Chapter Text
I tell you what. I did my darndest to play cool as all get-out, but the very moment I saw Judy come to the door wearin’ that outfit of hers...Lord have mercy. I can’t explain how someone could get knocked out without bein’ punched, but I do know how it feels .
She was wearin’ a blue, white, and yellow plaid sleeveless shirt with a knot tied in the middle. Blue jeans that fit like they were made just for her. And brown leather boots that came up just above the ankle; not workin’ boots, mind you. But, well, you know. Fashionable .
Never in my life had I ever taken a woman out that looked as purdy as she did. I mean hot dang, she was a sight , and I’d seen lot.
Now hold yer horses, don’t get me wrong. I was fixin’ to treat her real good, be a gentlewoman and all, not take advantage or nothin’. But that don’t mean indecent thoughts didn’t cross my mind.
I wanted to kiss her right then and there.
But my mama and daddy, rest their souls, they done raised me right. Treat a woman kindly, hold the door for her, let her get in the truck first, and never kiss a woman on the first date.
I had every intention to treat her right, and I did. So don’t you worry that she was treated in any indecent way. I treated her like a lady.
Lookin’ at her though...my words came out slower than molasses on a cold day. Can’t say my thoughts were workin’ any better, either.
I’d seen beautiful women before, plenty of times.
But never in my life had I ever felt the way that I felt for her. And seein’ her, lookin’ like she did, it’s fair to say that for a moment, my brain just plain stopped functionin’. Might be my imagination, but I reckon my chrome was shootin’ sparks outta my ears.
Her lips moved but I didn’t hear a dang word. My mama used to say, “Listen here, V. It ain’t that you can’t hear, it’s that you just don’t listen .” I tell you though, I sure was listenin’, but for the life of me I just couldn’t hear a dang thing she said.
“V! You doin’ okay? Lost you for a moment. You with me?”
I wanted nothin’ more in that moment than to be with her. Yes , I thought. Goodness yes, I wanna be with you .
That would be too much though. Wanna take it slow, let her set the pace. So I followed her lead.
“I uh,” I mustered. My throat was dry and I’m not kiddin’, it wasn’t like that a second before I tried talkin’. So I tried again, with more success the second time ‘round. “Yes. Yes ma’am, right here. Just gotta admit. Goodness gracious, Judy. You really, I mean, you look real nice.”
That smile, good Lord I’da passed out. She flashed me that smile, and it felt like time slowed. I was mesmerized by how her lips curled at the edges when she smiled, how her eyes sparkled, even how, dare I say, her cheeks blushed just the slightest. Very slightly. But enough for me to notice.
Oh dang, I was starin’! My eyes immediately went back up to hers.
I have no clue how long it took for me to look back up. I was sensin’ she knew it was quite some time. She looked...I’m just gonna say it. She looked like she was fixin’ to laugh.
And I was sweatin’ like a sinner in church.
I sure hoped she’d still want to go out with me.
Somehow, I was able to form words. “You ‘bout ready to go?”
She smiled again (I think my heart skipped a beat), nodded, walked toward me, and closed the door behind her.
Relief washed over me as I offered her my arm and she accepted.
Then I thought, Hot dang, maybe tonight would turn out good after all.
Y’all when I say it was the perfect July evenin’, I ain’t fibbin’. Gorgeous clear sky, all through the day ‘til the sun started to set. It was a typical Georgia summer night, hot as could be but ‘least there was a cool breeze blowin’ through.
As the sun set, the fairground was lit by the rides; a huge ferris wheel with lights blinking all around that big ol’ wheel, a carousel lit up from top to bottom and inside, and even that gigantic slide on the far end of the fairgrounds had lights.
I took her on every ride that she would let me. I sure hoped she’d consent to joinin’ me on my favorite rides, hopin’ she’d enjoy them as much as I did. And she sure did. Especially the bumper cars. She really smashed the snot outta my car with hers.
Woman sure knows how to drive. Even them bitty little bumper cars.
And it ain’t like I let her win, nah it was nothin’ like that. She plumb beat my butt, fair ‘n square.
Made her smile some more, which made me feel...it made me feel amazing. Seein’ her smile like that, out with me, doin’ somethin’ that brought her joy. I think about that night all the time, I think about certain moments and freeze them, like pictures in my mind.
One of those moments was when she knocked me so hard in that lil’ car that my dang trucker hat fell clean off my head.
When I say she laughed, the whole place lit up, brighter than any of the lights in that entire fairground. And the feelin’ in my chest, right in the middle…
Made me feel so light and free, like I could lift off right there and just fly .
After we went on all the rides, I asked her which was her favorite.
“Well, I’ve always liked the roller coaster, but the bumper cars were probably my favorite so far.” She looked over at me and winked.
I’m so glad my feet knew what they was doin’, ‘cuz once again my brain just stopped .
She asked, “What about yours? Somethin’ tells me it wasn’t the bumper cars.”
I smiled at her and told her, “Well I sure had a lot of fun, doin’ that with you. But I gotta say, my favorite was the ferris wheel.” When I said that, I wondered if she knew my meanin’.
The ferris wheel isn’t the most excitin’ ride at a county fair, I know that. But you know when they get everyone loaded up and it spins a bunch of times? You know what happens next. One by one, they load the people out of each car, and load ‘em up with new riders. Anyway, there we were, at the tippy-top, and everything stopped. We were sittin’ way high up, could see everything down below, people looked like ants wanderin’ ‘round the fairgrounds. So I’m lookin’ all around, amused by the tiny people and how little everything looked down yonder.
But then I turned around and she was lookin’ at me. WHY was I lookin’ at everything and everyone BUT her?!
And man did I want to kiss her right there. I mean throughout the evenin’, dang how many times and how many ways did I imagine what it would be like, to hold her in my arms, to feel what it’s like to have her that close to me. And then, what it would be like when I did kiss her. How she’d feel, how she’d taste…
So anyway, there she was, lookin’ at me, waitin’ for...gotdang how I wish I coulda’ just gone for it. But again, rest their souls, my parents woulda rolled in their graves if I kissed a woman on the first date.
Then the ferris wheel started back up and we were movin’, but it kinda jerked us a bit and her hand went into mine.
And that was it. That was my favorite moment of the evenin’ up to that point.
“The ferris wheel...yeah that was pretty amazing,” She said.
Even with the lights all around us, it was still kind of dark. But I still saw that blush. She was blushin’. And good gravy, my mind was racing like a cat on a hot tin roof.
We were pulled away from the moment by a loud BOOM!
I tell you what, that’s one of my favorite dang sounds in the world - FIREWORKS! Man did it fill my heart with joy! Here I was with this incredible woman at the county fair, which I LOVE more than grits, and there were fireworks, too? My word, that was butter on my biscuits!
There were kids runnin’ around with sparklers, chasing each other and drawing pictures in the air. Reminded me of days on the farm when we’d do the very same, runnin’ around without a thought in our heads, watchin’ those sparklers burn down ‘til they died out. We’d knock ourselves out and play with them dang things ‘til the cows came home. Or ‘til mama would tell us to knock it off.
BOOM! More fireworks! Man was I over the dang moon!
But then...then I looked over at Judy, and she was real distraught.
Something was very wrong.
“Hey,” I asked her. “You okay?”
She crossed her arms and looked down. “Can we get outta here?”
Once again, I offered my arm and we left faster than...well, it was fast . Soon as we got to the truck I opened her door, helped her get in, ran to my side of the truck, hopped in, started ‘er up, and kicked up so much dirt on our exit I reckon we started a dirt storm. Didn’t matter. We were gone.
I waited before sayin’ anything. Didn’t want to push, didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable. I just wanted to let her be. It was clear as day that she was upset, so I wanted to give her some air and let her breathe. Kept my eyes on the road, ‘cept for an occasional glance over at her, just out of the corner of my eye.
We drove for miles and miles, way outta the outskirts of the town, way out yonder where there were no lights and no cars on the road. Just wide, open spaces and uninterrupted, clear skies. I didn’t know where we were goin’. All I knew was that I was takin’ her far away from all that ruckus.
After quite a while, she finally said something. “The fireworks. It...it was too much. I can’t take ‘em. The loud blasts, the bursts of lights. Reminds me too much of-”
“Everythin’ you been through.” I didn’t mean to interrupt her when I said that. I just...her voice trailed off when she said that last part, and the way her breath hitched, I knew that sound. I knew that feelin’. When words were spoken in that tone with that breath right before, the only thing that’ll follow them words is tears. I just felt compelled to say somethin’.
She turned and looked at me. I looked over at her real quick, for less than a second. Gotta stay safe and keep my eyes on the road. But I could feel her eyes on me, and I had to at least look at her.
I asked, “You wanna pull over? Just look up at the stars for a while?”
“That sounds perfect,” she answered.
I found us a real nice open area surrounded by lots of trees and I parked the truck. After I killed the engine, I hopped outta my seat, walked over to her door, opened it, helped her out, and grabbed a few blankets from the rear cabin.
“Gimme just one sec here,” I said. I then set up them blankets in the bed of my truck. I figured it would be nice to have somethin’ soft to lay on. And it’s a lot better than layin’ in the grass where goodness knows what could crawl up into goodness knows where .
I like lookin’ up at the stars. Helps clear my mind when it’s racing like the dickens. So I do this a lot, throw some blankets down in the bed of the truck and just look up, wonderin’ what’s out there in the great yonder.
I ain’t ever done it with a woman before, though. Look up at the stars, I mean.
“C’mon up here,” I said as I reached my hand down to her.
I pulled her up and dang, she stepped up just fine but had a bit too much momentum as she came forward, and instinct kicked in and I couldn’t help but catch her in my arms. I wanted to say sorry, didn’t want to be inappropriate with her.
But she...she held on. I felt her even pull me closer.
I told y’all how good she looked, and my goodness, she smelled even better . Every one of my senses was cranked up to the highest level, and dang if I didn’t feel like I was gonna explode. I don’t know how else to explain it. All I know is that I felt incredible.
Just holdin’ her… I knew I could stay like that all night if she’d let me.
She leaned in closer to me, and man, talk about senses overload.
Gotdang I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to kiss her with every fiber of my being. But I knew, at least I was taught, that’s not appropriate, not on the first date. And I wanted to do right by Judy Alvarez. I wanted to treat her like she deserves to be treated.
With respect.
I took a deep breath, and dang how was it that she smelled even more amazing? I’m just gonna say it. Shit, gotdang. Shit!
I knew I was done for, right there in that moment. There were many moments before this that I could have, should have known what I was really feelin’. But having all those thoughts and feelings before I even put one hand on her paled in comparison to actually touchin’ her. Just holding her close, feeling her body on mine. I ain’t the best with words, y’all. I can’t adequately express how amazing that felt. All I can say is it was like heaven, and I wanted more. I wanted so much more.
But this had to be on her terms.
Somehow, I mustered the gumption to ask her if she still wanted to lay down and look up at the stars.
“Yeah,” she answered. “I’d really like that.”
And so I held her hand and helped her down, and fluffed a bit of the blanket up near the top of the bed of the truck so she’d have something soft to lay her head on. I put my hands behind my head like I always do, and there we were, side by side, in the back of my truck, lookin’ up at a clear night sky.
The stars twinkled above us, and for a long while, neither of us said a word. I kinda liked that, just layin’ with her, bein’ quiet. Now I’m not one to ask a lot of questions, I mean unless I’m interrogatin’ somebody for information. And even then, it’s for work. Outside of work I’d never dig into anyone like that. Not to my friends, not to anyone I care about, and certainly not to a woman I’m taking out on a date. So, I didn’t push. I just let her be.
I figure if she’s layin’ there lookin’ up at the stars, maybe she’s like me and just wants to be quiet with her thoughts. I ain’t ever done this with anyone, so I don’t really know how it works when there’s someone with me. But I do know how I feel when I’m by myself like this, and I like the quiet. It’s one of the rare times that I can actually feel my mind shut up, and I get a little peace.
At first, my mind did wander, thinkin’ about her, about what she might be thinkin’. I did wonder if she wanted to talk, if she needed to get somethin’ off her chest. I mean we were havin’ a great time at the fair, of course ‘til them fireworks went off. I made a mental note to never set off fireworks in front of her. Dang, and I love fireworks. So you know it’s a big deal for me to say I cared more about her than I did about them bottle rockets and firecrackers.
Dang.
I really did like her. I liked her a lot. A hell of a lot.
Dang got me saying hell and all. Lord forgive me.
Time went by, had no idea nor did I give one dang hoot how long we were layin’ there, lookin’ up at them stars.
And even after all that fun we had at the fair (before the fireworks, of course), I gotta say. Being with her like that, just layin’ back, not sayin’ a word, just having a moment lookin’ up at them stars in the sky...I gotta say that was the best part of the evening.
Then it got even better.
The stars weren’t the only ones puttin’ on a show; slow, glimmering yellow-green lights occasionally lit up the air all around us. It was summer, and the fireflies were out, lookin’ for dates of their own.
I couldn’t help but grin, thinkin’ about how romantic that was. What a neat way to tell someone you’re interested in them - just glow a little light outta yer butt and she comes flyin’ over to ya. Huh.
As I was grinnin’ to myself, I felt her hand touch my side. Immediately I pulled my hand out from under my head and reached down. She took my hand, and we let our fingers interlace. It felt so natural, layin’ with her like that, holdin’ her hand and watchin’ the stars and the lightning bugs.
She then turned on her side and faced me; naturally, I did the same. The light from the stars and the fireflies made her eyes sparkle, and that made my heart pound in my chest.
I couldn’t help it. I looked at her lips, and my eyes lingered. She has these lips that just...gosh. I wanted to, I wanted to so bad.
My eyes snapped right back up. I had to remind myself to look into her eyes. Stay focused.
Do. Not. Kiss. Her. On. The. First. Date!
Judy then said, “Thanks for bein’ okay to leave the fair. I know you were lookin’ forward to it, and I was havin’ such a good time with you. I haven’t thanked you for that yet. So thank you. Thank you for a lovely evenin’.”
“It’s my pleasure, Judy. Truly.”
Then she did this thing, and I have no idea how my head didn’t just fly off my neck right then and there. She...she...she licked her lips, leaned toward me…
“But my favorite part,” she continued, “is this. Right here. Layin’ here with you, just...bein’ with you. Away from the city, away from, well, everythin’. This is perfect.”
You’re perfect , is what I was thinkin’. Why didn’t I say it? Forgot to speak again. Forgot how to form words. Couldn't’ get over the fact that we were actually doing this, spending some time together. Outside of work, outside of our lives back in the city. Just here, together. She was here with me, the real me. No roles, no armor, no guard. Completely open.
I wanted to let her in.
The words just spilled outta me.
“I really like you, Judy. I really hope that’s not outta line, me sayin’ that.”
“Well,” she answered, “you did ask me out on a date . And I did accept. If that’s any indication...”
Man, if I’dve said what was really on my mind, I’dve thought she’d taken my truck and left my butt right there in that field...
...or maybe…
Look, before I tell you what I did next, I just need to let you know somethin’. My brain was completely mush, and if you’ve ever been out with someone who is smart, kind, fierce, brave, and indescribably beautiful, you’d get it.
Sometimes when we really like someone, we say the perfect thing at the perfect time.
But most of the time, we say some real dumb shit.
“Y’know why fireflies do that? Light up?”
She answered, “Bioluminescence. Chemical reaction. Enzymes, ions, proteins, oxygen. They all work together to produce light.”
Um...that’s not what I meant, but I didn’t want to be talkin’ out the side of my mouth at her. What I mean to say is I didn’t want to be rude, didn’t want to come across as a smartass.
“That’s a lot of effort for them, usin’ all that science just to tell another bug, ‘Hey! I like you! Git on over here and let me plant a big ol’ kiss on yer lips!”
She laughed at that. Maybe she thought I was an idiot. Maybe she thought I was outta my mind.
Or maybe this wasn’t going too badly.
And then I got a real bright idea…
I brought my other hand ‘round to my pocket and pulled out my lighter. Then, I flicked my lighter.
I kept lookin’ at her and watched as the flame danced in her eyes.
Judy asked me, “What’re you doin’, V?”
“Tryin’a tell ya to come closer.”
And she did.
That was it for me. I was done for.
Y’all, I’m not one to kiss and tell. It’s just not polite, and I wouldn’t ever, ever disrespect her like that. Never ever, not in this life or the next.
But I will say this.
My mama and daddy told me to treat a woman right, to respect her and try nothin’ on the first date. But when I said what I said to her, there was no takin’ it back. And it’s not like I was the one who made a move. I just said some words.
It was her that did the kissin’.
So I don’t think that should be held against me at all.
But again, not one to kiss and tell.
So I won’t say much else.
Except this.
I’m a born and raised Georgia native, and there’s nothin’ on this planet sweeter’n a fresh Georgia peach ripened in the summer sun, picked straight off the tree.
But when I say I ain’t ever tasted anything as sweet as Judy’s lips...Lord have mercy.
I’da thought I’d died right there. Bless my soul, I’da mind to think that I went straight to heaven, and that Judy Alvarez is an angel.
My goodness.
Alright, I’m done.
No...wait, just one more thing.
Her kiss, her lips...so soft, so sweet, so, so incredibly delicious. Everything about her, she tasted absolutely delicious.
Her kiss was just the start of it.
And I’ll leave it at that.