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It’s been a hard day, exhaustion and the weight of his facade weighing on his bones. The day was full of tasks, a few debts to collect and paperwork to fill out. He had been called into a meeting with other officials about plans, and then another, and then another. Usually, he would be able to put up another one of his acts in his neverending performance, but today, his battery was drained by the time the first meeting had ended.
By the end of the day, Ajax could barely keep his eyes open, if not for the fact that if he passed out he would not be able to see his beloved. Kaeya is waiting for him, and that fact pushes him to keep on moving through the bustling Mondstadt street. Usually, he’d take his time, get flowers for his baby, maybe even get his favourite food from Good Hunter, and sometimes stop by to listen to the Bards play. Usually he’d find a way to tip them generously. He thinks that his contribution to the economy is why the glares that are usually given to other Fatui agents are dimmed when it comes to him, but he could also believe that they just wait until the mora has touched their palm and his back is turned to do so. Even so, the fact that they let him keep up his relationship with their beloved Cavalry Captain is enough for him to brave however they decide to treat him.
He remembers just how many people had come up to him to give him a talk, a warning, a threat, to be gentle with the man, lest he end up in a ditch, in a lake, at the end of their weapon. Even his estranged brother ended up pointing a threatening finger and glare at him, to make sure to take care of Kaeya. Or at the very least, not break him further than he already did. It made Ajax laugh, and then retort about how he would have a hand in helping Kaeya heal. It probably cemented something in the elder, as he froze before turning around with one last threat and then he was gone with an angry huff. It was hilarious to see Kaeya walk back to his seat, shock on his face to see the bartender leaving when he wasn’t even supposed to be here that night. He had pointed his thumb and asked what had happened and it just made Ajax laugh harder, hold his boyfriend around his waist and pull him in for a loving kiss. Kaeya responding was always adorable, eyes wide at the sudden affection before closing his eyes and kissing back just as enthusiastically. His hands coming around Ajax’s own waist.
He shakes his head at the memory, knowing how he had so far proved not only his love to Kaeya but also gained the trust of the people around him. His chest only swelled further with pride as he sees his- their!- apartment door come into view, the number of their home etched in gold and hammered to dark oak. The sight still makes him sigh longingly sometimes, as he remembers how he’s made this his third, more permanent home. His first with his family, his second with the Tsaritsa and his fellow Harbingers, and now here, with Kaeya. He lifts his hand to knock until the door swings open to reveal the face that makes all the negative emotions Ajax has melt off him like water. Kaeya smiles and he leans against the door, crossing his arm over his chest as he stares at Ajax like he was the sunset.
“My, my, look what the cat dragged in.” Kaeya teases, tone light, flirty. It lights a fire in Ajax as he walks forward and wraps his arm around Kaeya. The dark haired man shuts his door as Ajax leans into him, lips pressing kisses into the exposed parts of the shorter man’s skin. With every kiss, he hopes to press the love he feels into Kaeya’s skin, hopes that his beautiful, smart Captain receives the prayer of his worship. Kaeya chuckles, and it vibrates right to the tip of Ajax’s toes. “You miss me? It’s only been a few hours, Ajax. ”
Hearing his name from that mouth has Ajax burying his face deeper into the crook of Kaeya’s neck, trying to hide the neediness he truly feels. Somehow, it isn’t close enough. Ajax wants to be so close to Kaeya they can never tell where one ends and the other begins. He doesn’t know what had gotten into him, maybe he hadn’t slept so well the night before. Kaeya coos upon realising that his words had hit the nail too hard on the head. Gentle hands rub his back, comforting circles breaking up tense muscle. Ajax sighs and Kaeya kisses behind his ear.
“Hm… How about you join me for a shower, puppy ?” Kaeya asks after a moment of content silence, both simply standing and swaying slightly and enjoying the other’s presence in their arms. Ajax can only nod, too busy breathing in Kaeya’s warm scent. He smells like vanilla, of clean, fresh Mondstadt air, of the sharp iciness his vision granted him. Kaeya reluctantly pulls away and Ajax can’t help the whine he makes as his boyfriend chuckles in amusement. He shakes his head as Ajax pouts, placing his hands on Ajax’s shoulders and pulling his scarf off his shoulders.
“C’mon. Let’s get ready and get clean, hm?” Kaeya turns and tosses his scarf into their clothes basket. Ajax sighs softly, a small smile on his face, and follows him to their bathroom. Ajax starts to unbutton his shirt and looks up to see Kaeya pulling his shirt off, tossing it onto the counter. He stands to watch, shirt hanging forgotten, suddenly feeling flustered. He’s seen Kaeya naked so many times before, but sometimes in times of intimacy, it still makes him feel like he should look away to give Kaeya the space he needed. He decides to distract himself by continuing to undo his buttons. When he has finished, he looks up to see Kaeya testing the warmth of the water, letting the shower stream hit his hand as he moves the shower curtain aside. Ajax stands there, hands at his side. It’s like the first time he's with Kaeya, so intimate and so delicate of a situation that if he mentioned it, it would shatter. Kaeya pulls away from the stream, waving the water off.
“Well, the water’s fine now. Took a while but- What’re you doing all the way over there, silly?” Kaeya laughs as he glides to Ajax. It makes him blush and Kaeya laughs louder, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. It falls back in place and Kaeya ruffles his hair. Ajax practically preens under his hands and Kaeya hums.
“We should get you a haircut…” Kaeya thinks out loud, fingers feeling the texture and the roughness of Ajax’s split ends. Only Kaeya could ever care about his well being, about his upkeep, like this. Childe would usually keep his hair as usual until it came to a point where he had to cut it lest it pissed the fuck out of him, falling into his face and obscuring his sight. Kaeya wanted him to look neat whenever he could, as he was taught in his upbringing. Ajax found that adorable, loving how he thought that even a monster soldier like him, who’s looks and presentation rarely mattered during fights, should look his best. Kaeya hums as he slowly presses his hands flat against Ajax’s collarbone, clicking his tongue at the litter of new scars around his chest. He traces a new scar, a thin, newly pink line that spans his trapezius. Ajax watches, entranced as Kaeya catches his lip between his teeth.
“What happened?” Kaeya whispers as Ajax hums, placing his hands on Kaeya’s waist and slotting his head onto the crook of his neck and shoulder.
“Stray arrow,” He whispers, fingers tracing the burn scar across his back and shoulder. Kaeya barely feels it, shuddering slightly from the phantom touch. He had admitted once that he never let his flings touch him there, preferring to keep his shirt on. Ajax thanks his Tsaritsa for this, for letting him come close enough to hold Kaeya bare and naked like this. Kaeya hums again, this time cold and calculating as he always does. Ajax laughs and kisses his neck and scar. “Aw, do you want to hunt them down for me?”
Ajax chuckles at the frustrated huff from his beautiful, handsome, man. He remembers asking the same thing when he saw his burn scar for the first time. The first time Kaeya had stayed and had taken his shirt off. He demanded to know who, and Kaeya had just shook his head and said it was a freak accident.
But after much of his own investigation and putting it together, he found out why Kaeya didn’t want to tell him.
Ajax would kill him if Kaeya ever said the word, but he doubts he would. He knows just how important family- estranged or not, blood related or not- was to Kaeya, and he himself agrees. But a deep, angry, part inside of him didn’t always adhere to his morals or rational thought. He’d reign it in as he always did though, for Kaeya.
Also, he tells himself, the perpetrator should be punished justly by having to beg from Kaeya for his forgiveness. It seems though, that he didn’t need to, as Kaeya had already long forgiven him. It won’t stop Ajax from reminding him, though, to make sure he never steps out of line.
Kaeya’s small kiss to his shoulder brings him out of his thoughts again, as it always does.
“It could’ve gotten you in the throat.” Kaeya whispers, vulnerable. “I can’t lose you, Ajax.”
Ah.
Ajax nods, swallows and squeezes Kaeya around his waist.
“Yea, yea,” He nods, and remembers that he has so much to lose if he dies. “It won’t happen again.”
Kaeya hums, rubs his face against his neck, before pulling away again. Ajax looks at his face and Kaeya’s eyebrows are furrowed in thought. It’s cute, and Ajax can’t help but lean down to kiss between his nose and cheek. A hand swats him as a laugh bubbles from the other’s chest.
“You’re not off the hook, smartass,” Kaeya laughs, pinching Ajax’s nose. “But we’re smelly. So we should probably shower if we want to be clean before the water cools.”
Ajax lets Kaeya lead him, and thinks that he could get used to this, as the creak of the knob brings the shower of hot water down onto them.
The steam relaxes his tense muscles, making both of them sigh. It was a long day for both of them, it seems. Kaeya picks up the body wash and dollops a drop in his palm before putting it back. Ajax bumps against his back, using his head to nudge the back of Kaeya’s.
“Hey, where’s mine?” He jokes, annoyingly as Kaeya grunts and tries to wash himself. Ajax annoyingly reaches over, knocking Kaeya in the head. He yells and swats at Ajax’s side, making him squeal and lift a leg up to block him.
“Asshole!” Kaeya giggles and Ajax wiggles up to him to press his nose into his cheek before biting softly.
“Sorry, bub, I just can’t see where it is! You’re in the way...” Ajax whines, and Kaeya pokes his stomach a few times. The action makes Ajax jump and jolt before Kaeya reaches behind him, and as if he was ever knowing, picks up Ajax’s showergel. It makes Ajax giggle as Kaeya grabs his loofah and shoves them both in his hands before pulling away with a smug smirk.
“There. Now go wash yourself, stinky .” Ajax flips him off fondly as he lathers the soap on his arms. Kaeya’s giggles fade off as he gets to cleaning himself. The quiet and peace of their actions makes Ajax’s heart flutter. He prays silently to his Tsaritsa again, wishes for this moment to stay forever. The mundanity of it all, it makes him wish he and Kaeya had no other destinies that they couldn’t control. He feels his jaw clench, trying to hold back the unfairness of so many things. He jolts when he feels cool fingers at his neck, goosebumps running up his arms and neck. A soft shush has him relaxing, realising it’s nobody but Kaeya who’s currently softly digging the tips of his fingers into the muscle surrounding the base of his neck. Ajax sighs, eyes fluttering close. If he weren't currently standing in front of Kaeya, he would’ve probably slid down the shower wall by now. Kaeya chuckles, warm and melodious, at the other man’s reaction.
“My father used to do this whenever I didn’t feel well,” Kaeya whispered, a soft lilt to his voice. He shakes his head fondly as Ajax leans further into his chest, already limp from a whole day of work. Kaeya makes a surprised sound as Ajax grunts. “Oh, you’re really tense, hm? Busy day?”
Ajax nods minutely as Kaeya digs his finger deeper into the back of his neck. He can feel the tendons in his neck slowly unclench, relaxing under Kaeya’s skilled hands. Ajax sighs as Kaeya kisses his shoulder. He eventually stops his ministrations, before moving to get the shampoo bottle.
“C’mon, let’s get your hair washed, hm?” Kaeya lathers the shampoo in his hands before slowly threading his fingers through his hair, rubbing the treatment into his scalp. Ajax sighs again, eyes closing as Kaeya’s fingers rub the stress from his mind like he did to the tension in his neck. Kaeya chuckles, watching as Ajax slowly lets the tension leave his body. His fingers are so nimble, years of swordwork and playing instruments under the upbringing of nobility tuning Kaeya’s hands into an extension of his work. Precise, deadly, gentle and steady, rubbing delicate circles into Ajax’s hair. The touch makes Ajax’s neck slack, leaning back despite Kaeya not needing it to reach him. He feels the vibration from Kaeya’s chest, it makes his own tighten, makes his eyes water. Weird, because none of the shampoo is getting into his eyes. His nose feels watery, and then he feels Kaeya’s fingers slow, the same way they always do when he realises he’s holding onto something fragile.
“Oh, Ajax,” Kaeya whispers, slowly rubbing the shampoo into the sides of his head, softly moving his head to make Ajax look at him. Ajax sniffs, and shakes his head, slowly pulling away to touch the tears he’s crying. It’s been a while since he’s held this emotion in his chest, too busy chasing the next high of a fight, of holding his head above the drowning sound of the Abyss. Kaeya rubs his back, pressing his palms into the muscles of Ajax’s shoulder blades. It makes Ajax sigh, sounding too much like a sob. He doesn’t like this, he should be happy, he should be euphoric at how much Kaeya is touching him but somehow he feels a strange feeling of fear and relief. Relief that someone still wants to touch him despite knowing everything, fear that he’ll eventually lose this once they’ve seen enough. Kaeya coos, tells him to let it out as he wraps his arms around Ajax’s. He’s kissing his neck and pressing close, cocooning him in warmth and grounding him. His body shakes as he quietly cries, Kaeya keeping himself as close as possible despite the snot and slobber. He slowly shifts him to face him, and Ajax doesn’t hesitate to lean into his neck.
Kaeya hums softly, and he realises it’s a lullaby Ajax himself had sung whenever he had a nightmare. Somehow it makes Ajax sob harder into Kaeya’s neck, clinging to him despite what should’ve been an awkward position.
But not to Kaeya, whose eyebrows are furrowed in worry and his eyes are clenched shut, staving off his own tears. Ajax sniffles as he shudders in his arms and it makes his chest clench at how fast his beloved’s heart is beating. Kaeya sings, and when he forgets the word he hums the tune, moving to kiss behind his ears, ignoring the soapy sting of his hair.
Eventually Ajax’s tremble dies down and Kaeya moves to grab the shower head.
“Let’s wash off. We can sleep after this, okay?”
“I don’t want to ruin your sheets…”
Kaeya chuckles, his nose crinkling cutely as he pulls away to rinse the suds off of Ajax.
“Don’t worry, Ajax. I’ll dry you off.” Kaeya whispers, and kisses his lips before gently maneuvaring the water. Ajax complains about not being able to wash his hair and Kaeya promises him a next time. It makes Ajax’s heart flip, even though he knows it would happen again eventually.
When they are both clean and dry, Ajax tucks himself between Kaeya’s arms, taking in the familiar scent of his shampoo and body wash. Kaeya chuckles, his fingers playing with Ajax’s hair as he reads his book. It’s a book of children’s tales from Ajax’s childhood, and Kaeya kisses his head as he hums and sings the words he could recall from the lullabye earlier. It makes Ajax smile, snuggling deeper.
He falls asleep and dreams of an endless night sky, of a warm body and a peaceful sleep. He can’t wait to wake up again, but for now, he is content.