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Gu Zi knows that Lang-gege doesn't like his dad. It's obvious how his eyes glow in hate when he looks at the lantern where his dad's flame rest. Gu Zi doesn't know why and Lang-gege would never tell him, always with an expression of pity, as if he thinks that Gu Zi will be sad if the truth was said. He's not sure if Lang-gege should tell him or not, but Gu Zi has started to fear that Lang-gege won't help him with bringing his dad back.
Gu Zi doesn't think that Lang-gege is a lier or a bad person, but he couldn't help the fear. His dad is not... Nice with most people, maybe too vulgar and abrasive, his dad has made his way to piss off every person he could find. Even Scrap-gege seemed to hate his dad and Gu Zi has found himself afraid. He fears that everyone, even Lang-gege, will do everything on their power to avoid his dad to come back.
The fear is mentally taxing, making Gu Zi feel anxious and tired everyday. Sometimes he doesn't feel comfortable letting go the lantern, with the irrational fear that it will disappear or that someone will eradicate his dad by taking advantage of his vulnerability. Even sleeping with the lantern beyond a few inches from him was a great problem for him. Lang-gege has said that Gu Zi was becoming too attached to the lantern and needed to relax because his wouldn't like to see him loosing his sleep needlessly. Gu Zi didn't say anything about it, but he doesn't think that his dad is a bad reason to lose sleep.
Then, anyone could understand Gu Zi panic when one night at midnight he woke up and found that the lantern was gone and nowhere to be seen. There wasn't the green light that dispersed his fears and gave him warmth. Gu Zi just felt the tears falling and the lump in his throat before he was in front of Lang-gege's doors.
(Gu Zi breathed heavily, his small hands reaching for the necklace his father gave him. A gift that not even Lang-gege knew about. Dad said that it was so important to keep secret that he could vanish if someone ever knew about it.
"This ancestor is giving this to you, my cheap son, because just you deserve this, ok? Nobody can know." His dad said that night.)
Gu Zi was about to scream for Lang-gege's help, but his voice stopped him.
"You bastard," Lang QianQiu whispered and Gu Zi had to put his ear against the door to hear him. "You don't deserve him and he still take care of your stupid flame... He's so worried."
Is Lang-gege going insane? There was anyone with him? Is his dad with him? Gu Zi decided that, even knowing it was bad to sneak into Lang-gege's room, he would open the door slowly and quietly to see what was going on. Lang-gege never closed his room with key anyways, to be always available for Gu Zi.
With more care than Gu Zi ever thought he could perform, he opened just slightly the door, enough to see into the dark room. There was Lang QianQiu, sitting in the middle of it with a lantern that released a phantasmagoric green glow between his hands. He had the lantern in a hard grip and his eyes were sending thunders full of hate to the object in question. He was too focused on the lantern, completely absorbed by its light, without attention to spare to anything else.
Gu Zi gasped in distress. That's his dad's lantern and Lang-gege didn't seem friendly that night. The fear came back, eating Gu Zi alive, paralyzing him in his place. What to do? Lang-gege said he would help him, but it's more and more obvious he will do the opposite right now.
"So worried for you..." Lang QianQiu spitted with anger filling his words. "Keeping you around, having problems to sleep. Just for you, the biggest asshole in the Three Realms."
Lang QianQiu wrinkled his nose, an expression of disgust ruining his usually kind features. Gu Zi just hoped that the firm grip on the lantern lessened a bit.
"You should disappear, finally vanish so Gu Zi could move on, leave his shitty dad behind." Gu Zi shivered at the cruel smile that Lang QianQiu gave to the lantern, as if ready to destroy the object without remorse.
Gu Zi felt his heart race, tears falling and his body unable to move. He would lose his dad, won't he? Small and weak as he was, Gu Zi could just watch. The sorrow started to appear, the feeling of loss came back, but there was a new feeling too.
(Hate, it's hate what he feels, but he doesn't know.)
But suddenly, when the bitter feelings started to eat Gu Zi's mind, they vanished from Lang QianQiu's face. Surprised, and kinda relieved, Gu Zi observed how Lang-gege's face fell, passing from that burning hate to an infinite tiredness. Even his grip softened, now barely touching the lantern.
Lang-gege looked as if he had just realized something really important, with the same face that he did when Gu Zi cried for his dad after he became a little flame without form or voice. Lang-gege seemed to be older now, even with his young face.
"He cares about you, bastard." He says in an strangled sound. "Just... Come back soon, Gu Zi needs you here."
Lang QianQiu sigh and mumble something that Gu Zi can't hear, but the grief in Lang QianQiu's eyes is evident. Like that, in the middle of the dark room with only the green light of the lantern, Lang-gege seemed to be mourning something or someone. Gu Zi couldn't help think that maybe this was his way to deal with his dad's absence, maybe he missed him somehow. Maybe he needed Gu Zi's comfort.
"Lang-gege," he said softly.
Lang QianQiu, startled, looked at the kid that he didn't notice before. Gu Zi gave him a sweet smile, but Lang QianQiu's face became deathly pale.
This... This wasn't supposed to be seen by anyone. He was just...
A little voice came out of the lantern, "Gu Zi?"
Fuck.