Work Text:
Anne dropped her backpack on the floor with an audible sigh, briefly leaning against the wall with her eyes shut. She just needed a moment before pulling her mask back into place; no need to worry the others. Kit had won a singing contest yesterday; Jane and Lina had gotten promotions at work; Cathy’s newest novel had just reached the top 50 best sellers list; and Anna...Anna was just always in a good mood. Everything seemed to bounce right off her. No, Anne wasn’t about to burden them with her problems; they didn’t deserve that.
Laughter caught her attention, and she opened one eye suspiciously.
“Kat, don’t you dare throw another one at me, or you will regret it.” Anna warned, and Kit could only laugh.
Anne took a deep breath, plastered a grin on her face, and pushed herself off the wall. When she reached the living room, something papery and light smacked her in the face, and she let out a startled yelp. “Bats?” She raised an eyebrow questioningly.
Kit grinned. “It’s almost halloween! We wanted to get in the spirit!”
Anne blinked. “Cuz, I know Halloween is your favorite holiday, but you’ve still got over a month. It’s not even October yet.”
Kat put a hand over her heart. “How can my own cousin say something so cruel?”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s literally mid-September. That’s just a fact.”
Anna chuckled, bumping her hip against Kit’s leg. “It’s never too early for Halloween decorations, right Kit-kat?”
Kat grinned at Anna. “Exactly!” She turned to Anne, “Honestly, you should be surprised I held off this long. If I had my way, this whole house would be decorated for Halloween year round.”
“Except for Christmas.” Anne supplied. The ‘banter’ was easy to fall into. And it kept her brain focused on the conversation and not everything else.
Kat opened her mouth to respond, then thought better of whatever she was about to say and closed it. A second later, she spoke. “Ok yeah fair. I fucking love christmas. So maybe half the year as Christmas and the other half Halloween?” She turned to Anna, who shrugged.
“Girl, they’re two months apart. If you can figure out how to split it up into six months each, then ok. “
“Ooooh, maybe we could do like December through May for Christmas, then June through November for Halloween!” She silently counted on her fingers, “Yeah, that adds up right.”
Anne snorted. “Good luck convincing Jane about this. At least right now it’s just bats, and she might not lose her shit.”
Kat stared proudly at the hanging creations. “I made them myself--”
“HEY!”
“Ok, fine. Anna helped a little--”
“A little? Girl, I will smack you.”
Kat glared at Anna. “Stop interrupting me!”
“Then give me proper credit.” Anna crossed her arms challengingly. For being almost half a foot shorter, she could be very intimidating when she wanted to.
She grumbled. “Fine. Anna and I made them together. Happy?” That last part was directed at Anna, who grinned.
“Yes. Very much so.” She crossed to Anne and placed her hand underneath the one that had hit Anne in the face. “This one is my favorite. I named her Janet.”
Anne couldn’t help but chuckle. “Dammit Janet?”
“Dammit Janet.” Anna confirmed.
Anne stared at all the tiny little creatures hanging from the living room ceiling. They were so intricate, so detailed. They all had little unique markings--suddenly, Anne felt like she couldn’t breathe. “I-I gotta go.”
She rushed upstairs to her room, slamming the door shut and pacing around her room, trying to get the anxious energy out of her body. What was wrong with her? They were just paper bats, for fuck’s sake!
She continued to pace in the small space that wasn’t covered in either furniture or clothes (yes, she knew she needed to clean her room, but it wasn’t a priority right now), shaking her hands and trying to ground herself.
...
Finally, about an hour later, she collapsed face first on her bed, only to hear a soft knock at her door. “Bobes? Can I come in?”
Anne could only manage a groan in response, and the door opened. She felt the bed dip as Jane sat down. She knew it was Jane of course without even looking. No one else called her ‘Bobes’.
They sat in silence for a moment. Why was Jane here? Were Kit and Anna upset? Eventually, she couldn’t handle the silence any longer, and she sat up, throwing herself into Jane’s arms. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset them; the bats were cute, honest!” She sobbed.
Jane hesitated only a moment, before wrapping her arms around Anne and pulling her onto her lap, just as she had done when Anne was small. Well, small er . She tucked Anne’s head under her chin and stroked her long black hair. When Anne had mostly cried herself out, she responded, “They’re not upset. They’re just worried about you, baby. And frankly, I am too. You love halloween. And you always love seeing the bats at the zoo.”
Anne buried her face further into Jane’s chest/chin. “I should be stronger. I shouldn’t be a burden on everyone.”
“What?!” Jane pulled back and cupped her hands around Anne’s face, “Who told you you were a burden?”
She shrunk under Jane’s intense gaze. “N-no one, I just...you’ve all been so happy lately and I didn’t--I shouldn’t bring the mood down.”
“Anne Boleyn, listen to me.” She tilted Anne’s chin up so she couldn’t avoid eye contact. Shit. “You will never be a burden to us. We’re your family. And you deserve to be heard. And seen. And validated when you’re upset. Bobes, what’s really going on?”
Anne sniffled and buried her face under Jane’s chin again. Hiding was safe. Jane was safe. “I was trying so hard to stay calm.” She started. She hadn’t planned on telling Jane, but once she started, the words just tumbled out of her. “The last 35 minutes of Biology, we had a test. And I asked to sit elsewhere because of my accommodations, but she refused. So I just reminded her I get breaks and she said she’d keep the door open. But 10 minutes into the test she shut the door and told me to ask for my break. But I have communication issues, so I can’t ask. And the whole reason I get breaks is so I don’t tic and overwork myself. Plus having to work like ten times harder than a neurotypical just to get the same result and I hate it and I just wish I was normal but I don’t at the same time and I just--I saw all those bats with their unique markings all in the same place and...”
“It reminded you of how a lot of neurodivergents don’t always get treated nicely for being different.” Jane finished, brushing her hand over Anne’s hair again.
She nodded. “And I didn’t want to bother anyone else because of everything that’s been happening lately, so I tried to act normal and it just spiraled out of control.” She rested her head on Jane’s shoulder, curling into her a bit more. She normally hated being treated like a child, but sitting on Jane’s lap felt safe. She felt like the six year old who felt safe asking her big cousin for cuddles.
“Thank you for trusting me, Bobes,” Jane said quietly, “I know you didn’t want to say anything, and I’m very glad you told me. Do you want me to talk to the school tomorrow about making sure your teachers respect your IEP?”
She shook her head. “I just wanna be done with it for now...Could...could we make cookies?”
Jane rubbed Anne’s shoulder. “Of course! Actually, since Kat and Anna have filled the entire house with bats, why don’t we use the old halloween cookie cutters that Lina got a few years ago?”
She nodded enthusiastically. “And I can help make the frosting and decorate them?”
She chuckled. “As long as you allow the others to help too. And you don’t have to tell them what happened, but you might want to give Kat and Anna a hug and reassure them that you’re okay. They were very worried about you earlier.”
Anne’s stomach sank. She really didn’t want to go through the pain of telling the story again...but they did deserve an explanation. She nodded mutely and looked up at Jane with big brown eyes. “Will you carry me?”
“Goddammit.” Jane muttered, so quietly Anne could barely hear her, “Sure, I’ll carry you. But you have to get off my lap first.”
Anne giggled and climbed off, allowing Jane to stand and stretch. Then, Anne stood on her bed and wrapped her arms around Jane’s neck.
She pulled Anne’s legs around her and trudged downstairs to the kitchen, where Anna and Kat were in the process of hanging more paper bats.
“Anne!” Kit shrieked, running towards her cousins. “You’re okay! I’m so sorry if the bats upset you.”
Anne shook her head, sliding down Jane’s back. “It’s a long story, but I’m not upset about the bats. I actually think they’re really cute.” Her arm bent into the “half dino” position as she called it, where one of her elbows was by her side, with her hand bent like a dino arm. She glanced nervously at Jane, who reassuringly rubbed her thumb on the bottom of Anne’s elbow.
“We were thinking of making some halloween cookies. I believe we have a few bat cookie cutters. You guys want to join.”
Anna grinned. “Hell yeah!” She stepped forward and pulled Anne into a hug, squeezing her tightly. Then, she let go, and leaned forward a little to plant a kiss on Anne’s forehead. “Glad you’re feeling better, love. I was worried about you.”
Kat nodded and hugged her as well. “We both were.” She rested a hand on the crown of Anne’s head, and let her go after a moment.
Anne smiled awkwardly. She loved them both dearly, but right now, words were escaping her. So, she cleared her throat and turned to Anna. “Can you get the flour and sugar and the rest of the dry ingredients out of the pantry? If you can reach, that is.” She couldn’t resist the small jab.
Anna stepped back, raising her eyebrows. “Girl, excuse me? You are shorter than me. You do not get to talk.”
Anne giggled and sauntered further into the kitchen. The day might have started out shitty, but cookies and her family were good distractions. And hopefully tomorrow would be better.