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Nino’s was packed and Blue held her tray of drinks high above her head to avoid sweaty teenagers. She maneuvered her way to the booth at the far back of the room where a group of boys sat huddled around an old journal. Sunlight shone on their table turning the boys into gods made of gold. It was unfair that they could look so poised in such a place.
“Three iced teas,” Blue said to the boys, who had all turned to look at her. “One with lemon, one with sugar, and one with spit.”
“Thanks, Jane,” Gansey said, reaching for extra sugar packets. Blue wondered how he still had all of his teeth with the ridiculous amount of sugar he added to his tea. She winced as Gansey opened four white packages and dumped them in all at once.
Noah flickered into sight next to Adam. “Hello, Blue.”
Looking at Noah and Adam sitting side by side, it was hard to tell which one was the ghost. They both had a faraway look in their eyes, like they could only pay attention to half of what was going on around them. The dark circles under Adam’s eyes that Blue was beginning to think would never go away matched Noah’s smudged cheek. Adam looked as weathered as his fraying uniform, one thread pulled the wrong way and he could unravel completely. Blue itched to say something, but she knew it would only cause a fight.
“When’s Aglionby prom?” she asked abruptly, tearing her eyes away from Adam.
“Not until the end of May I think,” Gansey answered her. “Why do you ask?”
“Just wanted to make sure it wasn’t on the same day as mine, because I’m taking Ronan to prom.”
Every head snapped up. Adam’s eyebrows neared his hairline and Gansey looked like a kicked puppy. Ronan merely wrinkled his nose and set his tea on the tabletop.
“I don’t know where the hell you got that idea, maggot,” he said.
Blue tucked her serving tray under one arm, pushing Adam and his threadbare face to the back of her mind. “It’s on the 17th, don’t forget.” Her tone was final and Ronan shrugged to his friends as she walked away.
Blue jiggled Monmouth’s front door on it’s hinges, letting it swing open. A trick she has learned on her own, but the boys taught her anyway.
“Hello?” she called out. “Gansey? Ronan?”
There used to be a time when Blue felt out of place at Monmouth Manufacturing and would never have just walked in like she did. Now she didn’t think twice as she kicked her boots off before climbing up the stairs. It was her home away from home. A book of stories could be made about late nights spent in Monmouth.
Gansey’s Henrietta model lay deserted in the middle of the room, his bed stripped of blankets and pillows next to it. The bathroom was dark, but Ronan’s bedroom door hung open.Without hesitation Blue walked up and knocked on the doorframe. Ronan only looked up when Chainsaw flew from his lap to come hover over Blue’s head.
He pulled his headphones down around his neck and looked at her, obviously expecting her to speak first. When she didn’t he rolled his eyes and asked, “What? Gansey isn’t here.”
Blue shrugged and moved further into the room, “I came by to make sure you got this.” She reached into her pocket and drew out the tie she had made earlier that morning, smoothing out the creases. She motioned for Ronan to get up. He did and she replaced his headphones with the tie. Pretending to know how to tie it properly, she knotted it around his neck.
“What the fuck is this?” Ronan asked when she was done.
“Its pretty obviously a tie.”
“It looks like shit.”
“Yeah,” Blue agreed. “I made it to match your eyes.”
Ronan let out a single bark of laughter. “Flattery will get you nowhere, midget. I’m still not going.”
Blue shrugged. She didn't believe him. “Whatever you say.”
“C’mon, baby. I know you ain’t got nothing better to do.”
Blue walked away from the boy who had been begging her to go to prom with him since her shift started. “How many times do I have to say never in a million years before you get the message?”
When he first asked, Blue had felt bad for not even knowing his name but now she was ready to punch him in the face. It was like these boys didn’t understand the concept of not interested.
“A million years is a long time.” The boy sighed. Blue thought maybe he was finally giving up until he said, “Look, just be my date for prom and then if you still don’t like me we can talk about it later.” Blue was about to tell him that she was under no obligation to humor him when someone slid up behind her and curled an arm around her shoulders. Ronan spoke before she could mistake him for someone else.
“She’s already got a date. Now scram, fuckass.”
“Woah, dude, sorry. Didn’t know she was yours, bro.” The guy moved back several steps, nearly tripping over a dust mop.
Blue held back a smirk when Ronan replied, “She isn’t mine, or yours for that fucking matter. Get the fuck out of here.”
The boy nodded furiously, literally running past other patrons to get to the door.
“Look who’s Mr Feminist all of a sudden,” Blue said, untangling from Ronan’s arm. He smelled like gasoline, meaning he spent the night at St. Agnes. Blue pitied the lovesick puppy that had become of him. She punched him in the arm.
“I could have handled that myself.”
“I know.” Ronan rubbed his bicep. “I’ll pick you up at eight tomorrow. Be ready.”
Blue watched him walk away until the BMW pulled out of the parking lot with a screech heard from inside the diner.
“Snake boy is on the porch,” Calla called from somewhere in the house. Blue fluffed her dress as she bolted down the stairs. Ronan knocked on the door once before opening it. He didn’t call out when he entered, just looked around the room until he spotted Blue. A casual move made easy with practice.
He was dressed in a wrinkled button up and a pair of navy blue slacks. He wore Blue’s tie loosely around his neck.
Blue grinned and reached for Ronan’s wrist when he got close enough. They didn’t speak as Blue tugged Ronan up the stairs and into the bathroom. They didn’t have to. Over time Blue came to notice that when she was with Ronan, talking wasn’t a necessity. The two of them could sit on her bedroom floor and toss a pair of balled up socks back and forth. Blue had to admit that it was nice to have someone to hang out with and not have to talk to.
When he saw the vest hanging on the towel rack, Ronan sighed.
“Please tell me you’re the one putting that on.”
Blue shook her head and tossed it at him. He shrugged it on with a glare while Blue touched up her make up. She was only wearing a thin layer of pink lip gloss and purposefully smudged black eyeliner.
She stepped back and twirled, the hem of her dress brushing Ronan’s legs. “Well,” she said. “What do you think?”
“You look like a quilt,” Ronan said. He rubbed the back of his neck as if admitting it was extremely awkward. “A nice quilt.”
Blue beamed. She had made the bodice of the dress from various blue and green cloths. She did look like a quilt. A very cute quilt.
She moved to button Ronan’s vest, silently pleased that it fit him. “You don't look so bad yourself.”
A bright light flashed behind Ronan and Blue stood on her tippy toes to see Mr Gray with Maura’s digital camera in his hands. Mr Gray smiled charmingly at Ronan who backed away with a glare. “You two should come down for pictures.”
He turned and walked away, not wanting to put Ronan in a mood. Ronan had focused his anger on Colin Greenmantle when he learned the truth about his father’s death, but he still didn’t want to spend any amount of time in close proximity to Mr Gray.
Ronan breathed in deeply through his nose, exhaling slowly through parted lips.
Mr Gray took several pictures. There were a fair few of Blue and Ronan in the classic prom pose in which Ronan behaved nicely, but there was also one where Ronan pulled a face and one where Blue jumped onto his back, catching him off guard.
Blue spent five minutes laughing and mocking his expression before Maura announced that unless they wanted to miss everything, they had better get going. Maura pulled Blue aside and asked, “I don't have to tell you not to kiss him, right?”
Blue laughed. “I don't think either of us would like that very much.”
Before they left, Blue made Ronan take a selfie with her to send to Gansey. They ended up taking several, making a different face in each one. Blue sent them with the caption: dont wait up xoxo.
Blue tripped over her feet and Ronan tightened his grip on her arm so she wouldn't fall. They burst through the school’s front doors, breathless with laughter.
Behind them the principal shouted, “I’m not even mad! Just give it back!”
They didn’t stop running until they got to Ronan’s BMW.
Ronan held out the stolen toupee for her to take when she buckled her seatbelt. “Your trophy.”
Blue sat the hairpiece on the dashboard. She arranged some strands to fall over the radio. “ I think we should call it George.”
Blue picked at the hem of her dress as Ronan drove. The night hadn’t been as fun as she thought. Only a handful of people had danced and some idiot had spiked the punch with Jack Daniels, of all things.
“That sucked,” she admitted.
Ronan looked away from the road. He was biting the inside of his cheek. After a moment he asked, “Do you trust me?”
There was no hesitation when Blue said, “Yes.”
Ronan grinned toothily as he made a probably-illegal U-turn. He sped back the way they had come, paying no mind to yellow lights and stop signs. Blue clutched the door handle, but she didn’t truly believe that Ronan would crash with her in the car.
The car pulled into the parking lot of a grocery store that burned down the previous summer. Ronan stopped the car and pulled up the parking brake in the darkest corner of the lot. He reached into the backseat before setting a bottle of cinnamon schnapps in Blue’s lap. They looked at each other for a long moment.
“We don’t have to, but you don’t look like you’re ready to go home,” Ronan said.
He was right. Prom was supposed to be something fun and exciting and all that had happened up until this point that was worth mentioning was stealing the principal’s hair. If this had been any other boy she would have told him to drive her home, but this was Ronan. Ronan who, despite his angry and rude demeanor, had come to be one of Blue’s best friends.
“Put on some music,” she said, sliding out of the car and taking the alcohol with her. She climbed up on the hood of the BMW, resting her back against the windshield. She jumped when the car hummed and thumped with the bass of Ronan’s music.
Ronan climbed up beside her, taking the schnapps and spinning the cap off. He took a swig and his features scrunched up for a moment. He handed Blue the bottle.
Blue had always been sensible, no matter what she did. Something in the back of her mind told her that this might not be her best idea, but she took a drink anyway.
She spit all over herself and Ronan. He laughed.
“This is absolutely disgusting,” Blue said wiping her lips. “I have no idea how you do this all the time.” She took another drink, prepared.
Her throat burned as she swallowed. Ronan took the bottle.
“I would say you get used to it,” he said. “But you don’t. Every drink tastes like ass until you’re too shitfaced to care.”
They passed the bottle back and forth in silence, the only sounds around them being the obnoxious synth from Ronan’s car and the faint buzzing chirp of the grasshoppers. Blue shifted, laying her head on Ronan’s shoulder.
“What do you call crystal clear urine?” she asked.
“No.”
“C’mon, Ronan. Just go with it. What do you call crystal clear urine?”
Ronan sighed. “What?”
“1080pee.”
“That was bad,” Ronan groaned. “Why did the mouse go to the party?”
“Because he heard they were playing Parcheesi,” Blue said. “You’ve really got to step up your pun game.”
“So,” Blue said after trading puns for the better part of an hour. “Adam, huh?”
She felt Ronan stiffen beside her before he relaxed again, slumping back against the windshield and her shoulder.
“What about Adam?”
“Well,” Blue said. She knew she was treading on thin ice. Ronan wasn't just some sharp weapon to be wielded. Like everyone else, he was breakable. She didn’t want to ruin what had become a really nice night, but she couldn’t hold back the words. “You like him, right?”
Ronan took a long drink of the schnapps before answering. “Don’t tell anyone.”
He sounded tired and it made Blue’s heart ache. She wanted to wrap her arms around him, she wanted to kick all of his doubts and insecurities in the face. Ronan may be breakable, but he never let it show. He never rolled over and exposed his vulnerability, the soft, fleshy parts of him that wouldn't break. They would tear and bleed and bruise.
“You know none of us care, right?”
“Well I care, so don’t fucking say anything,” Ronan snapped. Blue nodded. It was Ronan’s secret to do with as he pleased, she knew that. It didn't make her want to carry his burden any less
“I think maybe you should tell him,” Blue said.
Ronan laughed, but for the first time that night there was no humor in it. “Yeah, okay. ‘Hey Adam, just wanted you to know that I like your face and kind of want to hold your hand. ‘Kay, bye.’”
Ronan groaned. “Fuck, pretend I didn’t say that.” He took another drink.
Blue took the bottle from him and replaced it with her hand. “I won't tell,” she said.
Ronan asked, “What about Gansey, then?” It was Blue’s turn to take a drink.
She thought for a moment. Out here with Ronan, she could say anything. He wouldn’t repeat anything she said just like she wouldn’t say anything about him. So she told him everything. She told him about how kissing her true love would kill him, and she told him about how her true love was more than likely Gansey.
Ronan listened and pretended not to notice when her voice cracked. When she was done he said, “I’m sorry you can’t kiss Gansey.”
“I’m sorry you can’t kiss Adam.”
“This is getting too serious,” Ronan said after a moment. He slipped away from Blue and held out his hand to help her down. He pulled her to the front of the car where headlights were blinding and spun her around. The lights and the alcohol and the talk about Gansey left Blue's head reeling.
They slow danced to really bad electronica and flailed around to Irish pipes. Blue had kicked off her shoes and danced in circles, careless. Smart, sensible Blue was being careless. Ronan froze for a second when the first notes of a particular song started playing.
“Is--is this Taylor Swift?” Blue asked with a shit eating grin.
“It’s catchy, now shut up.”
“Okay,” Ronan said. “When you’re trying to act sober you need to not laugh as much as possible.”
Blue clutched Ronan’s arm and nodded. She hadn’t let Ronan drive back drunk so they walked six blocks from the burned down grocery store to 300 Fox Way. Ronan’s tie was tied around Blue’s neck and he was carrying her heels in one hand.
“No laughing. Got it.” They climbed up the porch steps and opened the door. The TV in the living room was playing some old black and white movie and Maura and Mr Gray sat cuddled together on the couch.
“Hey mom, we’re home,” Blue said a little too loud to be casual.
Maura jumped away from Mr Gray and Blue wrinkled her nose at the thought of them doing something other than cuddling.
“It’s three in the morning,” Maura said, stepping closing. “The dance ended at midnight.”
Blue tried to keep a straight face. “Yeah, but Ronan and I ditched like, an hour in.”
When Maura raised her eyebrows Blue snorted in an attempt not to laugh.
“Are you drunk?” Maura asked.
Blue’s snort turned into little giggles and Ronan rubbed his forehead. “Way to go.”
Maura rolled her eyes with a sigh and motioned for Mr Gray to follow her upstairs. “Drink water, you two. And remember that when you have a headache in the morning, it is your own fault,” she said as she disappeared up the stairs. Mr Gray ruffled Blue’s hair as he passed her, careful not to get too close to Ronan.
Blue tugged Ronan towards the kitchen. She grabbed a couple bottles of water from the fridge and a bag of pretzels from the pantry before sitting down at the kitchen table. She pulled a deck of playing cards from the catch-all bowl in the middle of the table and started shuffling them.
“Gonna tell me my fortune?” Ronan joked through a mouthful of pretzels.
“I was thinking something more along the lines of Go Fish or maybe Black Jack.”
Ronan shrugged and held his hand out for the cards and started dealing them. He put a draw stack in between the two of them. “Got any fours?”
“Gansey,” Maura said, drawing her bath robe closer to herself. “Can I help you?”
He and Adam stood on the front porch looking like they hadn’t slept. Maura figured that didn’t mean anything. None of Blue’s boys ever slept much, it seemed.
“Sorry to wake you, ma’am, but have you seen Ronan? He and Blue went to prom last night and he hasn’t been answering his phone.” Gansey worried his lip with his thumb as he spoke. Ronan’s car also wasn’t at Blue’s school, Monmouth, or 300 Fox Way.
Maura gestured to the couch behind her, where Blue and Ronan lay asleep. They were still in their clothes from the night before and Ronan had a big red heart painted on his forehead in lipstick. Blue was splayed over Ronan’s chest, her face squished in the crook of his neck.
Adam let out a sigh of relief and Gansey laughed. Maura walked back upstairs. “Good luck getting them up, I have no idea what time they finally went to bed.”
Gansey pulled out his phone and snapped a couple of pictures. Ronan had his arm curled around Blue’s waist to keep her from falling off the edge of the couch and they were both drooling. Gansey smiled, not wanting to wake them up. They looked peaceful, for once. He’d like to keep it that way, if just for a little longer.