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The Lethal Walnut

Summary:

Preview of Chapter 2:

"Hanguang Jun... Is pregnant"

 

"W... What?" Lan Xichen asks shock.

 

"A... Are you sure?" Wei Wuxian asks a smile appearing on his once worried face and he looks at Lan Wangji who is still looking at Wen Qing blinking.

 

"Hanguang Jun is pregant!" the junior trio exclaims delighted before they were scolded by Jiang Cheng.

--

Or where WangXian had twins, Lan Zhan uses walnuts as his weapon, and the rest of them especially Wei Ying just tries to avoid getting hit by walnuts.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Chapter Text

His twins are his pride and joy, Lan Wangji poured his heart, soul, and body just to bring to them world, to see his husband's smile as Lan Wangji tiredly cradles their twins after giving birth to them for almost the whole day and for Wei Ying to shower him with so much kisses and love thankful for his work carrying their children.

 

He had never seen Wei Ying be so protective, always angry and fussy when he even attempts to lift his hand to do simple work like laundering and folding their clothes or making his husband tea , preferring he rest while he does all the work no matter how clumsy he is.

 

But he swears to the heavens when all he has to do again is to lie in bed when the twins almost just loves to sleep the whole day...

 

During his last trimester and after the birth of their twins something just clicked to Wei Ying and his older brother, Lan Xichen.

 

They've gone bat shit crazy.

 

They never allow him to leave the bed, insisting he rests because sure it was really shocking and exhausting for Lan Wangji that in the second year of their marriage they received news that he was carrying twins, it was still hilarious for him when Wei Ying passed out while Lan Xichen choked on his tea when they found out.

 

"Hanguang Jun, I brought tea and snacks" he looks up hearing his title mentioned, "Sizhui" he says a small grin on his face while Lan Sizhui places a tray with tea and sweets in them.

 

Lan Jingyi and Jin Ling soon joined them, they were literally the only people other than Wei Ying, Lan Xichen, and Jiang Cheng that he could talk to because they're very specific as to who can only visit him.

 

"Zewu Jun is going on a night hunt tonight, Hanguang Jun" Lan Jingyi says while chewing on his own mooncake and Jin Ling scolds him for being so messy.

 

"I see"

 

"Hanguang Jun, when will you be allowed to go out?" Jin Ling asks and it was Lan Jingyi's turn to scold him.

 

Wei Ying comes in, "Lan Zhan, I got some peaches" he says kissing his forehead before approaching the sleeping twins and Lan Wangji takes the basket from him checking the peaches his husband bought.

 

"It looks good"

 

"Mhm, I made sure to get the very best for Lan Zhan"

 

-

 

"No, Lan Zhan you're staying here. Your body is still tired"

 

Lan Wangji huffs throwing a walnut at his stubborn husband, Wei Ying sighs ignoring the walnut thrown at him since his wife's body is still pretty weak barely able to throw, the walnut simply falling on the floor.

 

"Wangji, stop being stubborn"

 

He throws a walnut at Lan Xichen too. This time he was able to throw to his brother but it only hit his chest.

 

"Let him come if he wants to" Jiang Cheng shrugs rolling his eyes when Lan Xichen and Wei Wuxian glared in his direction, "you only say that because you want to stop him from throwing anymore walnuts" Wei Wuxian says.

 

"He's literally beside me, he can throw more than a fucking walnut"

 

"I want to join xiongzhang" Lan Wangji stubbornly says and sighs when one of the twins starts crying, his little girl, Wei Xiang followed by Wei Feng, his little boy, both wanting to be fed by their mother. He stands up and Wei Wuxian pulls the cloth divider to give Lan Wangji and their children privacy.

 

"Maybe next time when the children are a little older"

 

"Let me go out"

 

"Alright Wangji, but only inside Gusu"

 

"Mhm"

 

"Xichen-ge, he should just stay in bed"

 

"Do you want him to keep throwing walnuts at us?"

 

-

 

"Ah, Lan Zhan! Careful! Careful!" Wei Ying says tempted to pull his wife, stop him from going downstairs exhausting himself and Lan Wangji glares as he makes his first step down the stairs.

 

"Wei Ying" he warns showing the walnut in his other hand that wasn't holding the railing and Wei Ying sighs obviously hoping for his wife to stop threatening and hitting him with his current most lethal weapon.

 

Lan Wangji doesn't admit his legs feel a little strained by the time he gets to the bottom of the stairs, but just like Wei Ying, his gege knows him well a small bench had been placed at the bottom of the stairs. Wei Ying doesn't comment helping him sit comfortably.

 

"Get our babies, Wei Ying"

 

"Why, Lan Zhan? They're just napping"

 

"They're awake"

 

And as always, Lan Wangji's maternal intuitions are correct. Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian sets the wooden twin bassinets, Wei Wuxian smiles fondly watching Wei Xiang and Wei Feng look at their surrounding interested.

 

Lan Wangji seems happy to finally be able to see more than just the ceiling or their room, "Wei Ying, I want to go out and join the rest of the disciples to eat" he says.

 

"Ah, Lan Zhan let's ju- Aya Lan Zhan! Give me those stupid walnuts!"

 

Lan Wangji does not hesitate to throw another although it hits Jiang Cheng instead.

 

-

 

"What happened to you?" Lan Xichen asks to Wei Wuxian who has a red mark on his forehead having just finished teaching, "after eating breakfast, Lan Zhan had the strength to throw a walnut after I told him I'll assist him back to our quarters" he sighs.

 

"Where is he right now?"

 

"Wen Qing is checking up on him and the babies, they're in a hut"

 

"I'll go check on them"

 

"Thanks ge, my next class is about to start anyway"

 

Lan Xichen walks to the hut where Lan Wangji and the babies are, he's carrying Wei Feng while Wen Qing checks up on him the two of them having a serious discussion by the expression on their faces. "Is everything alright?" he asks checking in on Wei Xiang whose starting to fall asleep.

 

"Yes, the babies are fine" Wen Qing says, "however, it's Hanguang Jun who is... Not so fine" she continues looking at Lan Wangji with a hint of concern.

 

Lan Xichen frowns sitting beside Lan Wangji inmediately, "what do you mean?" he asks worried for his didi and she sighs for Lan Wangji's sake having an insane and overprotective husband and older brother must be a continuous headache.

 

"It's not that bad, Zewu Jun. Hanguang Jun just needs to eat more especially meat, his weight continues to decrease while his body provides more milk for the babies" she says.

 

Lan Xichen nods sighing in relief, already thinking of better meal plans for his didi. "Anyway, I'll get back here in three weeks, I just need to pick up more medicinal supplies" she says before bowing leaving the Twin Jades of Lan in the hut.

 

-

 

Lan Wangji is evidently tired after walking wherever he could the entire day, so when Wei Wuxian finished his classes and got back to their quarters he is gifted with the sight of Lan Wangji cradling their children close to him sleeping in their bed. He didn't want to disturb since Lan Wangji and their twins look so relax.

 

He decides to sleep on the couch pulling it close to their bed, and he watches his wife and twins sleep before falling asleep himself.

 

-

 

Three years later....

 

"I'm sorry, what?!"

 

"Hanguang Jun, you... You are pregnant with triplets"

 

Lan Xichen passes out before Wei Wuxian has the oppurtunity to while Jiang Cheng, the three junior disciples, and the twins are gaping shock to hear the news.

 

"Ow! Lan Zhan!" Wei Wuxian exclaims rubbing his forehead after Lan Wangji throws a walnut in his direction.

 

"Ow yourself! Triplets, Wei Ying! You gave me triplets this time! I'm giving birth to triplets! Do you know how painful giving birth is?! And it's triplets!" Lan Wangji exclaims rubbing his belly which was already a size of a watermelon and he's even only at the start of his second trimester.

 

"Ah, Lan Zhan don't be angry! It's bad for you and the babies! This one promises he'll help you with everything!"

 

"Go get yourself spayed!"