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It was late in the night, no one was awake save for Vicious and Aegis. They had their usual arrangement (when they could afford an extra inn room); Kanata and the girls had their room and the knight and Great Transgressor had theirs.
Vicious had been...off the past few days. Not talking as much. Distant. This was their first time alone together in days and Vicious had gone to bed without a word.
Aegis thought nothing of it at first and decided to sleep. But as the night went on, he remembered Vicious avoided touching him, or even face him most of the day. Even now, he was bizarrly close to the edge of the bed, avoiding contact.
Aegis scooted closer, but Vicious scooted away.
"Vicious?"
No response.
"Vicious, I know you're awake. Are you...Is something bothering you?"
Vicious's chest felt heavy and he didn't understand why. He didn't like this feeling and he wished he wasn't in the room right now. He wished Aegis wouldn't look at him.
Vicious sat up, still not facing Aegis.
"Vicious? Where are you going?"
"Not tired. I'm headin' out."
Vicious began to stand but Aegis leaned over and took his arm. Vicious's head turned a bit to look at Aegis's hand. It felt like something was in his throat.
"No, you should rest," Aegis moved closer, hugging the other's arm, "And besides, I have not been able to see you much lately."
The urge to pull away was strong. His chest was tight and the lump in his throat had only gotten worse. He turned his face away.
Stop touching me.
Aegis could feel Vicious tense up when he moved closer.
"Vicious, please, what is the ma--Vicious?!"
Tears filled Vicious's eyes and his cheeks were red. Aegis immediately moved to face him, but Vicious kept turning away.
"Stop it, stop lookin' at me..."
"What's wrong? Why are you--"
Vicious stood to leave and Aegis got up to stop him. All Aegis could think to do was wrap his arms around Vicious's waist.
"Let go! Get offa me!"
"No, tell me what's wrong. Please, Vicious."
Vicious felt his tears beginning to streak his cheeks. He didn't want Aegis to look at him, especially not like this.
"You can talk to me. I want you to know that."
Vicious stopped resisting. His chest hurt so much. He wanted to turn to Aegis so bad. He wanted to run out of the room, but he stood still. There were so many things he wanted to do but he just stood and shut his eyes. He felt Aegis come around him. Vicious knew the other was facing him, watching him cry like a baby. How pathetic.
Aegis didn't say anything. He gently placed his hand on Vicious's cheek and wiped a tear away with his thumb. Vicious fought the urge to swat away the other's hand.
Stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it.
Aegis stepped closer and embraced the taller man. He noticed his usual loose stance was tense.
Vicious's eyes shot open when he felt arms wrap around him gently. Aegis was warm, his shirt was so soft against his bare abdomen. He could feel Aegis's breath against him.
"Vicious..." Aegis spoke so tenderly, "Let's sit down, okay?"
They sat side by side, Vicious still faced away from Aegis, hunched over with his chin in his palm. Aegis was holding Vicious's arm, leaning on his shoulder. He still felt so tense.
"You can tell me what's wrong, Vicious. I've been worrying about you."
Vicious did not want to speak. He doesn't want to know what his voice would sound like.
"You've been avoiding me. I know you have. I just...can you tell me if I did something wrong?"
"...Nah, it ain't you," Vicious mumbles.
"Then...have you lost interest...?"
"...No."
His chest feels heavy again. He wants it to stop. If he could reach inside and tear out what was weighing him down right now, he would. Feeling Aegis at his side, his warmth, only made Vicious hurt worse. Why was Aegis so worried about him? Why did he care?
The way Aegis looked at him, held him when they were alone. His voice was different when the others werent around. Vicious didn't understand why. Why would he deserve such tenderness? And why does he keep craving it?
What did Aegis see in such an ugly, bloodthirsty monster?
"...cious? Vicious?"
He suddenly saw Aegis in front of him, a hand cupped around his cheek, his brows furrowed with worry.
"Vicious, please. What's wrong, please tell me."
Aegis had never seen Vicious in this state. Tense and shrinking away from any sight. His eyes were wet with tears. He's never heard him speak so low before. He sounded almost hollow and yet full of something...something Aegis couldn't place.
Vicious looked away, as if just noticing Aegis was there.
"Just... just stop."
"Stop? Stop what?"
"Stop...stop talkin' like that. And--and don't look at me like that."
"Like what? Vicious, I'm just worried--"
"Why? There's nothin' fuckin' wrong with me."
"Vicious, you've been so distant for days. You won't talk to me or touch me or even look at me. And now you're crying."
"It's you're fault! You keep actin' wierd! You're all fuckin' nice now and I don't fuckin' get it! This some kinda joke? Why the hell ya nice to me? Why're ya smilin at me? Holdin me? Ya want somethin?"
The look Aegis gives hurts Vicious in a way he didn't understand. His eyes were wide and almost pleading.
"Vicious, I'm nice because I care about you--"
"Why? No one's ever cared about the Great Transgressor and why would anyone now?"
Something began to build. That familiar flow.
"You deserve kindness like anyone--"
"I don't need yer pity."
He could feel his pulse, his anger rising.
"Vicious, this isn't pity."
"Oh it ain't? Ya used to be so damn fed up with me. Now ya play nice?"
Destruction.
"I didn't understand then. I...I didn't know you."
"Ya think ya know me now?"
Annihilation.
"I do. At least, better than before..."
...?
"Spending all this time with you, I've begun to appreciate some of your behaviors..."
No...
"Some I've even started to admire."
Stop...
Aegis was lost in his thoughts, his heart warm, "The way you just do whatever you want,"
Stop it...
"...your dastardly grin and laugh, feral yet graceful movements..."
Stop it...!
You have your frustrating moments, but you're surprisngly kind in your own odd way--"
STOP IT!
With every word Aegis said, Vicious felt a stab. He made himself shrink smaller and smaller, holding it all in. It wasn't true. He's lying to him. His face was wet and he felt the release.
Vicious looked at his hands. The hands of the devil.
Vicious stood, "Is this what ya fucking want? Ya wanna care about a monster?!"
Aegis stood as well, seemingly unphased. He calmly took Vicious's hands into his own, gently cupping them around his tender cheeks. The warmth in his eyes only grew.
"Yes," the knight said simply.
Vicious could only gawk until he felt his eyes well up again. Aegis tenderly pulled him close and he was wrapped in the demon's arms and tail. Vicious weeped as the knight ran his fingers through his hair.