Work Text:
The night was dark, as it had been so often on the seas, not even a star in the sky. Despite his crewmates on board with him, the ronin couldn’t be more lonely.
The loneliness had never been quelled, not even for but a moment. For he knew only one thing would repair the ache upon his soul.
A sigh escaped his gently parted lips as he looked to that empty expanse above him.
Empty as he himself was, were he to divulge into such cliché words.
As he stared into the darkness absent of its warm, welcoming celestial bodies- ...he again could not stop himself from the comparison. But the sky quickly reminded him of something else.
The inky midnight, near purple in its colour, that he had spent so long with.
The whispering winds that ghosted across his flesh as words once did.
He indulged himself in it, allowed himself to delve into memories that held nothing but pain and love.
“You’re late.” The frown upon his Aster Blossom’s face brought a soft chuckle from his lips.
“I do apologise for my absence. Yours was felt just as heavily.”
The frown wavered as the familiar face he had memorised the features of went red. “You should’ve been here sooner.”
He laughed, stepping away from the doors. “I tried. But one cannot control one’s own destiny.”
“Destiny is overrated.” He frowned himself at the words. He knew they were caused by the inescapable fate of his Aster Blossom.
He sighed, reaching his hand to rest upon warm flesh, feeling the lean into his touch. “But alas we cannot change it. If I were able, I would direct the winds of Fate to right yours, Aster Blossom. Perhaps one day they will.”
“They won’t. And if you do anything to change anything, like the fool you are, nothing good will happen.”
“Yet I would not regret it. Were my actions to change anything for you, I would do it all in a heartbeat.” He gently laid upon the pillows and bedding which were far above his station, too plush and wonderful for anyone but his love to rest upon.
In less than a moment, his arms were filled with a cool pressure, breath ghosting upon the skin of his throat and a tight embrace enveloping him.
“You will do no such thing. I will endure so long as I have you with me. I cannot lose you. So don’t dare to meddle in Her wants.”
“As you wish,” he promised. “You are everything to me, darling. Though it pains me to see you so, I will let you do as you wish so long as we are together. I could not bear to lose you either.”
“You'd be fine without me. You were before.” The next words, he was forced to strain to hear. “It is I who needs you. You are all I have.”
“You continue to assume that you mean so little.” He pressed a soft kiss to the dark hair, lowering his head to whisper words intended for no ears but their own. “Though so many tell you of your perfection, I truly mean it. In a way far different from those She entertains, you are perfect to me. You are the blood that flows through my veins, the song that is forever in my mind, the stars that illuminate my sky, the solace of my soul, the reparation of my being, the entirety of all I know. You claim I could live without you, that I would be fine, but every moment I spend without you, my heart aches.”
“You say such silly things.” The words were hushed, filled with embarrassment. He could feel the features of the face he had so memorised began to heat. “…you are the only one I ever truly believe. No one else can compliment me as you do. You are the only one to truly love me.”
“I am the only one who knows you,” he murmured. “You spend so much time forcing numbness and complacency and perfection. They see you as Her doll, the sweet bird in a cage of Her design. They do not know you the way I do. If they did, you would be all the more beloved.”
“I am nothing but Her object to display. Some treasure, a Fabergé egg resting on a pillow for all to see. To admire, to compliment. Never to touch, never to understand. I am but a pretty face for them to enjoy, for them to wish they could own. They would never have interest nor care in what lies below the surface. You are the first. The only.”
“You make me feel so loved~” He laughed, tightening his hold on his love who was a simple doll. “I suppose it’s better that they don’t know you. I rather enjoy having the beauty of the world all to myself. And your ‘pretty face’ is a rather nice addition to that.”
The sound, somewhere between a scoff and a laugh, brought a wide smile to his face. “You’re an idiot. You… I cherish these moments, you know. This is when I can relax. When I can drop everything, my facade, my walls, my fears. You replace them all, fill the void they occupy with adoration and love and warmth. You are the only one who could ever do such a thing. And… I thank you for that, Maple Leaf.”
“There’s nothing to thank me for. I wish nothing but your happiness, Aster Blossom. The memories of my time with you, stolen and forbidden though they are, stay with me at all moments. If I didn’t have these memories, I could not bear the time I spend away from you.”
The laugh- he decided it was a laugh- came again. “Then you must understand the torture I endure every day. My thoughts must be blank and thus, I ache for you at all times. You won’t know how often I wish I could have you with me at every moment. To simply stay with me, next to me, all of it. I despise that I must let you go.”
He sighed, quiet for a moment too long. “…but we must let go. Though you are the air I breathe and all I love, we were never meant to have this. I will never regret that we are nor do but, alas, it is necessary to keep it in here, locked behind the walls of your palatial room. I won’t have anything happening to you because of me, love.”
“She would never hurt me,” came the quiet reply. “I know that much. Punish me, She may, but hurt me, She wouldn’t dare. No, I worry over you. Were you to be found here… I fear that her fury would descend upon you. I cannot lose you that way.”
“I worry for you anyway. I don’t trust Her not to harm you. I won’t have you put in jeopardy either.” His hand worked small circles into skin covered in soft satin, a contrast to the indigo night hair, soft as silk and scented with lavender.
He’d never felt as calmed or loved as he did, hugging his Aster Blossom, in a world that existed for them and between them alone, in eventual silent perfection, in an envelope of warmth and adoration, together in a way they knew they should have never dared to be and yet would never let go.
He sighed at memories, resting his head in his hand. He supposed he had been foolish, in his younger years, to believe they would never be found, to believe they would stay together forever.
He wondered if, somewhere, his Aster Blossom kept the memories close as he did. If the memories ever invaded, ever crept into thoughts, stayed near the heart he had once and continued so love. He wondered if his face was as recurrent in his once-love’s dreams. He couldn’t help the quiet hope that he was still as important as his beloved Aster Blossom was to him.
As he stared at the starless expanse above, his hope that they would be reunited again flickered, for just a moment.