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"I'm sorry, Alex."
Miles took a deep drag of his cigarette and stubbed it out in the ashtray on the coffee table. He dragged a hand through Alex's hair, scratching his scalp with his nails.
"I can't keep doing this to the lads. You can't keep doing this to me. Me heart can't take much more of this. I'm gonna keel over dead at 35 of a coronary, and it'll be all your fault. I'd pity the poor bugger who 'ave to tell me mum that piece of news."
"I'm sorry," Alex mumbled groggily. "I really am. I dunno why I 'ave to be so melodramatic all the time. I dunno why you keep putting up with me, Mi." He whimpered and closed his eyes, turning his head so that his nose brushed against Miles's jumper. "You didn't 'ave to hit me so damn hard, though. You could've pulled your punch. Jeez…"
Alex moaned and ran the pads of his fingers over the throbbing red goose egg on his forehead. "It huuurrrts," he wailed mournfully. "Why'd ya do it, Mi?"
Miles frowned and kissed Alex's bruised forehead. "I don't 'ave to tell you why. You know good and well...but, for the sake of transparency, I'll lay it all out for you. I love you, Alex Turner. I can't let you go, not knowin' what you're gunna do next or where you might end up. I can't let you leave, Alex. Not without me."
"Hmm. Well then, Mr Kane, it seems that we have reached a conundrum. Whatever are we going to do about it?"
Miles laughed and grabbed a handful of Alex's hair. "You cheeky smartarse. I s'pose the only thing to be done is to go on livin' together. Maybe not in this flat, maybe not in Lambeth. Maybe not even in the whole of London. Wherever we make our new love nest, it'll have to be within 50 miles of the city. I'll 'ave to sublet this place, check out places for rent or sale online, get all me stuff packed and ready to move -"
"Whoa, slow down, Mi. You're makin' me 'ead hurt worse." Alex groaned and Miles lessened his hold on his hair. He smoothed the dark brown tendrils across the back of Alex's head.
"Right. I guess we have plenty of time, don't we? I can make a few calls, talk to me agent and bandmates. Well, you still an't told me 'ow you feel about it. Your opinion and input is very much appreciated, Alex."
Alex snorted and once again assumed a stereotypical posh RP accent. "Is that so, Miles? I do believe that I would quite enjoy that, yes. I would very much like to share a home with you, on a more permanent basis."
He winced and pressed the back of his hand to his forehead. "Ugh, I think I need an icepack and some paracetamol, and then I'm gunna lay down for a bit. I really am sorry, Miles. Come with me. I love you."