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Cold sweat poured down Shouta's face. His gaze was fixed on the calamity that lay before him. His eyes were wide and his hands trembled. "I didn't mean to," he whispered, more to himself. "This was an accident, but how can I...." He bit his lip until a fine trail of blood ran down his chin and dripped onto the floor.
Hizashi and he had argued many times before. As with any couple, everything wasn't always shrouded in rosy clouds with them. They were very different characters and accordingly the sparks flew between them from time to time.
Shouta was definitely to blame for their argument today and he was aware of that.
He had just finished work and cleaned his desk, when the blond came to him. Hizashi had simply asked him if they didn't want to have an after-work beer together with their colleagues from U.A.. But Shouta had had a stressful day with his class, plus a headache and overwhelming fatigue. His answer was accordingly curt. He just didn't feel like going out and drinking. And he didn't want company other than Hizashi tonight either. He just wanted to cuddle up on the sofa with his boyfriend and fall asleep while they would watch some boring movie. The blond, however, was eager to go out for a drink with their colleagues. He wasn't angry at all that Shouta didn't feel like it and just said that they would see each other tonight or tomorrow morning then. He even wanted to kiss the black-haired man goodbye, but Shouta felt rejected and left alone. He pushed Hizashi back and became loud. So loud that their colleagues preferred to leave the room to let them sort it out on their own. Shouta accused Hizashi of preferring their colleagues over him and Hizashi countered that they didn't have anything planned together today after all. Shouta was indignant and the pain in his head was getting worse. He screamed at Hizashi that he was only thinking about himself and his pleasure and that they would not spend any more time as a couple. Shouta knew that wasn't true, but he hoped that the blond would relent if he made him feel guilty. But Hizashi didn't buckle and shot back at the same volume. For his part, he now accused Shouta of putting aside all his social contacts and hobbies because of him anyway, precisely to spend more time with the black-haired. Shouta knew that this was true and that Hizashi often sacrificed a lot for their relationship, but he didn't want to hear that tonight.
They argued for quite a while longer, throwing accusations at each other. Shouta was aware that he was wrong and that he should have just let Hizashi go. But he couldn't jump over his shadow and the argument ended only when the blond turned around and left the room angrily. He slammed the door with such force that Shouta briefly thought it would burst. He heard Hizashi talking to their colleagues, then everyone left the building and silence fell.
Shouta's head was pounding and he was inwardly grateful that Hizashi had his quirk so well under control that it had never broken out on him even in an argument and when he was angry. But he went home with a large portion of anger in his belly and when he got there, he smashed the door into the lock so hard that it almost fell off its hinges. He threw his jacket and shoes on the floor and looked for something in the shared apartment on which he could vent his rage.
And now he stood here and looked at the broken pieces in front of his feet. In his rage, he had kicked one of the shelves and unfortunately pulled down Hizashi's LP collection. Most of them had landed on the sofa or the living room carpet, but one unfortunately had not. The fragments now lay on the floor in front of Shouta and guilt washed over him. He got down on his knees, eyes wet and gathered up the pieces. When he picked up the cover, he saw that he had gotten "The Wall" by Pink Floyd, of all things. He placed the fragments on the living room table and stared at the empty LP cover. He could remember how happy the blond had been when he had bought this valuable LP at an auction. He told Shouta then that he had loved the band as a child, since his father was a big fan and the music was played a lot at their home. Since the death of his father, this music had been a great comfort for him and when the blond had decided to confess his feelings to Shouta, he had heard this very song "The Wall". So this LP was also connected to their relationship. And now it was Shouta who had destroyed this treasure. He couldn't even imagine how Hizashi would react if he came home tonight. Shouta fervently hoped that he would be too drunk to notice right away and then they could talk about it calmly tomorrow. Would Hizashi be angry? Sad? Both? Shouta's heart beat heavily in his chest and anger at himself overwhelmed him. He pounded the ground with his fist so forcefully that his knuckles began to bleed and at least one of his fingers broke. Then the sound of a key turning in the lock made him wince. "Hey Shou," he heard the blond say as he closed the door. "I'm sorry about our fight. I shouldn't have been so loud. Hey, I brought us food. We've got the whole evening to ourselves, okay?" Shouta was kneeling with his back to the door, so Hizashi probably hadn't seen what had happened yet. The black-haired man felt nauseous. His heart almost burst in his chest and he was afraid to turn to Hizashi. But he didn't have to, because the blond beat him to it by walking over to him and leaning down. Seeing the blood and Shouta holding his hand, he placed the food on the living room table and knelt down next to the black haired man. "What did you do?" he asked with concern, reaching for Shouta's hand, who felt like he was going to throw up at any moment. Hizashi didn't seem to have seen the broken LP yet. He was completely fixated on Shouta's injured hand. His hands were cold from the winter air outside and yet the black-haired man felt nothing but warmth emanating from his boyfriend. "I'm sorry," he whispered. Hizashi looked up and smiled. "I'm sorry for our fight, too." "No," Shouta replied. "Your LP...." He gestured with his head toward the table and Hizashi followed his movement. Now he noticed the fragments lying on the table. He let go of Shouta's hand and reached for the shards. Even without seeing the cover, he seemed to know which of his LPs it was. Shouta couldn't see his face, but when he saw tears running down Hizashi's cheeks, he became afraid. Had this accident destroyed their relationship? "I'm ... so ... sorry ... I'm so sorry, Zashi. I didn't mean to.... I didn't. Really," the black-haired man stammered, completely forgetting about the pain in his hand. He reached for the blond's shoulder with his injured hand. Hizashi did not evade the touch, but made no sign of turning to Shouta either. Then he took up the cover.
"Zashi?"
"While I was listening to that song, I decided to confess my feelings to you."
"I know." Tears formed in Shouta's eyes.
"Pink Floyd was my father's favorite band."
"I know." Shouta's voice broke.
"Getting the LP took a lot of searching and patience."
The lump in Shouta's throat grew thicker. He didn't know what else to say or do to prove to his boyfriend how sorry he was. He slid close to Hizashi, rested his head on his neck, wrapped his arms around his chest and pressed their bodies together. Tears rolled down his cheeks. His biggest fear was that the blond would leave him now. Finally, he felt Hizashi take a deep breath and put the cover to the fragments. He wriggled out of Shouta's embrace and turned to face him.
"Zashi, please..." the black haired man could barely get a word out. But to his surprise, his boyfriend didn't seem angry.
"I'm sorry I made you so angry that you......"
"WHAT?" Shouta was more than surprised by this statement. "No, it's not your fault after all. It was ME who lost control. I wanted to spend time alone with you so much that I didn't care at all that you needed your space once in a while. If you leave me now, then..."
"Leave you?" Hizashi looked at him with his bright green eyes in complete surprise. "Why would I do that? Because of the argument? Or because of the broken LP?" He took Shouta's face between his hands and rested his forehead on the black-haired man's. "I love you, Shouta. Even a quarrel won't change that, and certainly not a broken object. I'm sad, yes, but that's all." Shouta was stunned by Hizashi's words and placed his hands on the blond's.
"Did you really think that, Shou?"
The black-haired man let out a laugh and nodded. "Very briefly, yes."
"You're an idiot! But you're my idiot." He tilted Shouta's head up and kissed him affectionately. Shouta returned the kiss eagerly, wrapping his arms around Hizashi's neck and pulling him closer.