Work Text:
The fancy high end apartment Boss bought feels like a fantasy, with the doors being the portal to a different world. No guns, no cursing, just old white people finding ways to make themselves busy with nothing. Suits and expensive clothes that make Alex feel bare with their years old jacket and ripped jeans. Despite coming in nearly everyday, the woman at the front desk keeps glaring at them, and they aren't sure if it's because she can tell they're trouble, poor, or Hispanic. Probably all three.
Racism aside, Eiji always welcomes them in with open arms, a fake plastic smile on his face and eye bags he thinks he hid well with makeup. Alex doesn't really judge. They'd offer to help make it less obvious but then they'd have to admit to doing the same. Boss doesn't notice at all; he never seems to look closer at Eiji, he trusts him and all that. Alex trusts their boyfriends like that too, but they still check everyday for cuts and such.
Not that they'll ever say it to his face. That's a death sentence they want to avoid.
Everyday Alex steps into that fancy apartment and watches them put on this act they clearly know is bullshit. Normalcy; that Boss works at some equally fancy business and Eiji is the doting boyfriend that sits around doing nothing. If they're going to play along with the weird normalcy act Boss likes to do in the apartment, then if Boss is Eiji's boyfriend and puts him on this pedestal of greatness, Alex is the protective older brother that picks up the broken pieces when he's not around.
Because once that door closes and Boss is out for the day, Eiji stops smiling. He sighs, shoulders slump like he's got the weight of the world on them, and asks Alex if they're alright with doing nothing and he goes back to bed. It's not like that every day; sometimes he feels good enough to bake or talk about something other than New York, but more often than not he's out like a light. Lack of sleep will do that to someone.
Alex has their fair share of nightmares, most about their ex and others about a bullet through their skull, but Eiji's nightmares seem to be a different breed altogether. Personal, intense, guilt ridden. He won't say anything about them, because of course he won't, but Alex has woken him up enough times to know it's bad. He doesn't wake up like Boss does, ready to kill God and get shit done. Nah, he wakes up composed, tears still on his face, and resigned. Like he gave up in his dreams.
Sometimes Eiji will hint at what's going on in his head, but he'll just as quickly pull back, like the knowledge will kill. It builds up periodically like a dam, breaking at the slightest nudge and once the waterworks are gone it's rebuilt as quickly as it broke. It scares them more than Boss sometimes, because if Eiji can hide it from him so easily, then what else is behind those doe eyes?
Yeah, Eiji is fucking terrifying. How can someone make Boss enamored with them so easily? There's rumors about how and when it all started, but nothing concrete enough to confirm it. It's not like anyone can just waltz up to one of them and ask.
But despite all that, Eiji's a fun guy. A little self conscious about his English, but Alex has been helping out as a fellow bilingual. He's talkative when he wants to be, going on about stories and myths from Japan and was surprisingly happy to talk about horror movies with the gang once. He lights up a room when he isn't alone, cracking jokes and doting over everyone like a worried parent and allows himself to be treated gently by the others.
He never lets anyone see the downs except for Alex. It's an honor and a curse at the same time. Trust is the biggest factor of it, he wouldn't have told them if he thought they'd snitch. Sometimes Alex wishes they have the courage to snitch.
During another nameless day in the apartment, Eiji fell asleep on the couch. It happens sometimes, he loses the strength to get up and walk to the bedroom. Alex doesn't do much during those days. They keep tabs on what everyone else is doing and occasionally make something to eat. Despite his tiredness, Eiji always finds time to keep the place well stocked. They're finishing out a pack of cookies when they hear a thud .
They bring their gun even though they're aware no one suspicious can even walk through the front door. They find Eiji on the floor, and they sigh in relief seeing the coffee table far enough from the couch that he only hit his head on the floor and not on glass. He's still asleep too, twisting and turning the upper half of his body while kicking his legs. For some reason, his hands are above his head while he's struggling.
Now this is usually when Alex wakes him up and they don't talk about what happened, and they're about to do that when Eiji suddenly reaches out and screams as if he was stabbed, startling Alex and making them move back. Eiji continues writhing on the floor, tears on his face as he mumbles in Japanese and curls in on himself. They've never seen him react like this in his sleep.
They're contemplating waking him up, mostly worried it'll be like that one time Bones woke up Boss, when Eiji stops crying. His head is pressed against the couch leg as his breathing starts to even out. Problem solved? Alex stares at him for a little longer, trying to see if he'll suddenly start writhing around again. When it looks like he won't, they pick him up and decide to put him in bed. The location doesn't stop nightmares, but a bed is softer.
They don't hear from Eiji for another hour until the door opens and they see him walk into the kitchen and come back with a glass of water. The fact he was crying is so obvious and clear to see, but he smiles anyway. "Thanks for moving me."
Alex does their best to smile back. "Yeah, no problem."
Eiji manages to make small talk with them before excusing himself to go to the bathroom. Alex hears the water stay on longer than normal for a quick trip to the bathroom, and then Eiji is back, smiling and joking like he didn't have a nightmare. The only hint Alex ever gets about what it was about was when Eiji mumbled louder than necessary how he suddenly lost interest in shibari. A quick Google search told them everything they needed to know.
And yet they continue their unique song and dance, avoiding the blatant problem in their faces in favor of a more comfortable and blissful ignorance. Though, it can't really be ignorance if both parties are aware of what's going on. Then again, this dance isn't for their benefit.
It's for Boss, for when he finally comes back after days and Eiji smiles brighter than ever and hugs him and acts like everything was all cupcakes and rainbows while he was gone. It's for his sake, so he can come back and not feel completely shitty for leaving Eiji in the dark and for him to have some kind of normalcy.
Normalcy. What a weird fucking word. It can be coming home to a loving boyfriend every night or constantly watching your friend break down in front of you. Still, Alex will put up with the glares from the receptionist and the terrifying lack of stars in Eiji's eyes sometimes if it means no one walks into the place and finds a corpse.