Work Text:
Love: an intense feeling of affection for another. An emotion that can influence the way one acts. However, there are two very contrasting standpoints on love- romantic and platonic. While platonic relationships could just be a simple bond between friends, romantic relationships tend to be much more intimate. What both do have in common are making one feel like they are on the top of the world or making them feel vulnerable and exposed to hurt.
And while they do seem to be easily distinguished, many have trouble differentiating between the two. They might not know if they want to simply be friends with the person at hand, or if they want to take their relationship to another level.
Though even if one engages in a romantic relationship, there’s no telling for sure that the sailing will be smooth from there on out.
I love you.
Three simple words- which should be relatively easy to express, right? That’s not always the case, though: it’s not uncommon for people to have trouble saying those words, especially if they were to declare their love for the one whom they intend to spend the rest of their lives with. Are they sure they are the one? Are they willing to risk making their emotions vulnerable to tell their partner the truth? Questions similar to those might flock one’s mind when it comes to this. And even if their love is genuine, fear of rejection can often lead to hesitation as well. Given this, if and when someone accepts and even welcomes their love with open arms, for many, that’s the best feeling in the entire world.
Tapping her finger anxiously on the desk as she stared blankly at her laptop screen, Catra sighed to herself and leaned her back against her chair, letting her head tilt up to the ceiling as she closed her eyes. I hit a brick wall, she thought, my next deadline for this book is next week but I’m stuck. I don’t know what to do! Fuck, I was so confident while I was brainstorming this piece but now that I’m actually writing it, it’s kinda shit.
Pinching the bridge of her nose, Catra groaned and then a second later, her eyes opened suddenly. I know how to fix this! Gotta make the characters more mysterious- it is a mystery and horror book after all. Make the side characters more relatable, not just the main ones. Make the words not so straightforward- less dialogue and more description! More tension and make it more sinister! Write the gore so the readers can be like: Ah! What the fuck? Catra you’re a fucking genius.
She typed away and after she finished that section of her story, Catra closed her laptop, stood up, and stretched her arms. Sitting in a chair for the past four hours had really taken a toll on Catra’s back, well that’s what she gets for wanting to be a writer. She yawned and rubbed the aching lower part of her back and turned her head to look at the time.
“Have you finished for the day?” someone said as they wrapped their arms around Catra from behind her.
Sinking into the warm, comforting embrace, Catra nodded. “Yeah I just finished. Most of the time I was just staring at the screen but hey, at least I managed to figure it out. But there’s still some areas that I need to edit but I’ll do that tomorrow- or maybe even tonight if I feel super motivated,” she grinned.
Her girlfriend, Adora, snorted and kissed the top of her head. “I’m glad! You can do this Catra, you already released one best seller book, I have no doubts that you can do it again!”
“Thanks, Adora,” Catra said, turning around to face her blonde idiot, “hearing that from you gives me more confidence.”
“I’m here for you whenever you need me,” Adora said with her usual dumb, big, smile that Catra adored. (Haha, get it?) She stared at her watch and cursed. “Well- not right now, I have to go into the clinic now.”
Crossing her arms and raising an eyebrow, Catra scoffed. “You better drive safe. Please don’t almost get into an accident again.”
Adora shrugged. “Well I am a lesbian- we’re known for being shit drivers.”
The other rolled her eyes. “And you’re just contributing to that stereotype, not me though, I’m a fucking amazing driver.”
“And you also have road rage,” Adora said, sticking out a playful tongue that just made Catra shove her at her side. “Okay plus, I only almost got into an accident once ,” Adora said, holding up her index finger. (“One time too many,” her partner replied sassily.) “That Mustang came out of nowhere!” She frowned when she saw the worried look on Catra’s face. “Look, I better be going now, traffic is not a pleasure on the freeway at this time- at least I have a great playlist to listen to during it though!” She chuckled and nudged Catra. “Thank you for the song recommendations by the way,” she said in an exaggerated sweet tone.
Catra grinned. “Oh it was nothing, I have a bajillion Spotify playlists just laying around.”
Looking at her watch, Adora cringed. “Okay, I better actually be going now, I’ll see you when I come back, okay?” Adora pecked Catra on the lips. “I love you, bye!”
Catra gave her a small smile as she watched her put on her shoes and walk out of their shared apartment. “Bye,” she said, a second after Adora closed the door.
Letting out an exhausted sigh, Catra walked over to the couch and collapsed on it. When she did, their cat, Melog, immediately jumped next to her, sensing that she needed some aid at that moment. Looking over at the night-black cat, Catra stroked him behind the ears, thankful that she isn’t completely alone and vulnerable with her thoughts right now.
“I love you, bye!” Adora’s last words to her before she went to work echoed in Catra’s head.
The girl groaned and buried her face into her hands. The couple has been together for almost six years. They first got together in their senior year of college and now they’re 26 years old, with their own jobs, a shared apartment, and a cat- who is practically their baby. So, yeah, they’ve been pretty invested in their relationship.
However, something has been eating in the back of Catra’s mind, more so recently than before. Sometimes she doesn’t understand how they got together. Adora and her were basically opposites from each other. Adora was the life of the party- the type of person that could light up a room if she just simply walked in it- the type of person who could make someone else happy if they just looked at her. But Catra? Catra was not like her. She was the type of person you would find in the corner of the room, sipping on a cup of beer that she hated but still drank to fit in with others to seem fun.
Of course Catra is thankful that Adora came into her life- if she were to go back in time she would have liked to meet Adora sooner so they could have more time together! Adora has changed her life for the better and taught her so many valuable things!
But even after that…
“Even after all that,” Catra said, lifting her face from her hands, “I still can’t say 3 simple fucking words.”
Catra watched Adora as she stared at the floor and fiddled with her hands. “What’s wrong? Come on, Sparkles and Arrow Boy are waiting for us.”
“Wait, I need to tell you something,” Adora said softly.
She blinked. “Alright, then tell me.”
“We’ve been dating for a while now,” Catra nodded, they have been dating for four years already, so that’s way more then: a while. “And a couple of months ago I have been feeling some things towards you. Like, back when I asked you out. But it’s not that I just like you, it’s something more… Catra,” Adora looked up, staring into her girlfriend’s mismatched eyes, “I love you.”
It felt like time stopped.
Catra’s mouth gaped open but she stayed silent. Why was her heart beating so fast? Why is her throat closing up? Damnit! Hurry and say it before you physically can’t! She should say it back, shouldn’t she? But she couldn’t. But why can’t she say it back? She does love Adora back! She feels the same way that Adora felt for her! But why can’t she just say it? Despite all of her thoughts screaming at her to reply, nothing came out of Catra’s mouth. All she could do was just stare at Adora, who was anxiously waiting for a response.
They stood like that for a couple more seconds until Adora turned a deeper shade of red, embarrassed that she just confessed her feelings and got nothing in return. Who wouldn’t be embarrassed by that? Silence was definitely not what Adora was expecting from her girlfriend of four years, she wanted an answer back.
“S-sorry!” Adora exclaimed. “I… just wanted to tell you that! I just wanted to come clean, if you don’t feel that way too yet then it’s okay! Take all of the time you need,” she said, managing to crack a smile. “I’m going to go back downstairs to the restaurant, I’ll see you there, okay?”
All Catra could manage was to give her a small wave.
Adora wanted to cry when she walked down from the balcony. She wanted for once for Catra to spill out her feelings, to be truthful with her about her emotions, just one time. In the four years they’ve been dating, Adora hasn’t asked for one thing, but now she wants to grab Catra by her collar and make her say it back. But she knew that wasn’t the correct thing to do, so she ended up suppressing her feelings for now, bottling it up and casting it into the ocean like always.
Frowning at the memory, Catra sighed. It’s been two years since that. Two years and Catra still can’t give Adora an answer. The girl leaned back on the couch and stared blankly at the ceiling. Even though she and Adora have had a talk about it and Catra explained that she does feel the same way as her but she just can’t get the words out, Catra still feels shitty about it, especially since she wasn't sure if Adora believed her at the time.
The girl shivered when she pictured Adora’s broken face during that conversation two years ago.
At least now Adora knows that Catra was telling the truth. Adora did so much for Catra, staying with her in a time of uncertainty when their relationship was in a rocky place, and all Adora wants is for Catra to admit her feelings but she still can’t even do that.
Besides her, Melog curled up next to Catra as the girl murmured to herself. “It’s been so long and I still can’t say it.” It’s all her fault. She cursed under her breath and shook her head. “Don’t think about that witch,” she told herself. “But, what if because I can’t say it back, Adora will leave me since she doesn’t know my true feelings for her? I mean, I would leave if I think that the person I’m with didn’t love me. Hell, I’d break up with them and find someone else who would love me. But… would Adora do that? If Adora were to do that it would have been during that rough patch of our relationship though… but shit, that doesn’t mean you’re still safe, Catra!”
“I don’t want that to happen,” she whispered to herself. “I don’t want her to leave me all alone. I do care for her. I do… love her.” The word felt odd in her mouth, like it was too big to fit in her vocal cords, but she managed to say it and that alone was celebratory. “But she doesn’t know that,” she muttered. “At least, not yet?”
It’s been a couple of days since Catra has told herself to get her shit together and just finally admit her feelings to Adora. Even though the girl was so determined and confident that she would be able to do it, whenever Adora was with her, instead of saying “I love you,” she would… well just see for yourself.
Watching the TV with Melog beside her, Catra looked up and saw Adora come out of the bathroom from a shower. “What are you guys watching- Hi Melog!” she exclaimed in a high-pitched tone when the cat came to greet her, rubbing her fur all over her slightly wet calf. Picking the cat up, she sat next to Catra and planted a kiss on her cheek.
“Just a show about gay witches,” hummed Catra. She looked over at Adora who was watching the TV in awe. “U-uh can I tell you something?”
“Of course! What’s on your mind?”
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, Catra thought over and over in her head. You make me feel happy and even though it’s been long overdue, I want to let you know that I do really love you.
Staring into Adora’s lovely sky blue eyes, Catra was starting to freeze. It felt like suddenly her throat was closing up and she couldn't speak. Well she had to say something to Adora! “Did you know that jaguars are considered a chunky cat?”
Idiot! Why would you say that?
Catra wanted to die right on the spot.
Adora blinked at that and then suddenly bursted into a fit of laughter. “Woah really? They seem so muscular to me! But that’s awesome! I didn’t know that!”
Nodding and then turning her head back to the TV, she let out a sigh through her nose. Not as awesome as the thing I was supposed to tell you.
“Damnit! Damnit! Damnit!” Catra yelled. “Why can’t I fucking say it?” She looked down at Melog who was probably wondering why one of his mom’s was like this. “Why can’t I say it?” At that, Melog just turned around and left, he definitely did not have a solution to Catra’s problem.
Plopping down on her chair, Catra buried her face in her hands.
Whenever Adora is home, I’m either writing because DT won’t give me a fucking break, or I end up saying some stupid shit like cat facts! What is wrong with me? I mean… a lot of things but what the fuck?
She took a deep breath. Calm down. You can do this. Just relax and just tell her everything. It’s just three words right? Sure those three words are heavy with meaning and all that shit, but it’s still just three words, right?
Saying those three words ended up being a bit delayed. Catra was getting busy since her editor, DT, was not giving her a break and wasn’t the best at scheduling so she had to write some parts ahead of schedule. But since she was busy writing, that ended up fucking up her sleep schedule and since Adora was already busy with working at the clinic as a physical therapist, they didn’t get to see each other often even when they live in the same apartment.
Frustrated that she still couldn’t get her words out and just admit it to Adora and frustrated that DT is tightening her schedule more, Catra was on her fifth cup of coffee. It was only 9 in the morning too!
“Leah took Haley’s hand in her’s,” Catra spoke to herself as she typed on her laptop, “ ‘Back at the ball, before things just turned into complete shitshow, I wanted to tell you something. Can you lend your ear?’ Haley nodded, tucking her thick blonde hair behind her ear, she was always a good listener. ‘I know when we first met, we didn’t get on the right foot. I mean,’ Leah chucked, ‘whenever I had to serve you a meal, I spit in it a bit.’ Haley blinked at her. ‘You what?’ Waving her hand, Leah shrugged. ‘We’ve made out multiple times, I think you’re familiar with the taste of my saliva.' Haley turned bright red and crossed her arms, scoffing a bit to herself. ‘Plus, that’s in the past,’ Leah continued. ‘Anyway, back to what I was saying… We've been through a lot of things together and I think that those moments brought us closer together and we were able to come to an understanding. I’m thankful for that and I’m thankful for you for staying at my side. But… I don’t want to just be a servant who is there for your guilty pleasures anymore. I don’t want to do that type of stuff with a just a friend.’”
Grinning to herself since she was getting to the juicy part, Catra continued to mutter to herself as she wrote. “Leah’s grip around Haley’s palm tightened. ‘What are you saying?’ she said, barely above a whisper. She was so quiet that Leah had to practically lean in to hear what Haley said. ‘I’m saying,’ Leah muttered, her face heating up, ‘I love you. Whenever I’m with you, I never want to leave. I could never dream to be in a life without you. In simpler words: I want to be something more to you. Not just a toy for you, but a real lover.’ Haley smirked. ‘About time you said it, you big idiot.’ She let out a sigh. ‘Fine, my heart is in your hands, Leah Ginerisey, if you dare to break it- I’ll fucking kill you.’ Leah stepped forward, their lips only a couple of centimeters apart. ‘Feisty as always, Your Majesty,’ she whispered before closing the gap between them.”
Closing her laptop, Catra stretched her arms. “Gotta edit that part later before DT looks at it.” She laughed to herself. “Jokes on you, my dear readers, they’re going to be together for only a millisecond before something terrible happens to Leah- I mean it’s not even supposed to be a romance book, I don’t do that shit. This is supposed to be a horror and mystery .” She smiled wickedly. “But I do love to incorporate a bit of romance into my horror novels so I can make the readers feel at ease a bit from all of the tension and then break the couple up to destroy them. Favorite part of my job.”
She blinked. “I just wrote a love confession,” she realized. “I actually wrote many love confessions and they always come easily to me.” Catra suddenly stood up. “Why can’t I just say it then! I’m a writer, damnit! I know my way with words! I write love confessions but I can’t say three fucking words? How fucking ironic!”
Waiting anxiously for Adora to come back from work, Catra quietly recited her confession to Adora. After a couple of practices, Catra took a deep breath. “I got this, I got this. You got this!”
The door opened and Adora came in, tired from work and ready to take a shower and just go to bed. “Oh, hey Catra! Were you waiting for me? Aw, you really do care!” she said, hugging Catra and kissing her cheek.
“More than you know,” Catra said.
“That’s sweet, anyway, I’m going to take a shower-”
“We need to talk!” Catra yelled suddenly, even making Adora jump a bit.
Adora turned to her. “Alright, about what? If this is about the dishwasher, how about I clean the dishes and you just unload it back into the cabinets?” Seeing the look on Catra’s face, Adora blinked. “This isn’t about the dishwasher, is it?”
“It’s not.”
“Oh.”
They stood there, in an awkward silence, Catra fiddling with her fingers and Adora just wondering what Catra was thinking.
Fuck, just say it! she thought to herself. You recited this multiple times! Just go for it! Fuck- my throat is closing up, it’s now or never Catra!
“Did you know tiger cubs are born blind and only half of the cubs survive?”
Why are you like this?
Adora gasped. “No! Not those poor tiger cubs! Aw man, that sucks. That’s great- I think? Well, I’m exhausted. The patient today was really difficult to work with, I’ll tell you about it during breakfast tomorrow! I’m going to take a shower now, are you going to head to bed now?” Adora said she coughed into her elbow violently. She turned her head and looked at Catra who stared at her worryingly, but Adora just shrugged. “Eh, nothing a bit of surgery can’t fix,” she winked jokingly.
Seeing that Adora was still waiting for an answer for her previous question, Cata looked at her watch. “Uh… I have some work left to do, but you just go ahead, I’ll be there in a couple of minutes.”
Kissing Catra on the corner of her lip, Adora smiled at her and walked towards the bathroom. “Since I think I’m going to be asleep before you, good night, I love you!”
Watching her girlfriend disappear behind the bathroom door, Catra sighed. “That was my line” She thought about the dumb fun fact about tigers she thought and internally yelled to herself: God fucking damnit!
If she wanted to, she would scream it at the top of her lungs, but she didn’t feel like getting a noise complaint the next morning.
Ever since that day when Adora confessed her love for Catra but Catra didn’t quite do the same, things between the couple have been a bit tense. Catra knew that Adora was trying her best to keep a smile and not bring up the topic, but she knew well enough that the girl was hurting inside.
“Adora,” Catra said, “can we talk real quick?”
Sitting on the couch, Adora turned her head to face Catra who was at her study. “Uh… yeah sure, what about?”
Catra averted her eyes. “About what happened a couple of nights ago. I think I need to explain myself.” She got up from her desk and sat next to Adora on the couch. “It’s not that I don’t feel the same way as you- I do! I really do.”
“Why didn’t you say it back then?” Adora asked, knowing full well that she is sounding a bit childish.
Sighing, Catra held Adora’s hand. “It’s… complicated. Look, a long time ago back when I was with my foster mom,” Adora looked over at Catra who was staring at her hands, “let’s just say she didn’t treat me the best. I was at the orphanage for years until she adopted me since no one really wanted to have a child with behavior issues. But anyway, when she adopted me, she was always really mean to me and always manipulated me into thinking that no one else besides her would love me befores her.”
“Since, again, no one wanted me except for her, I thought that was true,” Catra admitted. “Even though she would emotionally abuse me- which fucked me up since that happened to me when I was young- she would always say ‘it’s because she loved me.’” The girl chuckled a bit. “And so, I believed that all love was like that, so I started to hate love since I didn’t want to go back to that pain again.”
Squeezing Catra’s hand softly, Adora stared at her with a strong look of determination in her eyes. “Love is not like that! It’s a beautiful thing that blossoms in your heart! Well- at least that’s how I interpret it- you’re the writer here not me!” (Catra laughed, “I know, you taught me that.”) “Look, I’m so sorry about what happened to you with your foster mom, I know you told me about her before, but I didn’t know that it influenced you like this that much. I’m sorry for acting weird about what happened a couple of nights ago.”
“You have every right to,” Catra said. “I understand why you would be upset and I just want to tell you that I do feel the same way as you! I really do. I just… need some time before I can say those words, you know what I mean?”
Adora nodded and smiled. “I get it. Thank you for opening up to me- that’s really all I wanted. Take all the time you need. Just know, I’m just going to stay right here, waiting for you.”
“It feels like it’s been forever since we’ve hung out like this.”
Putting down the lunch menu, Glimmer groaned. “For real! We’ve all been busy since we have actual jobs now instead of just working at like a cafe or something. But now we’re not broke and I get to spend my big-girl money!”
Nodding his head, agreeing with his girlfriend, Bow laughed. “Right? Though sometimes working with kids makes me wanna… I love kids though! I promise I do!” he said when Adora raised an eyebrow at him. “I knew what I was getting into when I chose to be an education major.”
Adora laughed. “Hey, I get it, I work with kids sometimes too.”
“We all work with kids- besides Catra!” Glimmer said. “Well, only a little bit for me, but still! Sometimes I work with them, being a dietician and all,” she said proudly.
Bow hummed. “Speaking of Catra, she’s not going to come? Not even late?”
Sighing, Adora shook her head. “Nope, she has some deadlines to work on- oh, also I need to talk about Catra.” The couple immediately focused all of their attention on Adora when they heard her. “She’s been acting really weird around me these days.”
“If she’s planning on breaking up with you, you better know that I’m going to be throwing some hands!” Glimmer yelled.
Bow snorted. “Now that’s a fight I’d like to see.”
Adora just rolled her eyes playfully. “Please, we’ve been together for almost six years now, she’s not going anywhere,” she joked. “Plus, Catra definitely doesn't feel that way, she’s just been… weird.”
“Weird how?”
Shrugging, Adora sighed. “She’s been more on-guard than usual and she’s been into cats… more than usually recently. I don’t know, okay? She’s just not acting like herself and I can’t seem to ask her why because we’ve both been busy!”
Glimmer crossed her arms. “Well, her name is Cat- ra, I wouldn't be shocked if she was spitting out cat facts left and right.”
Nudging his girlfriend, Bow grinned. “You know that Catra doesn’t like you making puns out of her name.”
Putting her hand over her eyes, creating a fake visor, Glimmer pretended to scan the area. “Do you see Catra? Because I don’t!”
Laughing at how ridiculous her two best friends are, Adora smiled. “So how are you guys doing?”
“Good!” Glimmer replied. “We’re going to be out of town next week since we’re going on a camping trip for our anniversary. Bow wanted to make s’mores so I decided to just book a camping lodge so we could connect with nature while making s’mores!”
Bow looked over at Adora and chuckled. “You know she likes to go all out with this type of stuff.”
“That sounds fun!” Adora said. “Maybe another time we could go camping all together, the Best Friend Squad reunion!”
“That’s a great idea,” Bow nodded. “It’ll be fun to see Catra again after a while, won’t it, Glimmer?”
Grinning maliciously, Glimmer hummed. “I can’t wait to see that furball again!”
Looking at the lunch menu, Adora laughed. “Uh… anyway, we were here for lunch, so wanna share a plate of potato wedges?”
“Holy fuck,” Catra muttered to herself, “Adora’s out right now so I should really think about what I’m going to say to her. But whenever I think about what I say to her, I end up not saying it and end up saying some stupid shit like a fact about a fucking lion or something.”
She looked at her phone that was sitting on the couch beside Melog and picked it up. Dialing a number, Catra hummed as she waited for the person to answer. Within three rings, they picked up.
“ Oh hey Wildcat! How’s it going?”
When she heard her best friend’s voice, Catra smiled. “Hey Scorpia, can you come over?”
“I’ll be there in 5.”
“So, what’s up?” Scorpia asked, sitting on the couch and greeting Melog with a lot of ear scratches.
Catra sighed. “I told you about the whole I love you thing about Adora, right?”
“Remind me again?”
Pinching the bridge of her nose, Catra let out a groan. “Alright, basically I’m trying to tell Adora that I love her for the first time during our six year relationship. I mean, obviously I love her, but I just can’t get the words out and whenever I try to talk to her about my feelings and admit it to her, I end up saying some stupid shit like funfacts about cats apparently!”
Snapping her finger, Scorpia nodded. “Oh right… Yeah I remember. So you need my advice?” Catra nodded. “Good call, I am in a relationship where I love that person very much! Lemme think… how did I say I love you to Perfuma?” She laughed when she remembered. “Oh right, uh… let’s not do that for you. Anyway, maybe those times when you tried to tell Adora weren’t the right time then? In my opinion, I think you should be in the moment to tell Adora. Don’t plan it out, just be in the moment and say the things that come from the heart.”
Catra blinked. “So… no planning?” Scorpia shook her head. “Well, I guess winging it would work, maybe, all the times that I wanted to tell Adora, was planned so maybe I should switch it up.”
Clapping her friends on the shoulder, Scorpia grinned. “You got this Wildcat, love is a beautiful thing! Just listen to your heart and you’ll know what to say!”
Placing her hand over her chest, Catra whispered, “Listen to my heart… huh?”
Leaning back in her chair, Catra let out a deep sigh. Finally, I’m fucking done. That was the last draft I sent to DT. Now I just have to wait for them to get back to me. She heard the door open and raised an eyebrow. Adora’s home? Shouldn’t she be at work today?
The girl got up and went over to the front door to see her girlfriend taking off her shoes. “Adora, you don’t have work today?” Catra asked, leaning against the wall.
“Huh?” Adora looked up at her. “Oh, nah. I forgot I had a day off today, so when I came into the clinic they just shoved me out of the door and told me to go home because I’ve been covering a lot of shifts recently and just helping out a lot. Well, I kinda have to, I’m still pretty new there and learning, but they wanted me to have a break, so here I am!”
Bringing Adora into a hug, Catra buried her head into the crevice of Adora’s shoulder. “Welcome home.”
Surprised, Adora let out an awkward laugh. “What’s wrong? Did you miss me that much? Come on, we live together!”
“True, but we barely spend time together these days, especially since you’re busy at the clinic and always come back at night,” Catra muttered. “And when I wake up in the morning, you’re already gone. So yes, I do miss you that much.”
Kissing Catra on the top of her head, Adora smiled. “Then what do you want to do together now that we both have the day off- wait, today was the day you finished your drafts right?” Catra nodded. “Perfect! We both have the day off! Let’s do something fun together!”
Catra grinned. “I know exactly what to do on our day off.”
“Adora,” Catra said, “stop eating the cookie dough. At this rate we’re not going to have dough left to make cookies- which was the entire point of this- plus you might get sick.”
Licking the sugar off of her finger, Adora smiled from ear to ear. “But it’s so good!”
Rolling her eyes, Catra crossed her arms. “You’re being a bad example to Melog!” The both of them looked over at the cat who was lazily lying down on the counter, watching his moms bicker with one another.
Sighing, Adora frowned. “Fine, fine, I’ll stop eating it!”
“Good,” Catra said, “plus, it’ll taste better when it’s actually baked with a side of milk or ice cream! Here, the oven finished preheating, let’s hurry up and shape the rest of the cookies into balls and just put them into the oven.”
The two of them worked in perfect harmony and silence and in a minute or so, they finished up shaping their dough and Catra even let Adora eat some of the leftover dough since she was: feeling generous today.
Opening up the oven for Adora, Catra hummed. “Okay, just place the cookies on the second rack.”
“Gotcha!” Adora said, walking over to Catra as she held a large play of ready-to-be-baked cookies. “Second rack- fuck!”
To this day, Catra doesn't know how she did it, but as she was walking towards her and then oven, Adora tripped over nothing and fell on top of Catra, causing the tray to go flying out of her hand.
“Ouch, ouch, ouch,” Adora winced. She looked down and saw Catra underneath her. “Fuck! I’m so sorry Catra!” She looked around the kitchen floor and saw Melog licking some of the fallen cookie dough. “Melog- shoo!”
“Told you that you were being a bad example for Melog,” Catra grumbled, still laying sprawled out on the floor.
“I’m so sorry though!”
Pinching the bridge of her nose, Catra laughed. “Fuck, you’re such a klutz, maybe that’s why I love you so much.”
Adora gasped. “Catra…”
She looked up at Adora, their eyes meeting. “What- oh .”
Her lips curled and a wide grin formed on Adora’s face. “You said it! You said the L-word!”
Smiling because Adora was, Catra’s features softened and she chuckled. “I told you I’d be able to do it.”
Leaning down and planting a kiss on the corner of the girl’s lips, Adora kept on grinning like a child on a rollercoaster. “I didn’t lose faith in you for one moment.”
“Great, now can you get off me, my love?”
“You said it again!” Adora exclaimed.
Rolling her eyes playfully as Adora helped her up and they got off of the floor, Catra pressed their foreheads together. “I think it’s going to be a permanent thing.”
Adora gasped. “So you’re saying we’re going to be together forever?”
Catra scoffed. “That was already guaranteed before I told you that I loved you! There’s no way we’re leaving each other! And if you do, I’ll fucking kill you!”
As they laughed together, the two of them shared a kiss and Catra let out a dreamy sigh. Nothing could penetrate the happiness that she was feeling at the moment. Even though the cookies were ruined and they might have to make another batch together, she overcame her fear and managed to admit her real feelings to her lover, who gladly accepted it and cherished it.
I did it, it was tough and hard to come to my senses with my feelings, but I did it. I just wanted to say, fuck you Weaver. I found out the true meaning of love, not the bullshit that you told me. I found someone who was going to love me forever and I wasn’t going to let that go.
This was the time I was at my peak of happiness and I wanted that to last forever. But I learned I just can’t stay in one place all the time- Time is inevitable and a real bitch and the era where I was at my happiest was over. At the time, I hated Time for changing my happiness, I hated myself for thinking that I could have made a difference, that I could have saved her. But then I realized that, like Time, this was inevitable, it was bound to happen.
Again, that was in the past, as I am writing this, years after these events. I am thankful for my time with Adora and if you are reading this, Adora, I love you and this book is dedicated to you, my one and only love.
Catra sat on the grass. She turned the last page of the book and reread the last sentence in her Author's note: I am thankful for my time with Adora and if you are reading this, Adora, I love you and this book is dedicated to you, my one and only love. She let out a sigh as she listened to the rain softly tapping on her black umbrella.
She laid her book, To Love Another, against Adora’s grave and sat crisscrossed in front of it, her eyes reading the engraved message on her grave: At least I got to love you during my forever.
“Hey Adora,” Catra choked out. “I never thought I would write a story fully on romance- especially one about us- but here I am. I wanted to write a book dedicated to you and I wanted people to know our story, and it became a bestseller! How about that?” she exclaimed. “I just know you would be happy if you were here.”
She looked up at the cloudy skies and exhaled a hot breath. “I miss you so much, I know you’re probably watching over me right now, but I wanna see you again. It isn’t the same without you, I know it’s been two years since the accident, but I’m still not used to being without you. I hope- wherever you are- you still remember me and think about me.”
Catra chuckled. “If not, that’s why I brought the book to you! It’s a pretty long book since it talks about our relationship from start to finish, but I just wanted to read you the last couple of sections since I just wanted to remind you that I’ll always love you.” She smiled sadly. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure to come by every weekend and read it to you, and yes, this time I’ll start from the beginning.” She placed her hand on the top of the grave and traced Adora’s engraved name with her finger. “I loved you for ‘your forever,’ but I’ll keep on loving you until ‘my forever’ ends.”
Letting out a sigh, she let her umbrella fall out of her hand and rested her head against the grave, the soft rain flowing on her skin and damping her long hair which she tied into a ponytail. Catra stared up into the sky and allowed the ghost of her lover wrap her arms around her as it did once before.