sleep.

“It’s okay, I just want to meet my son and spend time with you.” Said the brand new father.

Then doctors walk in holding a silent newborn, they gave the boy to the mother.

“He has your eyes darling.” Said the mother.

“I think he’ll have your hair honey.” The man said.

“What do you think we should name him?”

“Hmm. I know how about Izuku.”

“I think it’s beautiful.”

As this was going on, the baby true mind has one last thought until years later. ‘I prefer Blitz.’

Chapter Text

Now we’re here around 14 years later on top of a roof. On it we see, a green teen shocked and empty with a blond skeleton that seems to produce smoke.

“Remember kid, it’s okay to dream but make sure that the dream is realistic.” Then the blond skeleton left with a bottle of living sludge and leaving the teen feeling nothing but despair.

Midoriya Izuku born without power in a world of gods, he had nothing, his father left physically and his mother left emotionally, starting to become into physical. His childhood best friend now Japan’s biggest bully… and now the number one hero All Might himself, is now like the others to him.

Midoriya looked at edge thinking if he should follow the advice from his old friend like he had multiple times. But once again a voice stopped him coming from unknown spot calling him by a different name but he knew it was meant for him.

The voices were different everytime but it seemed like it came from someone who could relate to him. At first it was a girl who sounded like child who was begging him not to go. The second came from a man who seems to be someone could depend his life on, he said like why him out of all people. The third was a woman who felt like a great protector asked if this was a joke.

But now at his fourth and honestly most tempting, he heard a voice that he considers to be from an angel he could barely hear it but could all the same.

It said. “In love and lost, I will find you again, could be for a million years or one. But nothing can keep me from you.”

Now at this moment Midoriya knew, who Blitz was and why these voices cared for him.

He is one helluva boss, memories of the past soon came back. The first mission where Moxxie killed a family. The time where he bodyguarded Stolas and his daughter. The bet where in the end he learned to be less protective of Loona. The festival where he learned to trust Moxxie with his life. The kidnapping where he learned that he could love and who he love.

After all this happened, Izuku faded away he became Deku but Blitz is back and he has a couple of missions.

First is to train.

Second is to honour the dreams of his second life.

Third and finally, it could either the hardest or easiest one but it will happen before the year is done.

GET BACK HOME!

Chapter Text

Blitzo had a lot to think about while walking to his house like the fact he has two lives in his head, he’s pretty sure Moxxie recommended something like this. He doesn’t know but he also ponders if he should continue to be Izuku or resurrect Blitzo.

If he continues then people won’t care what he does and he can try to open a portal between realms. But if he chooses to be Blitzo in the real world then less people world try and fuck with him, maybe he doesn’t know.

While walking he see’s something he shouldn’t have, attempted something for this angle Blitzo assumed it was what he thought it was. Blitzo hating crimes like these especially what came close to happening at the festival with Striker and Moxxie. Blitzo ran to the two seeing more and more of what’s happening.

Blitzo hates it when he’s right, then Blitzo honouring Izuku ran in and punched the fatass creep in the face. The creep stumbled and fell, but Blitzo made sure that the monster couldn’t get a move in. He continued to punch and kick but then the creep activated his quirk.

He let a field of something that pushed back Blitzo. “You shouldn’t have intervened, now you’re my lunch.” As the creep walked forward rubbish and pebbles started to disappear with the creep starting to grow bigger in width.

Blitzo knowing that he can’t win this right now, he grabbed the girl and carried her on his back. He ran fast and he noticed what the girl looked like, she had hair made out vines and looked like she be a strict mother. Running out of energy Blitzo stopped and looked around in case the man followed them, they didn’t.

He looked at the girl notices a few more details, she wore clothes that made him think that she lived in a religious village and a yellow cross. ‘Well, I guess the cross doesn’t affect me anymore.’ “Ya okay miss, I hope he didn’t get far… he didn’t right?”

“No, no he didn’t, I’m just… I’m just… I don’t know, what do I even do?” Asked the religious girl clearly not being told what to do in case this happened.

“Well first, do you know him.” He knew it was police first but his parent and assassin instincts kicked in.

“Yes, I do he is… or was my priest.” Her words made Blitzo desire blood from the creep.

‘I’ll fucking kill him and rip his dick off!’ “Okay, okay… now we go to the police.” He said this like a parent trying to protect their kid.

“But I shouldn’t, he’s priest of the holy, surely it’s right.” This made Blitzo realise that she’s in a cult and that she was groomed.

“No!” He said that with a bit of anger. “Oh sorry, what I mean is you should tell the police. It will be hard but if you report this, it might be able to help others.” Dear god he hoped that there was no others.

“But he’s a holy ma-“ “No, he isn’t by Satan he is the farthest from god.” He said interrupting the girl.

The girl was clearly having her world view being broken and built up different. “It’s okay, I’ll be here for you. Here let me get up back up.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her up.

“Oh almost forgot if we’re gonna be doing this I kinda need your name.” The girl looked a bit confused before she realised that they were in fact strangers.

“My name is Shiozaki Ibara but I think you can call me Ibara.” This caught Blitzo off guard for a second before he realised that in Japan it’s surname first.

He then realised that he should tell her his name but he doesn’t want to called Midoriya or Izuku. “Name is Midoriya Izuku but please call me Blitz and the O is silent.” Ibara nodded confused about the O.

In silence they walked to the closest police station, he comforted her along the way saying that while this could be hard it can help a lot of people and that it might inspire people to do the same.

When they reached there and walked in, they saw the creep saying. “Please help me find my student she was kidnapped.” This was being said to a cop who looked like he was in the 90s in that get up.

The policeman said that he would help but before the creep could give the description of the two. Blitzo and Ibara buts in, mostly Blitzo. “She was not kidnapped.”

The two adults looks over and see the two. “That’s the man who kidnapped her, arrest him immediately.” Demanded the creep but before the cop say that wasn’t how it works, Ibara says. “I wasn’t kidnapped.”

The creep looked shocked and angry, the cop then decided that he should speak. “It seems that we need to get the three of you into questioning.” The two kids agreed immediately, Ibara after she heard Blitzo agree figuring that it must be a good thing. The creep was reluctant to agreeing.

They were sent into 3 different rooms, The creep looked impatient like he was child wanting to get his toy back but knew he had to wait. Blitzo was calm and collected he’s been in worse interrogations. Ibara was spooked and scared, she felt she needed someone to stand by her like a parent or something.

(We make this simple and do the interrogations at the same time. Each question will have three answers, it’ll be in this order the whole time. 1st the creep, 2nd Blitz, 3rd Ibara. But that won’t stop me from making funny comments.)

The detective walked in and said. “Hello, I am Tsukauchi Naomasa, call me Truman for short.”

“Fine let’s just start so my lamb can be back with the Shepard.” Said a liar who’s smart with their words. “Okay sir.”

“A nickname! Samesies we could be nickname twins.” Said our best boy. “Maybe later, let’s start.”

“H-hello T-Truman, I hope we aren’t bothering you.” Said the kid said anxiously. “You aren’t bothering me ma’am let’s begin.”

“First, what’s your name and age?”

“Adam Abraham, 46.” The creep name’s finally revealed bonus points if you get why his name is that. “Okay next question.”

“Midoriya Izuku but call me Blitz the O is silent and I’m 14.” This confuses Truman “What O, Blitz.” “Exactly.” This was said with a smirk. “Let’s continue.”

“Shiozaki Ibara and 14.” She started to feel guilty but remembers that if she wants to be a hero, she needs to do this. “Lovely name, ok next question.”

“What’s your quirk and what does it do?”

“Garden of Eden, it activates a 10cm force field which consumes everything but the things on my person.” This intrigued Truman for it matched the profile for a series of murders. “Hmm, next is.”

“Hehehehehe, hahahahahaha HAHAHAHAHAHA!” The laughing was heard by the other two scaring both of them. “Sorry, sorry it’s just that, I don’t have one.” This caught Truman off guard. “Wait really.” “Oh yeah.” “Huh, never met someone quirkless before, continuing.”

“It’s called Vines, it can grow and move to my will, it can also regrow if ripped off.” Truman wondered if she’s a good fit for something but decides she isn’t. “Sounds useful, what’s next is.”

“Anyone we can call in case of emergency?”

“My church, it’ll help me.” Said the slimy bootleg snake. “Now and finally.”

Blitzo stayed quiet for a while until he said “No one.” This shocked the detective because he thought with how well this kid is put together he had someone for help. “O-okay then, last question.”

“I-I don’t know now.” Ibara was an orphan who only had the priest for support but now… wait she knows someone. “Wait, actually it’s Blitz.” This caught the detective off guard, Because he figured that those two aren’t dating, he had to ask. “Are you dating him?” “O-oh no no no, I’m not, he feels more like fath…” she realised that she sees blitzo as a father. ‘How can someone I just met, be someone I trust so much’ (touch starved). “Anyways next and final question.

“What happened?”

“Well, I was just walking down the street with my students, when all of a sudden the green haired boy punches me and tried to beat me up, and when I defended myself he stopped and took Shiozaki.” This seems off to Truman because he was using his lie detector quirk.

The other two responded with the exact same story, but he learned what lead up to it from Shiozaki. “He asked me to join him to help with food and medicine shopping… after we finished. H-he took me to an alley and he pushed me down, talking about how he should get what he deserves.” Before she continues Truman stops her. “You can stop now, I have what I need now.”

Someone with a cat head notices that Truman is done with the questioning and goes up to him “Hey Truman, what are we gonna do?”

“We are going to arrest that man and help that girl.”

Chapter Text

As he said that the police cat named Tamakawa Sansa just nodded and went to help with starting the process. While Truman just sits down in his chair just wondering about something else.

Let’s me tell you how his quirk works. It’s called Lie Detector, it does what you think it does but when someone tells a lie to him he sees the colour red but when it’s the truth it’s green.

When he asked Blitzo his name and age, he saw both green and red as if both answers were the truth and a lie.

This never happened before, he searched for Midoriya Izuku profile. He found it but it was… weird.

Midoriya Izuku.

Hair - Green.

Eyes - Green.

Birthday - July 16th.

Parents

• Midoriya Hisashi - Alive (gave up parental rights, 10 years ago).
• Midoriya Inko - Alive (gave up parental rights, 3 hours ago).

Quirk - Quirkless.

Medical Record - Age 4 Quirk Doctor, Age 5 Hospital, Age 6 Hospital, Age 7 Hospital, Age 8 Hospital, Age 9 Hospital, Age 10 Hospital.

School - Aldera Middle School.

Criminal Record - None.

Truman found this heartbreaking. It seems his mother abandoned him while he was at school, he knew the only reason why she got away with this is because he’s quirkless. Seems this kid is now by default an adult.

He walked back into the room with Blitzo. He saw that Blitzo was staring directly at a wall, the wall shared by this room and the one holding Adam… he decided to ignore this. “Hey Blitz.”

“Oh hey Truman, got a couple of more questions for me.” Truman felt like if he said something else a sex joke would be told.

“No, no… this something else, it turns out that Midoriya Inko has…” he begin to trail off in guilt for the kid.

Blitzo figuring out that Inko has finally abandoned Izuku. It hurts in Izuku’s heart and that hurts Blitzo’s heart but he realised that now he was free, free to do what he wants.

Immediately he asked “Can I change my name?”

“Oh, uh sure just wait a moment.” Truman then walks out of the room and goes to find the papers that allows name changes.

He finally returned with the papers, he gave them to Blitzo who changed his name to.

Fidem Blitzo. Blitzo hoped to take this name years ago…

Then the detective took it and asked someone to help him with this. When he returned he said. “Okay now that you have the name you wanted, any questions?”

He thought about it then he asked “Is she gonna send money or cash so I can purchase food and bills.”

Truman breathes in and out. “Probably not but there is some way for you to gain money. From what I seen, you could be a great youtuber.”

Blitzo was confused he wasn’t funny, hell he couldn’t even make a child laugh. But then he thought about his jokes, they weren’t for kids. He realised that when he was a clown he only made Wrath, Pride and Lust ring demons laugh.

“Well, I guess I better start soon if I wanna make that dough.” He rubbed his fingers together.

This made Truman chuckle a little. “Now there’s something I want.” Said the new youtuber.

“Yeah what is it?” Asked the detective.

“I want to adopt Shiozaki Ibara as soon as possible.” This shocked Truman because he didn’t think Blitzo to be a parental figure. So he left the room again with Blitzo and they walk into Ibara’s room.

“Hey Shiozaki, I got some great news for you.” Ibara was wondering what the news was, It could’ve been anything.

“Well first we’re arresting the person who almost did ‘that’ to you.” And at that time we start to hear Adam saying. “Those two are fucking liars! I would never do that at all! Arrest them not me!” This gave Ibara a sense of victory and calmness knowing that a vile person is now facing punishment. This also gave Blitzo the chuckles.

“And we have some news for your new home.” This made Ibara realise that she was now homeless.

“Well after reviewing some people, we found a person we trust that will take care of you.” Aka we only found person that you can trust right now. For the 50th time of the day we have a confused Ibara, for she had no idea that someone was already be willing to have her at their home.

Unable to keep his mouth Blitzo says “It’s me! Imma be adopting ya.” Now this is getting weird for Ibara because why would this weird ass boy be willing to help her.

So she asks her question. “May I inquire why you want to adopt me?”

“Oh simple, you have no family.” He points out a finger. “No friends from what I can tell.” He points out a second. “Social issues.” A third. “And I can teach you every swear I know.” Pointing out a 4th making him realise that he has 10 fingers now.

The two look at him and say “Only those things.” This was said at the same time. “Yeeeeeep, mostly the 4th one.” Said Blitzo making Truman see green.

“Well if it okay with then I shall be living with you now on.” Said the vine girl

They walk into the normal police area. They have some chatting like favourite food and stuff until Blitzo realised that an problem was still around for Ibara.

“Now there is one issue that I need to ask Life of Brian.” This nickname confused the girl but gave him a nod to go on but with Truman being an adult who likes comedies snorts.

“From your old home, shouldn’t we grab some clothes and stuff.”

‘Oh… I can’t believe I forgot that I still had items that isn’t on my person.’ “Yes I should Blitz or should I call you dad.” Of course Izuku was freaking about this since he had no idea If she should or not.

Blitzo just went. “Call me whatever ya want except daddy, got someone for that.” He finger gunned it as well.

This froze the entire precinct, the reactions were varied. Ibara asked what that meant. Truman and a few other cops started to laugh. Some went red and other asked if he knew what that meant. But every single criminal that heard this started to drop on the floor and wheeze, let’s just say he’s well known in prison for this now.

“Let’s just say what I said is something Midnight would say.” Ibara went ‘ahhhh’ after she was told this.

They asked Truman if he could help with moving her stuff, he said that he’ll help after his shift is over.

As they were waiting, some entered the door of police station it’s the one person that Blitzo wouldn’t hesitate to punch and he did so.

“Ow, young man what was th…” he paused after he saw who punched him.

It was that quirkless boy who knows his secret.

Chapter Text

Blitzo walks into his house with Ibara and Truman with her stuff following him. After he punched All Might in the face he took the people currently following and went to get her stuff.

On the way to his house he informed Ibara will now be Fidem which is the Latin translation of faith or hope. She was also informed that she was going to Aldera with him now but she will have to use Inko’s old uniform. After they got all the boxes in the apartment Truman had to go back to work.

So Blitzo took Inko’s old room but not before getting everything All Might out of his old room and onto EBay. The amount of All Might surprised Ibara a lot,

So she asked. “Are you a fan of All Might?” Just remember that she just escaped a cult.

“I was… but something happen so I’m not a fan anymore.” Ibara just nodded.

So everything was now sorted Ibara room looked very religious but Blitzo planned to corrupt her with his horrible taste of music. Blitzo’s room still has hero merch but no All Might, Izuku didn’t complain about the lack of All Might they both knew it was for the best.

But Blitzo remembered something, Izuku has boring taste in clothes. “Yo Ibarie. (The parent nickname has now been given.) It seems I might have to go buy some clothes, you wanna come and see if you want something?”

“Uh sure, I don’t really have that much clothes.” So they went to the mall.

They started with clothes, Blitzo immediately went to the suits. Since this shop doesn’t have his normal style, he decided to make a temporary new one. For the shoes he went with black Dada Sprewell Spinner. Trousers he went with dark grey cargos. Instead of a belt he went with suspenders with skulls that connect to the trousers. The shirt is black with white text saying ‘Fuck God.’ The coat he grabbed was red with random dark green shapes. For the gloves he chose Thanko’s Piano Gloves, he’ll give those to Moxxie after he gets his old clothes back.

Now for the accessories, for a watch he grabbed one that had a wolf on it with its paws for the clock’s hands. Found a red ring that has white and black diamonds on it. He saw hair clips that mimicked horns and was black and white. Now finally he grabbed a face mask that resembled an owl.

Ibara went with normal comfortable clothes, a watch and her own pair of the hair pins. Now I bet you’re wondering how he pays for this, he used an advance technique called Lying.

Blitzo grabbed out bags from nowhere had Ibara put her set of clothes in one of them, he put them somewhere on his person then they left. Ibara and Izuku feels a little guilty but Blitzo says that it’s payment for the horrible things in their lives and he’s bleeding it dry.

Finally after the longest day of their lives, they got home and Ibara went to bed but Blitzo didn’t. He in fact was trying to recreate the spell that travels between Earth and hell.

But let’s see does he meet his old family again or does go to school first? First person to comment which, I’ll do!

Chapter Text

Blitzo made the choice that this cannot wait, if Ibara finds out about this he’ll tell her. It’s a bit easier than coming up with random bullshit. So Blitzo had to get sorted, he grabbed a couple of candles that Inko left behind they smelled like coconuts. Some crayons from he was young Izuku, a knife that he found in a hidden spot from when he was taking all the All Might stuff out. Spare ribs that was in the fridge… he just needed the bones and finally the blood of a pained soul.

First time they needed the last ingredient they used some blood they found on the street, Sinner Demons are pained souls after all. But this time, this time it would blood that came from Blitzo or Izuku. Blitzo didn’t know if Izuku’s soul was still around.

He took the knife and sliced his wrist, the worse part about this for Blitzo was how the body already had instructions on where to cut. Right now he can’t think about it, the blood has now been spilled. Izuku instinctively went for something to cover up the scars, Blitzo did nothing to stop it.

They both then knew that they both were alive and co-existing. They decided to ponder this later once again. Blitzo had to take a big breath, he might not recognise his family or vice versa. But it’s something he had to do.

He spoke the spell that needed to be spoken at least once a year. “I call for the plane after death, life has now been faded and I desire freedom. Rip open the fabrics stitched by god and send me to the land of sin.”

Suddenly a flash of white and black appeared, a portal opened which shut doors. Izuku was confused but Blitzo forgot to think of a place in hell. Blitzo knew it wouldn’t be right to just leave Ibara alone in a new house so he went to her room and woke her up.

He nudged her. “Hey Ibarie, wake up, wake up.”

She woke up. “Huh? Oh hi Blitz, why did you wake me up?”

“Because I have some people you’ll love to meet and one of them is you’re older sister.” The parent responded.

“Wait you adopted someone else, someone older than you and me?”

“Oh yeah, forgot to mention but Hell is real, I am a Demon born there and reborn here. Also I’m an assassin.” He said more casually than normal.

“W-what, hold on you can’t just say that!”

“Well I did. Now let’s go to hell.”

They went to his room with the portal, Ibara was shocked to see magic muttering how god must be real. Blitzo just looked at her and thought. ‘She must get the muttering from Izuku.’

He asked Ibara. “So where would you like to go?”

“Hmm I want to see the person that you adult stuff with.”

“I never said that just that he called me a word that means something naughty.”

“But you do don’t you.”

“Well yes but you just don’t say it.”

Blitzo then thought where Stolas would be, he thought of the only place he would be. The portal begins to shine and now we see the bed of Stolas with him in it. Alone and crying hard, Blitzo told Ibara he would go in first.

But as he took a step into the portal, it wouldn’t let him in. He was confused for that fucking dick of a kid was able to go in. Izuku knowing the memories popped a thought, didn’t the kid die once before.

That’s the reason, the kid already died before he got in. Blitzo was shocked and Ibara was confused. Blitzo explained the situation about how he needed to be die at least once before he can get in.

Ibara felt sorry and gave a pat on the back, it did nothing to help the pain. So Blitzo decided that if he couldn’t enter the portal, he’ll scream into it.

“HEY STOLAS, WHERE IS THE CONFIDENT BOTTOM THAT LOVES ME!” This scared Ibara

Stolas looked around he didn’t know where the voice was and it may sounded different but it felt like it belonged to his true love. “B-blitzy. Where are you?” He sounded hopeful.

“Up here lover boy.” Stolas looked up and saw a greened hair boy standing next to a girl with vines for hair. “Hey, I adopted another kid and I can’t get in.”

Stolas looked up at Blitzo, it’s been years about 15 to be accurate. So he did the first thing he that came to mind. He jumped to Blitzo’s arms and giving him a lot of kisses.”

After he calmed down he said. “Blitzy I was beginning to think I’ll never find you. I searched all 6 Rings in hell to see if you were kidnapped. I asked an angel friend of mine to search in heaven for at least someone who looked like and I searched 90% of earth so far. Can I ask where are we?”

“Japan, we are in Japan.” Stolas just groaned and muttered about that was the next country he was searching.

“So you mentioned a new daughter, Is this the girl.” He pointed at Ibara.

Ibara spoke up. “Yes sir, after Blitz saved me from something I won’t mention but he said was awesome.”

“Awh how adorable you humans can be.” Stolas treated Ibara like a new puppy but to be fair, he’s like to this Loona and Octavia.

“Thank you sir.” She gave a kind smile.

“Well before this continues… Stolas I want you to bring I.M.P.” Stolas looked at him for a second, nodded and went back through the portal closing it.

Ibara just thought. ‘What did I get into.’

Chapter Text

After a while Stolas came back with the I.M.P team. They looked at Blitzo skeptically before Loona just runs and screams “DAD!” He is now being hugged by his first daughter. Then the others followed her lead and hugged the heaven out of him, Ibara and Stolas felt left out, so they joined.

“Hey everyone… man it’s nice to see you guys again.” Blitzo gaining Izuku’s pure will, lifts up everyone.

This was met with reacts, Moxxie. “It’s great to see you to sir.” Millie. “I can’t believe you got hair now.” Loona. “Of course you fucking dickhead.” Octavia. “I’m so fucking sorry that I missed that meeting.” Octavia missed that meeting because she was at demon school, no not the one with that Izuku lookalike.

After they seperate from the hug, Loona then notices someone. “Hey who’s that.”

Blitzo and Ibara looked at each other then the bush head said. “Oh… my third daughter of course!” Everyone but Stolas looked confused.

Moxxie the questioner asks. “But she looks the same age as your human form.”

“Well yeah since she is 14 and I’m also currently 14.” Moxxie, Loona and Octavia being the ones with common sense just got more confused. “Lemme explain, so something bad happened which I saved her from, awesomely I might add then I went to the police and got a cult leader arrested.”

Loona and Octavia just looked at the girl and each other, Ibara wanting to be nice introduces herself. “Hello I am Fidem Ibara.” Stolas got whiplash from turning his head at her.

“Did you say Fidem?” Stolas asked to which he got a nod, he turned to Blitzo “B-Blitzy, you took my last name.” He said with stars in his eyes.

The others didn’t know about Fidem, Octavia had to ask. “Wait isn’t our last name Goetia.”

“Yes but at the same time no, it’s our royal name or the one we use for appearances.” Stolas explained.

Millie asks a good question. “Why does Blitz know your real name and not Octo.” Look I have to try and follow an accent that consists of nicknames.

“Reason why Octavia doesn’t know is because it’s her real name, look it’s hard to explain but the child of an royal couple carries the last name as their own. The reason that Blitzy knows is because he accidentally read my diary.” Everyone is starting to sit down on Izuku’s couch.

This went on with more questions being asked and then being answered. If you want to ask questions as one of the characters just say which one then to who and then the question and I’ll write as person questioned. That’s right, I’m making so you guys help with the story.

After this was all said and done, Blitzo says. “Okay it’s been a long ass day, we need some rest and I’ll let you guys crash here tonight.” He got yes as a reply from all.

He showed a couple of rooms, Millie and Moxxie took the lounge room. Loona and Octavia asked Ibara if they could crash with her and have a sleepover, remember the alone rich kid, adopted street kid and the used to be in a cult kid never had a sleepover. Stolas slept with Blitzo, if they heard noises that resembled kissing and sex no one mentioned it… they stopped thinking about it when they heard eldritch chewing noises.

A new dawn arrises, everyone wakes up differently. Moxxie and Millie wakes up first because the latter gained the habit from working on a farm, the former gets woken up by her kissing his forehead. Loona who goes to the kitchen to try and find something to drink. Octavia and Ibara conversing about the music they like, Ibara loves death metal apparently. Stolas who has a slight limp now and backwards clothing, from the look on everyone they heard last night which made Stolas apologise. Finally Blitzo who came out in school clothes.

Loona saw this. “The fuck did you two roleplay?” Stolas looked behind him to noticed a now clothed Blitzo.

“Don’t you know, I have school.” Moxxie looked surprised for his boss is actually learning stuff now. “If I want to punch that Baku-bitch face, I have to get there early so Ibara get dressed.” Ibara goes back into her room to dress into her new school clothes.

When she got out, they went to the door and said. “Be back soon.” Hah jokes on you Blitzo they don’t want you to leave yet so they’re following you to school.

Chapter Text

Blitzo and Ibara are currently walking towards Aldera with I.M.P team close behind, the two doesn’t know they have demonic stalkers. Blitzo nearly caught them a few times but they hid just in time, just like one of those cartoons heh, imagine Helluva Boss and Boku No Hero Academia being cartoons… wait a minute.

During the walk Blitzo complains he doesn’t have his car, Ibara says that exercise is good with Blitzo replying. “I’m gonna use magic to get muscles.” This caused Ibara to chuckle.

When they got to Aldera, Ibara and Izuku was nervous but Blitzo was ready. Ready for Baku-bitch of course, they went through the gates and Blitzo says. “Hey, we should spilt up for a bit so you don’t get harassed.” Ibara wonders why. “The reason being is because these guys hate the quirkless and those who hang with them.” Ibara no longer wonders why.

Ibara went to the office and Blitzo to Izuku’s class, he entered as Izuku hunched and muttering. He sat down in his chair and intercom turned on. “Could Ashine Steim head to the office.” Blitzo saw a bald kid get up and walk out the door, Baku-bitch just said extras gotta be extras or something like that. Blitzo swears he saw a binocular glint from a bush outside.

The teacher walks in and announces. “Calm down class, today we have a new student.”

Ibara walks in. “Hello I am Fidem Ibara.” Blitzo wonders about karma.

Baku-bitch asks. “What’s your quirk extra?” Blitzo’s gonna punch him in the face.

“My quirk is named Vine, my hair are regrowable vines that are under my control.” She pointed to her hair during that.

“Well you got quite a quirk there, maybe we should talk later.” Blitzo looked at Ibara with a look saying ‘don’t’, Ibara got the message and declined making Baku-bitch mutter dammit.

Ibara walked to bald kid’s old sit which is right next to Blitzo, she tried to say hello but remembered what he said. Blitzo was tempted to just say what was happened but it’ll be so much richer, he could handle the abuse… Izuku can. The day went on as normal, Ibara didn’t like normal because Blitzo is being heavily abused. Ibara is impressed that he isn’t a crispy to the bone… the I.M.P are fucking pissed but they couldn’t intervene.

Finally the end of the day arrived, guess who walked up to the owl fucker. “Hey Deku… still becoming a hero?”

Blitzo being the master of drama. “Y-y-yes K-Kachan.” Blitzo is laughing underneath the act and Ibara can see that.

Guess who didn’t. “Didn’t I tell you Deku, take the fucking swan dive because YOU AREN’T WORTH SHIT!”

Blitzo got very fucking mad, Izuku motioned for Ibara to leave, it was meant to be a secret but the two extras noticed and left after she did. “Hey Bakugou, we’re gonna go but have fun.”

Izuku and Katsuki are alone, Katsuki tried to hit him but Blitzo dodged then punched him in the dick. Bakugou crouched down, before he could retaliate, Blitzo started to kick him in the stomach. As Bakugou started to vomit, Blitzo pulled him up by his hair and slammed his face into a table around ten times. Baku-bitch tried to hit him in the face with an explosion but Izuku broke his wrist and Blitzo was impressed, they continued to break Bakugou’s bones. Since Blitzo had experience with these kinds of things, he was able to break the bones without them needing hospital attention… not needing immediate hospital attention. “No one will believe you.”

Blitzo ran out of the classroom, then out of the building, he searched for Ibara. He heard a high pitched sound, he naturally assumed that it was Ibara because whoever made that sound clearly didn’t have a lot of testosterone. When he got there he saw… he saw… he saw the most fucking hilarious thing, he ever saw.

Blitzo never bothered to learn their names so let’s call them, Misty Boy and Finger Bang. He saw a pantless Misty Boy being slammed into the walls by vines, clearly trying to activate his quirk but since it’s water, his mist kept getting absorbed. He saw Finger Bang tied up and his crotch being whipped by thorn covered vines. He could only guess that the reason why I.M.P didn’t intervene, is because they were laughing too much.

If we looked at I.M.P team, yep they’re laughing… Moxxie is wheezing… holy fuck Moxxie breathe! EVERYONE WE NEED SOME O2, HE AIN’T BREATHING! I wonder if anyone can tell who my favorite character is.

While Blitzo is dying, Izuku notices a crouched Ibara, he ran towards her but slowed down with each step. “Hey Ibarie, you okay.” He started to pet Ibara’s head, I can confirm that demonic headpats are 10/10 trauma reducers… if anyone went missing then it’s totally not me… stop looking at me like that.

“B-Blitz… no, I’m not.” Her vines are calming down. “They… they.”

Blitzo send a text to someone who’ll help. “No need to continue… I think you can stop though.”

She stopped her vines and retracted them. Misty Boy had broken legs and Finger Blast had passed out. Bakugou passed by, while bleeding and limping, he looked to see Izuku petting Ibara with two extras on the floor. “I remember a word for this… fucking Blitz.” He got the right answer but used the wrong formula. Katsuki grabs out a notebook, wrote on a page, ripped it out then threw it at Blitzo, finally he left.

Blitzo read the note and it read. “I’ll stop… I’ll fucking stop… I’m sorry for what I said but please don’t kill me.” Guess who got the good ol’ Blitzo PTSD.

Soon some cops cars and some ambulances arrived, Ibara thought the cop cars was for her but Blitzo said they weren’t. The workers in the ambulances quickly got to work with some healing, they didn’t need the hospital. When they were done the cops arrested them, the EMTs got to work with getting some injuries bandaged up.

A cop walked up to Blitzo. “Hey Blitz, quick question… did you do this.” It was Truman.

“No… but I may done something you’ll never prove.” How to become an evil mastermind, step 1, tell the cops you did crime.

“It scares me that you’re telling me the truth.” Truman ain’t lying.

“So what’s gonna happen with Misty Boy and Finger Bang?” The serious face on Blitzo made Truman snort, wouldn’t you laugh at someone saying Finger Bang completely serious?

“Those two already was under suspicion for crimes and now we can question them… legally.” Blitzo fist bumped.

“Wait, do we have to come in again.”

“No, besides I think Ibara might’ve convinced them not to lie.”

“Yeah… you should’ve seen what I saw.” He had a good laugh at the memory.

They said their goodbyes, Blitzo went to Ibara and offered a piggyback ride. Of course she accepted, the cat officer noticed and took a picture, by the end of the day the entire police force in Japan had seen the photo. Anyways Blitzo carried Ibara home, the I.M.P team took many photos, Stolas felt jealous.

When they got home, they’re met with the faces of the team… looking really puffed out for some reason. “Did you guys have a fucking orgy or something?”

Octavia was the one who spoke up. “NO! Dear Satan no… we decided to umm, to exercise of course.”

Moxxie backed her up. “Yep… exercise, gotta get those uhm, gluts.” He facepalmed. For those who don’t know, gluts are ass muscles.

Blitzo had no response to this… well except for. “Well you really need those.” He winked.

“Can you not flirt in front of me Blitzy.” Blitzo puts down Ibara.

“Don’t worry.” He gets close to Stolas’s ear. “This D is only meant for your C.”

“Oh, Blitzy~ hehehe.”

Loona, Ibara & Moxxie aka the Non-Horny Team said. “CAN YOU NOT BE EAR FUCK EACH OTHER!”

The two looked at each other and said. “No.” The NHT looked at them in disappointment.

After a moment of silence, they started to chuckle. Soon Ibara and Blitzo told them what happened during the end of the school day. When that was done, Blitzo mentioned the binocular glint in the bush… the demons fucking ran, after saying their goodbyes of course.

Blitzo remembered something. “Hey Ibarie.”

“Yes father.” Blitzo secretly thought ‘finally, a daughter that calls me dad.’

He pulls a camera from god knows where… it was his hair. “Let’s start a YouTube channel.”

Chapter Text

So you’re probably thinking, how would Blitzo’s channel be monetised. Well, YouTube is owned by someone who understands what someone wants. Most of the things that demonetises channels, they also got better Copyright Sensors, now false Copyrighters are gone.

So we’re back to the conversation. “Let’s start a YouTube channel.”

“You wanna do that today?” Ibara must admit, Blitzo is persistent.

“Yes, got any names?”

“No, hmm… how about-“ Blitzo covers her mouth.

He snapped his fingers. “I GOT IT! We’ll call it, the Fabulous Ultra Cool Kings.”

Ibara just looked disappointed… she wondered if he knew. “So, F.U.C.K is the name.”

“Yes.” He looked more prideful than he did when he made up, I.M.P.

She looked so disappointed, they went to their rooms to change into different clothes. Ibara came out looking like a Christian grandmother and Blitzo changed into the clothes he got yesterday. He has slicked back hair and is somehow rocking the fashion disaster. They began to discuss stuff, like who should be the cameraman, it is Ibara, they now were on location and topic.

“Okay Blitz, where should we do this and what’s the topic?” Ibara quickly got the camera thing down.

Blitzo pondered until Izuku decided to be evil at least once. “The police station! And the topic… will be how to punch a policeman and get away with it.”

“Are you trying to get arrested?” Ibara can’t handle the level that Blitzo is on.

Blitzo had many choices in answers but only one came to mind. “Maybe.” Alastor’s classic answer.

Ibara is so fucking done, she opens the door and gestures for him. Blitzo ran out the door, over the balcony and straight into the dumpster… Ibara laughed at him. When she got down and helped Blitzo out of the dumpster, they went to the police station. When they got to there, Truman noticed.

“Hey guys, what are you two doing here?” He had no idea.

Blitzo turned to Ibara. “Got the camera ready?”

“Yep.” She pulled a thumbs up.

Truman is confused. “What is-“ “Hello everyone and welcome to F.U.C.K.”

Truman is more confused but Blitzo went on. “Yes the title is real and here’s the cop, say hello Truman.”

“Hello? What’s going on here?”

Blitzo pulled a cheeky grin. “This of course!” He punched him straight in the face and ran away.

“Sorry Truman but I gotta go.” She bowed and ran to Blitzo, leaving Truman passed out on the floor.

Truman never remembered this encounter but his coworkers did, Izuku felt a bit sorry although he was the one who came up with it. As they ran they chatted about other ideas for videos… they were idiotic and very dangerous, they did them throughout the year. They in fact got some sponsors and a lot of fans, somehow Izuku got more simps than Blitzo… don’t ask how.

Chapter Text

It’s a few months after the start of the channel, it was doing really well. Turns out punching people in the face is a great way to start out. They did other stuff like how to make dumbass memes, horrible cooking and horse riding lessons… that one had so many sex jokes. The I.M.P Team were the first subscribers and they found most of it funny, they did not like ‘How 2 Have A 4some’ mostly because it started a cult.

Blitzo did get his clothes back but he kept the Izuku/Blitzo style since the original didn’t fit. Moxxie never did get those gloves. Blitzo still used his Voxxagram account and it got more followers… Demons really loved Izuku’s face. He’s not sure but he swears that Valentino sent him a dick pic and immediately removed it. Anyways, it’s Izuku’s birthday today. The I.M.P Team are really excited because no one knew Blitzo’s birthday, only Izuku’s.

Blitzo and Izuku clearly forgot since they weren’t expecting the family to jump out. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” Stolas was heard but not seen… hey that’s a weirdly large box.

“Shuddup.” Stolas whispers… what the 4th wall breaking fuck.

The duo in one said hello and they went to gift opening since nothing else was happening today.

Moxxie passes him a red letter and a green box. “Got something for you and something for Izuku.”

Izuku tells Blitzo something. “He says he hates it.” He gets punched in his own face by his own fist. “I mean he says he loves it.”

Blitzo opened his gift first, it was a picture of… Moxxie in a ‘wonderful position.’ “Moxxie you beautiful bastard.” Only Stolas learned what was in the letter, he loved it too.

Blitzo opens Izuku’s gift, it was a big notebook that could collapse by reciting a small spell, Blitzo can’t control the analysing of Izuku. “Izuku says this is awesome and that he could fu-“ he gets punched in the face by the same person. “Kiss you, he could kiss you.”

Millie went next, she passed over a long tube. “I think ya’ll would love this.”

Blitzo quickly opened it and Millie was telling the truth, it was a signed poster of the singers of Mustang Dong. I believe the names are Lile Wrath and Randon Brodgers. “Millie you beautiful bitch.” He hugged her. Fun fact Izuku became a fan because Blitzo wouldn’t stop playing the song.

Octavia is the third one, she gave a book. “This is just for Izuku but you might like it as well.”

He looked at Octavia suspiciously and slowly opened to a random page. When he fully opened it, it was a book based Pre-Quirk heroes. Izuku uses his rare times of speech to say. “I FUCKING KNEW IT!” He found Punisher’s page.

Ibara gives her gift, it was letter. He opens it to find something amazing. “FREE HORSE RIDING LESSONS! Ibarie you beautiful bastard.” He hugged her with a lot of force.

“Stop I’m gonna die.” She didn’t die but she did pass out.

Ignoring what happened, Loona went next, she handed out two gifts like Moxxie but they both were boxes. “The grey one is for you and the black one is for Izuku.”

Blitzo opened the black one first, it was figurine of Alastor. Izuku likes him because they had similar ideals, good thing they can never meet. The grey box was opened and it contained a little plastic thing. “Wait, is this?”

“Yep.” The others are confused.

“I’M A FATHERFUCKING GRANDDAD! Wait, aren’t you dating a girl?”

“Yeah me and Sallie are going great, we used a donor.” Everyone said their congratulations.

Moxxie did say this. “A new generation to torture me.”

“Damn straight.” The Hellhound said.

Blitzo immediately went. “Damn gay actually, anyways where is Stolas.” Everyone pointed towards the box including Izuku.

“Oh I wonder what could be in the box, surely not a tied up owl.” He said sarcastically.

He opened the box and surprisingly he was wrong. It’s was Stolas pantless and in a oversized sweater. Blitzo closes the box and takes it into his room. “You guys can leave, I won’t be leaving the house for a while.” Everyone knew what he meant, so they picked up Ibara and ran.

Hours later, Stolas was asleep and Blitzo was on the roof. He was having a cup of hot chocolate, he looked up at the moon. “Today was a good day, been a while since I had one of these. Want to know something Izuku?

He was met with silence from Izuku, that guy felt like listening right now. “I’ll take it as a yes.” He took a deep breath. “I’m going to tell you something that no one at I.M.P knows, today isn’t just your birthday.” He heard a gasp in his head. “I know, today is my birthday as well.” He got up and went back to his apartment then spent the rest of night cuddling with Stolas.

Chapter Text

Now it’s the day of the UA Entrance Exam. Blitzo been training a lot, he can lift a medium size rock now. I don’t imagine that would be useful later. Since Izuku doesn’t really do anything, he teaches Blitzo how to counter Quirks they see in life or on TV. Izuku helped Ibara train her Quirk and Blitzo taught her how to use a gun.

Blitzo read UA website and their rules for the entrance exam. He learned that he could bring anything, not a lot of people knew about that, good for him. Ibara would rather get in with her Quirk instead of a gun. Yes, Blitzo brought the weapons bag. Honestly it’s easier to just skip the ‘getting to the UA building’ and get to the interesting bits.

Katsuki after that day clearly never bullied Izuku/Blitzo and he didn’t insult them when he bumped into them. Blitzo still trips but accidentally takes Ibara down with him. They were caught by Uraraka but this time the main character held up a conversation so he got her name. But only for a bit since they had to go inside. The writing part is still the same so let’s skip it.

Present Mic did his thing, telling everyone about the pointers and crap. He was going to talk about the 0P when a blue haired boy stood up. “Sir, you didn’t mention about the fourth Pointer that’s on the pamphlet. I have to say that for the high ranking school that is UA, this is a major disgrace!”

He turns to Izuku. “And you, you’ve done nothing but say dirty jokes and idiotic nonsense about Demons.” Izuku flips him off. “HOW DARE YOU!” People are laughing.

Present Mic deciding this is a good time to butt in. “Hey lil listener, I was about to talk about the final Pointer.” Iida says sorry and Present Mic says the same thing as he did in canon.

Ibara, Katsuki and Blitzo were split up since they went to the same school. Blitzo got changed in the changing room (what else is it used for? You might ask, well shut the fuck up), he changed into a smaller version of his old outfit. Then he got onto a bus and messaged I.M.P what happened, they all had a good laugh.

When he got to City E aka where he’s taking his entrance exam. He noticed that Uraraka was nervous so he helped boost her confidence. “Hey there kid, need some help?”

“Nah I’m fine… wait aren’t you my age?”

Blitzo decided to ignore that and said. “Well between you and me, a good way to feel confident is to say fuck you to the world.” He struck up his hands in Y shape.

Uraraka thought about and said. “Yeah, fuck poverty!” The other exam takers were confused.

Iida wasn’t, he just went. “This is a place for learning, training and heroics. You shouldn’t swear in it.” Then he turns to Blitzo. “And you, I bet you’re trying to distract her so you could win easily.”

Blitzo was about to cuss out this man, but that didn’t work since Present Mic screamed go. Blitzo immediately ran since he knew that go means go. Everyone else was staying confused. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING! GO MEANS GO! LOOK AT THAT KID ALREADY RUNNING!” Referring to Blitzo.

Blitzo scanned around for enemies and each time he did, he would bring out a weapon that shouldn’t fit inside that fucking bag. And blast all those fucking robots to Hell! He dodged a lot of bullets and punches but that doesn’t mean he didn’t get scratched.

In the teachers viewing spot, we see the teachers judging and reviewing. “We have some interesting could-be heroes this year.” Said by the rodent god Nezu.

“We do, and their passion is very welcoming.” Said by the dominating heroine Midnight.

“Ignoring that, some of them are very well trained.” Said by the one, the only, the legendary Eraser-Head. “Some are trackers.” Shows Shouji searching for robots.

The loud guy himself says. “Others are speed based.” Showing Iida and Ashido running slash surfing.

A buffed vampire named Vlad mentions. “We can’t forget about pure strength.” Showing Bakugo and Kirishima.

The Japanese cowboy Snipe says. “Well that’s all and good, but I gotta say this one is my favourite.” Pointing out Blitzo, All Might doesn’t recognise him.

The school engineer Power Loader notices something. “Hold on… what’s his Quirk?”

Nezu searches it up, he was shown. “Oh my, oh my, oh my. He doesn’t have a Quirk.”

This was met with various amounts of what the! And holy shit! Mostly from Power Loader since. “Then how does… how? Just how?” He seemed to be crying.

All Might is silent since he isn’t allowed to voice an opinion, that’s because he isn’t hired yet. But he would’ve said something along the lines of. ‘This kid shouldn’t be here since he’s Quirkless.’ Wait that’s what he’s thinking.

Power Loader finally says what he noticed. “HOW DOES FUCKING BAG WORK!?” Finally everyone noticed the bag. They freaked out more.

“He’s carrying it on his front, but due to the easier access to the weapons I say he’s smart.” Aizawa said, not realising what’s going to happen. No a different thing.

We’re back to Blitzo, he’s racking up points and oil. Izuku is counting down to something, Blitzo had no idea what. But it was getting to him. Of course he helped out other people, due to Izuku saying so. Man, Blitzo does not wear the pants in this relationship.

Izuku then reached 180, then the ground rumbled. Soon buildings turned to dust, a smoke screen hid the monster behind all this. Blitzo turned and looked, he asked what this was.

Izuku simply replied. “The 0 Pointer, or if you payed attention. The OP.”

The dust started to clear up, revealing a giant robot. It looked like robotic god. Blitzo went to run away to gain more points until he heard a voice. One that shouted out in pain. They turned and looked to see Uraraka stuck under a medium sized rock. And the gigantic robot was rolling to her, soon to be over her. This seemed like a coincidence made by a fanfic writer. Blitzo looked up to the author and said. “You Bitch.” How the fuck?

Blitzo didn’t need Izuku to tell him to save her, he ain’t letting a child die right in front of him. Unless the child is a dick, but Uraraka wasn’t. The green demon ran fast and reached her with the robot close. It seemed that Blitzo won’t be able to lift the rock in time. So he reached into the bag and grabbed the perfect weapon, a light and dark green striped bazooka with spikes around the blast zone. It had the logo named MY DICK on it.

The teachers had different reactions to it.

Nezu just choked on his tea.

Midnight said. “I love this child, I’m going to adopt this child.” Nezu did pass over adoption papers, don’t question Nezu and how he has legal documents. Did he just wink at me?

Present Mic fell out of his seat laughing HARD.

Vlad King just looked at the screen. “You keep him Aizawa. This is a demon child.” Vlad was right in two ways.

Snipe asked Nezu if he could send the video to his gun builders, Snipe wanted to steal the look. Nezu said yes, but under the condition that he sends him one as well. Everyone should have a bazooka that’s named my dick, even women and rodents.

Aizawa looks between Katsuki and Blitzo, then says. “I can only handle so much, so Vlad, you’re taking the explosion kid.” Vlad agrees, only if he knew.

Power Loader is deciding if he should just quit but then he thinks. ‘Fuck it, magic is real.’

All Might is thinking of a plan to get rid of Blitzo/Izuku.

And secretly in the shadows, Stolas and Millie are trying not to laugh. Moxxie is crying tears of joy, Loona, who has said on multiple occasions that she would drink Moxxie’s tears, drinks them. Octavia… she had the common sense of doing her job at I.M.P which is murdering or finding then murdering someone, she’s looking for a plague doctor. Wait what?

Anyways, Izuku destroyed the robot with the MY DICK launcher. The robot corpse or what’s left, fell over backwards and the other pieces. Blitzo did some secret magic bullshit and sent it all to hell.

____________________________

In hell, Lucifer was having a bad day. Lilith was on vacation in Heaven, she got a pass from Eve for stabbing Adam in the dick. His most of his friends had some business to attend too and the ones that didn’t, just spent time with their families. Now with Charlie, it’s actually good for once on that front. For some reason during last year, she got out of a funk because of regaining. “My human consultant.” He had a clue on who it was.

Anyways his day was about to become worse, since a portal opened up above him causing all sorts of mechanical limbs to fall on him. It was very fucking painful, Lucifer only had one hint for who caused this. A badly written note saying. “I have adopted your daughter.” With adoption papers falling right on Lucifer’s head.

“I fucking swear Blitz has army of daughters at this point.” He shook his head. “And why did he send me this? Everyone knows he just adopts every girl he meets.”

_____________________________

Anyways everything went on as canon, except Blitzo didn’t end up in a hospital bed. He got the letter and showed it to the I.M.P team plus the newest intern, Ibara. She helps Stolas, Moxxie and Octavia with the taxes and deals. The reactions to the letter were great, but they had the feeling that All Might was a bit passive aggressive.

Blitzo then realised at this very moment what he forgot. “Hey everyone.” He does little head bumps and lifts his hand making a finger point. “How many people know that I’m alive?”

The sudden realisation that they forgot to tell Hell that Blitzo is back, hits them HARD. Well they remembered to tell his multiple daughters. If you’re wondering how many he has, here’s a list.

Loona, Octavia, Ibara, Charlie, Niffty, Cherri Bomb, Crymini, Helsa Von Eldritch, Mimzy, Rose, Velvet, Mrs Mayberry, Coco, Milky, Kiki, Deerie, Eve (Blitzo should’ve realised that he would’ve been granted redemption at this point), Beelzebub, Pandemonica, Azazel, Mazikeen, Raphtalia and so on and so on. (Just assume that 80% of females in fiction was adopted by Blitzo, except in BNHA, that hasn’t happened yet).