Chapter Text
“Peter!” Stiles screamed, bolting upright. Warm arms wrapped around him, and for a moment Stiles held hope that it might be his absent mate.
“Stiles, Stiles it's okay.” Chris pulled the boy down into the bed, glancing nervously at the fluttering curtains. “Shhh, I’m here. I’m here.” Stiles whimpered as he was pulled into his other mate’s chest, then started to full out cry when his brain finally caught up to Peter’s absence. He remembered being tied down, helpless, as the Beserkers ripped his mate apart faster than he could regenerate. He would laugh that this was one of the rare moments that Chris could say he saved the day, if he wasn’t too late to put an arrow through the Darach’s heart.
“He’s gone,” Stiles croaked.
”I know,” Chris murmured quietly. “I know.”
“It hurts Chris. Why won’t it stop hurting?” Chris made a pained sound and pulled Stiles closer but didn’t answer him.
“Try to get some sleep.” Stiles let out a broken noise, but clung hard to Chris and shut his eyes. He didn’t know exactly when he fell asleep, but it only felt like moments before he found himself awake and alone in bed. He could feel Chris through the mate bond of his spark, and knew he was still in the house. Stiles followed the feeling out into the kitchen where Chris was making breakfast.
Stiles sat down blankly at the kitchen table. Chris turned around at the sound and gave a small smile. “The eggs are almost ready. You hungry?” Stiles shrugged. “Well I will put them in the fridge if you do. I… I got a call in from work. I’m planning on going in today. Is that okay?” Stiles shrugged. “Call me if you need anything, okay Stiles?” Stiles shrugged again, and Chris sighed, placing a plate of eggs in front of Stiles. “Try to eat okay? I’ll pick up take out on my way home.” Chris placed a kiss on stiles forehead and walked out the door.
Stiles stared blankly into space for a few minutes and poked at the eggs with his fork. He was upset. Chris was supposed to be on leave for another week. They both needed time after one third of their mating bond got ripped away a month ago.
Time was a thing Stiles never had enough of. First with his mom, then dad, now Peter. Chris acted like he had plenty of time, and maybe he did. Stiles was so much younger after all and new to their dynamic. Stiles wasn’t going to sit down and do nothing. Not this time. He needed his mates, both of them.
For the first time in a month Stiles was feeling driven. Getting up, Stiles bolted down to his workshop in the basement. Books started piling up on the table as he pulled them all off the shelves in between grabbing ingredients for a scrying spell to run in the background. Once he was settled and everything he needed for the spell was ready, Stiles sat down and read. This was how Chris found him hours later, as he came down the stairs with the full plate of eggs from this morning.
“Stiles, you should have eaten-” Chris stopped short to look at his mate, who didn’t look up from his books. Chris could see the shaking in Stiles’ hands from working long term magic. “Stiles.” Chris said again, louder and sharper than before. The spark startled him into looking up. The spell behind him deactivated.
“Chris you came back! Did work decide they didn’t need you anyhow?”
“Stiles, it’s 6:30. How long have you been at this?”
“I just came down after breakfast, I didn’t mean to be so long.”
“Stiles, you're shaking. Come here” Chris set the plate down on a work desk.
“No food on the-”
“Stiles, I’ll get it later, come here.” Stiles gave a wry smile and started towards Chris, stumbling only a little. Chris engulfed him in his arms and then lifted him up over his shoulder.
“Ack! Chris put me down! What are you doing?!”
“Taking you upstairs, I brought Chinese and we are both going to eat some.”
As Chris passed out the food, he told Stiles about his day. “So I know I said I was going to take more time off, and I am grieving Stiles I am, but I need to keep busy. And Kyle needs all the hands he can get, with hunting seasons starting. And there’s the commission I need to make for the new Argent head. I need to go back to full-time Stiles.” Stiles stilled and shrugged his shoulders, saying nothing.
“And it looks like you are starting something too, did you take a commission?”
Stiles shook his head. “Research.”
“That’s exciting, the last time you did a personal research project was for the New Mexico Lochness rumors. I know you were too busy for a while there to even think independently, and then well…..everything. What are you researching?”
“Life magic” Stiles looked at Chris with defiant eyes, expecting a lecture, but Chris just sagged his shoulders and said. “Oh.”
“How do you do it?” Began stiles, slowly building up steam. “How do you pretend like everything is fine? I know you’re sad, heck I can feel you’re sad. But how can you act like everything’s okay? Because it's not, it's not okay. One third of the bond just got torn away and it hurts. And seeing you act like nothing happened hurts too. Because, for the first time in a long time you are holding back Chris, withholding your emotions from me. If it wasn’t for our bond I wouldn’t know anything! And the fact that I have to go through so many layers to find out what's going on with you, that you won't share with me, that hurts too!” Chris took this all in with a blank stare. Stiles huffed in frustration. “That’s what I’m talking about.”
“Stiles-” Chris sighed, his shoulders sagging down once more “Stiles I am grieving. I am sad. I just can’t lose it right now. I've experienced this too much to not keep it together. I’m grieving in my own way. I just…..and you, I need to take care of you Stiles, and I can’t do that if both of us are falling apart-”
“-oh, so I’m falling apart now?!”
“Stiles listen, I am not openly grieving because I don’t need to. It hurts, it hurts so fucking much but it will go away in time. I know this. What I need right now Stiles is for you to be okay, to help you get over it. If that means I really need to take more time off work, I’ll work something out. If that means sitting by and watching you research life magic, then I’ll do that.”
“Chris, I. I don’t care if you go to work. I just want to feel...to feel less helpless. I want to be on even ground. Today.. researching.. I felt like I had some control. And now I feel helpless again and I don’t know what I want.”
Chris walked around the table and pulled his mate into a hug. “Shhh. So research life magic, if that's what is going to put you back on an even keel. Just Stiles, know your limitations and don’t overwork yourself like you did today.”
“It was a simple spell.”
“That you held for 11 hours, while reading.”
“I’ll try” Chris kissed Stiles' forehead.
“Good. Now let's go to bed, forget about the mess. I’ll clean it up in the morning.”
Stiles snorted. “You mean you will wake up and run to work, while I stay back and clean up. Don’t think I’ve forgotten the plate in the basement.”
“I clean!”
“No you don’t, you let Peter clean up after you!” Stiles stopped walking. Chris gently squeezed his hand.
“It's not my fault he was better at cleaning than me. Come on, let's head to bed, you must be exhausted.” He led Stiles to the bedroom and began dressing his boy in pajamas, one of Peter’s old
T-Shirts.
“Chris” Stiles started once they were settled in bed.
“Yeah?”
“It will get better soon, right?”
“Of course, Stiles.” With his mate’s reassurance and the research of the day filling his head, Stiles fell into a peaceful sleep.